| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/11/2005 1:45:23 PM | Equal rights folks...
If a man has the right to walk away and have a life of his own without the kids or any contact with them...a woman have the same right and the same value judgement assigned to her.
But I can assure you , a deadbeat mom will be judged much more harshly than a deadbeat dad will.
It's just the "expectation" that society has placed on women.
Dad's do it all the time...women, still pretty rarely.
I wonder how much child support arrears are owed by deadbeat dads vs. deadbeat moms?
Just curious is all. | |
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geohat
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Joined: 7/13/2005
Msg: 27 | |
| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/11/2005 1:53:08 PM | that last study conducted was in May of 2004. Dads owe about two billion dollars, women owe around 1.5 billion dollars. 
However, in 6 months, the women will owe more child support than men 
This information is brought to you by Single Fathers of America! | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/11/2005 2:04:00 PM | | LMAO ya but all the single Dad's i know actually went through the system to get financial support from their deadbeats... none of the moms i know have .... a lot of us find it more of a hassle to make the futile attempt to get financial support .. I myself actually took pride in the thought that i raise my kids without financial support of their dad.. | |
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geohat
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Joined: 7/13/2005
Msg: 30 | |
| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/11/2005 2:12:06 PM | You can see this study and many more from www.singlefathersofamerica.com
dirtymetalgirl
Like your pics.  
But, the reason why us males are able to take the women to court is, we had to put up with your shiznit for so long, we should be compensated.
The reason why women cannot find the man may be a few reasons;
1) one night stand and he gave a wrong number or she forget his name
2)She slept with too many guys, she doesnt know who to pick 
3) he got tired of her pregnancy woes, he bailed like a looser
I take my hats off to all single parents, but you have to admit, its about time millions of dads are stepping up to raise their kids! | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/11/2005 2:17:12 PM | Glad they are for sure..
But that's a pretty sad classification to lump me or the majority of woman in with. I got married too young & had 2 beautiful children, & yes i know exactly where he is (in my house) I left because of addiction problems & cared more for my children being away from a bad situation... It's ***holes with opinions like the ones you stated above why a lot of women do not date single dad's | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/11/2005 2:20:21 PM | | Why tie up the courts chasing after the morons you got involved with when it's your responsibility??? Theyre children not a pay cheque or a revenge weapon | |
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geohat
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Joined: 7/13/2005
Msg: 33 | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/11/2005 6:57:56 PM | Hows this for accountability and responsibility-
At 12 yrs of age, my son decided he wanted to try to live at his dad's now. So, the tables have turned. i am now voluntarily (SP) paying him back the $650.00 per month. - might loose the car over it, but that's where he wants to live. It's only fair that I pay them. I know what it cost's to raise him.
As for walking away from him? Never! Trust me, there are a few times I have thought... boy would my life be diffeent. But, I think most parents go through that. He is not here now and I miss him. | |
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geohat
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Joined: 7/13/2005
Msg: 35 | |
| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/11/2005 7:40:50 PM | Blondie - I truly am sorry with what you are currently going thru and I do not support all men custody battles. But I ask you if this is not too personal....
What made your son come to this conclusion to live at his dad's house?
Was his dad always apart of his life?
Did you take it to court, why or why not?
WOW, you are just paying way to much a month and you need to fight and get that dollar amount lowered considerably less. No reason for you to loose your only means of transportation. I was only able to recieve $300 a month for child support. Mind you, I havent yet to receive any payment for over 2 1/2 years now. The reason for me going to court is that the amount increases to thousands of dollars. If I dont get the money fine. Eventually, if I do get the money its just additional funds for his college.
As for parents walking away, usually it tends to be when the child is at a very young age. Certainly not a 12 year old. Again, best of luck and please do something about it.
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/11/2005 7:54:19 PM | | Ditto, support payments that go through court are based on what the court deems appropriate and realistic. Now, mind you if you drive a Porsche they will have no simpathy LOL! But, somehow I doubt thats the case. I'm a firm believer that these arrangements should always go through court whether the two parties agree on things or not. A third party opinion is best. Good luck, and BTW I think your 12 yr old is just at the age to experiment and will prob realize it's better to be home with you. | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 8:19:17 AM | Yes,
I know a couple my sons mom infact she calls intermitently she sees him at her convenienceshe will not drive out of her way to get him she will not come to his school unless I ask when she came she just sat there with no input . she is the invisible mom.My son has a name for her the liar came up withthat by himself.She is a supposed victim of abuse when she was kid so does that give her an out ?I think she just doesn't know how to be a mom,it all comes backto how we are raised I think! anyhoo enjoyed the chatter and to all the single parents (the good ones ) huzzah keep up hthe work and give the kids the best you can | |
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Happÿ
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Joined: 12/19/2004
Msg: 38 | |
| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 8:45:15 AM | blondie - did you go through the court to decide what you should be paying? There are guidelines for this and if you are about to lose your car then maybe you are paying too much of your income.
i am now voluntarily (SP) paying him back the $650.00 per month. | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 9:33:18 AM | I never realized that there was mom's out there that could do that to their children. Bravo to the men who have stepped up to the plate.
As fas as abadment issues go, My mom and her husband split after 15years and three kids. He has not paid any child support and is only in their lives when he chooses to be. These kids are 14, 12, and 10.
