| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/10/2006 7:02:53 PM | | Hey I am a 21 yr old getting out of a 4yr relationship with my babies daddy and how exactly one do u bounce back from verbal abuse and then try and balance ur life with trying to find work and a dating life is it possible? I have no idea how some people do the single parent thing but its hard and I am still young ya I know but some days I wish someone understood what I was going through | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/10/2006 7:54:56 PM | | hello countrygirl i do understand what you are going through. i went through alot of hard times with the same situation except im the father.i had to figure alot of things out on my own but we made it.just do your best and never let your kids go a day without telling them you love them.always make sure the guy you date knows you and your kids come as a package deal,if he shys away from that then you are wasting your time.family should always be no#1. your kids will be there when he wont.you half to take care of your kids first and worry about dating later.being lonely sucks but it will get better,trust me im doing it again but thats just the way it works sometimes. | |
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ns1014
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Joined: 1/8/2006
Msg: 254 | |
| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/18/2006 8:04:16 AM | Hi Journeyman and COuntry girl,
I am rarely on this site ... read through some of your articles (?what do you call these things?).....
Great stuff. Sorry to hear some of what you wrote Journeyman. Tough story! But I think it is all good in that it makes us stronger.....may sound a bit 'hokey' but that old saying "what doesn't kill us makes us stronger" I believe is true.
Many people ahve responded to this topic and there is some pretty interesting perspectives but here's what I think...
I think whether you are a girl or guy, being single and having children adds another aspect to any potential relationship which make it more challenging to find a suitable partner. The main thing is not to "settle".
I haven't been on this site for a long time and this is my first stab at one of these but from my experience, (and I know many singles with children) people get so beat up or discouraged because they meet people who are interested and that changes once they find out they have kids, that they settle for peole they wouldn't necessarily be interested in just because of the fact that they accept them.....
To eahc their own, but I think that there are many good people out there who will accept you and your children .... and if they don't then you have to understand their perspective. It does not mean that they are bad or wrong for doing so....however, there is someone out there for each of us that will accept us for who we are and that includes our personalities, looks, economic situation, familial situation etc etc.
For you countrygirl, kudos to you for staying focused on your child....it is tough to be so young with so much responsibility...hope you have family and friends who are also there to provide support from time to time.....
Hope things wortk out for you both....all the best. | |
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ns1014
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Joined: 1/8/2006
Msg: 255 | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/18/2006 11:42:44 AM | | Hi there. I am a father of three and I find it difficult to date women with out children because they dont understand the commitment and financial help that is needed. At least we can agree that being a parent comes first.. Also we have something in common. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/18/2006 3:16:06 PM | Well, I raised 4 boys from 2 mothers that were drug addicts and worse. They had 2 kids each and someone had to be a parent so I took the job and seem to have done okay. Now the kids are grown and gone and I would love to find a lady that is White, Asian, Viet or Thai and is a single Mommy to date. Keep in mind that I am 51 (so most females think I am close to death or so old as to be useless) and I am self employed (but not rich which is the other reason most women want no part of me) and I am stable.
Maybe someone will get in touch. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/18/2006 5:03:13 PM | Yes we are here. Ive been raising my two boys for close to 5 years now. I would actually prefer to date a single mother because I would think she would be more settled down and looking for a more sincere relationship. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/19/2006 1:42:39 PM | | No I wouldn't want to date a woman with a kid. That would creat al sorts of problems not to mention that the woman would want a husband and that is something that I am not ready for. Maybe you shouldn't of had a kid to begin with if you are having problems finding quality men. And if you are young with a child and want someone that isn't a scumbag well most men are probably going to hold it against you that you were irresponsible enough to bring a child into the world when you weren't ready. IE established in a stable job, house, ect... Having a child and still being in college doesn't really work that kid needs 120% of your attention. Ok well that's off on a tangent that I could rave about for hours. My advice to you if you are havin trouble with men. Then don't date them. And next time bag that shit and get on the pill it's not that hard.... | |
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love76
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Joined: 12/7/2005
Msg: 261 | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/19/2006 9:45:48 PM | | As soon as you find some, please let me know.. The guys I talk to on here have kids but are afraid of anyone elses.. My 2 sons are 12 and 13 and that seems to scare the crap out of alot of so called guys.. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/19/2006 9:53:46 PM | | I am a single mother of 2 boys . They are 12 and 13 and I have been taking care of them since they were born by myself and it's been a hard journey but well worth it. Without my sons, who knows where i would be right now... I commend you for being there for your children and being the mommy and the daddy.. I have played both rolls for ever it seems because the father was an idiotic drug head, that he put his drugs before his family and then got caught and was sent to prison in 1993, 3 months after we got married . My oldest son was 3 months old and i had just gotten pregnant with my youngest when he left.. Then i found out that he got 2 other women pregnant at the same time and my whole world was shattered, but not anymore.. I have my life back to normal and i divorced him 5 years ago, but have been afraid to date.. My children have never seen thier father and it wasn't even my fault.. But like I said, it takes a real man to be a daddy, and from your thread, you are the best dad any child can have... Keep up the good work, man.. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/19/2006 10:00:59 PM | Hey sweetie, I have been in your shoes before and it does suck for now but you will be rewarded in the end . Dating is the hard part, you just have to manage your time for your baby and then you might have time for a life outside your home.. It took me almost 5 years to get to the dating stage and it was a scary thing to start over doing.. You are still young and you have your life and your child's life ahead of you and whatever man you decide to date can't accept you and your child together, then he is not a man at all.. Keep up the good work, and please keep your head up and stay strong for your baby, he or she will need it every step of the way.. Don't forget to let your baby know you love him/her everyday (they strive on that love)..
