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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 12:39:58 PM | Hmmm some of the things I've done. This brings back a lot of memories.
I wrote little letters telling them how happy I felt in the relationship, how they made me feel etc.
I've made home movies of myself doing sexual things for him to view when he got home.
I've bought lots of gifts for him...things I knew he liked...fly fishing gear, stuff like that.
I've made special meals with candlelight and such...(that didn't seem to work much)
I've bragged about him to my friends...
I've sang him songs that I felt appropriate to how I felt...( didn't seem to do much)
I've written poems about how I felt about him.
I've brought him little things like a rose with a note at his place of work because he had a really hard day and I wanted to reassure him that it would be ok.
A whole bunch of stuff that I guess would be considered romantic but I was just loving him. That's how it works isn't it? | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 12:49:05 PM | Sandra...it didn't work...he said he felt unappreciated and that our communication sucked LOL!
He also was having an affair with a girl at work. Ouch...my boo boo!
Ah well...time heals all wounds right? | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 12:49:22 PM | I 'm thinking now if a women did these things that .. one .. i am in trouble big time? two... shes going to break up with me...three... she pregnate. four... she wants something. 
i think it would be nice of a women to do them kinds of things.. it's great when you can tel the guys... you know what.. my women is awesome!
I have done tons of things from leaving the rose and notes. to cleaning her apartment when she was at work and having dinner for her.. and so on.. | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 1:04:18 PM | Blast ....
Sounds like you did everything "right" and he did everything "WRONG". Hope you wrote him off as a Loser with a capital "L"!!
Jim ....
Gee ..... and she didn't appreciate those things? Hmmmmm...... | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 2:00:32 PM | Interesting topic. And it had me truely thinking...what romantic thing has one of my relationships done for me? What have I done for them?
One thing that I have noticed is that in most of my past relationships, the woman really didnt know how to be romantic, but expected it to be given to them.
I too have done the "set the table in fine china with candles, classical music, and her favorite meal" routine. And the next day she would have made a meal for her and her kids, and said, go get your own, after a long day at work no less.
I will brush her hair, give nightly back rubs, pick up her kids, get her morning coffee, encourage her to get out with her friends (while I baby sit), ya da ya da. Heaven forbid if I asked her to pick up my son!
This didnt just happen with one woman either.
It is my FEELING (someone correct me if I am wrong) but alot of women now expect all of this to happen with no need to return the affection. But to me, that is what makes a great realtionship... the LITTLE special things.
It is now to the point where I agree with Jimi77..... if something nice is done...what do you want....? Which is truely sad!
So I continue to fish for the RIGHT lady...... | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 4:21:49 PM | bcnu......
You expressed, sadly but exactly, what I thought had been the experience of most men. That women want and really expect to be treated romantically, but don't know how or don't feel the need to reciprocate! What a bummer for you men out there! I always thought part of being of the feminine ilk meant OBVIOUSLY knowing how to be romantic to/for their partner, not just how to "receive" romance "from" him. It's especially rewarding to see his face when giving a surprise that's least expected or, even better, gifted to him for no reason at all. Most of the womens' profiles I've viewed say they are looking for a romantic man (including mine! LOL) ..... but how many men have ever really found a romantic woman? Hmmmmmmm ....... does make one wonder!
Sandy! | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 4:23:04 PM | bcnu......
You expressed, sadly but exactly, what I thought had been the experience of most men. That women want and really expect to be treated romantically, but don't know how or don't feel the need to reciprocate! What a bummer for you men out there! I always thought part of being of the feminine ilk meant OBVIOUSLY knowing how to be romantic to/for their partner, not just how to "receive" romance "from" him. It's especially rewarding to see his face when giving a surprise that's least expected or, even better, gifted to him for no reason at all. Most of the womens' profiles I've viewed say they are looking for a romantic man (including mine! LOL) ..... but how many men have ever really found a romantic woman? Hmmmmmmm ....... does make one wonder!
Sandy! | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 4:28:04 PM | Hmmmmmm..... here I am reading between the lines again (like I tell everyone else NOT to do......) but it seems to me that men and women may have differing ideas on what "romance" means to them. To men, it would seem being thoughtful, doing something nice for their partner, trying to help her in a variety of ways. To women, it would seem that they are looking for sweet words, small endearments, subtle protectiveness, gentle caresses, and less "animate" things. Am I reading the male/female thing all wrong here, or do the two genders have definitely different ideas of what makes up "romance"? If so, no wonder both sides seem to be always disappointed ..... or disappointing??
