| I have a question
Posted: 10/21/2005 10:26:10 AM |
Depends... diapers? I don't wear those so I guess I'm ok.
Hey, I wear those at parties so I can spend more time at the keg, is that a medical condition?...LOL | |
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| my opinion ( we all have one )
Posted: 10/21/2005 10:56:38 AM | It depends: maybe the persona is a cross-dresser, maybe they are
bi-sexual, or have a serious mental illness. Maybe they have a terminal
condition. I wouldn't date any of those people...my personality is
not conducive to that kind of relationship. | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/21/2005 11:35:50 AM | I have been on other dating sites and I am a nurse. I have gotten emails from guys who have medical conditions and disabilities ... it starts out:
"Wow ... a nurse, boy do I need a nurse!"
I try to look past that statement and see the person. As with any relationship, one should try friendship first. So I agree to the friendship ... I become this guy's friend.
We all have our comfort zones, and I never know what that is with any given person until I get to know them. To be honest, if I find a that a man is disabled or has a severe medical condition, I might or might not want to actually date him.
There are too many factors that play into that ... it's not a question that can be easily answered with a "yes" or "no".
Certainly, I do not want to be targeted by men with medical problems just because I'm a nurse. On the other hand, with medical training, one might be more in a position to determine immediately if this is something they think might want to get involved with.
I dunno.
I have single nurse friends who have straight out said that they deal with that stuff all day at work and do not want to go home to it. I guess they have already decided that would exceed their comfort zone.
Does make me wonder what they would do if their "life partner" suddenly developed a severe medical condtion ... what would they do then? Hmmmmmmmm........ | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/21/2005 11:48:21 AM | I work directly with deaf/blind individuals with multiple physical and sometimes mental disabilities. And of course not everyone is the same. Some may have a severity of problems that may make them incapable of a relationship other than friendship.
But I am not against these types of relationships. I have made some awesome friends with people with many disabilites, but the majority are deaf. I consider them to be great friends of mine. I feel blessed that they have come in to my life and God has blessed me with the opportunity to learn their language (signing) and I enjoy it immensely.
Everyone has impairements or disabilities. Just so happens that God keeps them a little closer to his heart.
Deb. | |
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| my opinion ( we all have one )
Posted: 10/23/2005 1:00:31 PM | My ex was a diabetic. Most don't tend to think of that as a disability. Well -------- I could write a book. He passed at 43. Ask and I will then tell
I had a severe car accident in april, broke neck, collar bone and arm. All has healed except arm. So Have some physical therapy. Am not l00% how much of a disability is that? What do you tell someone other than the truth?
Love is blind. That is the answer. What can you deal with?
Trish | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/23/2005 3:02:05 PM | | Yeh, I guess I'd date myself...I get disability here because of a brain injury last summer which resulted in surgery, induced coma, 2 month hospital stay. I have a seizure disorder which is totally controlled with Dilantin, and minor memory/concentration issues. Stress is tough for me too. I am HONEST with people about it - and whatever they decide to do is up to them. I am powerless over other people. I try to meet women that have good character - things like honesty, open - mindedness, and a true desire to help others. No problems whatsoever thus far. Enjoy the day all, from South Florida. Ben. | |
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c7t1
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Joined: 9/17/2005
Msg: 34 | |
| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/23/2005 9:40:56 PM | "Wow ... a nurse, boy do I need a nurse!"
But this my main point. I am a c7t1 paraplegic I don't need a nurse. Don't get me wrong I date a nurse (if she was real hot) just kidding
Any special care I need comes from home care. It consists of a cup of coffee to wake me up and then house work. Oh Ya I have to wear those damn compression stockings.
I want a mate a friend a lover not a care giver. Any special care I may need in the future will be given by a care giver not my mate. I am a healthy active man. I see the doctor fairly regular just to keep up on things. I know my conditions and know what to look for. In 23 yrs of being in a chair I spent 6 weeks in bed with a pressure sore and that was done by accident not by not taking care of my self.
Do I need some assistance yes but only in certain instances; but I have been on my own for 12 years now and there not to many places that I want to go to, that I don’t get in.
All I can ask is look past the disability and look at my accomplishments, my life in general. You would really be surprised at what I have done and can still do.
On last point if any one has seen the movie Murder ball ( a game invented for people in chairs; I played that sport when it was in its infancy. Trust me it is not for the faint of heart. We gave more than one junior A hockey teem a run for their money when we played against them. | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/23/2005 10:00:41 PM | i definitely would date someone with a medical condition/disability. I have a medical condition myself. It would be kind of hypocritical of me not to.
I have depression/anxiety disorder. I take meds, and I'm mostly normal.... :-p
I am being tested for some other physical problems, that haven't been diagnosed yet.... but it's looking like psoriatric arthritis. Because I have psoriasis, which is a skin condition that covers 80-95% of my body depending on the time of year and my stress level.
To just want to date someone that is perfect is unrealisitc. Most people have something "wrong" with them. I try to be upfront about what's going on with me, and if that guy doesn't want to even get to know me because I have flaky skin or because I'm not perfectly sane is someone I don't think I'd want to know anyway. | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/23/2005 10:36:32 PM | .
