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| | Nice guys finish last.Page 4 of 10 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10) | | Keep on Trucking Pablo...it is all any of Us can do,,,,, Man/Woman...Good luck Man.... | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/6/2005 9:20:06 AM | | Nice guys don't finish last... they are just barking up the wrong trees...lol | |
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Nobody
| | Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 78 | |
| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/6/2005 3:28:52 PM | | Go back and listen to the mystic lizard... He hit the nail on the head. | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/6/2005 9:41:59 PM | | Hang in there reaper. There are ones like myself that are not a player. I truely am looking for a nice guy. Hope one day to find him but like the others say there is alot of players to bad they all could not just go away an let true people meet take care be smart. You will find one. One day at a time. | |
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ogre04
| | Joined: 7/14/2005
Msg: 80 | |
| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/7/2005 4:14:08 AM | okay heres my reply to this female ssee me as an ass reason being is im a prickim sick of the games and bullshit but i will tell you this feamles in genral are very indeciceive not ever knowing what they want say one thing mean another ........
i give them all a chance no matter how many hurt you one will find you or you will find her wich ever way it may happen and then she will make it worth all the pain you went through to find her ......................... but what do i know im old 26 | |
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ogre04
| | Joined: 7/14/2005
Msg: 81 | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 10:49:14 AM | Your SO right. You always here how women want to be treated like a "Lady", but when you finally find one that you feel is worth it, they treat you like CRAP!!
Unfortunatly,I now have developed the I don't care at all mentality. After being 8 months without a woman, I've found alot of other things to occupy my time to forget about them.  | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 11:35:56 AM | Nice guys can be just as hurtful........
I have been corresponding with a self-styled "nice guy" for 3 months, and have had 3 "dates", but mostly it remains an e-mail relationship. He said keep in touch and see where it goes. So I do. But on weekends I am still alone. And no, this is not a LDR, he lives 10 minutes from my house. I keep cutting slack, saying OK, he had bad experiences, he is afraid of commitment. But who am I kidding? Myself. Only problem is, somehow I have developed feelings for this guy.........When I stop writing, he writes to ask if everything is ok.
I tell him I stopped because I figured he was just being polite............but he doesn't seem to get it. I am afraid to lay it on the line.......
Oh yes, this is the first guy I ever contacted at one of these sites...........
Guess I should just kiss him off, eh?
SC  | |
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tjmac
| | Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 85 | |
| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 11:50:09 AM | Remember this is online dating, there are risks associated with it. Both woman and men play the game.....being a self proclaimed nice guy I feel we always finish last and not only in the dating world but also in the business world....another story for another time.
What I have learnt in my travels and experiences is be prepared, love is hard enough to find in the real world so expect bumps and bruises in the cyber world. I am not defending the players out there, far from it...they suck...lol, however we are each responsible for our own fate. I read one message and I apologise I don't remember who wrote it but it went along the lines that if it hasn't moved away from email or chat after a week or two move on....great advice. You wouldn't expect to meet a woman in a bar and keep meeting her there everyday for the next two weeks without progressing.
So for everyone out there, good and bad, be careful with your heart, you only get one, don't rush into anything, everything good comes to those who wait....or at least I keep telling myself that....lol
Stay safe, be honest and you will find your angel.....or ladies you will find your prince...he just got through writing this message........kidding, come on guys and gals smile for me, make someone's day.....
C ya... | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 1:53:22 PM | Hey there Sally,
I know how you feel. The one that wrote about was the first person I had contacted. And what she did to tore my heart out. But It's time to move on.If I have leared anything from this...Don't keep your feelings inside. It'll only hurt YOU more. Be honest with yourself and with him.Yes it may turn bad, but at least you'll know what's in his heart. Like the site says....plenty of fish. I'm not saying Kiss him off. Give him a chance and see what happens. Just be careful. Like the guy said, you only have ONE heart.If he doesn't accept what you have to offer..... He may not be the one for you. And believe me I know it might hurt. I'm still trying to get over what's her name. But With freinds I am moving on and still looking for that special some one. Be strong. | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 1:59:13 PM | | I don't feel sorry for anyone I just went through it 2 times with the same guy. But I came out the 2nd time a winner. I had him busted on the computer by someone. And kept everyword that was said. But to all the real men who finsh last your the best. And never let a woman tell you differnet. Some men want a 10 but find 5 and more happy. Games on the computer are played by both but at some point some get hurt and they learn. Only makes you a better person. | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 3:24:21 PM | To all you “nice guys” it time to change...read on!
I have a theory or definition of what a “nice guy” means.
The Nice Guy – He is someone who tolerates emotional manipulation by a woman. He always says “yes dear” even through he knows he is right. He aims to please; he tries to win her love by buying her gifts. He put on a happy face, no matter how much she disrespects him, and he keeps doing her favors. He tells her is deepest feelings, only to be used against him. He has something to say, but he is afraid to standup for himself, because if he does, he knows she well leave him. When she does leave him, he say he’s SORRY and then she treats him like the “nice guy” he is. The “nice guy” is program to do nice things for her approval and that is why nice guys finish last!