I am myself got pregnant, New years eve, got taken advantage of. I ended up pregnant and he has never done anything to help me or see his child. Funny thing is that there is a child support order and a custody agreement in place has been for years.
My sister went through the same thing with her first child. She got pregnant he left her and still has never seen his child. He is 10 years old now. I am unsure if she gets child support but somehow I doubt it.
Reading this forum has made me realize that butt heads come in all shapes and sizes. Thanks for the eye opener guys!
Best of Luck!
Melissa
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 10:04:10 AM | | Let me tell you!!! I am a child of a deadbeat mom...She left me and my brother..for 8 years! I never heard from her, no card, no call....nothing. I finally asked my step mom to find her...She eventually came around...I fight with those demons everyday because now I have three of my own and guess what...their father owes...11,000 dollars in child suport...How's that for fatherly love ...He has called DSS on me and is just a geniune ass when he does actually see them...once every few months...I vowed to never let my kids ever feel the loneliness...or rejection...If it wasn't for my daddy, who I can't thank enough, My brother and I would be another statistic....I look into my childrens eyes and see...the future that i will be apart of...no matter what or who comes into our lives... | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 11:35:55 AM | I actually know worse moms. ONes who do not only do nothing for their kids..but..
take it into negatives. (No recent examples to give though) | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 11:46:38 AM | I didn't realize that after I moved in with my father (at the age of 13) that my Mother never paid a stitch of child support. I actually didn't realize that until just now.......wow....
Kudo's to my Dad for never letting me 'in' on that aspect of things.....In his opinion, he was just happy that I was there, as was I..... | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 11:49:06 AM | I find that beautiful of your dad. He let you come to conclusions and such yourself..and, simply, kept on keeping on and making suire you were loved and well of mind..and heart..and soul.
Man...that man deserves a hug! | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 12:02:32 PM | | there are a lot of 'things' that I could tell my kids about their mother that would serve no useful purpose in their lives right now. They love her, and they deserve that. Someday, on their own, they will understand ... | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 2:19:12 PM | @geohat and happy-
My son has lived with me since he was 3yrs and does not remember ever living with his dad. I guess he feels it is time to have men around. He lives with me and my mom. I have not had a relationship in 9 yrs and he knows that if I did have a relationship, I would not bring the guy home until I was serious. ( I have freinds who are always brining another man home- that is not what I want to model for my son).
I did not go to court. He is free to make his decision. My ex was abusive to me and I was the same right back to him. It was a very bad situation. He is re- married with a 1 1/2 yr old now. I see that he has really calmed down. I am not a fool, I know the violence is still in him, but not to our son.
I guess I feel that I have raised my son properly thus far and trust his judgement at this point. If he decides to come home, he knows the door is open. My parents were married for 41 yrs until my dad died. My ex had his parents fighting over him and making him feel guilty when they divorced. I don't want that for Mike ( my son).
As for the payments, My ex still has it coming off his cheque into my account. I am returning it to him plus the same ammount he paid me ( We have the same income). I did not go to court to change this as for now, we are waiting to see if it is a permanent
situation or not. We are playing it by ear. | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 6:28:03 PM | Are you nuts?!! I have a son myself and I love him to death. I don't know a single deadbeat mom it's the FATHERS who SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My son wouldn't know what do without me, he could care less about his father, doesn't even know the difference between him and any other man. | |
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danbfl
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Joined: 7/21/2005
Msg: 47 | |
| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 7:24:13 PM | I can introduce you to one hotblonde mama, It's not just the fathers that suck, get your head out of your a$$. My childrens mom doesn't give a damn about them so do some research before posting a comment like that  | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 8:03:11 PM | We're all grown ups sheesh theres good parents & bad parents male female & of all races. Same as any other criminal....We've created an equal society so therefore tis something we all (yes even us gals must accept).... The rate of single Dad's is on the rise which is good.. Theres ALWAYS been mom's that abandon their children. Fortunately a few more Dad's are stepping up to the plate instead of just dumping them all in group/foster care like the majority used to...& yes even forming groups to women bash ...lmao It's very acceptable for any one gay str8 , male or female to be loving parent.... Why not all quit ****in & pointing the finger / getting our backs up / trudging up the worst scenario's & just be the best flippin parent possible??
(yikes can u say run on sentence) | |
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 8:08:57 PM | My ex walked out when my kids were 1 and 4, its been almost five years and they are the ones with the hurt.
There are plenty of deadbeats out there of both sexs, I dont get it, how vcan you have a part of you that you dont give a damn about?
in the end its the kids that hurt the worst.
But we get to pick up the pieces along the way.
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| HOW MANY DEADBEAT MOMS DO YOU KNOW?!
Posted: 8/12/2005 9:06:05 PM | | hey danbfl your all talking shit about mothers and all that and as far as i'm concerned my comment was not out of line i'll post what i want and who gives a damn about research you couldn't know how accurate it actually is...there are a lot of mothers i know that don't have the time or money to take dead beat fathers to court i know i don't and honestly i'd rather have a father for my son not his money...:mad: any woman who doesn't care for her child doesn't deserve the right to be called a mother...a mother would never leave her child...and that's a fact and you can't research that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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