| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 7/9/2008 6:00:18 PM | You know what the really sad part about all of this is????
Did any one of you stop to think what the children "go through" when they get constantly put in between and USED as your pawns????
amazing how self centered individuals can be.......
remember.....
they grow up to be a product of us........
amazing........... | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 7/9/2008 6:23:24 PM | Your comment is noted and is one that holds value, dignity and couth. I would move to say that this thread is not all about over looking the children though, .... if you've been divorced or have full custody you will experience the financial sufferings of doing it "on your own".
I will not make this reply all about me but only as an illustration. ..... I am a full time father both sole, legal and physical. I lost my career stepping up in their best interest and to protect them.
I have to work and day care soaks the living snot out of me. Now what makes this worse is that I do NOT receive any support from the mom and this creates a emotion and one of that many seem to share on here.
Being a full time parent is demanding and we don’t get to go out on weekdays to catch the games at the pub or take advantage of a Saturday night as easily as most. We work .. we do the soccer mom/dad things and I think it's recockulus to think that we should excuse ourselves from throwing a shit fit on a thread while venting.
Our children are our priorities hence the fact that we have stepped up, love and care for them.
If anything the fact alone that this was over looked is absent minded. Put that in your pipe and smoke it. GOOD NIGHT DETROIT
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 7/12/2008 6:32:58 PM | | Best of luck to you my friend. I've been a singel dad for almost 11 years now and I've never seen a dime. All in all for us, it's been for the best. But your situation may differ. The "egg donor" for my girls hasn't bothered to come see them or have any interation other than random phone calls (usually out of her mind drunk at 1 am). Each mom is different as is each judge. No matter the outcome, I wish you the best as a fellow single dad. | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 11/24/2008 3:46:43 PM | Great! To Wildchyre, at last a thinking woman who doesn't just agree with the woman's point of view, simply because it's the sisterhood thing to do. Thanks for bringing out that it should all be about the kids.
As for you with the missing check, stop crying about missing your needs and, Dad, for Christ's sake, send her her check. It's not your money. You're messing with the kids' needs. How endearing is that for a father to deprive his kids?
I know why he's not sending the money. Revenge. Make her sweat. ***holes, both of them. Lady, just go through the courts and take yourself out of the picture. They'll force him to be a man and live up to his responsibilities. As for your part, don't antagonize him by rubbing his nose in your new boyfriend's crack. That's really crass of you, and that's what you get for messing with his ego.
Both of you are idiots. You should have stayed married so that your idocy could be concentrated under one roof and not contaminate other households. My ire is up. Thanks again to Wildchyre for her self-control and detachment. | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 11/24/2008 7:36:56 PM | Talk about resurrecting a topic...
< divorce was final about 3 years now... I was awarded custody and support for my two $272/month total. She paid 2 months voluntarily and nothing since. She went to work under the table, so the only time I really see anything is when her taxes come around - she files those claiming no income, and I get her refund (credits, actually - she pays no taxes)
She recently took me to court to try to reduce the amount of money that she isn't paying me in support, even.
I've hired an attorney to go after her - the Washington Division of Child Support isn't really doing much to collect on the back support, and she's moved out of state - she gets child support for another kid, which is hers from another guy, but for some reason, that money isn't touched. I'm going after something called 'presumed income'. This is a legal definition enacted in my state to keep a deadbeat parent from hiding their income and trying to avoid paying support. It basically states that because of your age, education and stated income, the court calculates the child support based on what some one with a similar background normally earns. This takes all the advantages away from working under the table.
I won't actually collect anything from her, but I can get a decision against her, ruining her credit, and the courts will enter a contempt of court order against her for refusing to abide by the child support agreement.
Based on my experience, and the anecdotal experiences of others that I know of, they are more likely to go to extreme measures to collect from a deadbeat dad, than from a deadbeat mom. There isn't supposed to be any gender bias, but there certainly appears to be some anyhow (after all, they don't want to send a woman to jail, do they?)
