| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/10/2008 9:30:46 AM | DUDE YOU SAY THAT EVERYTIME, SO WHY DO YOU POST ABOUT IT?????? Single moms would not wannna date you either. and to herpes, i mean hermes, backseat? you sound selfish, so you think first of all that a woman with children would date and old guy like yourself, who has never been married or had any children? Think about it, because I know the answer.....ITS NO!!!! Just as some are turned off by single parents im turned of by those who are in their late 30's and older who have never been married let alone never had a child, so, we don't want either of the two of you either.
Im a single parent with 1 who will ONLY date another single parent, I sure as hell dont want noone who no one else desired to marry or even have a child with. IM DONE. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/10/2008 2:01:25 PM | JOHNE SHUT UP, I NEVER ASKED FOR YOUR OPINION AND NOR DID ANYONE ELSE!!!
Single parents (yeah, I'm including myself) are in disadvantage in the dating world. It's true, and no amount of shouts and mockery will change that.
I agree.
a) Improve yourself and become attractive to a potential mate.
b) Complain endlessly and bash your target in the hope of shaming them to date you.
And which of these applies to you?!
For those who choose a), congratulations. For those who choose b), good luck with your cats.
a) Thankyou very much and b) I have two cats!
In the end, I think that for somebody who really wants to find someone, my advice and opinions are more useful than the sugarcoated illusion that most "you're great, men are idiots if they don't date you" advocates favor.
Well someone has to value your opinions............
Sorry, but who said this? Because to summarize my post, I think I said that she should take no notice of the negative opinions given on here, as they would probably make her feel worse!
Oh, and you'd better show some originality in your taunts. I really expected more from you.
Oh look, another man that presumes to know me. Pleeeeease.
I'm starting to think there are some 'multiple personalities' on here. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/11/2008 1:14:21 AM |
And which of these applies to you?!
They would apply to me if I were complaining. But that's not the case.
Sorry, but who said this?
There are 12 pages here and more than 100 in the other thread, and many more in all the related threads where most women say exactly that.
Because to summarize my post, I think I said that she should take no notice of the negative opinions given on here, as they would probably make her feel worse!
No. You said "DONT LISTEN TO A WORD THE MEN THAT POST ON HERE SAY!!!!!". No mention about negative or positive opinions. However, I agree: Some opinions may make her feel worse. The question would be then: What is better, to feel all good and dandy without a grip on reality, or to face reality, never mind how bleak or hard it is, and work hard for success?
Oh look, another man that presumes to know me. Pleeeeease.
You presume I'm presuming to know you.
I'm starting to think there are some 'multiple personalities' on here.
You're starting to think. That's something. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/11/2008 5:32:55 AM | i would just like to say that half u people in this forum have no idea what ur going on about!!!!
for starters don't judge single mum's u have no idea why they are single mum's or what they have been through there are many reasons! he could have died, been abusive, cheated, or maybe it is against their religion to have an abortion or maybe she just choose to have the child because she wanted it??? who knows but u have no right accusing single mums of having no goals or no ambition in life cause its not true!!!
I am 23 and a single mum i work part time and i earn heaps more then my ex partner did when he was full time i am also studying to become a police officer so how can u say that i don't have a goal to achieve????? I am independant and support myself and don't need a man to support me!!! N u know what it would b great to find a guy who will love me and love my daughter but who knows what is going to happen?
and as for the single minded guys that r saying single mum's r bludgers or whatever won't get a single chick anyway cause they r just arses that have no respect for woman in general!!!
so i say all the power to the single mums i know how u feel and know what ur going through just keep in there and don't worry about the single minded guys there r good ones too!!!
good luck | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/11/2008 6:44:46 AM | Hi.
i'm new to this site and would just like to say my bit if i may....i am a single mum, not by choice but things just didn't work out with my ex as sometimes happens. it's good to see some men out there who don't see us 'mums' as only that! We are a great catch!!
my worry is finding a decent man who isn't some kind of nutter who would jeopardise my daughter in any way!! i have been single since my divorce five years ago due to this fear.
when/if i do meet a nice bloke, he will have to be patient with regards to letting them in my daughters life. if he sticks around then he will be worth it.
thanks for letting me say my piece.  | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/11/2008 2:14:50 PM | Rockie (can I call you rockie?),
It is clear you are running out of things to say as you are resorting to cheap insults. Never mind, eh? I would take my own advice if I were you. Start to think. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/11/2008 2:27:59 PM | Which advice? "Don't listen to men"? Besides, you didn't answer my question.
