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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/29/2007 7:47:52 PM | Ladies: Here is my opinion and the opinion of every man i know. I am divorced and have two children. I must fight to see my children because my ex for some unknown reason believes that she can right all the wrongs i have done onto her, by not permitting me to spend quality time with our children. I support my children in every manner possible and know that one day they will learn the truth of the matter. I have absolutely zero respect for any parent who does not support their child to the best of their ability.
If i get involved with a woman with two children such as i have and something should go wrong, i will have more bills to take care of! Is it worth it to risk destroying that which i can offer my children, in order to get married once again and possibly fall in love. It is the men who in the overwhelming majority of cases, are left taking care of the bills when relationships go to hell in a hand basked. Support payments are not negligible but rather significant!!
Men are terrified of commitment after a divorce! Ladies are looking for it again! How may previously unmarried men are willing to marry a woman with children? How many of those marriages last? Take a look at Stats Can statistics, they really are not encouraging. Our family law system sucks! There is not incentive for couples to stay married. One will get burned for support while the other gets custody of the children.
The laws are designed to make money for the attorneys, destroy families and permit the powers that be, to exercise a significant level of control over the low and middle classes. MEN are terrified to commitment once they have tasted the family law system!!!
In closing, i can tell you all that i personally know of three men who have been married more then once and now pay support to two different women and one which pays to three women. They all live at the poverty line due to their errors!!! Is this what we call love and is best for our children?? I don't believe so!!! | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/29/2007 11:07:42 PM | A lil bit about me, I am a single dad, my 10 yr old son lives with me, i have custody. We live in lil chalet in the mountains of PA. I only date when he goes to visit his mother for the holidays or summer vacation. My life is full of work and fun. In leisure time i dream of being united in a relationship with a woman like you. I believe one day i will find her, and she will be as in to me as i would in her.
Brian | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/31/2007 7:13:32 PM | | I have recently fallen for my next door neighbor. She has 2 kids, is 29 years of age and seperated from her husband. I find her to be very calm, cool, and collect, even though her life is in knots because of her financial issues. She may have 2 kids, but it doesn't change the way I feel about her. So to answer your question, I am a man who is willing to date a woman with children. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/31/2007 7:45:01 PM | MOST MEN WILL. Men learn very early on, MOST WOMEN HAVE KIDS, if you can't get along with the kids, then just get along. This site, as well as any other have several men on it, Try picking a man, message him and see where it goes. Not the one you want, pick another.
I seriously doubt there is a shortage of men.
But there is a shortage of GROWN UPS, that do not have kids. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 1/31/2007 10:41:13 PM | Well said, and the idea of being taking for child support for kids that do not belong to me just makes me sick. Where I live you don't even need to get married to get hosed for child support on kids that do not belong to you, all you need to do is be the nice guy that tries to play a father roll to the kids because their dead beat dad isn't around.
I don't think that the men are the problem as much as family laws is to blame. How can any get in a serious relationship when you need to step around legal issues to avoid getting burned is the relationship does not last forever. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/1/2007 4:14:27 AM | I'm a single dad with a 6 yr. old son. The trouble is, being single, my son is always with me wherever I go, and people just "assume" that I am married, or "unavailable."
Personally, I would date a woman because I am interested in her. It shouldn't matter if she has children or not. I am not dating her kids. However, if after dating for a while and things start to get serious, I would think that how her kids feel about me is very important as well.
Prior to my last relationship with my son's mom, I started dating a divorced woman with a son. It was on our 3rd date (day at the beach) that I finally met him. He was soooo cute! To make a long story short, I eventually started to feel as if I "WAS" his dad. And I really wanted to be.
That relationship ended badly, and I really got hurt from it. But that's another story. If you want to know more, just contact me and we could talk about it.
Oops! I'm starting to ramble on and on... Anyway, yes, there are men who would date women with kids. I know of at least one! hehe | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/1/2007 12:18:57 PM | I met the mother of my son at work and she had already a little boy, I think the main problem is that most people hide the fact that they have a child or children till the last moment. And as for me i find it very hard to find a women who wants to date a 23 yr old man with a child.
