| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/11/2008 2:15:05 PM | I cheated on my husband with a married man. I loved my husband but not in a lustful way, not the whole package, so I guess the answer was I didn't truly love him. As for the married man I was totally committed to him and I knew I would never cheat on him. He claimed he loved his wife but I was foolishly the 4th person he had an affair with so I guess he never loved anyone except himself. | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/11/2008 8:27:25 PM | | No, never. It isn't worth it. If you are truly in love with him/her, they complete you so much, you don't need to look outside of that bond for something you think you might be missing. | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/11/2008 8:34:17 PM | | Never in a million years could I ever cheat on anyone I'm in love with... shit its hard enough after I break up with someone I'm that in love with to even look or talk to anyone else never mind sleep with someone else or screw them. | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/11/2008 9:04:12 PM | | Cheating is as simple as looking at another girls ass and you know what your mind thinks then!of coarse you can cheat on someone your in love with,the trick is to not let it happen.Just keep looking at your girls ass(hopefully you like it lol)and there will never be any cheating(atleast on your part). | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 12:56:45 AM | i agree with what you're saying, and i do believe that it is possible for a person to be in love with more than one person at once. however cheating has no place in a polyamorous or or polygamous relationship anymore than it does in a monogamous relationship. cheating shows a lack of respect for your partner or partners, is based on deception, and reflects an attitude of self-interest.
True, I never said that polygamy or polyamory was cheating, or even implied it. It was just an example against the thinking here that suggests if you do cheat you can't possibly really be in love or that you can't cheat if you are. Cheating or not has far less to do with being in love than with integrity, respect, and empathy.
If you want a partner who won't cheat it's those kinds of character traits you should be looking for, not whether they love you.
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 6:52:11 AM | Allow a voice of experiance speak words of wisdom,
if you are with someone and love them there is no way you should cheat;so leave them at home and get out there and grab what you can whilst she is ironing  | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 6:53:21 AM | Huh? ha!.....................................................all's fair in love and war?
Cf. [1578 Lyly Euphues I. 236] Anye impietie may lawfully be committed in loue, which is lawlesse.
to be exact | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 10:21:49 AM | "moments in time".....should not be allowed to dictate the rest of your life!
For whatever reason one 'cheated'.......such a wide wide variation in the 'word' as its related to the action................I DO NOT CONDONE IT! In the manner I consider the 'word'..........
I COULD NOT FORGIVE a partner in the manner I consider the word..........
BUT....that is a 'fundamental' part of who I am I would have clearly made understood in the 'beginning' of a relationship....at which point the act would become BETRAYAL.....and for me.....I don't believe there is 'recovery'......"Cheating".....comes in many forms.....I can be 'cheated on and betrayed' by you without it being in the manner of sexual activity with another. Doing me just as much harm and perhaps destroying what I believed 'special in what we had together'. | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 10:44:03 AM | Regarding the OP, I'll have to say that you first have to make a distinction between the two main types of cheating. There's the kind where you go out to the club, get drunk, wake up next to a total stranger. Then there's the kind where you carry on an affair over a period of time.
As far as the first one? Alcohol (and other such substances) affect the centers of your brain that deal with judgment, reasoning, and moral/ethical decision making. In other words, yes, I could see myself getting drunk and making a really stupid mistake. This has nothing to do with how much I love my partner, or how much I respect her, or anything like that.
As for the second? No. You cannot carry on an affair behind someone's back if you truly love them. Outside of an open relationship, or some other situation where the parties involved have set up parameters to guide such a thing, then if you love them, you must respect them. If you respect them, then you will not, can not cheat. | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 10:50:27 AM |
Paul Newman said, "Why would I want hamburger, when I have steak at home?"
...but dont you just want to get your hands on a nice juicy burger, you know that flame broiled meat with....i dont know what just came over me. i dont know what just happened - Some comedian | |
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TBLZ
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Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 863 | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 11:09:18 AM |
Cheating is as simple as looking at another girls ass and you know what your mind thinks then!of coarse you can cheat on someone your in love with,the trick is to not let it happen.Just keep looking at your girls ass(hopefully you like it lol)and there will never be any cheating(atleast on your part).
You kinda contradicted yourself there, Floyd! LOL Looking at a girl's butt is not cheating. Looking at porn is not cheating; however if he is watching porn while I'm laying in bed, then it would seem he would rather spend those intimate moments with his left hand...um, his loss!
I have never cheated on any man I have been in a relationship with and never will. I put a lot of value into my relationships and would never hurt the man I love or jeopardize the relationship for a bit of sexual gratification. The temptation to cheat has not even ever been there for me and I guess, I can take a bit of pride in that. | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 11:58:14 AM | sex has nothing to do with love. as far as i know sex is a matter of enjoying. i do not 'look at' sex as a matter of bringing babies to this world but as a matter of having fun or enjoying.
of course it is better if you have sex with the person you love (that is great). but honestly none man on earth would say "no" if he had the chance to bed a different woman even if he is in love with his partner.
any man on this thread disagreeing with me is a liar, a bloody liar.
Pedro | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 12:05:23 PM | Real Love never hurts
and there-in lies the unrealistic expectations many others of my gender set for love. i'm sorry to burst your soap bubble, but life itself isn't perfect...there are bumps on every road, and as such, even a life shared with someone you truly love will have its flaws, its pain, and its hurt. don't put love up on a pedestal so high, that you cannot ever hope to reach it. because if you expect perfection in life or love, i'm sorry, but you will always be sorely disappointed with the actual result. | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 1:47:47 PM | LOVE
There are as many definitions of love as there are opinions. As a practical matter, that has served me well, I measure love this way. What ever else it is love must have these two attributes. It must be an act and it must be an act of unconditional giving.
Doctors Without Borders leave comfortable lives behind to help treat people in Darfur and Afghanistan. The woman I fell in love with in 1994; I knew she was risky but for two years I gave her my heart and soul. The sacrifices I made for my children in the nineties, I think back and both events warm my heart. But it took me 40 years to learn that there is great joy in giving. I wonder how Doctors Without Borders feel?
CHEATING
Cheating is a breach of contract. Whether overtly or covertly, all contracts have consequences when breached. I know, I am still paying (literary) for my breach with my first wife in 1983.
CAN I CHEAT?
No. The act of cheating would immediately bring into question my ability to love. Secondly, my strongest reaction would be to start to protect myself from having to pay for the next 25 years for my transgression. That would not be a loving act. | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 3:02:42 PM | | No, its that simple. Look at the people trying to justify it one way or another. You don't obviously love someone if you cheat on them. And if you do then you obviously don't care about anyone but yourself | |
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| Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with?
Posted: 10/12/2008 3:13:38 PM | | I dont see a contradiction in what I said?its ur thoughts that get u in trouble after u see something u like!.Put porn like this,if u need another woman naked and getting screwed to get it up thats cheating!(u keep the mental pic of that woman and her assets lol) a mans mind can dream up the hottest woman lol.Im totally against porn as far as bringing it into the relationship but to each there own. | |
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msing
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Joined: 9/13/2008
Msg: 874 | |
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