And yes, you can call me Rocky. May I call you Bullwinkle? | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/11/2008 4:16:24 PM | | What about women dating single dads. Let us define first what a single Mom or Dad is. Yes I beleive my ex wife is a single mom in the sense that she is not married to me or any other man at this piont in her life,but on the other side of the coin . I don,t believe she is a single mom, in the sense that she has not had to do it alone. Raising my two children that is. I have always been very involved in their lives,to the point of booking off work so as to accomadate her needs. Now to the question,men dating single mothers and vice versa. First of all Icannot be her childrens Dad and my children already have a Mom. Believe it can work,but take it slow,friends first. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/12/2008 8:40:03 PM | my message to all u single men that single mothers are nothing but welfare receipients
or just out there to get a quick buck or two from the next quy that comes along is pretty lame . I have been a single mom of 3 wonderful kids and done it all on my own
by working very hard. Also putting up with the father of them , which cause we aren't together he will make it difficult no matter what . If they give u money they think the money is for the mom but it isn't it is 4 the children if not for rent or for their food not for ( well not me anyway) moms habits. I work hard for my money . I am very prowd of what I have done all on my own . | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/13/2008 3:45:28 AM | Rockie,
No you may not. How derrogatory!
The question would be then: What is better, to feel all good and dandy without a grip on reality, or to face reality, never mind how bleak or hard it is, and work hard for success?
Ever heard of the saying dont kick a dog when its down? Empathy? Sympathy? We have all been there and now how hard it is! The last thing that lady needs is to read the biggoted opinions of some of the posters (men and women, I stand corrected) on here! So why read them? Good point. What actually is the point to all this opinion expressing? I have said it before and I will say it again......WHO CARES!!! | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/13/2008 4:00:29 AM | No you may not. How derrogatory!
Oh, well. I suppose it kills the idea of having a TV show together.
Ever heard of the saying dont kick a dog when its down? Empathy? Sympathy? We have all been there and now how hard it is!
Yes, I've heard about it. The thing is, when the dog is trying to stand up, do you tell it "stay down, somebody will come and lift you"? The whole idea of trying to get back to the dating world has more to do with facing reality than with staying in dreamland. Giving hope is good, to hide reality is bad.
What actually is the point to all this opinion expressing? I have said it before and I will say it again......WHO CARES!!!
It applies both to my opinion and yours. So why are you still expressing opinions here and in other threads? | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 2:23:54 PM | | Again, WHO CARES???? I just like to tap out a sequence of letters that just happen to make som sort of sense. I never said anyone should not express them, I just wondered what the point is if nothing ever gets resolved?! | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 3:29:36 PM | | I agree with you 100%. I am a single mother of three and find guys are very close-minded when they learn that I am a single mom. I am not any different than a woman without children. I go to college full-time, my daughter is in daycare. I get out at least once a week for me time. I have lots of time to spend with that special person. I want to get married later and have more kids with the right man. Whats so different about that? Just because I have children doesn't nessacerily mean I have all kinds of baggage. Children are beautiful,wonderful, gifts from god and shouldn't be looked upon as baggage. They are innocent and didn't ask to be brought into this world. Any man who doesn't want children is oviously not my type of course, but for those men that do want kids and are close-minded oviously feel that they want to have thier own children with a woman who has no other interferences in her life. That to me is selfish. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 3:58:25 PM | | why is it selfish to want to raise your pown child only and not someone else's child. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 4:07:02 PM | Wow, Johne... you can't actually work that one through yourself?
It's selfish on the face of it. I'm not saying it's WRONG, per se, but it clearly indicates a strong desire to fulfill only your OWN needs and desires. Hence, it's selfish. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 4:59:34 PM | ^^^No offence but, I don't really see that as being selfish per se, myself. After all, when you get right down to it, everyone has their own 'wants' in any relationship, and I think it's much more admirable to at least state those wants or preferences up front, rather than leading someone on, don't you?
