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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 1/29/2007 7:39:02 AM | I have to laugh because your on this site right now talking about it. Yes, there are players out there we all know that but get real people come on here to talk and check out places to go and other things. I don't think anyone should have to delete there profile unless your living together or your very serious about marriage. I don't delete my profile when I'm dateing because who knows what is down the road. I don't date other people if I'm seeing someone who I care about and he cares about me. Like they say honesty is the best way to go. I wouldn't care if someone I was dateing was on here as long as I new he was being honest. I would not want to date someone who lies to every women on here if he can't e-mail people back and tell them he is dating and wants to see how this works out then so be it. When I'm dating someone I'm interested in I e-mail people back and tell them which is the right thing to do. I like coming on here for other things beside dating.  | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/3/2007 9:02:57 AM | If he were serious about you, he wouldnt hesitate to be off this site. Speaking from 8 mos of hell, I had the same thing happen. When I confronted the situation, he had no problems deleting his ad but..... he created another, and then I found ads elsewhere. Learn from my mistakes. DONT LET WORDS CLOUD THE FACTS. Actions speak lounder than words. You want to believe and trust, but there are some professional cons and they can make you believe anything with what they say. Look at his track record and TRUST YOUR GUT! No good woman deserves a cheat and a con.
Good Luck! | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/3/2007 9:18:06 AM | You cant fall in love with one, when you are running with millions. Personally I think you see that with people who dont want to fall, the relationship isnt right for them to fall, or they just cant settle.
Always remember, anyone can be anything and anybody on here. I actually busted a guy once by creating a ficticious profile and emailed him, under that profile. It was so fun to get the response and then bust the game by signing the ficticious name aka real name.
If you have to check up on them, are they really worth it? You probably already know the answer about what hes doing and his real intentions, but sometimes we want to make sure. There are lots of ways to do that. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/3/2007 1:42:41 PM | I am in the same situation, i met him on a dating site 15 months ago, moved here from back east. I thought everthing was great, but 7 months into the relationship he started looking on the sites again. It was in October when realized that he did not want me as his soulmate. I knew that something wasn't right, whenever i came into the room he would change the computor screen to something else, then one day i was next to him while he was on the computer, and I saw a name pop up on his messanger and asked him who is that was he said oh that happens all the time. So I let it got "NOT". I finally approached him about what I had seen. Then that is when he told me that he did not see us together long term. He said that I had to many gray issues in my life, like my age there is a 9 yr. difference between us but he knew this before, there are to many reasons to list. So to put more salt on the wounds, he was already talking to some one else, did not even wait for the body to get cold. So now all my dreams and hope are being served to her on a silver plater. If you even supect that he is online then he is. Get out now and , it is an addiction with most men, and they have no regets about it. | |
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T-05
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Joined: 1/20/2007
Msg: 887 | |
| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/5/2007 11:30:18 PM | I think probably what most of you think , ok if i meet somone offline and i think are are a great girl and there is a chance at something good I delete every site i am on and tell all my msn contacts sorry i have met someone so you prpobably wont be hearon from me ,
It seems like alot of people here are jusy looking for the next best thing and they meet someone nice but oh well maybe they are talkin to hotti456643 or nicegurl9874307 and maybe they would be better , how can you make a good honest effort in a realationship if you keep the temptaion around and the whole oh we are just frineds things is suck a crock its called your back up and yes ladies do it ,too , i think if you want to make something work you have to step away from your fun little internet world and call your lady yea call her not email or text just call to say hi , put some focus into here because there is no such thing was wasted time, only maybe a good experiece or a bad one that you can learn from but you woll never know if you are to preoccupied tryin to talk to 13 other girls its not fair for guys to do it to girls or girls to do it to guys, delete all your dating sites and give it a try, cause we all know that this site will still be here in the futuer and after you made a good solod effort come back and make a new profile, oh its so hard to do that isnt it , i think people are not patient and if it doesnt work out on the first date they just run back to the good ol dating site, well maybe you should try my way , and yes , my lasy realationship didnt work out but that was from a differnt site i thougt this one may bet better cause there aer some old more "mature" people on here but it really isnt, sorry i wrote way to much to read , nut if you read this whole thing thanks , and have a swell day/night | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/6/2007 9:39:05 AM | | He is DISRESPECTFUL!!!! Confront him first,give him 3 days to delete his accounts and he'll either prove his loyalty to you or not,and if not kick him to the curb !!!You deserve respect and loyalty..Don't shut him out by not communicating, be firm,up front and to the point,then kick him to the curb,because he does not deserve you !!!!!! | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/6/2007 10:30:52 AM | | WHOA.....I been on this thing for a little while and I have some friends on here that are JUST friends. My man has been on this thing for a minute as well and he has people on here that are just friends. For people that don't get a chance to get out much and socialize, this a good place to talk and meet people. Don't be so insecure (UNLESS he's sending messages to women telling them that he wants to tie them up and do things to them). Let the man have his freedom. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/12/2007 11:30:28 AM | If he said it was for the forums I would still have a problem with it. There are forums on other sites he could participate in. The forums here are mostly on single topics anyways.
