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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/12/2005 6:22:07 PM | Two points:
One....perhaps it is possible that some women don't fantasize about having sex with their friends (highly unlikely) but their guy friends are definitely beating off dreaming about them. There are a lot of guys lusting after "friends" who would never touch them but just because they will never get it doesn't mean they aren't thinking about it.
Two....for the OP, if you suspect something is wrong and your "Spidey Senses" are tingling, chances are there is something wrong about buddy and his "girlfriends". There is nothing more alluring to many women than a guy who is already taken - this too will be denied vociferously but it doesn't mean it isn't true. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/12/2005 6:27:12 PM | I think we can absolutely be friends. Unless you havesome hidden agenda of course. If people are honest..yes for sure. I do have many male friends that are totally platonic..however i do keep them a safe distance as to not enrage my possesive husband..lol...
He feels that men and women cant be friends...Truthfully all that told me was that HE cant be just friends with a woman....hmmmmmm
I find that possesive people who go on and accuse and are jelous and thing that way, are usually the ones who are up to no good...
Anyone agree? | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/12/2005 6:27:51 PM | t d & h Eww, in agreement with fox. I'm thinking of some of my male friends, and I'd rather think NOT!!! Does this qualify as too much info?? hahaha
OT: Yes men and woman can be friends with NO sex involved, but I'm having a problem trying to block my visuals after td & h's post...hahaha | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/12/2005 7:15:27 PM | Sorry ladies, the truth rarely comes in a pretty package...lol
@Nawty...I think women who surround themselves with male "friends" are simply living in denial about knowing damn well those guys want to see you naked. I think such people get off on the attention and the not so hidden signs of desire. Take a brief stroll through the forum and tell me I'm wrong. This place is chock full of men who swear up and down that they haven't had sex in years, how they appreciate a woman for her mind and spirit and not just her body and how they prefer to just cuddle....ever seen the 500 hottest list?
Do a test, put up that you are happily married and NOT looking for anything but platonic friends with no pic. Then put up a pic with you looking sad and frumpy, maybe reading a book. Then a week or so later, put up one with you in a very low cut top or just your bra even. Don't bother to report back about what the responses will be like, every single one of us already knows the answer. I'll tell you this much, it ain't twelve perverts sending emails over and over again to the same women....that is what guys do.
Obviously, there are exceptions. Some men are capable (mostly only temporarily) of overcoming their true nature but only some. No, this does not include ALL of your friends!
Oh and btw...most of my closest female friends were once lovers. Of the others, even the ones I don't find particularly attractive...yes it does cross my mind from time to time. I know it is true because I am a guy, we talk about these things when you aren't there. I have also never cheated on a woman and don't expect I ever shall....I've had plenty of really short relationships but I have never cheated.
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/12/2005 7:45:55 PM | Heh.
Ok, Yes, men and women CAN be friends without sex....
but the women think the men are happy with the arrangement...
and the men think
"maybe,
just maybe,
.
.
.
I have a chance."
Simple experiment. your male friend for years, the one you've been hanging with who is your best buddy.... make a serious pass at him, and see what happens.
there are exceptions, for instance, if neither finds the other attractive in any way, then lasting friendships can happen.
If you are his buddies wife or serious girlfriend, or a nun, or otherwise off limits... then guilt and honor come into play, and tend to help keep things platonic.
If your father has taken your friend aside, and showed him his shotgun, and discussed how easy it is for him to hide a body... your friend will likely always be courteous.
but even with those examples, make a serious pass, and watch chaos reign. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/12/2005 8:39:59 PM | I think if your attracted to them .. as a man you will always be thinking about there cookies and how to get them..
if your not attracted to them, sure.. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 12:24:11 AM | .
Of course I am friends with women. They are half of the human population. But, I am not in a relationship.
I have met women who have many men “friends” in their life they want to keep. When that happens, my natural, easy-going nature just tells the gal: "y’all have a good time, hear!” And I walk away -- never to look back at her with any love interest again.
Simply put, if we are a couple, most of our friends will also be couples. And, we will meet them together, as a couple.
