| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/21/2006 11:31:12 PM |
Yes this is very possible I have had many guy friends who were just that "friends" we would go out to the movies, play pool, go for a drink, go to the beach etc and just hung out. Sex was never brought up we were just close freinds and it was great.
So if you were to hang out with one of your friends one night, and you started taking off his clothes while you whispered the things you wanted to do to him, he wouldn't be Johnny-on-the-spot? I don't know them, but I have a pretty good idea of the answer..... | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/22/2006 2:55:51 AM | LOL this is a good one.............
chicks can be friends with who ever they want, but we all know that if a guy likes a woman there will be ALWAYS a little voice in the back of our heads that wants nothing more then to wreck our friendship by doing the deed with them
I have seen it so many times....... | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/22/2006 3:46:27 AM |
chicks can be friends with who ever they want, but we all know that if a guy likes a woman there will be ALWAYS a little voice in the back of our heads that wants nothing more then to wreck our friendship by doing the deed with them
I have seen it so many times.......
I don't think I agree. The difference is that guys usually have it in their mind at the beginning of a friendship that they want more. From what I have seen, most girls want friendship in the beginning, but then if/when they have problems with their relationship, they turn to somebody else for attention.... and it's usually one of her guy friends.
Men and women can be friends without sex, but there have to be boundaries. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/24/2006 10:09:29 PM | | That is only possible if there is zero attraction between the two. Usually the man will have some attraction for the woman. If this is the case, he is only setting himself up for a lot of unncessary hurt and frustration. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/27/2006 3:18:41 PM | Yes I CAN.. and do!!...it all depends if you are a social person or not...(remember the schoolyard??) we are talking about social skills here....if you limit your friendships to one person of the opposite sex than you you've limited yourself to possible friendships, thats all.
It's your comfort zone. I go dancing and I dance with men...doesn't mean I'm going to have sex with them. I also belonged to a club male/female and we all go out with each other to the beach, movies too...doesn't mean we have sex. Several of my male friends and I have never slept with each other and we talk about everything. I went and helped him move out of his storage recently. Up North, my friend needed a ride to the hospital and I was there for him. If you take classes and courses you form friendships, people at work, that do like to go out, will form friendships, (others just go home to sit alone to play on the computer complaining they are lonely)...some people don't have the skills so lets leave them alone...to each their own!
It is possible to have men and women be friends without sex and thats my final answer!  | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/27/2006 3:21:12 PM | | sometimes but not often does it work and put in the right situation, amount of alcohol, emotions whatever and it's When Harry Met Sally all over but without the great ending..just a messed up friendship. Or it could go the other way where whenever one or both need comfort you "console" one another, but generally someone falls and someone gets hurt after a while. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/27/2006 3:27:26 PM | | ahhh Rocky...if you had a chick that had male friends, she would be more accepting of her boyfriend having female friends...nes pas?? One only accepts what one understands and knows. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/27/2006 3:44:52 PM | I agree with Tyric and Jesiebunnies.
I don't have a problem being with a guy who has had a long time female friend. But how I'm going to respond to her will depend on how she treats me. I was with a guy for 3 1/2 years who had a really good friend. She would come to the house to visit and I really liked her. She never made me feel like I was just his girlfriend. She treated me as her friend and I her. I never felt that I had to feel threatened by her.
When you're in a relationship there is a fine line to having friends of the opposite sex outside the relationship. Afterall, your partner should be your best friend. If you need someone outside the relationship to talk to, then that says there are communication problems in the relationship. If you care at all about your partner and relationship, then you better get your priorities straight and get talking. Being able to communicate your feelings with your loved one is the biggest MUST in any relationship.
As for being friends with a member of the opposite gender without sex, I say yes it is definitely possible. I've had a "best friends" relationship a few times. They are/were my buds.
Oh sure, maybe it started out that they would've liked to have more but we kept it strictly as friends. Sometimes the chemistry is there for friendship but not sexually. I must say, I've really enjoyed having these guys as friends. For me, these "friends" relationships were the way romantic relationships should be without all the garbage.
And when I tell people that my male friend and I are "just friends", I mean, "we are just friends!" There are no fringe benefits of kissing, holding hands or things like that. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/29/2006 6:06:12 PM | | I have lots of friends that are men that I don't have anything romantic with. It does happen. I guess I look at it this way. ... If that person was in your life before your boyfriend came along you should still have him in your life. Take your mate out to go along with you and your friend. Boyfriends and girlfriends come and go .... but your true friends are there to stay. I wouldn't want my friends to dump me everytime they dated a new person. I have girlfriends that do that and I think that is so rude. Then they break up with the guy and expect you to still be there and be their buddy. Which you are... cause like I said... a true friend is there for you. That goes for either sex. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/29/2006 6:52:21 PM | | Of course we can. We're not completely without respect and restraint, are we?? My best friend is a man, and would never dream of him being anything other than my friend. Mutual respect is key, and testosterone/estrogen does NOT rule every relationship!! I dont have to "make sure" to make time for my friends, I would never ditch them for a guy. Couple time is important, but friends are just as important, if not more. | |
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Solkin
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Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 513 | |
| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/29/2006 7:01:34 PM | Yes! We Can... 
One of my best friends in highschool was female, and we had a very good "friend" relationship. Still do for that matter. I even went out with her best friend, and not once did anything escalate between us, to the point of being anything other than just friends. She is now married and has 3 kids, and we are still great friends to this day.
