| | Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?Page 4 of 6 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6) |
Pass them by. Stop communicating with them. Wait for a REAL man who isn't so passive and timid.
Well said Fair Oaks Chick....I have been emailing this guy now for about 2 weeks. He keeps dropping "hints" to ask him out. I just flat out told him...if you are waiting for me to ask you out, you are gonna be waiting a LONG time. I just don't do that....He knows I am interested...gave him my number, suggested a meet and greet....but he won't take the initiative. If they are that lazy now I can imagine what else they are lazy at...LOL !! I don't do lazy.
so, let me guess this right...
you slate the OP for waiting a week for 3 guys to ask her out telling her to drop them and wait for a REAL man who isn't passive or timid...then you tell us you're in contact with a guy for 2 WEEKS and he still hasn't asked you out...why haven't got dropped him and waited for a real man then? | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 7/31/2012 7:59:31 PM | so, let me guess this right...
you slate the OP for waiting a week for 3 guys to ask her out telling her to drop them and wait for a REAL man who isn't passive or timid...then you tell us you're in contact with a guy for 2 WEEKS and he still hasn't asked you out...why haven't got dropped him and waited for a real man then?
Why don't I drop him? Drop what? There isn't anything or wasn't anything to be dropped. I don't email him unless he emails me. But if he does communicate again...at this point I would most likely not respond. So I guess that would be "dropping" him....does that answer your question?? | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/1/2012 10:17:25 AM | But men who are considerate "alpha males" suit me best.
Then don't complain when they don't do what you want them to do.
but women take the more passive role in the dating chase not the guy.
Men don't chase women they want to keep, just the ones they want as notches.
And they shouldn't complain when we don't respond or reject them...as we are being alpha females and making our decisions as well....
Notches? That is so lame and such bullshit...as this might apply for you...but not all. So if men don't pursue...then how can they have "notches?" or better yet any type of meaningful dating/ relationship at all??? | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/1/2012 11:13:26 AM | | Didn't read all the posts, But sometimes when you talk to a woman. If she don't come across as intrested or if you not sure what she wants. It just easier to not ask her out. If a woman is intrested and shows her intrest its easier to ask her out. With out having that akward moment with your foot stuck in your mouth. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/1/2012 1:47:04 PM | Didn't read all the posts, But sometimes when you talk to a woman. If she don't come across as intrested or if you not sure what she wants. It just easier to not ask her out. If a woman is intrested and shows her intrest its easier to ask her out. With out having that akward moment with your foot stuck in your mouth.
You sir win the prize and I couldn't agree more.
If you women are interested in us then give us a hint, online dating is tough and we don't get signals like in the real world. In the real world if a woman smiles and says "hi" we know she's interested, when you meet in person women also flirt which shows they are interested. When messaging online or talking on the phone we have to guess if she's interested, verbalizing how you feel goes a long way. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/3/2012 1:41:40 AM | I've noticed that if I put it off a bit longer I give myself the chance to truly assess our potential compatibility through casual chatting. Or somebody's nutbar tendencies will shine through at some point. Either way, I win. Otherwise you walk the fine line of becoming a serial dater. A its lame, and B its expensive!
Also consider that we all know how many nutbars ask women for a date in having said two words to one another. Some of us prefer not to get lumped in with that shite pile. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/3/2012 5:23:27 PM | | There is nothing wrong with having a little fear of rejection, which is what I think is the likely culprit here. They could also be CHAT-AHOLICS as well. I am having a similar problem with a girl I am talking with right now. I asked her out after 4 days of messaging and sh said she worked the whole week and didn't know her schedule for the following week. I thought that was ok and so we chatted for a few more days. Then she gave me her number without me even asking for it, so of course I think its ok to try to ask her out again after a couple more days of texting and she said she didn't know her schedule yet again which is just stupid in my eyes. I'm convinced she is teasing and just loves to flirt. It's too bad I haven't come across someone like you, at least we would have gone out by now and see if we are actually compatible. Either way, the three you're talking too aren't women so it could just be the fear which I think is perfectly normal. When I ask a girl out I get an uncomfortable feeling deep in my gut lol. Go ahead and ask , if they really want to go out with you it would be more of a relief for them. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/3/2012 5:31:51 PM | Why do girls want to know your whole life story before swapping numbers?
Paranoia, in a word? Media and culturally induced paranoia in 5.
I can't be bothered to ask a girl out from online dating because they want to talk so much online. You ask them out they say yeah sometime, and then..... so many more questions and so much more chat.
If I say sorry I don't want to chat online anymore, then I'm the rude one. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/4/2012 8:29:54 AM | Some women will ONLY date a guy when they can feel in control... if he asks her, then she maintains her aloofness (rather than showing direct interest) and puts him in the position of "trying to win her over".