All in all, I am not too worried about the money - I'll earn more. I'm after her in court because she is trying to cheat the system and avoid her responsibility. I can survive just fine without her help. | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 11/26/2008 9:53:36 AM | | I say all men need to stand up together and show the right way to do this. Primary custody and CS is BS for all involved. No man should ever pay CS nor should the woman. The only way to correct this is with politics. If you have friends there please get them involved. CS is a thing of the past and does not work. The dead beats that it's for do not pay it anyway. The one's that pay the other party does not need it. Don't take a dime - it would just be held over your head on a later date anyway. Spoken from a primary custody father of two that does not want a dime. I have done it on my own and will continue to do so. It's not that hard when love is involved. | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 11/26/2008 10:01:23 AM | | catfan- A child deserves the stbility of 2 incomes. And if the parents are not splitting custody then CS should be paid. And anyways- like I told my daughters bio dad- If you hadn't of ran away to your mommy like the puss you are then we would probably still be together and I would be getting ALL of your money. Now you pay a minimum amout to your daughter. | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 11/26/2008 10:11:40 AM | Fab-mom:
I agree! So what if they were raised on one income though? There are still many out there that are. I would be included. I'm also a little offended - I left and moved in with my parent about two months ago because of physical abuse from my X. This is the kind of comment that would come out of her mouth. That is what scares me! | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 11/26/2008 11:30:44 AM | Well, i was also raised on one income but had both parents. I had my mother at home and my dad working. But to me if the custodial parent has to work twice as hard or longer to make ends meet (which a lot have to do) when the other parent does not contribute then the child is not only losing things that are available when you do have extra money they are also losing out on the most important thing- time with the parent.
I'm lucky in that I do not NEED the CS . But I'll be d*mned if he walks away with no worries. I doubt he will ever pay continuously. I do NOT doubt that he will always be recieving certified letters from the court house "ruining his life" as he put it. It is enough for me to know that although he will neer care about hi daughter in any way that he will NEVER be able to forget her either. | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 11/29/2008 7:42:29 AM | Get yourself a female attorney.
* A lot of men are sympatric towards women.
· A lot of men have macho issues and feel that they have to protect women (including your ex) from everything (including you) to prove that they are a man.
· A lot of guys still think that a woman should stay at home with the kids and the husband should be nothing more than a paycheck that supports them.
* Some guys remember their poor deprived mother who struggled to take care of him while their drunken no good father was never around therefore stereo typing every guy as no good.
This is very true with male Judges and male Attorneys.
I had a male attorney for over a year, who did nothing except take my money.
From day one, my son wanted to live with me.
The attorney that the judge appointed my son was in favor of my son living with me.
The Judge was in favor of my son living with me.
With all this in my favor, my male attorney still did nothing except go to court every month and charge me for it.
Then I fired my male attorney and got a female attorney.
Within two weeks things changed.
Within four weeks, my ex was agreeing to everything.
Within six weeks, everything was finalized in my son and my favor.
By the end of the second month, my son was living with me.
Female attorneys worked hard to get where they are at. They fought hard for equal rights.
Female attorneys don’t like whiney women who use their gender to get what they want.
Female attorneys don’t like women who portray, “Feel sorry for me, I’m a female” image.
Female attorneys don’t like women who sets the Equal Rights Movement back 50 years for their own greed.
Male attorneys tend to feel sorry for females and don’t put forth the effort to fight for a man’s rights.
Due to the sexism that I have found with male attorneys, I highly recommend that guys get a female attorney to represent them in court on family matters. | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 1/13/2009 3:05:43 PM | The secret to getting your ex to pay child support is to make sure that the Judge is fair and equitable. That means having a lawyer who knows the Judges, and not just the law so that they can steer your case to the right one. As several people have said, never, EVER say a word to your children about child support for any reason. Children have a right to love both parents without bounds, and parents have a responsibility to ensure that they never do anything to interfere with that right.
There are plenty of dead-beat moms out there, just like dads. Just love your kids the way that you would have wanted your parents to love you. They are more important than a paycheck, although all parents have a responsibility to support their children.
Good luck,
Mark | |
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| Any guys successful in getting ex-Mom to pay child support?
Posted: 1/14/2009 9:13:50 PM |
Anyone had success getting ex-mom to pay child support?
The short answer? No
Really, though, I'd rather her do more than the occasional phone call with our son than pay the back debt (I stopped counting at 10K). It's sad, but I'm pretty sure Santa Claus is more real to my son than his mother is, and as much as I've tried to get her to do more in his life, after 7 years I pretty much give up. I can't not receive child support and be responsible to pay for the 10 hours it takes to drive to where she lives so she can see him.
I just can't do it.
So I feel for you and all the guys out there who are in this situation, but the best thing any of us can do is be the most supportive parent to our child(ren) we can. | |
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