Those who say it can't be done, need to grow up, plain and simple.  | |
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fishe
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Joined: 6/25/2006
Msg: 514 | |
| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/29/2006 11:27:02 PM | | Yes.... even after the sex, some hurt and some pain... if there's still respect there can be a friendship and a good supportive one at that. Not in all cases but if you've ever experienced it... it is the best of all friends. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 12:22:03 AM | qoute: Those who say it can't be done, need to grow up, plain and simple.
Bravo.
To those that have wonderful friendships with the opposite sex and have for years (I have male friends for over 15 years) - with no hanky panky - and actually respect eachother - bravo.
Its no point in arguing with people who think it cannot be done. Maybe all they think about is sex and that is the most important in any realtionship - don't know. But I never ever have thought about sleeping with my male friends. Even had a few crash on my couch when we were drunk - so the alcohol excuse is proved wrong.
so this thread has been going on way too long -and probly will keep going on - might make a record on pof. Another one of those agree to disagree threads.
(BTW - after sex- doesn't make you friends anymore - its ex lovers. There is a boundary and once you step over it - things are never ever the same - no matter how both parties pretend it to be - been there - done that - know what I am talking about) | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 3:31:43 AM |
(BTW - after sex- doesn't make you friends anymore - its ex lovers. There is a boundary and once you step over it - things are never ever the same - no matter how both parties pretend it to be - been there - done that - know what I am talking about)
When you say that things "are never the same", aren't you doing the same thing as those people who say that men and women can't be just friends? You've come to a conclusion based on your own experience. But this thread is full of men and women who, based on their experience, are saying that it is impossible to not have sex put strain on the relationship.
And just to be clear, I think it is possible. I just think it's a lot more complicated than a lot of women want to think it is. If I had a nickel for every "brother" who secretly wanted more, or for every girl who later on developed feelings for a "brother" when her own relationship got dysfunctional.... I'd have a lot of nickels. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 3:32:29 AM |
(BTW - after sex- doesn't make you friends anymore - its ex lovers. There is a boundary and once you step over it - things are never ever the same - no matter how both parties pretend it to be - been there - done that - know what I am talking about)
When you say that things "are never the same", aren't you doing the same thing as those people who say that men and women can't be just friends? You've come to a conclusion based on your own experience. But this thread is full of men and women who, based on their experience, are saying that it is impossible to not have sex put strain on the relationship.
And just to be clear, I think it is possible. I just think it's a lot more complicated than a lot of women want to think it is. If I had a nickel for every "brother" who secretly wanted more, or for every girl who later on developed feelings for a "brother" when her own relationship got dysfunctional.... I'd have a lot of nickels. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 4:24:04 AM | It,s funny, but it,s my older son,s say a man and women cant be friends with out sex. Mabey they can,t , and mabey when I was their age I didnt think that either, but now being at this age , that I am  I know it,s possiable. Sex is not the most important part of making a relationship, mabey in keeping it when it gets even to that point  but in the begining I love to tell them They are wrong. Lisa | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 12:35:41 PM | | Yes, yes, and , yes. I have mainly male friends in my life and for most of them there is nothing sexual about it. There have been the odd ones where we started off sleeping together but in the end found we made way better friends. It has made previous exes very insecure but I look at things quite differently from that. I mean for me it is a case of if I was gonna sleep with one of them I am pretty sure it would have happened before I got together with someone not once I was hooked up. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 1:04:10 PM | Sure. I have all kinds of male friends and I only sleep with one of them. He's not my 'boyfriend' -- he's a friend that's a boy who I sleep with.
Some I just toke with. Others I talk to. Whatever.
When any of the ones I'm not sleeping with hook up with a girl and was she to feel uncomfortable about me I'd step aside and smoke or talk to somebody else.
That part is easy for me. It's when I actually have to get a boyfriend myself and I start getting feelings for them that I start acting messed up.
Everyone says I should learn to play the game -- play my cards right etc. Problem is that my male friends and I wouldn't have any fun then because we enjoy laughing our asses off at the women who think they won.
Sometimes I wish I was a boy. It would be so much easier. I wouldn't have to explain how I believe getting down on my knees is pretty darn affectionate and then stand by and watch while the guys who said they didn't want a relationship run off within 6 months and play married with children.
Well, maybe I would. But maybe I'd feel bad about it. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/2/2006 10:04:32 AM | It's totally possible, but it's up to the guy to seriously decide he dosent want to try to push the relationship in that direction.
There's also something to be said for attraction. if you don't find them phsyically attractive it's hard to want to have sex. You know w female who's such a great person you can talk to them until 3 in the morning but if you don't want to have sex with them you just don't. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/2/2006 3:42:33 PM | Yes. It takes a girl that doesn't what to have sex with the guy and guy that can handle that. I have a female roomate she's hott. She doesn't want to have sex with me and that's fine. If I was an ass hole we wouldn't be friends and if wanted to have sex with me we wouldn't be friends. So, that the mixture I think it takes. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/3/2006 6:27:25 AM | My best friend is a guy. I get along better with most men then I do women... I don't think it's the "sex" factor that enables men/women to get a long... it's the connection, the relativity, the common ground etc...
I find between a male/female relationship if both people are HONEST then yes a great friendship can be had. If one trys to befriend the other with secret desires to win their affections (or get laid) then um, no.... not so much of a good friendship do I see!! All I see then is BS, drama and games... *smiles* | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/3/2006 6:54:00 AM | Of course they can..most of my friends are females..I didnt "buck" any of them....though the thought may have crossed my mind sometimes.....good thing I didnt move back north...oh boy! | |
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