| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 7:29:27 AM | keepingstep I am sorry this has happened to you. Its happend to me as well. They make a connection, want to be friends, but are still looking for greener pastures.
I think this is something we have to go through to meet the right one. I dont know quite how to handle it, because if you connect instantly with someone, and they dont with you , but they like you, do you run or keep trying for a couple of weeks while they are searching for all the perfect parts they want?
I dont know, but I know it hurts. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 8:07:04 AM | a couple of weeks is not a RELATIONSHIP..sounds like your giving him all the things that we are all looking for in a lifetime. Trying to fill that void in his life ....if your hurt..you need to step back and ask why you think this is a relationship in such a short period of time?
I don't think a few weeks your entitled to make him give up ANYTHING!! That's way too demanding ..wait a few years then see what happens?
Just to clue you in......these guys are in it for the FANTASY...like Playboy magazines..porn sites..some guys get a kick out of talking IM sex with women and it has nothing to do with you...don't take it personal...
It is an ego thing for these men to gather up few women and date them at HIS will..controlling the situation..so IF you are looking for a FAST-MONOGAMOUS/ MARITAL TYPE relationship on this site..fuggetaboutit... | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 8:23:45 AM | | Anytime I've met anyone I'm spending a lot of free time with I don't always necessarily take my profile down. But Usually I don't go on the dating sight much. You kinda lose interest as your interests are tied up. The fact he's on every day would be a sign to me personally he's still playing the field and keeping his options open. I would suggest you put your profile back up and do the same. Talk to him about it, see what exactly is going on. I too have made internet "pally wallies" but to be honest kind of distance myself and keep my private dating affairs out of the conversations. So as far as the "pally wallies" go I think that is a crock!!! | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 9:36:13 AM | | You pretty much nailed it arealangel .. there are tons of guys who have this internet addiction and mislead a lot of women. Probably women do it too. If only they realized that they are hurting people by their actions. You can't take these guys to heart .. it's a hard lesson to learn. I guess I've learned it now. These sites are not the place to find anyone long term. Most are on here for an ego boost if nothing else and leave a trail of bewildered women behind. Who cares ... I say f**ck em and feed em fish heads! (an old Newfie expression) | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 9:47:37 AM | (This is getting serious.)
I guess my question would be... "Is this your opinion or both of your opinions?
Have you even discussed the issue os seriousness w/ him?
The whole idea of "dating", iss just that- you "date" people, get to know them and hope to find someone you are compatible w/ and you can see a long-term future with.
Unless you've talked about the level of seriousness of your "relationship" and come to an agreement that you are exclusive or you want to take it to the next level, or not, then you really have nothing to get on his case about... he's dating you, an who knows, maybe others too !
You said you met while ago, how long ago is awhile?.. a month, 2 weeks, a year?
It does make a difference I think...
Again, you'd be doing yourself a favour to communicate w/ him about this instead of checking up on him behind his back ! | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 10:32:23 AM | | eveybody thinks there is always something better out there it may not be greener on the other side of the fence if you meet somebody and are happy why continue looking- i met somebody that i started seeing but for some strange reason he kept looking on POF i guess he thought there was something better out there - i wish him the best if he did it to me he will continue to do it ladies | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 10:45:05 AM | hey, i'm kinda in the same boat. I met a seems-to-be awesome guy off of POF, and now we've been OFFICIALLY together for 5 months, (him being the very persistent one about it) and before that, hanging out/seeing/whatever for a couple months. We spend all our time together, he tells me all the time that i'm the only one for him, that there is no one else, yet, he is still on this site. thats fine. so am i, but i am very clear on what i'm looking for. i'm listed as 'dating someone', looking for friends only, and he's mentioned all over my profile. Meanwhile, although his says looking for friends, he is still listed as being single, and we all know what that means. pretty much EVERY guy says looking for friends, but if they can get something more, they're ALL OVER IT. And... there is not one mention of his 'one and only girl' (me), although it does mention his perfect first date. It just really makes me wonder, like, what the hell is going on? Am i his reality, but not good enough, so he's still fantasizing about all those other girl out there? is he trying to upgrade? or am i just crazy? And do i say something to him, or is it not my business? Will i sound like a crazy jealous girlfriend, or am i justified in asking? Any advice??  | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 11:10:21 AM | | Hey northernlites .. you are justified in asking. Still doesn't mean he won't feed you a line of BS but at least your cards are on the table. Maybe you just need to talk about it openly. Maybe you really are his one and only. You're right though ... if the guy says he's just looking for friends but more is offered from someone, what's to say he won't jump all over it. That's why he being on here makes you think he's looking for something better and just holding onto you in the meantime. You've been honest with him. Make him fess up for your own sanity. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 11:59:02 AM | | If the guy continues online, then he is far from committed to you. If your looking for a commitment, better keep fishing cause this one is not a keeper. Lots of professional daters and cheats on these systems but there are also great men on here just waiting for you to find them. Don't settle for the online shopper, cause you can be sure they will not settle either. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 1:03:39 PM | Well I went through the same situation for SEVERAL MONTHS. My "friend" told me that she was just 'TALKING' with the guys and not dating them. I had even given her a 3 carat diamond ring which she later sold. Then on Valentines day she said I was her ONLY valentine. While we were dating she even kept her cell phone out of sight so that she could communicate with other men. All told I spent about 40,000 dollars while hoping she would commit to me. So then, I learned a lot about women too who like to keep there OPTIONS OPEN. Yes, she was attractive, yes I am only a 7, so not being JAMES BOND
I know how you feel. It happens to men also. P.S.Is there an 8 out there that will commit to a 7 who is 100 per cent faithful when committed too ?
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 1:54:46 PM | | I think it is a trust issue. If you really like that person, give him/her some trust. A lot of the times, the reason you question if your partner is cheating on you, keeping his/her options open or doing stuff behind your back, is because you are doing the same thing, or you have done it before. Otherwise, why would you be concerned? What goes around comes around. Internet does has its disadvantage, so does real life. | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 3:45:08 PM | | Pisces.... all I can say is that I have known you for over a year as a friend only, and I would say I know more about your off/on relationship to which she refers than she can obviously remember... well, she had to have been blind to not see it wasn't working.... any man that encourages you to date other men is being honest.... not a player..... and although she says she has moved on, considering the anger in her posts, it certainly doesn't look or sound like it...... and yeah, you are a flirt... that much I will acknowledge...... as you flirt with me all the time, even though you know I have eyes only for one person.... and yes, he knows about you.... but I take it as a joke, and my guy is not so insecure as to take your flirting seriously...... if she took your flirting seriously in one of your "on" sessions..... then she is more insecure than you know.... just move on, my friend...... as she claims to have done....... JMHO.... ~R | |
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| What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/22/2006 11:28:49 PM | | i guess it all depends on how he's going about it. if he's there to find someone else for a relationship like the one you two have, leave him. if he's just looking to meet new friends in the area, i think its ok, as long as they're just friends. keep in mind POF is a dating site... and YOUR posting on it... so your doing the same thing. right? if so you shouldn't be a do what i say, not what i do kind of person. | |
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