Where are the women who date single fathers? | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/1/2007 8:48:28 PM | i have a question as to why to alot of women appoligize or say hope it don't bother you for having your kids? i was raised by a single mom and yes there are men out there ladies. but, being on your own makes you much stronger,independent and no pun intended.. picky.. because you are protecting your kids. don't ever say sorry.
i personally think men get scared wen they realize the responsibity of caring for a child which is totally true and common..but as to getting past dating i think its more bout getting him to realize the possible FRIENDSHIP he can develop with your kid after you see what he has to offer first. there are great step-parents out there..male or female.. its bout stepping up and seeing there is more than one realationship you have to accept and love all involved....and thats all i havta say bout that.. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/1/2007 10:30:29 PM | There are both men and women that will either not date someone with kids or not want to date someone because they already have kids. I wouldn't want to date someone that was not going to want to be a whole part of my life. If you have kids grown or not , they are part of the package. Some people just need to grow up, so move on. Mine are grown, but I have lost my stepdaughter because her father is a Jerk. I am by law her stepmother until she is 19 she is currently 13 and he doesn't give her the choice and unfortunetaly neither does the law, but gee he sure is after my money. haha.....go figure. Remember when you do get involved it isn't a game, people and kids end up getting hurt , so if you don't want to go down that road then it is best to stay true to your own convictions. Kandy | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/1/2007 10:33:33 PM | | Well for any of you out in cyber wonderland , if you think that your gonna get hosed , used, taken advantage of for some one elses kids, then get a prenup and if she gots hers then when you get your loser ass kicked to the curb. Just keep on steppin. It goes both ways. | |
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babs3
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Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 1462 | |
| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/2/2007 12:18:36 AM | I wanted to respond to Lustra and Ronin's posts.
There is only one situation where you would be in the position of being held responsible legally for child support for kids that aren't yours. If you choose to move in and live with a spouse who has children. What I cannot understand, is why would anyone move in with someone with children, before having a committed relationship such as marriage. If your not sure it will last....don't move in! I think the law surrounding this issue is discouraging people from making the same mistake over and over. Dating a woman with kids is entirely different than moving yourself in with them. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/2/2007 7:01:39 AM | I could not agree more with your intelligent asessment of our awful (justice) system. I have been fighting to get a agreed visitation custody order and after four years in the court system have come up with nothing, back to point A. It has been the worst, most corrupt, inefficient totally useless thing I have ever been involved in. Attorneys are scum, period.
You are accurate about the laws, the court system caters to it's own. I hope God has a deluxe version of hell set aside for judges, magistrates, attorneys and all the rest of the garbage that preys on people in the courts. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/2/2007 7:58:56 AM | <---- Yup I sure do...
Have to love those Yummy Mummy's... infact, in the next few months here we will be engaged...
Thanks POF...
Just will not be producing anymore Minnows for the future pond...
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/3/2007 4:22:05 PM | | A woman who has kids is not an issue for me. If anyone reads my profile there are things about me a woman will have to accept. Yes I will say I think most men do want to date a woman with kids. Don't ask why they just are like that. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/3/2007 4:45:34 PM | | Ohhhhh!!!!! We are out here. I find the same, though, when a woman finds that I am raising my 8 y/o son on my own. Especially in the females over 25 and no kids/do not want kids crowd. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/3/2007 8:04:04 PM | There are lot's of of single mom's out there who know matter what do not want to be alone but are also the ultimate man haters. I myself have a very good relationship with my ex and I actually think that is because we were never silly enough to get married, when we found out about the TWINS.....Yes Twins now how many of you are running for the hills.
I love my children and they come first this is where I seem to have problems with men. I fit you into my schedule around my children.....Is that wrong? I don't think so because I manage to have a good social life you just have to have patience. I dated a man with children and he was the most protective single parent I had ever met, but with patience and understanding we were able to enjoy a great relationship. We are still friends to this day! I never met his children and he never met mine, you can date without involving the kids until you are sure!
