BPMG
| Joined: 8/26/2005 Msg: 51 | |
| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/9/2005 12:45:33 PM | @belle-6 - I believe you have come to the right place to make friends. If you haven't found so yet, I'm sure you will notice that whether people agree with you or not many of them will respect the decisions you make.
Word of caution though, these forums are very addictive.
Chuck | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/9/2005 12:55:45 PM | Yeah, I would be pissed off too.I hate "shoppers" they annoy me. But that's what I want in a relationship, not what is right 4 everybody.so there are always 2 sides to everystory. I hope ya'll work things out if at all possible! | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/10/2005 2:23:13 PM | With the state of relationships today, I'm not surprised. People treat relationships like cars. You're always eyeing that new model you saw zip by you. Or maybe you just want a test-drive and not really serious about commiting to it. Look at some of the threads here - "contact made but evaporated" Maybe he's just enjoying the flattery. It's not like he's cruising bars with his buddies - it's POF!! I'm not single but it doesn't stop me from chatting with people here. My gf knows and trusts me and as do I with her.
You've rushed to judgment. | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/10/2005 2:29:35 PM | | I personally think we should start a yahoo group listing these slime balls (could be men or women) and their profile names. I too would want to be warned and commend you for thinking of warning them. Fear not you can and also deserve much better than the likes of a liar. | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/10/2005 3:12:09 PM | | I totally respect her for warning the other women. A LOT of men continue to look for something BETTER while they are seeing someone. How naive are you? Men are men! If you think a man is up to inosence talking to other women....open your eyes. If he found the ONE who truely makes him happy he would'nt need the other women for ANYTHING. | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/10/2005 4:22:28 PM | | Terr480: for whatever reason, fate has brought me nothing but female friends. I want male friends too but I don't know why I'm not clicking with guy's...I'm told I'm hilarious at party's but that's where the friendship ends. Whatever; but, my gf has met many of my female friends. My gf trusts me and is mature enough to understand that I NEED my friends almost as much as I need her. I trust her with her male friends....if one of us makes a mistake then we'll cross that bridge when we get there. No pre-emptive strike's against my friends are allowed. She has to either trust me or not trust me - I gave her the choice and that's why she's my gf (answered correctly). | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/10/2005 6:49:40 PM | Sierrasman..."There's a BIG difference between actively seeking someone while you are living with someone else and talking to someone while being broken up. He is trying to shift the blame onto you to try and cover up his own guilt and deceit. This guy is a royal loser. And the kind of idiot that makes some women think ALL men are jerks. Guys like this make it hard for the good guys. "
Amen...I don't get how some people can excuse bad behavior, there must have been some kind of commitment since they were living together. | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/11/2005 1:20:50 AM | The difference between paranoia and betrayal is ‘evidence’. I don’t know what prompted you to check. I can only assume some gut feelings (anyone should listen to those voices) or just pure divine intervention has, very likely, spared you from some nastier consequences in the future. Likely, if he was looking for a good woman, he eventually was going to meet her/them. Meeting in real life might have not been the original intention, but it seems to me, it is the natural progression to keep the highs high.
As for being in male’s nature to cheat, who do they cheat with? Do you really think that all women who are ‘looking’ are ‘unattached’???? As they say, men are from earth, women are from earth, deal with it. There are good men out there, as there are good women out there, who, if for nothing else than respecting themselves, they will respect the one they are with. I don’t think it is so much a matter of gender (though some books use it to give jerks, of both sex, an excuse) as it is about standards and values each person embraces. There’s nothing wrong with chatting, having coffee, doing activities with friends of the opposite sex. When those things are kept secret and denied, then there’s more to it than just our freedom to be ourselves. Privacy is not secrecy. Secrecy is not freedom, in fact, I think it is the opposite. It sounds like an oxymoron = freedom and hiding?
I am very sorry for your pain. I can only say what others already posted, that whatever he is/was doing, has nothing to do with you or who you are. It is about him and his issues. Maybe you can talk it over with him and resolve it, and take the relationship to a stronger level, even while you keep your decision of moving out?.
Good luck Trix
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/11/2005 3:36:48 AM | Wrashcallyrabbit, You seem to be a smart woman, there a not so many around out there.
I just ended in a war of the roses with a girl living in Florida for no reason but her constantly thinking I cheat on her. Don't get me wrong; I'm not a Saint. I was in relationships almost my whole adult life and Sex was just Sex, never told my one night stands something else than I will be a one night stand. yes I fooled around a lot but I never wanted to trade my Partner. Of course I did hurt some girls with this.
And then, when I started this last relationship, I promised myself not to do this anymore. I’m 40 now and I had my share off fooling around, so I didn’t this time. But still, I’m a liar in her opinion.
Sorry for wasting your time, I just got mad.
PS: your pic’s look good, so does your Profile. Seems to me that you would be a good Partner. | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/11/2005 3:52:46 AM | Been there!
Same person, several times.
All started when I became paranoid about why certain people were saying rather unsuitable things to my (now ex) girlfriend.
Installed something to see what was being said. Found out passwords. Went snooping, found a whole heap of stuff I didn't like.
Forgave her that time.
But it happened again and nearly ended up in her meeting someone else for romantic purposes.
