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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 11:21:53 AM | Ok, here's a question... If you had heard on the grape vine that some person you were attracted to had an affair once in his/her life, would you go on a date with this person and why?
Alison | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 11:45:29 AM | "IN FACT, MANY THAT HAVE AFFAIRS STILL LOVE THEIR SPOUSE IMMENSELY" (OTB)
On this topic I read that affairs actually strengthen relationships.
I suppose, make it or break it.
bzzzzzzzzzzzz | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 11:50:31 AM | My best friend is head over heal in love with man whose marriage broke due to his affair.
They seem to be madly in love.
It is difficult to rationalise motives when heart is involved. Past is past, we all have past.
bzzz | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 11:59:06 AM | | Simple, men are genetically programmed to propagate the species. To fuk where ever whenever that possibility arises. Women should be thankful the we are able to show as much restraint as we do. Its really hard.......LOL | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 12:37:48 PM |
Simple, men are genetically programmed to propagate the species
This is a scientific fact. Not making an excuse here but women "in heat" give off a "scent or vibe" to which males are genetically programed to respond.
After the first time you cheat with a woman, well ..... you can only get hung once for the same crime, right? | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 12:48:15 PM | Because women will put up with it.
"This is a scientific fact. Not making an excuse here but women "in heat" give off a "scent or vibe" to which males are genetically programed to respond."
Give me a break. We're not dogs. (Are people really this uneducated?) | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 1:31:08 PM | | when i asked my ex husband why he had an affair he said it was because she was handing it on a plate and over a period of time (about a week ) and before he knew it he was in too deep. | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 1:44:53 PM | | I wouldn't care a toss if someone i really liked had been unfaithful in the past...most people have their reasons, and all have been ashamed to tell in my experience...one thing is for certain where relationships are concerned, you will be alone for the rest of your life if your waiting for perfection | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 1:55:29 PM | personally as a society we have become so unshockable about everything that cheaters are not shunned anymore rather some are even given the pat on the back by friends and sometimes family.personally the sanctity of marriage and fidelity between 2 people has been lost.ive even heard the excuse of we are all animals and not built for forever."BULLUCKS"
we may be animals but we also have free will and know exactly what we do.
Honestly I have more respect for the man or woman that is honest enough to say no long term.Im tired personally of hearing i want 1 person forever to only hear a short time later that they are bedhopping on a steady basis.long term is actually as long as they can get their jollies in bed. | |
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eyez
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Joined: 11/27/2004
Msg: 37 | |
| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 1:56:39 PM | Men and Women having affairs: The Reasons
They can
Some will.
Some will regret it
Some won't regret it
To pinpoint a reason and list would be like trying to list the names of those who do. Almost endless or, at the least, a daunting task.
The real question is, does the one being cheated on forgive, tolerat it or just move on.
Me, personally, I would just move on. Wayyyy too many quality people to connect with in this world. | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 4:25:26 PM | | In my opinion..most women take care of themselves when they are single because they are on the market so they have to look good. When they are comfortable in a relationship or marriage they let themselves go ( same goes for the men). They just stop trying.. or they just think..."I have him now so why try?" That;s when the other person starts looking at other people and before you know it... it's time to move on. | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 4:32:54 PM | | Because they are jerks and if their partners let them get away with it, then they will do it..How many times have you heard , it was just because I was drunk, or it didnt mean anything, I love you...give me a break, ladies, not all of us are like this so if it happens to you, rememberthat there are sweet guys out there that would treat you like the ladies you are.....Rob | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 4:47:03 PM | Congrats tantalizing you know how to keep your man happy.... wait a sec.. why are you on a singles site if you already have a man ....?? are you cheating? lol  | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 4:54:01 PM | | i know..i dont have a man because....geez i honestly dont know..would like one,very much.and the 10 yrs single? then i didnt want one.just wanted to be mom and work.now im ready? any takers? | |
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ksue44
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Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 42 | |
| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 5:53:06 PM | Men have affairs for several reasons:
They no longer feel appreciated
They no longer feel needed
They want to recapture their youth - hence the sexual conquest with a young lady
They hunger for a different sexual experience | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 6:24:47 PM | First off, I'd like to tell "40 Something" who do you think you are calling someone from Tennesee trailer trash? Simply because you hold a degree? Get off your high horse and face reality by finally getting your nose out of your book!
