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Roaul
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Joined: 4/14/2004
Msg: 26 | |
| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/2/2005 4:40:11 PM | blastkist no disrepect but i am at home as a carer my mother has had 7 heart-attacks in 3 years my father died of one in 99.also my mother suffers from diabetes,high blood presure,depression and has lost the use of one of her arms.
as a live at home carer does that now make me a moocher,lowlife,ect? | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/2/2005 8:36:41 PM | | I can't stand a momma's boy. Don't get me wrong. . I hope that they would love their mom, but there comes a time when a REAL man should leave momma and make way for himself. They say these things stem from what they learned as a child. So, maybe they will always be that way. I just don't want one of them! | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/3/2005 8:15:55 AM | Id say dont judge a book by its cover ! Some guys live with their mothers because they genuinely care about maintaining the family structure . some guys I know that live with their moms do so because their moms are divorced , lonely , and have no one in their life . I find the most horrible thing someone can do to their parents is throw them in an old folks home and forget about them or just leave them alone to die on their own!
In many cultures , the young are raised and the young take care of their elder parents . They did it out of love for them not a sense of obligation . 20 percent of homeless people are elderly parents of children that just threw them on the street and left them for dead just because they inconvienced their lives ! what kind of sadistic crap is that?
I have seen all of this and seen the suffering that my parents would go through being warehoused in a old folks home . Women can insult me all they want , they can call me "mamas boy" or whatever insult they wish . Let them come talk to me about it and ill set the record straight with them. If being a mamas boy means having a heart , having a conscience , and doing the right thing . Id rather be a mamas boy anyday ! | |
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Roaul
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Joined: 4/14/2004
Msg: 29 | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/3/2005 9:24:15 AM | I think most people can see that there are certain exceptions to why a person would choose to live at home. Whether that be ill parents, personal issues - such as loss of job or divorce etc....are all valid reasons to live at home.
I believe the problem that women will have is meeting a man who has a good job and can afford to live on their own and has two able parents who are not in need of any assistance from their son that still live at home. And when you ask them why they haven't found their own place yet, they simply enjoy the perks of having their meals cooked and laundry done.
Granted, there are perfectly good and valid reasons to be still living at home, on the flip side, there some men who have no excuse at all for still living at home except for not wanting the responsibility of being on their own.
Ultimately it is a case by case scenario and can't be generalized. | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/3/2005 3:18:41 PM | The stereotyping in this thread is hilarious.
I am going to offer you just 1 example here.
This is a true story, and i know this man very well, he is a great friend, and i admire him very much.
He is a specialist, earns over $800,000 per year, and lives at home at the age of 39.
He was married, his wife was killed.
Being very upset, and unable to go home to the house they shared, he moved home to his parents and sold his house.
He planned to just stay a bit.
Well 4 years later he stil lives with his parents....they like him being there....they travel lots and the house has a caretaker.
They are getting up in age to, and its comforting to have him around....they eat dinner together as often as they can, and he makes sure stuff is done that needs doing.
He often does the grocery shopping, gets the furnace guy in yearly to service it etc etc.
His parents and him have built a bond they never had before....he left for university at 19, so really never got to know each other as adults.
So according to many on here this fellow would be considerd a loser....to me his is a man i look up to and admire !
If the world had more people like him , it would be a better place.
Cheers  | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/4/2005 7:06:04 AM | I'm 47 and still live with my parents. I could afford my own place (I'm full-time employed, very good salary, give my parents $1000 a month for room and board and so on), but what I have works well for me.
I don't smoke, drink, or use drugs, I don't like parties, my dating is platonic, and my parents don't have rules I don't like, so there's little cause for conflict. I help with things like shopping and computer stuff, I get better meals than I could cook myself, etc. My parents are better off, they get extra money instead of some stranger getting it for my rent.
