| Mean Girls Posted: 8/10/2009 8:19:46 AM | This is high school bs. Sorry you're having to deal with it at work. Since it's not really the best time to look for another job, the best thing you can do is act like you don't give a ____. Make sure you do not hang your head - ever - or look like you're apprehensive of them. Give them lots of obviously fake smiles, to make it clear that being in their company is not desirable. Act like everything is better than fine all the time, do your work to the very best of your ability, and believe it or not, their b!tchiness will be their own punishment eventually. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 8/10/2009 8:22:21 AM | | When I was 9 a girl at school threatened to beat me up. I started crying and then invited me for a sleepover. You can always try that. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 8/10/2009 9:13:30 AM | Okay, Kiddo; I checked out your profile, and the one thing that struck me was..."everything happens for a reason..." This is something I believe, as well.
So, with that in mind--what are you going to do? What is the lesson in being 'bullied'? What are you learning from being the 'victim'? What is the payoff for remaining in that role? Do you honestly want to be friends with these women? Why?
You work for the government, which means there is a Human Resources Department. It is their job to investigate 'bullies' in the workplace, but from what you said, this isn't really bullying--it's more like 'ignoring'. They ignore you or give you a token invitation for drinks, which makes you feel bad, but that isn't bullying you.
If you're serious about wanting to be on the 'in' with them, then begin with one of the women. Chat her up--build a bridge with her. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 8/10/2009 1:26:49 PM | I really don't know what to tell you from so little info. People don't tend to bully me because I don't put up with it but also I don't whine back or act like I'm hurt, I just really want to know what their point is then we either work it out or they take their BS elsewhere. I've had my moments, of course, but really, most bullies are just ignorant blowhards, don't go to their level but also don't be a target in the first place. I'm not saying bullies ever have the right to harass anyone but make sure you aren't giving them ammo. Bullies are either insecure pussies or they are mentally unstable, the former can be put in their place and will run with their tails between their legs; the latter can be dangerous sometimes, so be sure you know who you are dealing with.
The most important thing to know is that a bully is someone below you, so if you are happy with yourself, don't ever let a bully make you feel badly. Being a bully is one of the most useless pursuits in life, it takes a pretty worthless person to be a bully, and to be a pack of bullies, that screams insecurity and jealousy and being a pretty vile group human beings. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 8/10/2009 5:54:21 PM | | I conur.......................................! | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 8/10/2009 7:46:50 PM | get a nanny cam and get everything on dvd for the boss and lawyer  | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 8/10/2009 10:21:04 PM | I think Sugarland sings this song....mean girls.
What are the little girls doin that constitutes "mean"? Need more information
Aren't their anti bullying laws where you are? If so, follow your companys procedures to report them.
Whatever you do...don't show fear....then they know they got you. Stand up to them and don't let them bully you. You don't need to use physical violence to stop mean people. Just don't play into their bullcrap. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 8/11/2009 9:27:01 PM | | Surprise them one day. Stand up to them in a way that won't get you fired. I don't like confrontation but at the same time some people need to be confronted. Don't even wait until another problem or incident comes up, simply confront them individually if possible. And in the mean time see if you can find another job. I used to put up with being bullied when I was younger. HA. Never again. You don't deserve it. No one does | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 8/25/2009 6:28:13 PM | | You could find a work environment you enjoy more...or gain/keep your integrity, work hard, gain some credentials...then become their supervisor. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 8/25/2009 7:07:05 PM | | You guys realise this thread is four years old almost to the month, right? | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 9/12/2009 7:21:30 AM | you make them respect you. what ever it takes.
In a man world , perhaps it's different.
