|
|
|
|
|
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/15/2004 3:20:16 AM | You poor thing Georgie. It breaks my heart just reading it. I've read many of your posts and regard you as one of the "pillars of the community". It almost feels like a crime has been committed, a sort of injustice. I'm so sorry!
I know anything we say cannot assuage your pain, but know that many of us can empathize with your plight.
Chin up Sweet pea. | |
|
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/15/2004 5:33:38 AM | Georgie,
Maybe I missed something in all of this, but and i can only assume that you met Don here at fish. This place is something like a chat community, some people are really close, some not, some know you better than others, so in my mind that makes you pretty well an all around person. If I were you I wouldn't be blaming myself, at one time in all of our lives, we are overcome by the need to express our loves and in your case you chose this guy Don. Sadly it didn't work out, sadly for you, after holding out for all those years for that one special man to come your way, he comes dragging excess baggage from his old relationship which he never truly left.
From what you say in your postings in this thread, you weren't dating a man, you were dating an over-grown boy who can't get his sh*t together and while I can feel your pain in the words that I read in your letters to him, you are a way better off without this guy in your life. It hurts to feel betrayed, it would have hurt even more had this of been a six month relationship and he was seeing his ex on the side, at least you got a grip on the situtation before your heart was broken worse than it is now. We are all human, we all have our wants and needs and there isn't one person on this Message Board who at one time or another hasn't gone through what you are feeling now. The thing that I hope you keep in mind is that all of these people seem to be your friends, let them and their words of encouragement help you through this mess as I am sure they truly feel for you, and the heart break you are now suffering.
Good luck,
mysticalman4u | |
|
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/15/2004 6:40:28 AM | Mystical, I would never have posted what I wrote to Don on this site had I met him here. I have much more class than that. We met through a different way. He has no clue about this website and is computer illiterate. I would never air the laundry of a relationship found here in such a way as I have. That would be so uncool and such dirty play.
The words of encouragement are helping tremendously. You guys are the greatest.
At least I have my answer now. Now I can heal and move on. | |
|
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/15/2004 8:51:42 AM | Well, if that doesn’t kick my heart up my throat to have him treat me like this! Don just dropped by to return the last of my belongings. He hid behind sunglasses, wouldn’t look at me, tossed my things in my door, and walked away. I said to his retreating back, “Farewell, Don. Good Luck and Happiness. But I didn’t expect this from you.” He said back, “I didn’t either.”
That was it. If there was, anything to get me back on track today it was to be treated as if I’d done something wrong to him rather than the other way around. Its done, finished, over. What I felt is now in the past, and life is going to go on.
I’m so lucky. I have such a great life, a wonderful home, good friends, I’m content in my place in this world and my writing keeps me very busy and satisfied. I like who I am and what I stand for, and this has just reconfirmed look well before you leap. Lesson learned. Thanks for all the support and good wishes. | |
|
Ruby_
|
Joined: 7/10/2004
Msg: 55 | |
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/15/2004 1:17:47 PM |
Well, I have my answer. I listened to the people of this forum who told me that being old fashioned and making sure I took the time to get to know and trust the man before allowing my emotions to get the best of me or to allow sex into a relationship early and guess what—I should have stuck to my old fashioned morals, values, and plan.
So you are blaming us that you gave that man your heart and soul in less than two weeks.
I know I said the sparks of chemistry for sex can happen very quickly. I didn't say anything about a deep loving relationship, that takes time.
If I was with a man that started to booze it up because his ex didn't want anything more to do with him, I would have collected my stuff and left.so fast the wind tunnel would have sucked the alcohol right out of the bottle and followed me through the door.
That being said I do feel bad for you that your heart got broken. Emotional pain is the worst. | |
|
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/15/2004 2:21:53 PM | | Thanks, Ruby. No, I blame no one here. I just got thinking, maybe I was just a bit too old fashioned, and decided Don was worth putting it all on the line. No one made me do what I did, I'm a big girl now and take responsibility for my own actions. The posts got me thinking is all, I'm not sorry I did what I did, I was very happy and in love if only for a few brief weeks. No regrets, but wiser now. | |
|
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/16/2004 12:11:42 PM | Well.... I never! Don showed up today, hanging his head, all sorry and sad, and said, "I want another try with you!" This is after his confessed sex fest with the x he dumped me for Saturday morning. I told him flat out, "I was the best thing that ever happened to you, but I'm not a meat market, Don. Go find someone else to play games with, I'm not interested in the least."
Actually he looked like crap, as if he'd spent the majority of the last three days getting pissed drunk. I had concerns about his drinking early last week, and looking at him today only confirmed to me, as his breath was pure whiskey, that he has a problem with more that just making smart decisions.
If anything, today's visit put the final cap on getting over Don in my heart. Why do men think they can dump you for an x, screw her brains out for three days, then think the one they dumped is into leftovers when it doesn't work out? I just don't get it. | |
|
hk165
|
Joined: 11/14/2004
Msg: 58 | |
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/16/2004 2:24:02 PM | Georgie,
I know that you are hurting but this guy is not worth the effort. If you have the slightest idea of him cheating that is a sign that he wont ever change. However i know what its like to find out the love of your life is cheating. It was the cause of my divorce. The way I got proof is by a little program called a Key stroke logger. There are programs that when installed on a computer will log and email all the keystrokes that has been done on the computer that its installed on. You can find one on downloads.com. Good luck, Bill | |
|
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/17/2004 8:47:19 AM | | Thanks, Bill. I'm feeling much better today. I am so much more worth what Don was willing to give. No more crying. No more complaining. It's over, done, and I've moved on. | |
|
| |
| Do I need to worry? Trouble in Paradise?
Posted: 11/17/2004 10:56:41 AM | | Thank you. No, he didn't deserve me, because I would have loved him dearly until the end of our days. Somewhere out there in this big world is the right man for me, but I'm not obsessed with it.. when we find each other the timing will be right, until then I have a wonderful life that I wouldn't change for anything. Patience is the key. | |
|
|
|
Home
login 