I believe high percent of nice guys fall into this category.
Woman are not attracted to men who give away their power, kiss up to them, smother them with attention, and act like whipped puppies dogs!
What we should be doing here on this form is how to be successful with women.
Well I guess I will go first...
I believe nice guys tolerates such abuse is because he feels that’s the only beautiful girl in the world he can get. I truly believe men have become so weaken by a women’s beauty that they lose their self-worth. I have seen so many of my friends fall victims to a women’s beauty, that I, just want to take them outside and b****-slap them! Then I would say “what the HELL are you doing...can’t see want she is doing you!” My friends and co-works have asked me, how may we overcome this situation? Well, I have learned long-ago if you take away a woman’s beauty from her, she has lost all POWER over you! My one friend says, “What the HELL are you talking about?” I say, “What do bad boys do to women that make them so appealing?” The bad boy takes away her beauty and self-worth. This is how he does it. When the girl he is dating ask him how she looks in her new outfit. He says, “It would look a lot better if you would lose few extra pounds”, even thought he knows it is not true. My friends says, GREAT I have to turn into and a**hole. I say...no, no, no look the only thing you have to do is stop complimenting them so much. When you stop complimenting them, you have in-turn taken away all their POWER over you.
Men we need to stop giving women so much power over us!
Wait...let me make something very clear before I continue. You NEVER, EVER, and NEVER, use this stuff in away to abuse women! So you can feel better about yourself!
Today’s women have so much power over us men. They have careers, their independent, and now they are OUR equals. Women say...they want men and women to be equals. However, who still pays for the dinner dates...men do. When the day comes that, a women will ask men out in a near 50/50 ratio...then we will be equals. Until that day comes, men must stay two steps a head of them. No, this is not a war between the sexist, but a FUN game of Chess...one who just outsmarted his opponent so he’s the one continuing to play the game. Remember guys, take away her POWER and you well be the one in CONTROL.
Oh, one more thing, date as many women as you can to find the one.
Nice guys don’t have to finish last, just take away the POWER! | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 4:03:25 PM | it happens to all of us. Me personaly i rather chat online for a while then phone then possible meet. I am in no rush either. You can feel a person out better i think in this way. She just wasnt being honest with you and that happens.. But its not only the good guys that finsh last the good ladys do too. We all get hit from time to time with the same crap.. I would say be glad you didnt meet her and be involed on a personal level as that ,, because the break would be worse then it is now. Count you blessings ,, and as my Mom used to stay ,, pull yourself up by your boot straps , dust your self off and move on.. There are plenty of good woman out here waiting for a nice guy in all the real sense of that word.. When you find each other this will all be water under the bridge ,, maybe she will be there with her troll LOL
good luck | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 4:09:20 PM | I had that happen to me! Some women are real ****ing ****es man. I don't feel sorry for you, but I DO feel bad for you. There's good guys like you & me, who WILL treat a woman good - & they SAY they want that, but when it comes down to brass taxes - DAMN few of them are honest enough to say what they want...let alone KNOW what they want. As for me, I'm seriously considering getting the **** OFF THIS WEBSITE! Nice guys don't ALWAYS finish last...but usually! KILL'EM ALL, & LET GOD SORT'EM OUT! But remember, guys are just as bad! Players(as they are called), give the good guys a bad name. They ruin all the GOOD women - what's more, they don't give a shit...just as long as THEY get THEIR ****...they don't give a shit.  | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 4:22:05 PM | | You are right on the money, Riveraojr! But most guys are afraid to do that(including me). We're too ****ing afraid that we're going to be perceived as Dr. Jeckyll & Mr. Hyde. Have to get over that shit! Also have to use it the right way as well! | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 4:44:36 PM | Gentlemen, I am sincerely humbled to be in the presence of such honesty and integrity. I see that it's true that misery and shared pain brings us together because up until I read this post, I was beginning to feel that I was the only nice guy left on POF and suspected I'd be the LAST guy on here as well. After being here a couple of years and seeing soooooo many profiles from women who preface everything with "not looking for liars, cheats, sex, axe murderers, etc", I was really questioning the value of other men here. What I have discovered tonight has made me a humble man and big enough to say to all of you that I am truely sorry for painting you all with the same brush. Agreed there are far too many guys here who are married and looking for a toy, but Jesus H., if that was such an issue, the why did Big Fish bother to create the "looking for activity partner' or "intimate encounter" requirements? Far too many women may poo poo those men, but I'll bet my left nut that half of them are steppin' out on their man regularly.
