| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/1/2006 1:17:44 PM | | I totally agree with you i have 5 very close guy friends that I have been friends with since i was in highschool i look at them like my brothers. They have always been very respectful and have never crossed that line. Weird part is i have dated 4 of them before and we became the best of friends and have never crossed that line. So it is possible as long as you set out the ground rules. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/1/2006 7:36:04 PM | | I think it's possible but not everyone is capable. I think there is usually some kind of sexual tension that has to be recognized and accepted. It's usually external factors, like significant others who complicate things... | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/1/2006 7:44:53 PM | Between marriages I had a male friend that I hung with and never had sex with. We never kissed for that matter except on the cheek. It was excellent, he was the last person I talked to every night before I went to sleep, we both had someone to spend quality time with, but none of the relationship hang ups.
If I could find an arrangement like that again I be set. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/1/2006 9:00:10 PM | | Of course it is possible. To believe that it is not is essentially to validate the excuses of the immoral. Give me a break. We are human beings and yes, we are very capable of interacting in healthy, fulfilling, non-sexual male/female friendships. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/1/2006 9:48:52 PM | I learnt my lesson with this. He always had female friends online & said its just friendly talk & nothing more. So me being the trusting one allowed this to go on for the whole relationship.. 7yrs go by..I knew something was up, but my heart told me different.. & at the beginning of this year he started getting too close to one of the girls & then 1.5 months ago he kicked me out for her.. He dragged me 500km & ditched me in this strang city.. He now drives to Sudbury to doink his pretty little university chick...ya I'm a bit bitter, but we had plans to get married this summer & he was my first everything (date, kiss the works, cheater is added to the list now)...
Sometimes your heart will lie to you, I think you should go on one of these outtings.
Back in Ottawa I had a good male buddy. We were both with other people & didn't want to upset them in anyway. So we never did anything outside of work.. We would buy lunch & head back for work & chat about video games in the lunchroom. Not once did we see eachother outside of work & thats how we liked it as it didn't feel right & knew it would upset others. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/2/2006 11:57:17 AM | | I guess it just depends. Almost all of my friends are men, and pretty much the only people I go out with, but I'm not sleeping with any of them. So for me, it's totally true. I've always been better friends with guys than with girls. So to me it is no big deal. But- I have had boyfriends who became jealous when I go out with my male friends, but I think it is a bit ridiculous, and I'm not going to quit hanging out with friends that I have had for years just because my boyfriend is jealous- that's stupid. My friends would do anything for me, and vice versa, and that's just how it is. If I were you, I'd be more nervous if it was like one or two girls than more- if is a bunch, he probably just likes being around girls. But I am not a man, so I can't say what a man's opinion would be. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/4/2006 12:08:26 AM | sure they can...
I have a few female friends...
as long as neither is sexually attracted to the other...
if one of them is attracted to the other...
then I would say that makes it hard...
if not impossible...
side note:
who ever I'm dating... is usually my best friend...
why would you ever want to date someone who
you think is second best...
or thinks you are second best? | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/5/2006 5:03:56 PM | i personally would love to be friends with a guy and have it just be friends so i can ask him for advice on men and just be open with him with out him staring at my breasts
but every guy friend i had something sexual always happe ns or at least the thought comes cross a few times and you try to avoid it but it always comes up
i think men and woman can be friends only if they are not attracted to each other | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/5/2006 6:52:57 PM | From a personal perspective...I believe it depends completely on why either party wants to hang out with those friends, how long those friends have been involved prior to your relationship and whether or not it was discussed in advance.
My personal opinion is that if you had those friends prior to your relationship and you did not have any sexual relations with those friends, then it should not be an issue. If there was any sexual history, then I feel that the motivations for keeping such friends could be questioned and certainly there may be a trust issue.
For myself...I keep my same-sex friends activity specific, either through work, transit, or specific activities that my bf does not enjoy, or if I want to go out with them to something that my bf could enjoy and take me to, then either I go with my bf only or my bf and my friend's gf / Sign Other / Wife is invited, etc. This should be expressed prior to the relationship starting so that your mate knows what to expect.
You would also have to question why he "needs" so many same-sex "friends". If you do not enjoy a lot of the activities he does, then perhaps evaluate compatibility. If there is an opportunity to include you and he chooses not to, then it is likely that he is hanging on to the best of both worlds...being single and being in a relationship. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/5/2006 7:12:00 PM | women can be friends with a man and not have sex but most men when friends with a women have alterior motives sorry but its the truth !