I think a lot of times, it might just boil down plain and simple to financial logistics, especially if someone still wants to have their own children one day. I'm married to a single father who has one daughter, and we hope to have a couple children of our own one day as well. But, suppose my husband had had two, three, four children already when I met him? Then in addition to any kids we would have together, all of a sudden *wow*, that's a lot of children! And, let's face it, in this day and age, with the cost of living, let alone tuition and things like that quickly rising, not many people can afford to have a whole houseful of children anymore and I possibly would have stepped back from the situation myself in that case as well. Which isn't selfish I don't think, it's just being realistic. Which is, again, a good thing I think....we all want to be able to provide for our children, or any step-children, in the best possible way that we can...if it just isn't feasible monetarily, then I don't consider it selfish at all to step back and consider the reality of getting into such a situation.  | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 5:17:57 PM | I would say Johne is being no more than prudent. especially in this day and age. and from what i've read about his experiences with single moms, he came by that prudence honestly.
in my opinion, men are scared of single mom's because the children could symbolize a failed relationship with real consequences. This year Stats Can announced that single people are outnumbering married people. long-term relationships are becoming an anomaly as society continues to move towards convenience and wants rather than the critical need to believe in and maintain the family unit. my grandparents had to stay together and raise (making them work) their 7 kids or they likely wouldn't make it through a winter alive. those times are long gone. society won't tolerate conditions such as those. If a lass wished to here in canada, she could breed with let's say one new guy for 4 years, living with each one for each year. if she wished, she could nail lucky bachelor #4 with the maintenance bill for 4 kids, bachelor 3 for 3, ad nauseum.
like i said. prudent | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 5:23:37 PM | [Children do not need to see a parade of men wander through their lives. It only teaches them that men are transient and not to be depended upon.]
Re: Mr. Sullen's post:
...surely it is clear by now that men ARE transient and should NOT be depended upon. that is generally why we ended up as single parents! geez.
the movie VOLVER with Penelope Cruz captures this theme so well...i highly recommend it for any trying to vision a more consistent view of life, a vision that is based upon the solidarity of women.
signed,
ms. single parent ( who just happens to be over-educated, make a lot of cash, works a great job with lots of benefits, and still has a lot of realistic dreams.) | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 5:25:19 PM | I just see wanting to raise your own children as something special. As the poster above me stated thre are many legal problems with raising another man's child.
Single moms need to remember they are competing with women who do not have children as well. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 5:27:49 PM |
Single moms need to remember they are competing with women who do not have children as well.
How can we forget for more than half a second, with you there to kindly remind us (shove it down our throats) every time you breathe?
Btw, why is it a friggin competition now?
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 6:42:05 PM | | *walking away, holding her head asking herself WHY, WHY do you even bother, quirky* | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 7:04:17 PM |
Because we men have choices. Some will date single moms some won't.
Oh for chrissakes, Johne...we ALL have choices...some men won't date a brunette but will date a blonde, some women won't date a balding man but prefer a man with hair...GET OVER IT! I'm not even a single mom, and while you originally raised some valid points about locum parentis etc, now you are just on a vendetta.
Yes, you could find your "perfect woman", and have your "perfect" 2.5 children with the white picket fence....but you are very young. Funny I should say that, considering we are both the same chronological age, eh? But yes, you might meet your "perfect woman" who also agrees "we need to get back to old family values" etc....I hate to giggle, but every time I've seen you post that, I've wanted to jump in singing and say "lucky there's a Family Guy", eh? lol
But, there but by the grace of God go you, or whatever the saying is. Yes, you might meet your "perfect" wife, and have your kids together...and then your "perfect" wife might decide that YOU aren't so 'perfect' for her anymore....or she might get schmucked by a bus the next day, (heaven forfend) but it might happen...and then YOU will be a single parent as well. YES, the locum parentis laws are scary....but there's an easy solution to that for you, just don't date single parents.
Okay, my rant is over, lol. Lots of valid viewpoints coming from many posters, just had to comment on this one, was all.  | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 7:28:24 PM | Single mom's need to understand that not everyone wnts to date a single mom.
Why would a single mom not be more open to dating a single dad? I know mamy are but I know a few in my circle of friends will not. | |
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| Men dating single mothers
Posted: 6/16/2008 7:37:43 PM | I don't know why I'm even bothering, but hey...some women don't want to date a man who's 5'6" if they're taller than that...is it sinking in yet? Preferences work both ways. And yes, I'll take my 3 days. (blushes)
And, Johne...what WOULD you do if you met your "perfect creature" and then she got schmucked by a bus the day after bearing your children? You'd be a single parent then too, after all....;) | |
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