| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/20/2008 10:16:37 AM |
I believe online dating has set most peoples expectations off the charts as to what they will realistically find compared to what they're looking for.
eyes never lie....Are you asking those of us that have had many dates whether or not our expectations are too high? Did you ever consider that those that have no luck have the high expectations....and that's why they don't have any luck?
I was never single before online dating......so I dont know how many dates I would have had the old fashioned way before having a relationship. Geeze...the last time I was single was in high school.....Do those dates count? I do know that I had met about 50 men before I met the exbf...A few I was interested in but they were not...more felt the chemistry where I did not...........For any relationship to work, there's got to be mutual desire (chemistry) and compatibility. Finding that is rare - no matter how many people one meets. That's why most believe its a numbers game. The more you meet, the better one's chances are of finding what they're looking for.
HR  | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/20/2008 10:20:54 AM | | from this site, none yet. seems like getting that initial converstion going just hasn't worked. Frustrating when you try to focus on contacting those in your area with common interests and get no response. But I am getting used to it. Made (online )friends from other online means, but they never seem to what to actually meet, even after talking for 6 months..bleh. | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/20/2008 10:57:50 AM | eyes never lie....Are you asking those of us that have had many dates whether or not our expectations are too high? Did you ever consider that those that have no luck have the high expectations....and that's why they don't have any luck?
Hi happyrebel,
Actually that wasn't was I was asking but also a valid question maybe for some. I was speaking in general of anyone male , female, luck or no luck. Though, you also bring up a great question and observation about those with no luck. I'm just thinking that all of us are guilty in some way or another of our expectations being set high versus the reality of life in general.
I can't honestly say that I don't have any flaws (being the one). Neither can I say that a potential mate/prospect may see me as a " qualified" suitor. I can honestly say that I "will not" be the person that any one single woman will see as a perfect suitor. There is something about each and everyone of us that a potential suitor may see and run like the wind.
I believe it's not what you can't look past, it's what's you can look past and seek the qualities that stand out that suit your expectations the closest.
I'm not good with words, I'm more of an "actions" man. I hope what I said makes sense. | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/20/2008 11:18:36 AM | I've never counted.
Most of the time meet for coffee or a drink and I give it about 30 mintues, but I know in 10 seconds if I would ever really go out with them. The other 29 minutes and 50 seconds isn't a waste though, because I make friends easily and really enjoy meeting new people.
A couple times we've gone out 2-3 times and then just went our separate ways, because it wasn't going to progress.
With one guy, there was an instant connection, but not the right factors for a long-term relationship, so we go out occasionally and chat online, with the understanding that we see other people and if one of us finds someone better for them-good for them.
It's a numbers game, as you can see. From every 100 people that I get email from, I will never meet most, or we'll meet briefly to see if there is any possibility for chemistry in real life. And there might be one in a hundred that could turn into a relationship. | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/20/2008 3:11:38 PM | eyes never lie....I understood what you were trying to say. Kind of like because there are so many more people online dating that one is too reasonably meet IRL, maybe we unconsciously raise our standards - at least till we start running out of options. Is that what you meant? I might actually agree with part of that....but can't help thinking that the ones with few (if any) dates aren't the ones setting their expectations even higher.
Hmmm.....a new subject for another thread?
I thought your quote " I believe it's not what you can't look past, it's what's you can look past and seek the qualities that stand out that suit your expectations the closest."
was very well said.....so you do have a way with words. 
HR | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/21/2008 1:50:56 PM | One. I thought it went well, even went on a second date. I was interested, but I guess that was not a returned feeling. It possibly may have been my nervousnes...idk. It was immediately after I joined this site too and I thought maybe I would be lucky ha ha. But either way, I have yet to talk to anyone else to the point I would want to go on a date with them.  | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/21/2008 5:25:25 PM | | I have met 8 or so prospective dates in the last 8 years. One was only a first meet, she brought her one-year-old son. Six lasted for a month or two of dates and ended as friends. The last date and I had a relationship for 6 years. Probably not the norm, but, I like people who share the same interests as I. I feel this is a great medium to find people with like interests! | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/21/2008 6:57:24 PM | I've met 2 guys from this site. I did not like the first one. And the second was very nice but they way we met was very strange. I'm still new to online dating...but I'd still prefer DATING. Some of the things guys ask for a first date are just stupid.
:-/ | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/21/2008 8:01:39 PM | | I have met no joke, maybe 100 woman in person in 5 years. I used to talk to them alot on the phone ahead of time but found that a waste since if the chemsitry isnt working in person its a waste of time. Probably half werent into me, out of the other half, %80 I wasnt into at all. That left a small handfull that I saw more then once. Most of them were into me, untill a few months ago I got "dumped" for the first time ever. Two times in a month. Both missed the exes they said. I only really met one girl in 5 years that I liked alot to the point I think I would of stayed with her permanently, but she was flaky, dating other men, would never have sex with me, even after 15 dates, so I got fustrated and argued with her about the sex and we stopped dating. | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/22/2008 4:42:51 PM | Autumn can you elaberate more on that?  Oh and to answer the question. Well I met 2 on another sight years ago. And on POF I've met 5 in 3 years. Thats really not good odds I dont think. But the last one is promising, still seeing him....hehe | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/22/2008 5:16:18 PM | | I've met about a dozen guys over the past 8-9 years. Most were short lived, but there was the occassional one that lasted a while. | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/22/2008 7:03:57 PM | One when I was 19 and still a virgin. The guy assumed I wanted to jump into bed with him, and decided to let me down easy during a movie. I got offended that he assumed this of me and left.
