| | Can you have strong feelings for someone just by messaging etcPage 3 of 3 (1, 2, 3) |
Sorry to hear it didn't go well. I'd say give him one more chance, sometimes things come up and people have to cancel. If you like him then it's not worth giving up yet is it.
Are you for real? He was the one that gave up on her by not turning up. He never bothered to ring her to let her know he wasn't turning up and left the OP feeling dejected and miserable.... and you're suggesting she gives him another chance? I guess it's true that some men really are from Mars!
From what the OP said... it sounds like this man invested far too many emotions and feelings into meeting the OP and he couldn't follow through because he was afraid of bursting the bubble of the image he had created in his mind... or he is married. Either way, he doesn't strike me as being emotionally available and so I think the OP had a lucky escape. | |
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| Can you have strong feelings for someone just by messaging etc
Posted: 8/3/2012 4:32:16 AM | | Agree with indigovelvet I'm afraid............I had this happen to me a few months ago. He did get back in contact and said his mother had died. I gave him a second chance and he stood me up again. I eventually found out that he had a girlfriend and wanted me as his mistress!!! Bloody cheek of him!! I'll never understand why people have to lie, they always get found out in the end. I'd say you've had a lucky escape lovelife888...................I could be wrong tho.........who knows in this weird and wonderful world of online dating. What's the saying.....the odds are good but the goods are odd!! Lol | |
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| Can you have strong feelings for someone just by messaging etc
Posted: 8/3/2012 4:55:24 AM | oh gosh i am sorry, that must have been awful for you, especially after all your expectations. however, sometimes experiencing the worst is better than the whimper of a good time, and yes, you can count yourself lucky.
with regards to speaking and texting and feeling a strong connection, of course it is true, so please dont feel too foolish. you are exhibiting a natural human response to interaction, and in many ways the interaction of emailing and phoning reveals more about a person than their actual presence - just here it didnt reveal enough to measure sincerity.
maybe i should say that perhaps the stronger the feelings the harder it is to meet each other, lest that gaudy bubble bursts spectacularly in your face.
i do hope that you feel better soon
good luck
caroline | |
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| Can you have strong feelings for someone just by messaging etc
Posted: 8/3/2012 4:57:52 AM | Sorry to hear of your disappointrment put it down to online experiences... totally his loss! You're a good looking woman so don't go letting this effect your confidence there are as they say plenty more fish in the sea!
I once got very strong feelings for a guy I used to chat to online, not on POF I hasten to add. Everytime he came online my heart skipped a beat and I found him extremely attractive as we used to see each other on webcam. He was Turkish and on business in Russia and would chat to me in the evenings from his hotel room. It was a crazy time but seemed very romantic and I was lost in the moment. It wasn't a sex thing, we would just talk and look at each other and there would be a nice silence at times. I guess he was lost in the moment too. I had to fall back to earth when he returned to Turkey as I guess I was foolishly taken in by the things he told me about his situation. I still think about him from time to time and do still smile at the crazy feelings one can get just by talking online. I am a little older a little more wiser now.
ps Don't fall for the 'I lost my phone' excuse... I wouldn't give him a second chance if he asked for it. I have heard all the excuses under the sun I won't give anyone another chance if they didn't have the courtesy to call or text to save you getting ready and waiting around for them to show up! | |
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| Can you have strong feelings for someone just by messaging etc
Posted: 8/3/2012 8:07:29 AM | Update:
Firstly want to thank you all for everything you have said and i have taken it all on board and thought most of it myself.
He did contact me the day after and surprise surprise he has a girlfriend who apparently suspected something and confronted him they had a blazing row, that shouldnt have stopped him from contacting me though a simple text saying sorry cant make it would have done, so back to square one brushed myself down and ready to start again thank you again | |
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| Can you have strong feelings for someone just by messaging etc
Posted: 8/3/2012 8:43:54 AM | Good to see and hear you're ok, my reactions to reading what you wrote were the following:
1. You look fantastic on your pics and sound great; you will not be short of DECENT admirers very soon
2. However hurt you are.. and I know you are.. imagine being the b******'s poor girlfriend. At least you've only have a few weeks of his lies and cr**. I'm not meaning this in any "don't feel sorry for yourself" way. I'd rather be on my own for ever than end up in her shoes.
Good luck chuck xxx | |
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| Can you have strong feelings for someone just by messaging etc
Posted: 8/3/2012 11:24:58 AM | Ouch. Tough luck OP, sounds like you had a lucky escape in the end.
In regards to the original post I don't think it's possible to have strong feelings for somebody after a few weeks of written contact. Months/years? Sure. Written text can often be better indicator of personality than how somebody conducts themselves in real life, and it's very much possible to fall in love with a personality. Ultimately when/if you meet them the physical attraction has to be there too, though, or it probably won't work. | |
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