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Posted: 9/14/2007 2:56:52 PM | Sticks and stones may break your bones, but names they do excite you...
I'm glad to see those from the lifestyle stand up. On collarme, the rules are known by all and respected...here, in the vanilla world, those in the lifestyle are frowned upon. This is a good place to educate the vanillas that ours isn't a lifestyle of degredation and depravity...it is built on the most solid foundation of trust and respect. Sure, there are bad apples in any bunch, but I prefer the lifestyle bunch where there are standards of conduct and no ambiguities. | |
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Posted: 9/14/2007 3:00:49 PM | Damn checkmate. I need to hang out with you. lol , I would love to be able to do that to some girl. That got me in the mood.  | |
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Posted: 9/14/2007 3:35:27 PM | wow i have to add another two cents worth and say that the post with the thought of it might be by being abused wow far from the truth.
one develops their own personality and that includes sexual activities. i really hate when one blames something from anothers past the problem they might have from anything addictive to the life styles to even why they are poor. if one does this then i am to presume they need justification and a place to lay their blame for what they do.
its easy to lay blame of why i love sex because i had no choice at an early age so anyone i sleep with i cant love and breaks their heart its anothers fault... better yet look ma i sleep with alot cause its all i know wtf.... sounds kind of dumb dont you think.
if one is abused more than likely they will not enjoy anything that reminds them of the past or they fall victim to another abuser....might be a selective few out their but not in any of the posts in this thread for sure. so post wether you like names or not its just that easy and only sexual satisfaction to each their own shoot i have to pack up my box of evidence from my norm life and im sure others agree leave the work at the office and the bills on the desk and hopefully the kids are gone lol.  | |
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Posted: 9/14/2007 4:09:29 PM | | ^^^Yeah, i agree. Most people who've been abused would have a problem with "normal" sex, nbever mind the kinky stuff!!! | |
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Posted: 9/14/2007 4:50:43 PM | There's a difference between being 'abused' during sex (mentally and physically) and being 'abused' outside the bedroom...ie...beatings, rape, etc.
I for one do not like being called the "c" word during sex but if my partner were to say "I'm going to cum inside your ****" when he's about to cum, I find that extremely sexy, especially when he's looking into my eyes....... | |
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Posted: 9/14/2007 9:42:40 PM | | I only like being talked to like that if I am also doing the talking..." yeah you like me almost ripping your d&^% off"...haha i bet you do!!! But the difference men LOVE that!!!! | |
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Posted: 9/14/2007 11:50:54 PM | | I, for one, do not like it. But from a chics perspective, I would think that women do beause we think that it turns guys on. In fear of us losing our man because they want the slutty appeal, we pretend to like it | |
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Posted: 9/15/2007 12:27:32 AM | | it turns me on. i must be a guy trapped in a woman's body. exploring with someone you care about is hot and has nothing to do with fear. i will admit when i was younger, my attitude was different. it has slowly evolved. imho | |
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Posted: 9/15/2007 5:11:56 AM | But the difference men LOVE that!!!!
In my opinion a woman gets way more out of it. Instant change in her mind. It's awesome. Orgasms are twice as strong for her if not more, longer orgasms, a surrender that drives her over the edge, builds deep levels of even more trust, she becomes more productive in her life, she dreams more, more creative. I don't see a down side. Well maybe one, from that point on she knows the difference between men at an even more profound level. A "boy" will never ever do it for her again and that narrows her selective margin even more.
There are a lot of other things involved with that as well. The subject is incredibly vast. Deep levels of the mind. There is a profound responsibility attached to it as you can wreck a woman if you are a creep. Profound responsibility. | |
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Posted: 9/15/2007 5:40:04 AM | | HELLO... havent you all heard of S&M? role play? etc? i personally have never used that language in bed, but i KNOW that many self respecting, upperclass (dare i say ESPECIALLY some of the classiest of people) who know each other well, like to be "degraded" on occasion in bed. its a whole industry! there are MANY women out there who enjoy a little pain etc. do you think its degrading to want to get your a$$ slapped during doggy style or your hair pulled? its all part of the fun for some people - as long as youre with someone you know and trust. this is a VERY common thing. in my opinion it does NOT imply low self esteem, that the person really is a whore, or anything like that. | |
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Posted: 9/16/2007 2:04:04 PM | | Huge turn off. I don't mind hearing the words f_ck me or stick your c_ck in me or even saying pus_y, but don't degrade me by calling me a name that is dog or a prostitute. I have never had that happen, and would probably leave if it ever did | |
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Posted: 9/16/2007 7:23:16 PM | | Crazy. I am currently lucky enough to be with a girl who enjoys some seriously dirty names in bed, and she has no problems with self esteem or sexual abuse. As crazycurlz says, can we say "role play" people? There is no one in the world that I love and respect more than my girlfriend, and I also love that she gets turned on by the games we play and the things I call her. *shrugs* | |
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Posted: 9/16/2007 11:10:01 PM | Some women like to feel totally dominated, totally humiliated. A lot of women have a "rape" fantasy. Of course, they don't want to be raped in real life, but they do want to act out such a fantasy.
The best way to find out what make turn a woman on or off is to watch some porn and she how she reacts to certain acts and ask her what she thinks of them. | |
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Posted: 9/17/2007 6:46:22 AM | | i like it to a point more the bad words as apposed to name calling but the odd name isn't so bad it's how comfortable you are together and i would agree it's a safer more aggresive roll and i like it aggresive. of course i like it gentle to just not to often haha! | |
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Posted: 9/17/2007 7:42:14 AM | | If the woman likes this sort of thing, it's probably a clue that she might not be relationship material, guys. One clue is that she's done this before and she likes misogynistic men. If she hates herself, how could she possibly ever love you. | |
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Posted: 9/17/2007 8:04:12 AM | Hell I was just talking about just passionate sex. Wasn't even thinking about S&M or major role playing. lol
I don't think the OP was either. :) | |
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Posted: 9/17/2007 10:01:10 AM |
If the woman likes this sort of thing, it's probably a clue that she might not be relationship material, guys. One clue is that she's done this before and she likes misogynistic men. If she hates herself, how could she possibly ever love you.
i take offense to that. and i thought this had been covered. just because you like to role play doesn't mean you hate yourself. i love it and i am relationship material, but it will be with someone that is into the same things i am. wow, the stereotyping that goes on here... | |
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Posted: 9/17/2007 10:09:34 AM | I have to say, I thought I had heard it all here on POF, but I am really surprised by the narrow mindedness of some of the posters regarding this topic.
If the woman likes this sort of thing, it's probably a clue that she might not be relationship material, guys. One clue is that she's done this before and she likes misogynistic men. If she hates herself, how could she possibly ever love you.
First of all, It takes a very confident woman to be able to "role play" in this manner. Any woman who hated herself, wouldn't be able to deal with it. They wouldn't be able to keep the "role playing" seperate from reality.
Secondly, I can assure you that the type of men who are into this, are anything but misogynistic. It's about possession, not aggression. It's not about hating the woman, but loving her, and owning her and making her completely yours in that moment. | |
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