So I don't see a real need to move out, to give up a reasonable situation just to satisfy someone else's idea that I should be 'independent' or something. | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/4/2005 10:32:02 AM | | And i Agree !! He has a wonderful relationship with his parents (that will not be here forever) And i see nothing wrong with his life. After all what kind of women are out there these days at his age that are worth haveing?? | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/4/2005 10:36:03 AM | | Good for you, I feel exactly the same way, Dont know what i would do if not for my son.And he lives 100 miles from ,me, but keep's check on me all the time. Mama's boy's are great . would be nice if there were more of them. | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/4/2005 10:53:25 AM | I got 2 brothers and they still live home w/my parents. I get real upset at times because they are 20 and 23. They do work and beleive it or not my parents wont get down on them for not helping pay something to help them out. Yes my parents work and i do to and i havnt lived home for a few years now. My brothers has try living away from home...but even thur they make good money they say they cant aford it living out there. I do beleive its the parents holding on to them. They live for free......they like to party alot and blow there money. Its sad that they cant grow-up.
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/4/2005 11:32:04 AM | I'm 25 and I live at home once again.......but everyone has their reason to live at home ....I mean some are probably mooches but some of us aren't.....
I own a few houses and have a great career but live at home....my properties are rented out paying themselves off and I pay my mom rent (to help with her mortgage) and I'm saving money so that I can buy the property that I really want.....it was my mom that suggested I move home so that I could get further ahead and because I'm not "with" anyone it made it an easy decision.......can't judge a book by the cover......I work hard to have what I have and so that I can put money away so that someday I"m completely stable and ready to settle down......
is that so wrong?? | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/4/2005 7:50:02 PM | nope, I don't know maybe the guy is just afraid of what the lady will find out so he lies to her. I do have a question though, let's say the guy needs the help. say he has health issuses and still lives at home. what would he been then,or would you even consiter dating him because he has health/mental health issuses? we all have to do what we have to do.
some of us live at home because there no other chose right now.. damn let see things add up,car insurance, plus med bills,doctors, and medication etc.
I think it's stupid that people judge people,or won't even give some one the chance because of what they wear,drive,or live,or live with,or because the have disorders. some of us just have to be lucky we are not half dead on the street with no food,and using plastic bags as pants,and news papers as blankets. | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/4/2005 8:16:01 PM | I think what the OP is ALSO saying here is not all about living with the parents but lying about the parents things and house as their own financial assets
That would make me pretty disgusted too on that point
However - I do agree Unspoiled brings up some good points too. There are some valid reasons for people to live with their parents after 30. Saving money. If I could but I know my mum would drive me crazy, I would LOVE to live with my parents for a year and save almost a years salary. Of course I wouldnt mooch and contribute to food and maintenance and all the rest,
Then there is also large farms and businesses.
isolated properties where children live on the same property as the parents
Looking after ill frail or weak elderly parents
And once I was so sick myself with a virus and I had no partner at the time, I moved back home for a couple of weeks and I would again. Its nice to know they are there
I dont personally live with my parents but i wouldnt be too quick to condem unless I knew the situation and work out are they really " mooching". | |
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Skydvr
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Joined: 8/30/2005
Msg: 42 | |
| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/4/2005 9:26:02 PM | I think it also has a lot to do with the culture, I came from Mexico and even when I am outside of the stereotype, its not unusual for Latin guys to live at home until they get married, of course not acting like they own the house and stuff, that is just plain dumb, I’ve been living on my own since I was 14 years old, I paid for my own college education, twice!, and never ran back home to my mother to pay for my rent, but once again, there are some cute boys that live like that, and they really don’t ever get to grow up, I feel sorry for them, because even when they can save some money, they don’t get to experience the world on their own. BAD BAD BAD! | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/5/2005 1:39:14 AM |
Then there is also large farms and businesses.
