| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 11/18/2005 8:20:11 PM | My answer is yes. I have been told that I am a gentleman, and frankly I know its true. I was raised as one and always will be. An interesting thing that I found is that most women are quite surprised by a man acting this way, especially if it is someone younger like myself (24). I also think that morals are quite important, but frankly I do not know how many appraciate that either.
Otherwords have a nice day. | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 11/18/2005 11:14:12 PM | | Most definitely for sure!!!! Sad to say though as much as I'd like to believe chivalry/gentleman- like is important, many men don't seem to. I would value a chivalrous gentleman. There is really no other way to really impress me than to exibit these characteristics. | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 12/5/2005 10:29:30 PM | OMG YEAH! Nothing irks me more than men who refuse to give up their seats at a crowded bus. But then again, some men will argue, " Well, that's what the feminists did for you women! ". I would object by saying, " How about the basic human element of courtesy and politeness?"
So, yeah, when a man mentions the words " chivalry ", I get very excited knowing that there are still men out there who truly believe in it. | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 12/15/2007 3:39:31 PM |
So, yeah, when a man mentions the words " chivalry ", I get very excited knowing that there are still men out there who truly believe in it.
I think we lost a thread due to redundancy, so here comes one from 2005!
.......resurrected to see if anyone cares whether or not a man should hold a door open, slide a chair back or help us with our coat.
I say YIPPEE and "Yes please!"
This one's for you Knight!
bullie
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 12/15/2007 6:15:29 PM | I still believe in behaving like this.....which is surprising because I was never raised to be "chivalrous". I just always wanted to be different, stand out....not be seen as "just another typical guy". I open doors, hold chairs, bring flowers.....the whole 9 yards.
What I still find surprising is that some people actually get a little offended or even hostile when you do so.....getting all riled up about common courtesy being extended to them. I know it is just because they have never had it, but being a gentleman can often times be a double edged sword.
Onse side visited by people who are amazed that people still hold old fashioned values dear to them while the other side is habitated by those who view it as a slight or insult to them, asking if you think they can't do things for themselves and such...which it isn't about.
As for me.....I will NEVER compromise on my values or beliefs to treat a woman as they used to be treated....and revered and cherished ladies whom deserve to be treated with care.  | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 12/15/2007 6:28:18 PM | I didn't read all 4 pages, but my thoughts are this: I don't think doors need to be opened at all times, leading us into rooms, ordering food for us (which I really dislike anyway). These things are nice in small doses, but it can lead to overkill.
I'd settle for some honest to goodness respect for my feelings and who I am as a woman over getting my door held open for me by someone who regards me as less than a lady behind the door. I think that'd do it for me anyday. | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 12/15/2007 6:54:40 PM | I act polite naturally, but I'm not sure if there's still a place for "chivalry" in the traditional sense in modern society.
I mean, seriously, it'd be a bit creepy if I opened every door and acted like Captain Doormat for every girl I met. :P | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 12/15/2007 7:58:11 PM | I love to be with a man with manners, one that holds the car door open and shuts it; one that knows how to hold a door open, walks in front and grabs the door to open it by standing back, not by holding his arm up over your head for you to walk under or someone that lets go of it the minute you get to the door expecting you to realize they are letting go and you have to grab it suddenly; holding and pushing in my chair when I sit; holding my coat when I am struggling to get the second arm in; I even like it when I tell a guy my order and he tells the waitress for me.
I miss all of it!
I am trying to teach my boys right and they are doing pretty well.
Oh, the hand kissing I don't like. I don't know if that is a germaphobia thing. I have dry skin, like most true red heads, and always am putting lotion on my hands. I don't kiss on the first date either. I guess some people don't like to even shake hands any more. But they do say your mouth does have more germs than your hands carry.
I do love a true gentleman, my ex is 58, maybe it is an age thing. I haven't dated anyone that age, only younger men and none did it all. Some were good with the car door, but after that most fell short.
Please don't get me wrong I love it, but really am shocked when it happens any more. I don't expect it and am sure tons of guys think it is too much of a pain to do it all. Major kudos to those that do. | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 12/15/2007 8:03:50 PM | I think chivalry goes much farther than opening doors. It's about a great many things. Attitudes, morals, principles...it's a way of life...not just remembering a few token acts here and there. It runs to the core of a man when he is authentically chivalrous.