I've had to lay traps ~ before ~ perhaps they stronger and bigger ~
find their weak spot ~
Dance | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/21/2009 8:41:05 PM | One thing to always remember about mean people, especially girls, is that 9 times out of 10 they're jealous...Being a bully is one of the most useless pursuits in life.... and to be a pack of bullies, that screams insecurity and jealousy and being a pretty vile group human beings. Agree. What is amazing to me is that adults behave in this way, especially ganging up together on someone else. Also seems it is mostly women who do this kind of thing. Jealousy, self esteem issues, feeling powerless...I suppose these are all reasons for bullying behavior, but there are no excuses. OP has gotten some good advice on dealing with bullies. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/21/2009 9:54:11 PM | | What did I do? I quite and got my old job back. I used to work at Sears with a bunch of under-achievers who liked nothing better than undercutting each other over $5 per/sale commissions. I laughed at them and left. Took back my job for Ford where the maturity level was a lot higher and $500 commissions were split without any malice. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/22/2009 1:28:54 AM | | well, you said you work with them. So I am assuming they are not your superior in any way. Off of that assumption, I would say "send it right back". It would probably help if I knew more. Because I don't you should null my advice. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/22/2009 10:29:03 AM |
I think Sugarland sings this song....mean girls.
"Mean Girls"
(Ready, OK)
Mean girls Well, I ain't a mean girl But I've known a few They'll make you cry, baby And then blame it on you They'll hate you if you're pretty They'll hate you if you're not They'll hate you for what you lack, baby Then they'll hate you for what you've got
Mean girls, scratchin' and spitting Mean girls, can't be forgiven Mean girls, make mean women Mean girls
It starts on the playground pulling your hair Then in high school it gets worse from there You'll see em coming, they travel in packs Smile to your face, baby, while stabbing your back If they ain't out a-prowling, creeping down the hall You'll find em by the lockers, baby Sharpening their claws
Mean girls, start em young Mean girls, forked tongue Mean girls, see em and run Mean girls
Mean girls
Sugar and spice and everything nice Thinks she hot but she's cold as ice First comes love then comes marriage Then comes her Mama with another little wannabe
Mean girls, full of hate Mean girls, just can't wait Mean girls, to take your date
Mean girls, make stuff up Mean girls, just bad luck Mean girls, stink
Mean girls, best friends forever Mean girls, almost never Mean girls, whatever
Mean girls
Hey, mean girls"Mean Girls" | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/22/2009 12:03:38 PM | missmuah I have been a manager for quite a few years and what I am seeing is EMOTIONAL ABUSE in the workplace. It is possibly a Phenomena known as Workplace Mobbing . Europe has reconized this but the US way behind on this issue . Just Google workplace mobbing it is very hurtful to be mobbed and it happens all the time . Good luck Dave | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/22/2009 12:18:31 PM |
Europe has reconized this but the US way behind on this issue . Absolutely correct. Working in Europe, I know that mobbing, in schools and in the workplace, is something recognized and dealt with. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/22/2009 3:25:11 PM | what are you doing to cause this behavior with yourself and with others...more likely people go after those who think they're better than they...i would look at yourself and see what you are doing to cause all this...your an outsider due to the fact you don't make yourself fit-in with others...be more social and kind...see where it takes you...you don't seem to be on the happy of life...oh well'...i don't let no one bully me..cuz...i am the mean one who'll take you under...yee-haa  | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/22/2009 3:36:08 PM | You want to see a mean girl?
Watch this video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k52QWFeP7OY&feature=related
I'm not sure if the link was posted here before.
Ok guys, anyone ready to date this Elizabeth thing? You have to be as careful as a date with Lorena Bobbit. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/22/2009 4:12:47 PM |
Europe has reconized this but the US way behind on this issue . Absolutely correct. Working in Europe, I know that mobbing, in schools and in the workplace, is something recognized and dealt with. Probably because the US generally has a poor record with embracing individuality. In many places, such as schools and colleges, the pressure to conform and 'join in' is great. 'Outsiders' are often ostracised and excluded. | |
|
| Mean Girls Posted: 11/22/2009 11:27:18 PM | rule number one when bullied - punch the bully square in the nose | |
|