Sandy! | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 4:41:14 PM | Hey Disco Daddy!
Now YOU sound like one of the "real men" I was talking about in my initial post to this thread! Thanks for taking the time to put down your thoughts ....... your gal must be a very lucky one :) Romantic AND thoughtful ...... hmmmmmmm ...... live anywhere near the NW?? LOL!!
Sandy! | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 4:51:12 PM | William .......
EXACTLY! The "giving" part is what is romantic ........ am I right??? Now if BOTH PARTNERS are "giving" then "receiving" is obvious and everybody's happy!
NOW WE'RE TALKING!!!!!
Sandy! | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 4:56:58 PM | | Many women coming out of a bad, long relationship have difficulty being their prior personality. Being ridiculed, stomped and suppressed. So show some sympathy. Teach by example. Stop complaining and always wear plaid. Not! | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 5:15:58 PM | dwa .... Whaaaat?????
I think you posted to the wrong forum. I haven't heard any complaints on this one, only supportive suggestions! And who would ever want to be their "prior personality"? We all grow, every day, whether we want to or not, from what happens during that day ...... and we change from each of those experiences. Who'd wanna go backwards when we're all trying to go forward?
I didn't see anyone seeking sympathy here either ... only sharing stories and part of themselves. And as for "teaching" and "complaining" ... I'm not doing either but it sure sounds like you are! Maybe you'd better regroup and make sure you're addressing the right topic. | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 5:22:52 PM | | i believe women know how to be romantic. i even had women buy cards and some have bought me flowers. they are romantic in their own way with guys. a woman usually will buy a guy man things to show them that they love them. if you have a woman that truly loves you, she will show you the same way you show her. with things she knows you love or hopes you will love. | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 5:24:35 PM | Here is one of the things I have become aware of over the years. Might be wrong - but in my opinion, if you ask a guy to define romantic, he'll think of the big things - the full candlelight dinner at a fancy restaurant, cruise to the bahamas - some guys will buy a woman a dishwasher and figure that because he's made her life easier, he has just done something romantic. And once a guy has done this romantic thing, he figures he's covered for the year.
A woman on the other hand, sees romance in the little things - the little note that says 'I love you' left next to the cup of coffe prepared for her just the way she likes it on saturday morning- a rose left on the pillow that she finds upon going to bed at the end of a long day... a silly little poem that you wrote just to tell her how much you love her - a romantic card mailed to the house instead of just handed to her on the way in the door - just a phone call to say I was thinking of you and I wanted to hear your voice more than anything else in the world right now...
I believe the catch is that a lot of women actually do these little things for us, and we men don't always notice.
Of course I'm speaking in general here, and these are just my thoughts on the matter, but I sure find that the little things are very much appreciated... | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 5:52:51 PM | men do go all out...at times...with the flowers being sent to work...dinners...romantic walks...lots of hand holding...things that maybe they think the woman that they are trying to impress wants..
women...little things...to please her man...notes...sexy panties...or not...
i think the problem arises...when there is not a balance or communication...when the other feels unappreciated...
no man has ever told me something to do...say...that they would consider to be romantic...that they "needed" to feel appreciated...
but on the other hand neither have i...it's an expected "if you knew me..you'd know what i like" kind of thing.
that's probably why it's not working for me... | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 5:54:47 PM | MusicMan
(She sits thinking........) .... so do you think, then, that men don't like these little things that we do, don't want them, or don't appreciate them? (Or all of the above LOL??) Or maybe, they just feel smothered or uncomfortable with it all then too?
Wondering.....
Sandy! | |
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| Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/14/2005 5:55:31 PM | | You know, we can only control our own behavior. If a man doesn't respond to a romantic gesture, that's really sad. One of the things I've come across is that your partner may have their own ideas of romantic guestures they'd like, but you may have a different idea of what you consider "romantic". Too bad that any romantic gesture can't be appreciated just for the thought of it, even if it's something that wasn't your favorite. | |
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