| | Imaginary love triangle??Page 2 of 5 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5) | | Inspector Cluesseau would be proud. Wow 31 and acting like a 13 year old. Please use birth control. | |
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| Imaginary love triangle??
Posted: 7/16/2012 11:04:22 AM | | If you don't trust a guy, end it. Simple as that. All this insane subterfuge is not necessary. | |
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| Imaginary love triangle??
Posted: 7/16/2012 11:25:27 AM | | What I do not understand is what type of guy tells a woman after one date, that she is the only one, and that he is not talking to anyone else. Is this something that he offered to get her? Or something that in her questioning sort of elicited from the guy? The guy is a blatant lier? But even lies carry an intended reason an motivation. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 12:11:14 PM | just putting my vote in.
I like a good come-uppance as well as anyone else, and I'm not AS down on you for the test trick you played, however, I am very much in accord with the several people who said that he actually isn't going to learn much from your "lesson."
I vote that you don't tell him anything. Just break things off, and give him a true but vague reason like "after some thought, I have a general sense that we just aren't compatible enough to bother trying."
If you tell him, your pleasure will be short-lived, and probably no where near what you imagine. Most likely (based on witnessing lots of guys getting caught lying), he will get angry and self-righteous, and claim that he knew all along that it was you, and that he was only stringing "both" of you along, in order to teach YOU a lesson.
Besides, the last thing you would want to do, is to help him to better hide his lies with the next gal, right? | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 12:20:38 PM |
Crazy? Yes. Dumb? Probably. I just HATE being lied to and I warned this fool not to lie to me. He's younger and kind of dumber, so I really want to teach him this lesson.
What do you guys think?
I think you complicate your own life way too much and got wayyyy too much time on your hands.
I also think there`s many ways that are better and more usefull to prove that 95% of the men on this website are idiotic, stupid, disgusting pigs just out for booty, who are cheating on their gfs and moving on to their next victim. I`m sure you could have found out differently than how you did.
Although I applaud your scheming, let`s say your in a relationship at some point with a guy who IS all that he says he is; discovering you doing that kind of stuff (and if it were me, I probably WOULD, because I have that kind of an instinct) will very quickly cause him to get out of Dodge in a hurry.
If you want to hear stories about how people cant trust each other anymore, and how both men and women and general have a problems with respecting the two simple rules: "Dont lie to me and DONT cheat on me" than PM me, I got a whooping walop of stories to tell you, some of them ordinary, some of them really gory  LOL.
Anyways, bottom line, don`t do stuff like that. If you got a bad feeling, just bail on him. Everyone deserves a chance at something honest, and playing games like this, no matter WHO is playing WHO, is never good, and a bad habit. The young fool isnt going to learn a lesson at all; he`ll just leave thinking your nutz.
That`s the webbynet for ya.... | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 12:44:15 PM | As soon as you realized that he was a liar and was playing you and however many more you should have BEEN GONE!!!
No questions asked you already seen how he was going to treat you and other women you shouldn't have wasted your time to prove anything. You have kids make them your priority don't lower yourself to a players game. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 12:52:33 PM |
Besides, the last thing you would want to do, is to help him to better hide his lies with the next gal, right?
You’ve got awesome advice from everybody. Don’t help him become a better liar. Leave it alone and move on. Block him if you have to. Or you can say you changed your mind and want to part ways so he leaves you alone.
In order to do what you did you must have been really hurt and used by others in the past and him. You've gotta find a way to express and deal with these feelings somehow. Work on making peace with those experiences so you don’t have to seek revenge or prove something to anybody. Cause in the process you are only hurting yourself. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 12:55:51 PM | I think you have a wonderful sting operation going on there OP, despite what others may say............some people just don't like getting caught in their own lies and deceptions. Of course she's got "trust issues," ........that's because too many people are deceitful and untrustworthy and she's finally taking a stand against a deceptive person and doing something about it.
Good for you my dear, respecting yourself first before others who may be deceptive is always a good policy. Let me know how this turns out for you, and I hope you won't make to big of deal of it with him and just move on quickly to avoid any further stress in your life..........after all, he's really not worthy of your time anymore and it's not like you ever fell in love with him anyway, Right???
Your a smart one and Emma Peel would be proud of you. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 1:13:32 PM | Crazy? Yes. Dumb? Probably. I just HATE being lied to.....
But you sure seem to enjoy lying.
I am still trying to figure out how a 30-something year old woman with 4 kids could possibly have so much time on her hands that she can play games like this. You met this guy once, talked to him for a couple of weeks and immediately started messing with him, if this is how you treat new people then you deserve to be alone for a long time. You really need to grow up. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 1:23:13 PM |
I am still trying to figure out how a 30-something year old woman with 4 kids could possibluy have so much time on her hands that she can play games like this.
The OP does NOT have 4 children.............the imaginary 3rd person in this love triangle does, and the imaginary 3rd person is a fictitious character. No disrespect, but you need to re-read the original post.
ONCE AGAIN.............THE OP DOES NOT HAVE 4 CHILDREN. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 1:33:03 PM | I'm not sure what changes people's character base, well, I have a couple of ideas but I'm fairly sure this escapade isn't it.
I will say though that you've set this up to this end.
Because A - there was no conversations of excluisvity.
B - You're immediate distrust of him is not healthy (I mean that factually and not to make you defensive).