Would I date someone with a debilitating medical condition? Most certainly -- all else being equal. I wouldn’t think twice about it. After all, I was officially said to be handicapped for 35 years. So, now that I’m very strong and darn near “normal” again, I would be a damn hypocrite if I didn’t. Besides, due to my background, I could probably also help some to make life much easier for them.
. | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/23/2005 10:55:44 PM | I do not see anything wrong with going with anyone with any disability/medical condition. If you were in a relationship, or even married, and they ended up this way, would you break up with them because of it? Personally, it seems as if anyone who cannot deal with anyone who may be like this, has their own type of disability, due to a fear of it, or just plain ignorance. If they are afraid of what their friends might think, they may as well grow up, and think for themself.   | |
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ray313
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Joined: 10/22/2005
Msg: 38 | |
| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/23/2005 11:00:13 PM | | I actually had a girl break up with me 6 months ago after I had a heart attack(caused by chemo treatment that weakened my heart muscles) + stroke (luckily I was in the hospital when I had the stroke). She said it wasn't the medical part of it that scared her away, it was the idea of losing someone your in a relationship with. I could kind of understand what she meant. I would like to ask if anybody would break up with someone if you had the medical issue? | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/23/2005 11:33:24 PM | Well I have anxiety disorder, and it usually scares people away for some reason. I don't hide it either cause I tell them right off the bat, cause there are somethings I can and can't do, mainly I have no social life. I'm also on disability, so that eliminates me out of the population of shallow people (practically everybody around here). Other than that, I'm pretty normal..I've had relationships before. Not good ones may I add. But I guess when it comes to a woman with me, it depends. As long as she won't try to kill me or something. lol
I'm the type that goes for what person you are inside. | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/24/2005 12:08:15 AM | Of course I would, I dont see "disabilities" as some might...I have learned from animals that disabilites are really not disabilites at all...it seems though they may be lacking something, they actually have BETTER abilites elsewhere. We're all disabled, we're all able, just a matter of how we play the cards we are dealt. I have seen deaf dogs that know sign language, that can "hear" from vibrations on the floor. I knew a three legged one eyed cat (yea he had a few bad days in life and used up a few of his 9 lives young!) that would still square off with other cats, he'd hunch down ( they couldnt tell he was missing a leg) and actually squint that eye closed so the other cat couldnt see it was missing. I had a bunny that was paralyzed from her chest down, I made a wheel chair for her and she got around great, and put up with being diapered and clothed. She taught me the best lessons, she never let any obsticle get in her way, she even would attempt steps. She took help with grace and dignity and never got down. If she lived longer ( I only had her for 7 months) she would have been a therapy bunny, and inspiration to all, but she was an inspiration to me. Never again will any "disability" scare me now that Trooper has touched my life.
As far as women or men that are scared off by disabilities...everyone is entitled to fear of the unknown, doenst make them bad or good, just as I put myself out there as "Hey I'm Chris, I'm a single mom, I'm fat and I'm honest" anyone has to put themselves out there too...good and "bad" stuff...if someone is willing to accept you for who you are, great, if not, they werent meant for you at all! Thank them for not wasting your time and move right on...there's someone for everyone! | |
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| I have a question
Posted: 10/24/2005 12:55:27 AM |
How could he cheat on you? You are beautiful.
And in answer to the question of the thread, well it depends. That is far too general
Aee thanks Mr Simon that's very sweet. And your answer to the OP's question is far...it is a general question. | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/25/2005 2:57:43 AM | Yes I’d date someone with a medical condition, as a care giver I have seen plenty of folks with disabilities. They can do more things then some ‘normal’ people that I have seen. I have seen plenty of people (both male and female) in my job that push the limits within themselves. They have goals they work towards, they work hard. To me that speaks oodles about how they tackle life’s problems.
My youngest son is disabled since birth, adhd, asthma, numerous physical and mental delays BUT I have seen him work hard to overcome most of these difficulties. He does things that my other two children do. Heck he even tutors other children in math (which helps his self esteem) and when he is tutoring or helping others they do not seem to notice that he drools a bit or randomly twitches, they see past his differences. He is 13 and well most teens don’t drool and so forth. My point is that some disabled folks are smarter and can do things easier then other ‘normal’ folks. I certainly could not tutor someone in algebra as easily as my son does.
As far as dating someone with a mental disability I would have to say that is a no go for me. Perhaps if it was a slight on easily controlled by meds then I would chance it, however if it is one of the more serious ones then no way. My ex is bipolar rapid cycler, and even though I knew about the disease (read quite abit), I would never put myself at risk again for the heartbreak or worse. When he’d get feeling ‘normal; he’d quit the meds and well home life went down the tubes in a hurry. I admit I am quite seriously jaded when it comes to folks with mental illnesses, I feel those type of people are only for friendships and not romantic interests. That is just my own opinion. | |
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| Would you date someone with a disability/medical condition?
Posted: 10/25/2005 8:04:16 AM | Wow I have to say this is a really thought provoking thread. For once I don't want to jump in with a quick response but definately need to put a lot of thought to it. I have my own medical disability and daily pain, but nothing compared to some of you and I did date for 2 years someone with a 'chemical imbalance' which at times was difficult although it was not what brought the relationship to the end. In fact, although I was very supportive of his disability when my own disability which is mainly dealing with pain and tiredness, caused me to gain 12 lbs. because of med changes....he bolted.... ....I rambled anyway lol...have to go give this thread more thought before I respond..... | |
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