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 12:55:46 AM | | Of course men and women can be "friends". But if you are in another monogamous relationship, its crossing the line to "go out alone" together. Thats the cutoff, and I am no expert, so ask a relationship counselor. Let us know what they say. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 4:17:50 AM | | I have never in my life had a male friend that didn't try to get into my pants or say he has "more than friends feelings" for me sooner or later. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 7:58:07 AM | | Men, and women, can be friends without sex. However, once a guy has a romantic/sexual relationship with one woman, she should get most of his attention, and his platonic pals should be placed on the back burner. He can talk to his 'friends only' women on the phone, or see them in person, over coffee, while with his lover, so his lover can see that there is nothing going on between him, and the platonics. It's possible that your BF was cheating, but it is also possible that he was not. You should trust more, and he should have been more considerate of your feelings. The two of you were ill-suited to one another, and it is good that he is an ex. Keep it that way, and find a more considerate guy. As for me, I have several platonic pals...women who are, and will always be, 'just friends'. I chat with them often, but I currently have no lover. Once I find a lover, I will converse with her more, and the platonic pals less. I currently have all the platonic pals I need, and am not looking for more. What I want, now, is a 'friend plus lover'...a woman who can be: a friend, a lover, a companion, a hobby-buddy, a life partner, etc, all rolled into one. Wanting that does not make me a jerk, or a sexist pig, or a monster. I can be a friend without having sex, but currently have all of that type of relationship that I want. Now I am looking for a friend who will also be a sex partner, and women who don't want sex can look to someone other than me for what they want. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 8:16:44 AM | It depends on the person...
I have many male friends (more male than female) - and thats just what they are - friends. In fact I am closer to a couple of them than my female ones. The only thing that happend is a kiss at new years, thats it. Even though I have a deal with one that if we are both not married when we are 45 - we are going to get hiched lol.
I have had boyfriends that couldn't handle it - but I made sure that when I went out - that the person I am seeing would meet them.
On the other side of the coin, i have had boyfriends who I trusted with their female friends, and shouldn't have. Especially when I call there and he is in bed with one of them.
It all depends on the person and how much they can be trusted. | |
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dud
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Joined: 9/9/2005
Msg: 69 | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 9:46:25 AM | | Bingo "blu eyed gal"...some of those "friends" will wait around forever for "you" to make that move they've been waiting soooooo long for....and some of those "friends" just don't have the patience and eventually put that "more than friends feelings" out there. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 9:55:20 AM | I think friends of the opposite sex is b.s or people are naive. Or in denial. There is no such thing as a completely platonic relationship between opposite sex friends. One day, when you are both on the floor putting together a puzzle, putting your heads together to solve something, your scents are exchanged, his head turns towards yours, your eyes meet, and that primordial urge will rear its ugly head. Don't fool yourselves. It happens to "friends" everyday. Hell, it has even been known to happen between two straight women. (No problem there) The only truly safe friendship is two straight guys. Rest assured, they won't be humping each other if their eyes meet.  | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 10:24:53 AM | | I happen to have 2 male friends and no,,we dont nor have we ever had sex. IVe had them over here for BBQ's or they'll just drop by to say 'hey'. No biggy. Actually when i was in my late teens to early 20's, i had 3 male friends that we used to just hang out and go cruising with. I had a bf at one point and they all told me they thought he was wrong for me and guess what,,he was. lol But hell yeah,,men and women CAN be friends with no sex. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 10:27:52 AM | between two straight women
Life is not a cheezy porno\
Maybe you cannot be just friends with a woman
but a lot of people do not have that problem. Unless you are a always horny - it can be done.
Ex. In another thread it is said that you have to be attracted to the person to sleep with them...
I am not attracted to my best friends, and my male friends, we have surpassed that. I love them - and respect them - but I don't want to jump their bones...
Its called control and respect. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 10:27:57 AM | I was naive for a while. I thought men and women could be friends with out sex...........that, of course, was until I found out my husband (at the time) was sleeping with his "friend" he used to hang out with from work. I think if 2 people are in a committed relationship, it's not necessary to have friends of the opposite sex. Especially since your partener should be your best friend, and with that said, you would probably want to do a lot together and hang out with friends together as well. | |
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| Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 9/13/2005 10:29:50 AM | It's also possible to walk a tightwire without a net.  But is it smart? No. It's dangerous. The potential is there and that creates an unhealthy environment. It would for me. | |
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