And C - I don't think online dating is for you because there most likely would be a stage where you're getting to know someone and there is no exclusive dating agreed upon yet. During this time - like a month or 6, whatever it takes, both parties would be still dating and looking around, assumedly, and you're going to go out of your mind in that stage if this is what you'll do with someone you don't care a ton for.
Think this over. Unless you'd like spend your future trying to catch someone trying to lie to you. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 1:49:21 PM |
I know a lot of you tell me that I'm just as bad and horrible as he is. Maybe that's true.
I don't think your bad or horrible, but I do think your plan was quite brilliant and extremely humorous and for those who don't see the humor in it...................well they just need to pull that lump of coal out of their arses that has been stuck up there since last Christmas. Nothing like a good bowel movement, to put a smile on your face.
I had no access to read your profile OP.......so I really didn't know that you have 4 children, probably best that you concentrate on raising your children and have a little fun every now and then. My father taught me at an early age not to fall for men too easily...........because there is a big difference between falling in love and falling in lust. One of those things leads to having more children that you can comfortably handle. Good Luck and Stay Well. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 1:52:26 PM | I vote for option #3: call him and tell him that you've found a man that is more attractive and he's also got a bigger penis and you're done playing with his little guy.
This is nuts! I can't believe you went to all of this trouble over a guy that lies excessively.
You should've been honest with him when you found out he was lying to you and explained that you weren't interested in games played by oversexed pervs that aren't smart enough to be shady. You're much better at being shady than he is....you need to meet your match. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 1:55:39 PM | You need to stop looking at every first meet or handful of texts like it is the beginning of something huge. It is just a cup of coffee or a walk in the park....nothing more. you may decide after 2-3 meets you don't even like the guy. Expect that to happen 99% of the time. Not everyone is a match for you.
Men will talk to you and any other woman that strikes their interest, and they have every right to do this with NO expectations from you, it's called casual dating. Stop demanding fidelity from a virtual stranger. Why should a man stop using this website, stop talking to other ladies or put his entire life on the shelf because he met you ONE TIME. Give a relationship time to become a relationship, stop rushing.
Until you become friends, dated for a while and decide to be intimate (when you are ready) you should not expect a damn thing from anyone other than kindness and courtesy. You get played because you don't take the time to get to know a people or your picker is broke. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 2:09:16 PM | Wow. That is a LOT of crap to go through over a guy you met a month ago. You wasted half your time as ‘Dana’ with him as you did as yourself.
.I have been hurt and used a lot in the past. I guess this time I was just trying to prevent it from happening again. :-/
Proving you caught him in lies isn’t gonna prevent you from getting hurt or used. Ya know, YOU can prevent yourself from being hurt by guys by not allowing them to hurt you.
Raise your bar, honey, you’re smart and don’t give yourself enough credit.
You should set up shop as a cheater catching PI. You’d make a fortune and you’d be too busy to be lonely.  | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 2:17:38 PM | While I'm generally not a huge fan of the pro feminist type of fear mongering I tend to see on the forums, I would say this might be a case where you have to take some consideration for your personal safety. You don't know this person very well and, well frankly, getting into a highly emotional confrontation might not be the best play for you. This is a person who could react in all manners of ways, which might include things that extend to, sadly and hopefully not, some type of violence.
I think on a base level for you for your emotional health, it's a good idea to walk away, and in the future, maybe walk away sooner.
I also think, on a level for your personal safety, it's a good idea to also walk away and walk as far away as possible.
Good luck. Well I think. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 2:40:28 PM |
Raise your bar, honey, you’re smart and don’t give yourself enough credit.
You should set up shop as a cheater catching PI. You’d make a fortune and you’d be too busy to be lonely.
She's right and you know it OP................so own your smarts and make it work for you!
If your lonely..............some to most men will only dull that pain for as long as it takes for them to have an orgasm, or say about 10 minutes to an hour. There are many more hours in a day that you can put to good use with your kind of smarts. I don't know where you live OP, but another option is to join a single parents group, where they alternate child sitting favors for each other, no money changes hands and you get some time away from children to focus on yourself. The happier that Mom is, the happier your children are going to be when your time with them is quality time. Hope you have lots of family who are supportive and of course you need to show them your appreciation. Surround yourself with other high quality single mothers, have potlucks or jointly cook a dinner with another single mom, while children play and enjoy. Just some suggestions that I have for you, that's all.
You probably should take a much deserved break from men........especially if they have caused you so much anguish. Know your limits and establish some boundaries. Good Luck!! | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 2:55:53 PM |
She's right and you know it OP................so own your smarts and make it work for you!
If the OP is going to do a P.I. business she needs to get a P.I. license.
However I have to agree with using your smarts to catch a cheater I was able to catch both my wives cheating and doing so saved me a bundle in the divorces.
I was able to keep my divorce costs down to under $2,000.00 between the two.
So being able to bust cheaters is a good thing. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 2:58:59 PM | OP, you are a smart cookie.
now that you know,
what you wanted to know.....
just dump him and move on.
without any needless(and avoidable) drama. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 3:11:29 PM | | Bloody hell - and I thought I was bad! I don't really understand what you gained from this. Perhaps you had an instinct about him and this is confirmed, but it's not really fair. It's called the honey trap and invariably works. Why don't you leave well alone, now. You do sound hurt and meddling more with him will make you feel worse. I hope you feel better soon. | |
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Posted: 7/16/2012 3:35:19 PM | | you are strong.. you admitted you just wanted to feel loved and you wanted to believe that illusion.. takes guts to admit that. i think we all been there. its strange, from your last message i felt your pain. and i have not drunk :). | |
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