Good guys? Sheeeeit, I am SICK of being a nice guy, and to those other guys here who are honest enough to talk about it, my hat's off to you. I was raised to respect both men and women and to be a gentleman first and foremost, yet despite all the whining about all you bad boys here from the women, it's my experience they invariably pick you First and me Last. This is not speculation, it's experience. So, should any of you fine dudes care to offer me a crash course in Prick Education, I will make myself available. Like many of you, I have played the "sugar daddy", the "paycheck", the "handyman", the "babysitter", the "counsellor", and where did the effort get me? Broken, Broke and Single. I hope I haven't offended any of you guys cuz I actually admire the brass I'm seeing here...you have opened my eyes and I am grateful. Now, who's gonna find me a date??? | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 4:47:07 PM | Hey Reaper,
I'm sorry to hear that as well. Been there myself and it is not something that goes away that easily. I had met a guy on line and chatted with him everynight. He would e-mail me messages, gave me the attention I was looking for at the time. He kept wanting to meet, but said he would not push or rush me into anything. Finally the time came when I got the nerve up to meet him and guess what......he then told me he only ever wanted to make me smile and that he never had any intentions of any kind of relationship forming. **stard, he crushed me....it took me months to get over it. BUT I have found though....through the mistakes we make....they do not make us a bad person but in fact it makes us a stronger one. She WILL wake up one day and realize her loss. Remember that it is her loss. Keep your chin up and move forward do not look back. Yes communication is the key to any relationship, but like the others have said chat for a week or 2 then meet it's the only way!!!
I'll chat with you anytime!!! Keep smiling | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 5:01:17 PM | The problem with "nice guys" ( I was a local chapter president  ) is that they have no backbone.
A man should be a gentleman at all times, and treat a woman well - and with respect always.
There will be times, with some women, where they will try to push over your barrier. ( Men will do that to women too, this is just directed towards the men here at the moment) They will "see how far they can go". If they succeed, they will continue.
After a short time, they lose respect for you. When that happens, put the door mat T-shirt on - cause you are going to get walked over like the carpet at your local Holiday Inn.
Want to know why those "S.O.B.'S" are dating someone, and you are not ? It's because they go the other way, in a pre-emptive strike of sorts. They play the " nice girls" to a T. Those are the prey of the "players".
Do you want to be like them ? Take someone, and control them totally ? Disrespect them ? Maybe hit them once and a while ? You really want to live like that ? I certainly don't.
Then you are going to be like those ****es you complain about - except a male one.
You have to draw a line, and make sure it is respected. It starts at the very first meeting. You still keep all the good qualities you have, and add more.
The first time that line gets crossed, you let them know in a calm sensitive way that this is not happening. You don't yell, you don't scream, you don't even get mad.
You lay down the rules of the game.
It can be something as being late for a date , and not calling you to tell you. Most times it starts there. A nice guy will wait there for three hours, and act nice when the woman shows up.
I leave after fifteen minutes, and don't answer my voicemail until the next day. I make very sure to tell them that I have a life, and anyone that doesn't respect me enough to call to let me know they are late isn't going to be in my life for very long.
I don't care how pretty or amazing they are.
Nice guys don't know when to walk, and they wind up bitter and hurt and running because of it.
That is based on experience, and it works. | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 5:01:22 PM | | All nice guys go through this at some time. I sympathize with you. I have been dumpted on myself. | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/9/2005 5:13:01 PM | You LET yourself get dumped on, after the first "dump".
( I actually have a closet full of those T-shirts.)
You CHOOSE, or someone else does for you. | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/10/2005 5:38:16 AM | Keep your head up. Not all women play games. You will find who you are looking for, someday.  | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/10/2005 8:40:56 AM | | ya been there ok u not the only one some women love to trash u well alot do makes them think their great or something but what goes around comes around and nice guys finish last always will always have but shell fall hard for someone and hell hurt her believe me that happens all the time her prince bad guy will choose another and then its her turn but dont give in to her dont be the other pair of shoes u no the ones well if i cant have thoes shoes ill settal for these pairs | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/10/2005 8:55:13 AM | | Riveraojr~You hit the nail on the head there!!! I want a nice guy..However I want a guy with a backbone!!! Have your own opinion and state it!!! Don't be afraid of me! I have dated some really nice guys...The problem was they were just to nice!! They fell over backwards to always please me..I felt as though I had all this power over them and that's not a good feeling for me!! I want to be with a man that's the man in the relationship!! A guy can be a gentleman and nice and still not always saying "yes dear"!!! | |
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| Nice guys finish last.
Posted: 8/10/2005 9:55:07 AM | Thanks for the advice. I hope your experience doesn't turn you into someone out to "get" every other woman for what one did to you.
I don't want to have POWER over men. But equal? Sure. Of course, I don't make EQUAL money so I may not always have as much money..........but I am still quite fine with paying my share.
Maybe I have been away from the dating scene too long. It doesn't sound very pleasant I hope this is not another contest, war of the sexes thing that some of the responses make it sound like. Everyone deserves respect. EVERYONE.
And sometimes it is the NICE ladies who wait for hours for someone to show up or to call.
Been there, done that, but don't do it anymore.....
SallyCee | |
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