I dont have any girl friends all my friends are guys and i dont sleep with them but if givin the oppertunity im sure they would sleep with me because men are men  | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/5/2006 7:44:23 PM | | Yes, it's possible for men and women to be friends without sex. I have several close female friends who are not sex parterers, and probably will never be. One in particular is a very close friend I have known for about 14 years now. We talk on the phone every day or two, have lunch together several times a week and hang out together in the evenings a few times a month. I'll admit that early on I had hopes that our relationship would evolve into something more than just friendship, but it never happened. Eventually you just accept that fact and look elsewhere for the sex. It's great to have a really close friend of the opposite sex. We've known each other long enough that we can tell each other anything and discuss any subject with total honesty and without embarrassment. I can talk with her about my relationships and get the female perspective on them, and she talks to me about her relationships and I give her the male perspective. It's great. I'm still as attracted to her as ever, but now I wouldn't want to screw up our friendship by trying to take it to the next level. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/5/2006 7:49:03 PM | | I have plenty of male friends. They are more like brothers to me. They are protective of me ... and interested in my "dating experiences" ... in a brotherly sort of way. I would never consider having sex with them. It would just be wrong! Not to mention what it would do to our friendship. I think it's a kind of respect for each other that ... would be "cheapened" if we ever had sex. So ... yes ... men and women can be friends without sex... definitely. I'm grateful for my male friends ... they are good to me and I enjoy their company. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/5/2006 8:02:54 PM | | I have many female friends that I cherish as friends very much. A couple have been the "sisters" that I never had in real life (only child - mom was unable to have more kids). Someone I can go to & talk to about anything - about my struggles in the dating scene, whatever. I think that if my "significant other" had male acquaintances & friends, that's to be expected (coworkers, friends from school, friends of family members, whatever). It's a matter of trust between a couple. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/7/2006 12:22:38 PM | It really all depends on the person. I have very good/close female friends ranging in age 29-38 and we are just friends. I find the quips from men with a nudge nudge rather amuzing. THey think I am sleeping with all of them but I guess that is why I am choosy about my male friends as opposed to my female ones.
All in all, men and women can be just friends, I think!! | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/7/2006 12:47:35 PM | | I would say it is fine for him to hang out with other women if he has been friends with them for a while. If he is meeting more after he started dating you, you got a problem. If anything don't make him choose between you or them. You can choose to leave him, but if you make him decide that can be trouble. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/7/2006 1:32:27 PM | | exactly, it can be done. most of my friends are guys. I don't feel the least bit attracted to them, they are like brothers. I'm sure it's crossed everyones mind who is in a friendship like this, but most of the time no one would act on it. Friends are friends, boyfriends are boyfriends, they aren't both. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/7/2006 7:08:32 PM | ^^^^^^
My ex husband and I are best friends. Friday night I had drinks with him and his new girlfriend (and I didn't have sex with either of them! LOLOLOL.) I have 4 men friends that I do things with all the time. All but one of them is in a long term relationship. I've never slept with any of them, and haven't slept with my ex since he left home. The argument (here in forums) that always comes up is that they secretly want to sleep with me...I don't know if that is true or not, if it is true ~ those must be some frustrated men!! I do wonder why this question is asked so often. My closest friends have always been male ~ I guess it's what I am used to.  | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/8/2006 12:32:46 AM | | Tell him how you feel. If your ok with it fine, if not then do the same to him, even if its not true. You should'nt have to feel like a doormat ya' know. | |
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Ka!ika
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Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 349 | |
| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/8/2006 12:45:51 AM | | I have a question for anyone who thinks it is not possible to have friends "of the opposite sex" without having sex....By saying "opposite sex" i can assume we mean people who we attracted to instinctively and would (possibly) have sex with (just to broaden the field a bit...) Well I am bisexual so if i can't have platonic friends without having sex with them does this mean that I have sex (or want to) with all my friends? Of course not! I have had friends that I've been attracted to yet would never sleep with (or anything physical) for a variety of reasons...I've had these kind of relationships with sexual tension involved that just makes for a fun relationship. I've had friends that I may love to pieces as friends but have absolutely no attraction for whatsoever. Basically (and a few people have already made this point but it is the most important so I'll say it again :) it just depends on the person. Some people can have platonic friendships, some can't. Use your judgement and intuition to figure out the situation. However....it is sooo important to remember that a relationship needs respect so if there is a situation that you are uncomfortable with and you are ignored and made to feel foolish...there is something wrong with that relationship for sure...whether or not he has any feelings or attraction for the other person! | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 5/10/2006 2:15:38 PM | | I have a few female friends. One who I had a relationship with for a few years and we are very good friends. If you both understand that it is a friendship, and only that, and the reasons why it couldn't be anything else, than you can. We know each other very well and that is why we can be good friends. There are no secrets. The women I am good friends with that I did not have a relationship with, I met on a first date and we realized that we weren't mean't to be mates for life but friends we could be. It really isn't that hard. It's all about trust. If you trust your mate, you don't even think of things like this. | |
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