It's not about having an alpha male, it about being able to control the man you're with. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/4/2012 10:38:17 AM | I've never been out with a woman who wanted 'to control' me. Many women rightly want to feel that they are special...a damsel worth slaying dragons for. That was always fine with me because I want a woman that I'm in love with to feel secure in knowing that I'd do absolutely anything for her. She comes first in everything. A woman can thus be at ease and has no need to control anything...she holds back nothing of herself and is honest and giving.
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/4/2012 10:41:23 AM | Some women will ONLY date a guy when they can feel in control... it about being able to control the man you're with.
Good luck with that attitude, I don't like a controlling woman and I would feel smothered. There's a difference between caring and being controlling. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/4/2012 2:20:38 PM |
Some women will ONLY date a guy when they can feel in control... if he asks her, then she maintains her aloofness (rather than showing direct interest) and puts him in the position of "trying to win her over".
It's not about having an alpha male, it about being able to control the man you're with.
A woman's desire to feel in control of a situation involving a man (as opposed to feeling helpless), and wanting to control a man are two entirely different concepts.
For instance, I need to feel in control in certain dating situations where my personal safety could be a factor. I always met dates in public places, bought my own drinks, never drank to excess, had my own transportation, and carried enough cash to cover the cost of the date, plus emergencies.
On the other hand, I have no desire to control or manipulate a man's behavior. I have never acted aloof to a man who interested me---neither did I expect the man to always "take charge". In fact, I was the one that first asked my current partner out for a drink. For our next date, he asked me out to dinner at his favorite restaurant. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/4/2012 5:07:42 PM | I think you're confused.
You want a relationship, but you want to date more than one (3 men) man? Otherwise, why would you care that they (all 3 of them) haven't asked you out?
You may need to figure out which one is your type, then zero in on him, rather than waiting for all three of them to waiste their time on you, not knowing that you are considering two other people besides (one) him.
I think they suspect that you are interested in more than one man, at the moment. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/5/2012 8:15:45 PM | Online if a guy asks a girl out to soon. She will stop speaking to him. Almost every time
in real life if he takes a while. He likes you and is nervous. The longer he takes the more he likes you and the more nervous he is
Take pity on these guys. Save them some heartache
ask them out first | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/6/2012 1:57:11 AM |
Some women will ONLY date a guy when they can feel in control... if he asks her, then she maintains her aloofness (rather than showing direct interest) and puts him in the position of "trying to win her over".
It's not about having an alpha male, it about being able to control the man you're with.
Sounds quite a bit like playing games to me, rather than genuinely getting to know someone and trying to find compatibility... | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/6/2012 2:04:04 AM |
it should give them a sense of security, protection, after all, Women are paranoid creatures like that and are attracted to Men who emit those traits.
No it doesn't , and no we're not. You seem to have a very odd view of what women like. You've mentioned using violence before, AGAINST women, how do thinkTHAT would make them feel secure? | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/31/2012 5:26:34 AM |
I would like to ask you out,but
it wont let me email you. So maybe alot of guys
have tried to send you email and it won't send.
That's a shame.
You should join the club... Or you could try becoming a Doctor/Lawyer. I hear that works well. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/31/2012 6:01:48 AM | I'm going to paraphrase what my friend Sandie says... if a man is too lazy...(to ask her out, etc.) then he's probably too lazy to be in a dynamic relationship.
I don't think it is that most women do not want to be the one who asks the man out, but rather, they want the man to put in an effort into the potential relationship.
OP, in your particular case, the men are intimidated by your very stunning appearance. You may have to set up 1st meets, perhaps indirectly, & then see who steps up after you've met! Otherwise, all you'll get are players, who don't really want a relationship, but just sex. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/31/2012 6:30:45 AM | Some possible reasons.
1. They are afraid of rejection.
2. They are looking for an email buddy.
3. They have better options and you are their backup option.
4. They like to spend some time getting to know someone by email / phone before asking them out.
>Yes I know, I could ask THEM out, this isnt the 1950's etc etc, but Im being totally honest when I say that women are given the message that we shouldnt do it as it emasculates men and makes us look desperate. And also I am old-fashioned in that sense that I like the man to be the one doing the asking.
Asking a man out does NOT make a woman looks desperate. A woman that is "old fashioned" and "passive" could lose out on a potential match to a woman that was more aggressive and was willing to ask a man out. | |
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| Why does it take men so long to ask for a date?
Posted: 8/31/2012 8:22:09 AM | | Just over a week? is that to long? whats the rush? Good grief slow ya roll there rock star. If you cant wait just ask them out... I havent even made up my mind if I want to date or even meet a chick after only a week of emails. Its emails, not like you work together, or hang out at the same book store.. | |
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