I live on a fairly large farm, actually. My parents have owned this farm since I was five years old (I'm 22 at the moment) and I've thought a lot about taking it over eventually. I don't see why me living at home in this situation would be a bad thing. I honestly don't. You can't learn how to run a farm if you're living and working away from home. Anyone who knows anything about farming would say the same thing. | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/5/2005 2:27:31 AM | I'm 25. I live at home, in the basement of my grandmother's house. I work very hard, I make a reasonable amount of money, and could survive on my own. And in new york city, that's saying something. However, I have no current plans or desires to leave this house. I am not expected to leave, and I will not be asked to leave before I get married. It's that simple. I contribute money to the household, based on a discussion I have with my grandmother at the begining of each year. There is no mortgage to pay here, but water, gas, and electricity add up for sure. I also buy most of the groceries- the meat, veggies, potatoes and canned goods. Grandma buys the staples and the cleaners, as well as her own toiletries, but not mine. My grandmother just turned 84. If I get married before she dies, I need to live close enough to check her out a few times a week. This is how it was always expected to be. My mother moved back here with me after my father left us during her maternity leave. Then, when my mother got sick, my grandmother made it plain that she wanted us to stay here. My grandmother and I took care of my mother for a long time, until we had to put her in a home, where she died. My father died of cancer two years before that. Last year, my aunt died. My grandmother and I are each all the family the other has got in America. And we are not about to go our separate ways. It's lonely enough as it is. And even if we did have more family, I still wouldn't move out. I was always expected to be here, in my home until I got married. Maybe it's cultural. My family is from Barbados. I tell you this, when I do leave, I will be sure to have an extra bedroom in case my grandmother needs me. I see nothing wrong with looking out for family. The way I see it, that's what family is for. In fact, this careful preservation of family structure used to be the norm. You know, before the divorce rate skyrocketed above 50%.
Many of my friends, all of whom are older than I, still live at home too. Some of them have great jobs, others, are still struggling to find their way. Still others are what you might call professional students. Each (except the students) pays their own way, contributes meaningfully to the financial needs of the household and respects the rules of the house. I see nothing wrong with this. | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/5/2005 5:32:12 AM | | It all depends on the situation. The ones that "can't" leave home for whatever dysfunctional reason, well, it doesn't take long to figure that out. | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/7/2005 12:05:54 PM | | yes my buttons were pushed earlier as I'm soooooo sick of being judged for things that happen that are not my fault. I don't lie about anything, and I'm not ashamed to still be at home after 30 or whatever. I've seen plenty of the world, taken trips etc. I get along great with my mother (whom I live with) and my father who lives in Port Aransas, I am very blessed to have people in my life who care enough about me to help me out of a soul crushing experience and that's what laneded me back at home. I really wish I could be living this life of being able to stay at home and save up a year's salary but unfortunately my entire salary goes to paying off all the debt my practice wife curse me with when she disappeared with all of my $ w/o warning. So between that and bills, and household expenses I don't ge tot asve much, and what little extra i have here and there I use to buy things I enjoy to help make life tolerable. I guess to sum things up, all i'm saying is don't be quick to judge a person, you never know what they're going through or why they are the way they are etc. Of course there are exceptions like when people do lie about things etc., but at least give the person a chance before assuming that's the case. :) | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 10/7/2005 12:11:53 PM | I don't see the problem with living at home.... just a sec...
Yeah... ok... ok mom... I know...
Sorry. I was just talking to mom and she says that I'm an attractive, fun guy and any girl would be lucky to... just a sec..
Yeah... ok... fine... FINE!!
Sorry. Anyways, I live at home because it just makes the most sense financially see it's pretty expensive where... just a sec..
YES, mom! I KNOW! I SAID I KNOWW!!! JESUS!!!
Sorry. I can't talk right now I have to go out and buy my mom some smokes... | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 3/13/2006 4:11:35 PM | | I dont know who i am talking to, But whomever , If you choose to live at home with your Mother. That is strictly your business,and noone elses. Some people are far to judgemental,If you are careing for your Mother. More power to you. You will be blessed for that. And the people that put you down for it ,will be taught a good lesson sooner or later. | |
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| Mama's boy, devoted son, or dependant???
Posted: 3/13/2006 4:47:41 PM | | Hooray for you Desmo Dog. You are so right . It is very refreshing to know that there are a few very good son's left in this world that care for their parents. The ones that oppose this are not to bright anyhow. so they are easy to ignore. Shotsie | |
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| This is for (I'M your Angel)
Posted: 3/13/2006 4:53:08 PM | From the looks of you growing up is somethong you do not know anything about Your brother 's are probably much more mature than you are. | |
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