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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/29/2005 4:42:43 PM | | the year that I got divorced, I checked off the "divorced" box on all my government and tax forms, simply because my marital status had actually changed during that particular year. Every year since, however, I've just put "single". Although, lol, since the marriage didn't last that long overall, I wonder if they should maybe create a new box for annulments, lol | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/29/2005 4:56:55 PM | I don't see why someone should interpret the label "divorced" as having a negative connotation, i.e. failure, any more than the label "single" would do the same. If single implies never married, I'm getting to the point now where I think never being married by now is a failure. Really, it works like that. Someone is much more likely to think, "Gee, 37 and never married? What's his problem?" Nobody would think suspiciously of me if I was single through divorce.
So, to the OP, take your perceived injustices and celebrate. | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/29/2005 5:40:18 PM | ^^ way up there and back a page ^^ Indi - you WERE single - ya asked me to marry you the other night and ahm a holdin ya to it!  | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/29/2005 6:54:23 PM | ^^  " indigo rose" ..it seems like there ought to be
some kind of Statute Of Limitations as you said
i'm at 26 yrs and i'm thinking about talking to the guinness record guys to see how mush longer i need to go or if i made it yet-- | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/29/2005 7:43:02 PM | OK..after initially reading this thread, I figured I may very well change my status to "single". In the end there will always be a negative stigma with the term divorced..especially on a dating site such as this.
then after I read laverboy's comment...I began to agree with his line of thinking as well
So whats ole Manny to do? Perhaps change my status to single since I am still young enough to not fall into that "Old guy but still single?" category. Then in 5 or so years if I am still single I can change it back to divorced. Then I will be a seasoned vet.
I'm just not in the mood to change it right now though | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/29/2005 7:51:15 PM | | Being single sucks, being divorced sucks worse. Thats my 2 cents. | |
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ksue44
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Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 33 | |
| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/29/2005 8:10:23 PM | I agree. The status even mentions widowed. Why not keep it simple and say: "married" or "Single". Nope, its gotta get complicated.
In the dating arena, there is a big difference in: single (never married); divorced; and widowed. | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/29/2005 10:36:28 PM | | I don't mind divorced. Shows some experience and growth. | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/29/2005 11:05:22 PM | Kind of reminds me of the terms non smoker vs. ex smoker. If you don't smoke, but used to...like....10 years ago, are you an ex smoker, or a non smoker? Some would say that "non smoker" implies that you've NEVER smoked. Seriously, how many of us can actually say that? Those drags I was taking at the bar during college....does that make me an ex smoker? Or am I a non smoker?
Maybe I'm an ex non smoker? Or would that imply that I currently smoke?
Good thing the government doesn't ask me to fill out THAT report!!! | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 12:04:55 AM | Single is single. Married is married. Divorced is divorced. Live with someone and you are common law, which they concider you to be married. If you break up with your common law signifigant other, are you divorced or single?
I don't mind being referred to as divorced ( as in fact I was really married). Just cause I am though, doesn't mean it was my fault that things didn't work out. Also doesn't mean I am in any hurry ( if EVER) to be married again. At least going through marriage/divorce you become a little more wiser of life's lessons. | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 1:25:53 AM | | I guess because it shows you were committed at one time and something just screwed up! | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 4:02:57 AM | It goes to precision and accuracy in language.
Single = never married.
Divorced = Married + it didn't work out + lawyers + court + an ex (and maybe kids).
See the difference?
It's kinda like the difference between a natural-born woman and a guy that had some alterations done at the shop.
They might **think** they're the same -- but they ain't.
If someone told me that they were single and then I later found out they were actually divorced, I would consider that deception.
It just boils down to truth in advertising is all.
Sorry it makes you feel bad, 'cause you know I luv ya girl. | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 4:07:26 AM | | I'm going to change my profile now, I am SINGLE damn it!! | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 4:53:12 AM | but see, single could ALSO mean kids. (ie. myself) Single, one child.
That's what my student loan stipulates anyhow, single with dependent......
As for Mr.Right4Sum1's question about common law.....good one!
I was common law once, but after we parted ways, I became 'single' again. Go figure.
See? The wedding dress, cake and gifts, really *must* mean something lol! | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 5:08:14 AM | | Should only be Divorced until the legal action is over. Then, resume Single. | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 5:17:38 AM | ^^ But you are NOT divorced until the legal action is over - you're still married^^
Maybe it's like AA - Once you're an alcoholic - you're ALWAYS an alcoholic - you're just in recovery.
Maybe instead of Divorced - our title should be 'Recovering From Marriage' | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 5:19:44 AM | I agree with pinballdoctor and laverboy. Being single does suck.....being divorced is alot worse! But like laverboy said, alot of people do wonder....maybe not out loud......"what is wrong with that person, to have never been married?"....I think it's just a title thing which makes no sense at all, because in the long run we are single again!  | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 5:45:54 AM | When I was commonlaw, I was that down on Gov. papers.,
when I was seperated for the first couple of years I was that down on Gov. papers, which I had to confirm every year at tax time,
when I tried to go back to being single on those same Gov. papers, it seemed like it was a big deal to them, and I had to fill out paperwork again. But, I'm officially Single in the eyes of the Gov.....at least.
Nothing is simple anymore. | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 6:04:34 AM | Find something else to worry about, who the hell cares, sheesh, and we wonder why the world is in the crapper, if more people worried about the important things, kids, the quality of life, the future, we would be in far better shape.
But no, we worry about titles, and who is calling us what, and why we cannot pick up on the net, and why don't we get emailed back, shit, and why was I read and deleted.
Who cares!
Look around you, see the blight, the pain, the death in Iraq, the decline of education, the loss of our basic civil rights, and take action.
No, let's go watch Fear Factor, or Who Wants To Be A Hilton, or Dr Phil, and hide, only thinking about stupid shit like this!
No wonder the world sucks!
OMG am I gonna miss the new episode of the OC tonight?
Get off your ass and make a difference, in the big picture, does this really matter?
No it does not, but since most people are so self absorbed, and want to whine about titles, divorced, single, etc, nothing will change.
Those who see wrong, and who have the ability to take action, have the responsibility to take action!
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 6:15:32 AM | Thanks, this stupid shit just pisses me off.
There are so many more important things to worry about, and nobody cares!
Until that changes, grave times are ahead for us, I fear! | |
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| Single vs. Divorced
Posted: 7/30/2005 6:22:01 AM | | It's not that people don't care about what else is going on in the world. I'm sure that they do, but sometimes it's the little things that really bother them. And, we as humans should be there for them, to listen to them voice their concerns. No matter how big or how little. | |
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