Defenition:
"The qualities idealized by knighthood, such as bravery, courtesy, honor, and gallantry toward women."
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 12/15/2007 8:16:16 PM | Here's a good read about modern chivalry: Talk about going beyond opening doors!
There were, however, several common themes found in these lists of knightly virtues. By combining these, we have created what we consider to be the seven knightly virtues of the modern code of chivalry:
Courage
More than bravado or bluster, today’s knight in shining armor must have the courage of the heart necessary to undertake tasks which are difficult, tedious or unglamorous, and to graciously accept the sacrifices involved.
Justice
A knight in shining armor holds him- or herself to the highest standard of behavior, and knows that “fudging” on the little rules weakens the fabric of society for everyone.
Mercy
Words and attitudes can be painful weapons in the modern world, which is why a knight in shining armor exercises mercy in his or her dealings with others, creating a sense of peace and community, rather than engendering hostility and antagonism.
Generosity
Sharing what’s valuable in life means not just giving away material goods, but also time, attention, wisdom and energy — the things that create a strong, rich and diverse community.
Faith
In the code of chivalry, “faith” means trust and integrity, and a knight in shining armor is always faithful to his or her promises, no matter how big or small they may be.
Nobility
Although this word is sometimes confused with “entitlement” or “snobbishness,” in the code of chivalry it conveys the importance of upholding one’s convictions at all times, especially when no one else is watching.
Hope
More than just a safety net in times of tragedy, hope is present every day in a modern knight’s positive outlook and cheerful demeanor — the shining armor that shields him or her, and inspires people all around.
Each of these concepts is important in itself, and every one of these virtues is an admirable quality, but when all of them blend together in one person, we discover the value, and power, of chivalry today. Modern-day knights should strive to keep these virtues alive in their own hearts, but, perhaps more importantly, they should work to bring these wonderful qualities out in the people they see every day — at home, in the office, at school or on the street corner. A person who lives by the code of chivalry in today’s world allows everyone to see their best qualities reflected in his or her shining armor. | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 12/15/2007 11:08:41 PM | | Interesting. I am a person who loves chivalry and good manners and consider myself an exceptionally polite person who tries very hard to be considerate (and yes, I'll let a man open a door for me, and I'll say thank you). Yet I don't believe that emails on dating sites should be replied to if the person being written is not interested. I am fine with a no answer if I were to write an email to a man. That man never asked me to write them an email. I chose to do that, to express my interest. If they are not interested back, I would find it rude of myself to require them to write when I was not invited (I mean personally. an open ad is not the same thing) to write them in the first place. The fact that they do not reply back quickly is enough indication to me that they are not interested - it's pretty crystal clear to me, and no biggie. I prefer no answer to a tactless answer that detailed why I am unattractive to them. I actually find no answer to also be clearer than those who write back just to be polite and even go as far as arranging MSN chatting or even a date to just be polite when they aren't really all that interested. That's just confusing. Just don't write back at all and let everyone move on. LOL. | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 1/6/2008 6:00:56 PM | I definaltly love gentlemen, my father had always said a real man is a gentlemen so when I go out with someone even though I'm not fishing for a guy to open the door etc, I definalty do give pointers and notive the ones that actually do, yes men need to be gentlemen!! | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 1/6/2008 10:03:55 PM | Being a gentleman is yes.
But if you kissed my hand....Wait you wouldnt get to that point....
Thats a bit too much, and a bit too weird...
When men last did that (Rarely I might add) they Kissed the air above the hand....Not the hand itself.
Stick to holding doors....everything else is pretensiuous in the 21st century. | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 1/7/2008 2:25:21 PM | It's on the top of my list. It works both ways though and shows respect for your partner. Makes you feel like the person really cares about you.
Please never lose it. Your parents taught you right. | |
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| is gentlemanly behavior and chivalry still important?
Posted: 1/7/2008 2:39:57 PM | Desert Serenade you sound most lovely!
I think chivalry is mighty important, although i have this feeling that it got missed out of the last few editions of the Dictionary!
Now, don't get me wrong, over the years i have met a few men who have been nothing but polite, charming and and great company, but these have been few and far between! I think it is important to treat someone the way you would want to be treated. It works both ways. I have always tended to go for the older gentleman as i think subconciously they would be more chivalrous and interesting. (Am still looking for Mr Right, so i obviously know how to pick em!!)  | |
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