| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/22/2006 3:31:27 AM | | Why would you be hurt that he is still active on a dating site? Obviously you are still active on one, thus this thread. Try some communicating. Talk about why you are still on here, ask why he's still on there. His answers may be good, they may be bad, but at least then you'll know exactly what's going on instead of assuming the worst. I hope it all works out and your fears can be put to rest. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/22/2006 4:36:59 PM | Well.... I belong here and another "singles" site that have great forums. I enjoy seeing all the different outlooks on things and reading threads that have some of the same questions that I myself have.
There are many couples and folks in relationships that frequent the other site that I am on just for the message boards and to talk with the other members that they actually met in person.
I don't get many, if any, responses datewise on these sites so I check the forums. If I do get into a relationship I surely won't hide that from them and let them read anything that I have to say. If they aren't comfortable with that then we will discuss it and go from there. I would definitely change my status to unavailable though.
JMO  | |
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Catwm
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Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 380 | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/22/2006 7:33:42 PM | | well it ok as log as he is not trying to meat people a few good chats are fine there is no problem with friends and if the relationship is serious and its been going on for a while then why is there a need for the dating site but if you are newly dating then no problem eventually there will be no need for the site if things go further | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/22/2006 7:45:33 PM | I think that if you are just seeing each other to get to know if each other is the right one, then there is no need to get off the dating site. But if you've verbalized "exclusivity" to each other and decided to be in a relationship, I think both parties should get off dating sites, whether or not you have friends on that site. It's all about consideration of the other's feelings and lending some feelings of security to each other that you've made a commitment to each other and you're no longer looking. Just my opinion.  | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/22/2006 10:22:46 PM | | i also feel that a guy doesnt want to end the dating site till he knows things are good he might have spent time building the profile and chatted with a few promising people so he just wants to make sure things are going to work out before he abandons the sight but luckly with this site it is easier to do that we do not have to pay for it like most all dating sights out there so if i were getting serious on her it would be easier to abandon the site but if i were on a pay site i would have trouble abandoning because i payed i need to get my money worth | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/23/2006 3:08:10 PM | | well for sure sometimes especially for men it might take awhile to build up a profile and all but sheesh it only takes a second to switch to say unavailable..or taken than to leave it that you still looking.....no one says you have to give up your forums when your no longer available but you can get into forums easy enough when you say your taken to...just a thought | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/23/2006 3:12:44 PM | | It depends on which site you're taling about and in what category he is in. Say it was here and he was seeking friends and chatting I don't see the issue. If he's looking for someone else he'll do it if he's on a dating site or not. Experiment and I know this is underhanded but try making a fake profile and writing to him? See if he's wanting just friends or more that way at least you'll know..if he tells you no thanks then don't worry he's not doing anything wrong talking to buddies he met online. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/23/2006 10:08:36 PM | You say the relationshp is getting serious, but just how serious is it? Have you taked to him about whether or not you're seeing other people or if that's ok? When I date someone I still see other people, as long as it's okay with the other person or until i decide I want to see them exclusively. I always let them know that's the way things are and that if they want to take things to the next level (ex: an exclusive thing) all they have to do is let me know. It's then up to me to decide if that's what I want as well. Perhaps this guy has a similar opinion (it's ok to see other people and seek out other potential dates) until you've had the committment talk, but just hasn't been as vocal about it as I am....
My advice would be just talk to him and ask him where he thinks the relationship is going and where it is at right now, then decide if that's what you want. If it isn't let him know what you want. If he doesn't want to change you have to decide either to accept things the way they are and stay with him or leave and find someone who's looking for what you want. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/24/2006 4:33:34 PM | Well, I met a man on another dating site. He made a really big deal about closing his account on that site. We were a couple for 6 months. He had a folder on his computer that had my photo in it linked to that dating site and he would check on me to see if I had gone into my account at all! Little did I know till just recently that he was still listed on 6 dating web sites!!
HELLO!!! Here he was watching my every move, and he was still looking for better. When I found out, I ended the relationship post-haste. And he had the nerve to tell me I was over reacting to the whole thing. A cheat is a cheat. So now I hope to find someone who will appreciate a true heart. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/24/2006 4:57:10 PM | | yes i believe you should ask him why hes still looking its one thing to just be chatting but if its on a dating site ask him if hes serious about you or not? if not then i say move on why should you be hurting because of him yes i believe your right about feeling unjustified if you are dating and it is getting serious like you say then he should be a gentleman and delete his file also until say things dont work out between the two of you if that happens it sounds like hes a player a few years ago i dated this guy i worked with thought i was the only one like he said yea right he was dating other women at the job also without me knowing one just happened to be a friend of mine i ended it then ok you say you see each other a couple times a week whoes he seeing the other times and telling them that hes serious hmmmm? well good luck girl later alpinette | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/26/2006 3:51:19 PM | Well I am in this same situation and Living with him and supposed to be getting married in 8 weeks. He says he was only on to delete his profile but he still goes on it and well then he didnt delete it. We have a little girl and a baby on the way. I am on here just to see when he is and just for this post because it has to do with the situation I am in. I dont have a reason to look at other guys. He doesnt have a reason to look or talk to other girls he just doesnt know why he does it and admits to it ( Sometimes ) But it hurts especially when he hits on people you have known for a long time and they tell you and send you the emails he sent them. So Bigger Guy what do you have to say about my situation????  | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/27/2006 8:48:40 AM | | well to reply to all of your posts. For 1 I am staying to give my kids a loving family. He is great with our little girl and a great father. Mostly its for them I want them to have a great life and not go through what I did when I was little growing up without a father. I do love him very much. I just wish one day he will wake up and just stop doing these things. I know I am being very dumb staying. But it just seems like the right thing to do for the kids. I would rather them be happy than me. They mean the world to me to see them smile will make me happy. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/27/2006 4:26:50 PM | | blonde Well it's your life, just consider this. Unless his behavior stops which is unlikely your children will grow up with the male role model of a cheating husband/father. That's the environment you'll be raising your children in. And don't think they won't know when they're older. My opinion is (mother of four, here) is that I'd rather raise children alone than with a bad male role model. Just something to think about. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 6/27/2006 4:37:16 PM | Hi. This happened to me too. He said he was just going to the site to do the forums. I severely doubt this was true. I think he was looking for something better and keeping his options open.
Confrontation isn't the answer because he can just lie about it. You need to consider just yourself and how you feel and do what your heart tells you is the right thing for you.
Good luck. The hurt will go away in time. The old saying "time heals all" is really true. | |
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