In the end (after 2 years of playing cat and mouse) I got fed up and ditched her for someone else. That didn't last, but it was a case of "now you know how I feel"! | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/11/2005 4:54:16 AM | That's crazy! The first time I checked out this site, I found a profile that my sister's fiancee posted for himself looking for casual sex.
What the hell? | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/11/2005 5:27:57 AM | | People in general are pigs when it comes to relationships any more they dont stay married they screw around on one another. Men and women alike. Yahoo is bad about that kinda stuff I talked to a man from January till July and just found out that he is married. If it is his wife that I am talking to now or it could still be him. His profiles were deleted one day so I sent him a email to his gmail asking why and thats when I got a reply back that he is married and that she has found out a lot of things about her husband in the past 2 weeks. I was falling for this man too thats what hurts after talking for 7 months. He was the kinda guy that would tell you stuff and after talking to her some of it was true and some of it wasnt he had 3 kids she said he did, he said he was a retired navy seal cause he blew out his knee well he was a seal but he got discharged for punching a officer in the face I guess and yes he messed up his knee but it was back when he was 14. I just dont under stand why people arent honest any more!!!!!! If it was me that he was talking to the bf that was whoring around on here I would want to be contacted and told that he has a gf and not be led on any more. | |
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Siera
| Joined: 9/6/2005 Msg: 65 | |
| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/11/2005 5:53:44 AM | Thats funny, cuz just this week I caught my boyfriend on this site doing the very thing and confronted him and of course he freaked and broke it off with me as well. 
So if you come across (Sleepy9327) on here avoid him or give him something to write home about, lol  | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/11/2005 6:36:21 PM | I say all cheaters should be announced! I would want to know if my guy was cheating. When I found a phone number on scratch paper and called it. Turns out my ex had called her after getting her number from a chatroom meeting. He told her he was single and looking.... well now he is!
I also know that he goes into yahoo chatrooms and sets up lots of meetings with girls... some are overnighters and none know about the others.... how do you warn them? They would think I was just the sour grapes ex!
I posted him on cheatersnews.com just to warn other women. If I get with someone and should know that he is a cheater..... let me know PLEASE!
thank you | |
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Hkane
| Joined: 7/22/2005 Msg: 68 | |
| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/11/2005 7:53:15 PM | That really freaking SUX! I am so sorry that you had to find out that WAY but thank goodness you found out. Hopefully when you emerge from this you will feel cleansed and believe me, he will be stuck with the people on this site which while some are probably nice, normal people ... most have more issues than reader's digest. I went on a couple of dates with a guy who I met on here who seemd like prince charming. HE did not look as good as his photo [which hid the hair plugs] he seemed so funny and easy going until the mask came off and the insanity started. Amazing -- but hang in there girlfriend!!! Again... I'm so sorry you had to go through this!
~Hill | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/11/2005 8:13:37 PM | | belle...maybe he wanted to get caught and this was just a cry for help. yknow....help, help..i am a cheating manwhore.haha. | |
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Siera
| Joined: 9/6/2005 Msg: 71 | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/12/2005 8:17:57 AM | This is a copy of my reply to someone who emailed me (name withheld for a change) Basically the guy said what goes around comes around and I deserved it for cheating first. My reply to this resounding message from a few:
Hi, thanks for putting that message nicely but I didn't cheat on him. We broke up at the time I wrote those emails/ reached out to someone else. He was so awful to me that I left him and decided to date again. Then he begged me back and I completely cut off the nice guy to be with my boyfriend. I guess one would say - that's what you get for not choosing the good guy. There will always be reasons to blame the hurt individual for someone else's inconsiderate behavior. I don't accept the blame. | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/12/2005 8:27:55 AM | Thanks Chuck...you remind me to really thank all you wonderful folks who replied - whether you agreed with me or not. At least you acknowledge my pain. I hope none of you have to experience this -EVER. Nobody deserves to be treated this way especially if you're as good a partner as I am. I can't begin to tell you how supportive I've been of him and how giving of my time and energy so he'd be secure in our relationship. Believe it or not, he's the one with the insecurity issues and always had to be up under me to know I'm not cheating. One moment alone and he assumes I don't want him and goes looking to protect his heart. That's what happened when we broke up a year ago when I lived in another state and saw him on weekends only. He assumed I had someone where I lived even though there was no reason for him to think that. I found out he was on the prowl so I broke up with him then. He begged me back and I gave him another chance. I moved with him to nyc because I got pregnant and he was ultra insecure about our relationship. I miscarried and we became very close after that experience. This relationship has been the most tumultuous.
Although I'm still looking for a place I have to share his for now. We barely speak to each other and he just throws up in my face how he doesn't trust me! HA! | |
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| Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish Posted: 9/12/2005 8:45:10 AM | Wowza.. I'm so sorry for your pain! It is scary how the internet has helped cheaters Evolve!
There is a guy out here that has 2 profiles up.... ONE has a pic of he and his girlfriend and he states that he has a gf but is looking for a new one... he states that he has found it is EASIER to get a new one while you still have one! He goes on about his motorcycle and how he has an extra helmit.... HIS GIRLFRIENDS but it can be yours! OMG like... what a treasure that man is! It was so hard for me not to be turned on and to hold myself back from contacting him!
Isn't that meant for job searches? It's easier to find one when you already have one?
I would be totally devistated if I found someone I was in a serious relationship...... was online searching...... I don't even want to understand how this crap happens!
Best of luck to you! | |
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