Another when I was 20. We drove around and got some fast food. Another date didn't ensue.
Then I had one when I was 24... but it wasn't really a date since by the time we met he had a live in girl friend.
Another one when I was 24, but he ended up asking me half-way through the date if I knew anybody interested in buying weed from him.
Then again when I was 25, and that one ended up turning into a boyfriend with lots of dates. We'll only count him as one, though, since he's only one person.
Now I'm 26 (for less than a month) and I've had had two dates thus far from online. Both were only first dates, and niether held potential. But that guy I dated when I was 25 has turned into my friend with benefits...
All in all I've dated 7 guys from the internet. Wow... I had no idea it was so many. Gee, thanks for making me sit back and think while I added it up. | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/22/2008 7:52:29 PM | there is a new question: "How many years have you been internet dating for and are still single?"
Since women are so picky all my dates have been with my computer monitor. 2 yrs ago I had a lot with a Gateway but upgraded to a Dell since I was looking for someone with more expression. | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/23/2008 5:19:34 AM | Mmcm, I'm gonna tie your post into mine; cause I think that's a good question...
I'm almost 21 years old, I've been online dating since I was 13. Yep 13 years old. I've been using dating websites since I was 18; since there are age limits. From 13-18 typically it was guys in chatrooms or guys that played EverQuest or Unreal Tourney. In almost 8 years I have met over 25 people from online (I don't remember everyone, because some were just not memorable), I've met 17 people from telephone chat lines, and 13 from Video Games. My ex husband, I met online and I even my my first boyfriend online when I was 13. I have had boyfriends and/or just dates of people I've bumped into on the street or people that I went to school with when I was younger, but I've pretty much always met or dated people off the internet.
I'm absolutely fearless when it comes to meeting people, and should anything ever occur, I have a carry license and I do know how to shoot my gun quite well! | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/23/2008 7:47:15 AM |
there is a new question: "How many years have you been internet dating for and are still single?"
nmcmill2001.....Someone could be internet dating for 3 or 4 or 10 years but have relationships during that time. If when they've been single for years - without a relationship, while actively dating - that I might wonder about.
but I've pretty much always met or dated people off the internet.
kristin....I find that sad, to be honest. Whatever happened to dating guys in school and such? You're not even 21 and already divorced from a guy you met online? Sounds like you might want to try dating IRL....Sorry, didn't mean to sound so blunt and am not trying to hurt your feelings.
Am I the only one who thinks its sad that a lot of the younger crowd will not even know 'old fashioned' dating?
HR | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/23/2008 8:33:19 AM | Happy Rebel, I have dated plenty of guys in real life whom I went to school with and such. But honestly guys in normal every day life don't walk up to the pretty but still plus sized girl and say hi or anything, and when you walk up to them they usually cower in fear or laugh. I haven't "dated" that many people, but I have met that many people. It's not sad that I'm divorced, I'm sorry but you don't stay with an abusive man, I don't care HOW old you are or HOW long you were married. I don't feel that you hurt my feelings.
It is sad that so many people my age have to go online to find dates, because the members of the opposite sex are polluted by what they see on tv and in music; they think THAT'S what women should be. Old fashioned dating doesn't happen when you're plus size, it doesn't happen when you live somewhere where you know absolutely no one because it's not your hometown and you haven't lived there very long; it's also not going to happen when you're someone like me. Almost every man I meet is intimidated by me, not to mention I'm pregnant, can you imagine how difficult that would be to walk up to a man with a pregnant belly and ask him on a date? Yeah right! | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/23/2008 5:25:59 PM | I have never dated online before because I was always attached/married since age 18. I'm 44 now. I had one date in the last 2.5 years using regular non-internet meeting venues. Internet is easier to meet more people and chat first. I'm fairly shy when it comes to approaching strange women for conversation.
So, I really have nothing to compare online dating to, but I have been using it since 1 December after I returned to the US from overseas duty, and so far it has been a lot of fun and have met a ton of people and had five dates.
I thought at first I had met a keeper, but nothing from it, but still overall lots of fun. I would say stay in a public place though and keep it polite and friendly in the beginning. No matter how cool somebody seems in chattting in person they may be diffirent or even bad. | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/23/2008 10:00:03 PM | 2 from this site a long time ago, and 2 from eHarmony. I'm not too picky, just seems that most ladies in Minnesota are "picky" and are looking for the cream of the crop. I can't blame anyone for me being single still at the age of 40, it's because of severe social anxiety and depression from being alone and single. That's the first step, admitting that I am the one that has the problem....  | |
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| how many online dates have you had?
Posted: 12/23/2008 10:46:35 PM | More than I care to remember in this lifetime. Eee gads. 
But I just can't stay away from the forum madness. Sowwy. *snort* | |
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