I wish POF would change a few of the choices available to us on our profiles. For example "I am seeking neither" and "just here for the forums" to end this debate once and for all. They could even offer the option of not wanting to receive any personal mail whatsoever.
Too often somebody who is married or as in this case, involved with somebody from POF, ends up getting chewed out for their presence. But I've had plenty of married female friends who read Cosmopolitan or similar magazines which are geared - as far as I can tell - to getting serially laid. Same thing goes for men's magazines I suspect.
I don't think that it necessarily means anything at all if a person is checking out what 'everyone' else is doing and commenting on it. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/13/2007 5:22:44 PM | First off - why does everyone think it was this site. I could have been any number of sites not POF. There are too mant to even start to mention.
Second - how is it that these people concerned about this are aware of all this going on. Because they spend too much time on the computer. Many of them are obsessed with these contraptions. Instead of making the relationship stronger they are weakening it. The effort they spend on this kind of thing would be better towards the relationship itself. Then the time spent to spy. It sounds as though there is a big trust issue and likely it's their issue and not the persons they 're complaining about.
Third - it's important to realize that it doesn't matter where you get the appetite as long as you go home to eat. Don't ignore the fact that this stuff is all around you, step up and face it. Make what you give in return good enough to keep the person. There's a reason the person is with you in the first place - don't lose sight of that. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/13/2007 6:05:06 PM | Just a thought....why not just put in your profile "ONLY HERE FOR THE FORUMS PLEASE DONT MESSAGE ME!!!" Im thinking that would be a pretty good heads up! I have right on my profile, not looking for a date, not a trick to try and get one!
This being only from my personal experience, when I was married, my wasband checked a dating site weekly and hid it from me, I then ended up dating someone later that "oops" messaged my friend on a dating site, both men claimed it was "nothing" "looking for friends" hmmmmmmmmmm every town has a local tavern, one has to think you dont need a dating site!
I personally think here nor there on it, it doesnt bother me one way or the other. If you have an issue about it, communcate it. You can roll it over and over in your mind forever but you will never come up with the right answer. If it bothers you, express it, what he choices to do from the point forward will determine how you deal with the "relationship". Perhaps it is all innocent and he has no idea it bothers you! | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/13/2007 6:37:01 PM | | I personally was in a relationship with a guy for 8yrs and caught him cheating once for gave him then just recently found out after s o many yrs together he was going on dateing sites and leading a double life as a matter of fact he had done this with everyone of the relationships before me and i thought i could change him ,he is on this system now and is playing about 6different weman (71steven ) laddies watch out for him anyway i though after I left him in my dust Imight as well try this system out and see if there are any good men out there....but I totally think its wrong to live a double life...... | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/20/2007 12:18:38 PM | Isn't it obvious...a player...move on...
Now I fully understand the old saying "Ignorance sports a mustache and poses with dogs". I was never quite sure of the relevence of that saying till just now. Thank you for so throughly illustrating what it mean Sonora. Way to go!
Contrary to what some of you future "Spinsters in training" , and future "He was a nice boy, a very quiet boy, who would of thought he could do that" types might think, with your ill informed, and apparently unpondered ideas of what this site is about, most people aren't on this site looking for their latest "hook up", or 'hang out". They aren't all looking for someone who enjoys dying the fur of their Pomeranian on the weekends, or combing and trimming their "stache". Some people are actually just here for nothing more than to communicate in these very forums, or to retain friendships they made over the course of meeting that special person. How do I know this? Because for 6 months I was one of those people.
My story is no differnt than dozens of others. I was a member of this site, I met and became intimately involved with someone (from another site), and while I deleted my profiles on the other sites, I maintained my profile here on this one, clearly indicating that I am "not single/not looking ( a very nifty feature of this site), and writing such in my profile, that I was here for forums and friends only. In fact, my girlfriend at the time and I would very often stop by here to read the forums together, or to see how a thread I had started was progressing. I even went so far as to start a thread about her Disney Fixation, which we both enjoyed immensely, and she was never a member herself.
Now granted there are some not so nice people on this site, just as there is on others, you can't change that, all you can do is try to avoid it. But before you go ignorantly presuming that anyone still on this site who is involved is a player, or cheater, or worse, perhaps you should consider the advice mommy gave you back when you were 4 years old ; "Think before you speak". If she never told you that, mea culpa, but now you know. Good luck!
Have fun ;)! | |
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xodara
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Joined: 10/7/2006
Msg: 900 | |
| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/20/2007 1:19:20 PM | Thorn,
Although I'd like to agree with you, I can't this time.
My profile clearly states I'm just here for the forums. Yet, I get lots of emails from men who try to court me. If I was not single, I'm sure I'd still get those emails.
I do have a problem with men being on here when they have someone, but I had a bad experience with an ex and these forums. And, I'm not saying these forums led him to stray. (He would have anyway because that's who he is.) I'm simply saying that I question the type of man who'd prefer to post and spend most of his free time on here.
And, I think that being on here is like sticking an alcholic in a bar when he's just starting to become sober. It's just a recipe for disaster.
I'm skeptical is all. | |
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