I agree with most who say there are a zillion and one reasons as to why men cheat - but there is a thin line in the question you ask Alison, as to was his cheating a full fledged affair or a one night stand? To me there is a difference, albeit, the bottom line is still just as damaging.
I have been on the side where I have been cheated on. I believe I am an honest, good looking, strong and confident woman who works hard and loves to make my man happy (don't have one right now though!) So why did he cheat? Insecurity? Conquest? Availability? Miserable? Could be all of the above - including miserable. What I have learned is sometimes each of us has to take a step back from a shitty situation and still learn something from it - even such a thing as cheating. Regardless what side of the fence you're on ... something is to be learned for yourself - NOT about the other person.
Ms Ali - you're looking for an answer as whether or not you should continue with the man you are interested in ... the only one who can make that decision is YOU. You can do one of 2 things: think he's an ass for his past and walk away ... or follow your heart and take the risk. Just be aware of what the consequences are ... on both sides of the fence. The decision is yours, and yours alone ... sorry for rambling!! | |
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Mr O
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Joined: 9/8/2005
Msg: 44 | |
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vp2
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Joined: 8/29/2005
Msg: 45 | |
| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 8:19:11 PM | Ms Ali,
I only read the first 2 posts of this thread. I have to agree with the one who said the same reason women do. It isn't that men cheat more than women, nor is it that women cheat more than men. People cheat, period. It sucks, but it's the truth. Why do they cheat? Missing something from their relationship. They have self esteem/ self respect issues. There are a variety of different reasons why they do so. Each person that cheats has their own reasons/excuses why they do what they do. The only thing I can say to you is this: Don't think that just because someone is a man, that they will cheat or are more likely to cheat than you are. I don't know you, so I don't know how likely you are to cheat. Judging from the thread title, I'm going to guess you never have and never will. If so, that is great. I know women who are completely innocent, but are still more likely to cheat than I, since I never have nor will. I wish you the best of luck in finding someone who understands the meaning of the word "faithfull".
Edit:
Simple, men are genetically programmed to propagate the species
This is a scientific fact. Not making an excuse here but women "in heat" give off a "scent or vibe" to which males are genetically programed to respond.
After the first time you cheat with a woman, well ..... you can only get hung once for the same crime, right?
and some men wonder why women think that all us men are cheaters and liars. I for one, and not "genetically programed" to cheat. I'm sorry if you are buddy. I feel sorry for the next girl you get with. | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 8:33:35 PM | | Because the only thing better than p**** is new p****. Actually, a girl told me this in the male form. We are hunter/gatherers and new prey can be exciting. By asking such a question, it assumes women don't. I was faithful for 15 years to my ex-wife, she wasn't-hence we're divorced. Two way street. | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 11:24:24 PM | I can't tell you about the psychology of why anyone would cheat but I can tell you why I think the man i was with for 27 years cheated on me...
HE was not happy and since he is/was a coward he chose this way to deal with his unhappiness. The crazy part was he wanted to have his cake and eat it too. IF i would of allowed it I would be sharing him with another woman as that is what he wanted...what a rotten monster!
I thank my lucky stars that there are people out there with cheater mentality who settle other cheaters ...they get what they deserve and as for me...I am here. Plenty of fish!!! | |
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| Why do men have affairs?
Posted: 9/11/2005 11:27:55 PM | Why people have affairs. Well I do think there are lots of reasons.
One is just plain old attraction. If someone married his best friend, he may never have truly felt a huge physical BURN for someone. Faced with that for the first time, it's just tough to walk away. And some men just ain't that strong.
I think a BIG reason is that, plain and simple, there is a problem in the relationship. Now problem solving is not fun. It is WORK. But getting to know a pretty lady, and feeling all the bells, whistles, and butterflies again....that's not WORK, it's FUN.
So, basically, it's a way to avoid hard work.
That's the simple version. But take it a step further....when a married man leaves his wife for the "other" woman....it doesn't always work out. That's because the woman was not his "true love" but just a life jacket to help him get out of an unhappy marriage. Again- leaving a marriage is hard, and work. Falling in love and starting something new is fun. So they do it that way.
Again, not all, but I've seen it a lot, unfortunately. | |
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