Best Wishes and Good Luck
Samantha(hotmomma75060) | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/19/2006 11:02:59 PM | | I can tell you ..they do exist. But you can't knock childless men who choose not to date us. There are lots of single fathers out there as well who are starting a new life just like us. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/20/2006 11:33:47 AM | | I know what you mean!!! lol!!! I am a mom of 4 kids ages 20 yrs, 17 yrs, 11 yrs and 8 yrs. I am attractive, kind, honest and independent but, having kids seems to scare men off! Let me know if and when you find the answer to your question! Trish... | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/20/2006 6:08:50 PM | Me too! I am not bad looking and self supporting, so why can't I find a man? I think it's because I have a teen son. Once they find that out, scat they go.
Where are you good guys? | |
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cdr04
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Joined: 7/19/2005
Msg: 271 | |
| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/20/2006 7:11:07 PM | | I here ya bro, I have my 5 year old bot full time and dont have alot of suport for baby sitting so my time to date is very small. Thing there are women beating down my door. I have a good job, have a small house but sadly prefer the company of my 5 year old over most women these days.....they just seem different..... | |
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cdr04
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Joined: 7/19/2005
Msg: 272 | |
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cdr04
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Joined: 7/19/2005
Msg: 273 | |
| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/20/2006 7:15:24 PM | | yes we are out there but i feel us guys who have a child full time get looked down on for it. i love my son and give my life to him without regret but feel that women just dont understand why i would | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/20/2006 8:02:01 PM | Loads of women in here...I'm gonna take a shot at this...just an opinion and I mean well...so please don't pounce...it's an opinion from results to date...."MY" experiences....k!
I will date women with kids and I have 3 of my own. I find first that if they aren't close by I have to do the commute as...they have the kids more so than the Dads...that's cool...I'm ok with that. The problem is the routine, the rules and most it seems are looking for someone to help with the chores. I've actually had woman tell me they look forward to someone Helping out.
Well...what about me. I have 3 teen kids first of all. I also have my own place...and very simple...an apt....women seem to want their homes. So I come and go as I please and quite active with my kids....skating, skiing, fishing...tonnes of fishing. Pardon me....but I have my life as such, that my HOME isn't the "be all and end all" and I live life and have fun. Women I find....extremely serious...too serious at times...again the ones I've met in my experiences, before I get slammed and it's my experience and opinion.
Point....the complaint I hear....guy to guy.....they don't wanna be bored with a routine. They aren't there to do your work. The funny one....they say when things go bad they hear from the woman..."Oh what about the kidssssssssss" and guys....they don't want that...like soap to a skunk.
Then one last thing....It's a womans domain their home...and ohhhhhhh so hard to be comfortable there with her rules(mostly because of the kids) and such , which most don't acknowledge as they take it for granted so easily.
In the end...would I date a woman with kids...yes...and I see so many rewarding things...like the love from her kids as they grow older...can never have enough kids around. But remember to make the guy comfortable...and not scare him away. Right now though it's gaining on me to be very cautious...and that may change to why bother.
I could go on...said my piece...hope no one slams me.....for the usual...generalizations, bitter, negativity, sad feelings, knot in your panties(wasn't me).....it's there for thought...k
If you do have to say it....hold that thought and say it in the mirror...k
The title is "do men actually exist that date women with kids" and this guy said well...kinda...YES...but damn afraid.....k | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/21/2006 4:37:59 AM | | What most single parents don't seem to understand is that they are asking for alot and the pool of people willing to give it is small,most men either want their own children or none at all,right or wrong that is the way it is and God bless the one's who are willing to be the surragate father/mother or role model,they are few in number.The same goes for women,they most often want their own children,the best course of action is to either make it work if at all possible with the one you made the children with and in this day and age there is no reason to get pregnant unless you want to,the key words are responsability and common sense,lamenting the fact that few want to parent other people's kids is a waste of time.The other option is to stay by yourself until your kids are grown. | |
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