Anyways this is just a bunch of various thoughts strung together, but I think everyone has that someone out there, it just takes patience when you are least expecting it they will pop into your lives. Have a great day! I wish you peace, love and happiness!  | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/3/2007 11:56:13 PM | Hell yes there is! Why would it matter? It all has to do with the bond you and your partner create. If it is a good one, then it wouldn't matter if your partner had 11 fingers, or 15 kids. Once you find the right person, nothing else matters.
I am a divorced father of three, and dating has been a nightmare, I am not damaged goods, or have the plague, I simply have parental responsibilities to fulfill. It is just as hard for single fathers as it is for single mothers.
One thing really bothers me though about looking the POL or other sites profiles. Most single mothers say that their children are their world. True, they should be your #1 priority, but your world should be to take care of yourself first. In a few years, your kids are going to grow up and leave home and your going to find yourselves by yourselves. Whether you put the kids #1 or not, they will leave you, and then what do you do? If you take the time to find an open-minded partner with or without kids, who is willing to accept you for who you are, you will never be alone in the end.
Later | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/4/2007 1:59:37 AM | | The same goes for single Dad's, you woman are fine thinking that I am a divorced weekend Dad, but you change when you find out that ...no...I am a full time single Dad. I dont bring baggage...I bring a great couple of fun kids | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/5/2007 6:25:06 PM | I do believe that they exist. I have been "dating" a guy for three months and he JUST met me boys yesterday. I had a super bowl party and had a bunch of friends over. They met him as one of my friends. They are still getting used to the idea of their dad and myself not being together.
I introduced my "friend" as a friend that I met at work. We were very distant the whole day and only my close adult friends knew who he was and why he was there. I plan on introducing him officially to my boys when school is out and they have more time to adjust to the idea.
He is fine with the decisions I have made and he has been with me since my separation from my husband and understands the arrangement and decisions that my ex- and I have agreed upon. We have also talked that if there is anything that he needs to address my ex- about in reference to the children that it needs to go through me. If there is anything that he needs to talk to my ex-about in reference to me, he is more than welcome to address that himself.
My ex- was very verbally abusive to me and didn't care who was around. My "friend" has had to put him in place a few times and will continue to do so as long as I want him to. But anything to do with my three boys needs to go through me. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/5/2007 6:40:17 PM | There really are a lot of men that would be more then happy to date women with kids. We also realize that it is a package deal (not baggage) and are fine with that. Many of us also have a lot of experience with kids.
Unfortunately most not all single moms will not even consider someone who has never had kids of their own. I am one such person. I helped raise 5 kids with my ex common for 17 yrs, yet Due to the fact that I have never had my own kids I am not wanted. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/6/2007 7:05:00 AM | | Good day ladies, I find it rather complicated when single parents date. Whether its single moms or dads there is always a line between their kids and the ones they are to meet. Being that when your daughters for instance warm up to a guy in hopes that he will stick around and then the guy runs. You think it is because he is scared. That may be but please put this into consideration for the next time as I know I have done the same, however I kept in contact and never ran away entirely. But I find when the kids start warming up the opposing partner is left with a paradox of choices being.... How do they, will they feel, what kind of influence am I, is there father/mother still around, am I to be expected to do certain things, what does he/she expect from me, what happens if it doesnt work... will the kids be heartbroken again, will it damage them, psycologically. ANyways you get the idea.... Not everyone is running scared but may be just thinking of lasting consequences in relation to the child(ren). I have two kids of my own with two different woman and still manage to have a decent to great relationship with both mothers. Yet they do not live with me, it has still caused me great conflict in dating due to the fact that I have always put my children first. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/6/2007 8:48:57 AM | | I prefer a women with children since I have kids myself from my previous marriage. Then again I really like kids. It tells you pretty fast about someones character how they feel about children. Many men feel are protectors and feel the same waHow nice to have a woman who understands life is not just about herself too. | |
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| do men actually exist that date women with kids??
Posted: 2/6/2007 8:50:27 AM | I prefer a women with children since I have kids myself from my previous marriage. Then again I really like kids. It tells you pretty fast about someones character how they feel about children. Many men are protectors and feel the same way.
How nice to have a woman who understands life is not just about herself too. | |
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