| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/4/2008 7:55:03 AM | Take turns right from the start while getting to know each other........
If he invites you out to dinner, let him pay, and take your turn by inviting him some place or cooking a dinner for him. If she invites you to some activity, let her pay, and do something for her the next time.
The whole point here is to become closer, enjoy one another, and find out if you have the chemistry and connection to want more, and no one should be taken advantage of during this process.
Equality is key here, and making each other feel as comfortable and equal as one can will enhance the dating and relationship quest..... 
Just my opinion......   | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/4/2008 8:16:08 AM | Well.....you refer to her as a female friend. I'm wondering if this is JUST a friend or someone that you are hoping to reach the next level with. If she is a friend, I'd definitely bring it to her attention. If it's someone that you might want something more with, I think it needs to be handled a little more delicately. Some women are just under the impression that the man should ALWAYS pay. I, on the other hand do not believe that and I ALWAYS offer or pitch in.
Maybe you could suggest going somewhere a little less expensive next time and tactfully make a joke about the cost of your prior dates.....there is a way to handle it without it being offensive.
I think it boils down to how much do you like this girl? Is it worth going broke over? | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/4/2008 8:40:21 AM | Women have already paid and paid dearly ~ who took care of you went all you could do was slober and crap your pants ~ for 12 to 20 months?
Who seen that you were fed when you were luck to find you toes and get them in your mouth? Five ~ 10 times a day ~~ forever! it seems.
Who made your bed and cleaned your cloths ~ for years!
Who taught you things! ~ like words and feeling and how to play nice.
Who did this? ~ some woman ~ but rarly a man ~ maybe a pack of wolfs!
So you ask ~ when should women start paying ~ ? ~ It's a pay forward situation my friend ~ if you can't afford to spend a little money on her ~ just say so!
She'll most likly to be happy to pay ~ and if she really like you ~ do so much more.
~dar | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/4/2008 10:03:07 AM | | I believe in paying my half every time. I hate women that use men or men that use women for money and for what they can get from them. Any self respecting woman would pay her way from the first date! | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/4/2008 10:25:29 AM | That exactly right a mother ~ and unless you ladies see yourselfs as not ever being one ~~ men should take condideration of the fact. ~ That you have the potential to be one and conduct hisself accordingly.
If you have ever raise or help raise a child ~ it's not" then" ~~ until you ~ you realize that it' almost impossible to pay back ~ so paying forward makes sense.
But I understand ~ that the line of thought for the thread and ~ is not going there. ~
We are in the bean counting phase ~ the finiancing the evening with limited budgets and attempting to maintance some level of independence and posture among strangers.
It funny ~ for most of us ~ the bean counting don't seem to ever end. ~ Many times a loaf of bread and a gallon of milk was hard to produce ~ with two people working.
I don't know when a woman should pay ~ ! I don't ~ things are so screwed up there days.
A 22 years old woman in a $120.00 dress , an 80 dollar pair of pumps, $7.00 stocking
$25.00 dollars worth of costume jewely working a front desk can easyly make more money then and young man that got 7 years in trade, a $ 5000.00 dollar truck and $ 2000.00 worth of tools. ~ ~ So things have been stood on their ear as far as money and making sense. ~
I guess ~ you really need to just "like" each other before getting to far down the "Yellow Brick Road" ~ dar | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/4/2008 4:49:42 PM | | I think people should take turns paying. I feel guilty if a guy pays all the time. If Im dating the same guy more than once I offer to pay the second time if I can and if they insist on paying still then I will insist the third date. | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/4/2008 5:03:15 PM | Tell her that your not sure if you can afford to go out again and ask her if it's going to be her treat.
Just because you're a man doesn't mean that you have to pay for everything. Hell I'd be so pissed off if I were you I'd take her out let her order and then tell the waiter to split the bill
Or you could just tell her how you're feeling. If she cares for you at all she will understand this it 2008 and she is a working woman. I'm sure when you've paid in the past you paid with a smile on your face, she may have no idea how you feel so just tell her. | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/4/2008 5:15:50 PM | | Speaking from experience your both fairly young and if the relationship isn't physical and you don't plan on a long time affair then girlfriend should have already made some attempt to pay for an evening out. Try restaurant's that are less exspensive and keep alcoholic beverages at a 2 glass minimum if you drink. You have to ask yourself what you want out of this and decide for yourself if she is worth it. Goood luck. | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/5/2008 9:26:46 PM |
Need some advice, i have been on 3 dates with the female friend of mine, and i have had to pay each time. Now i am not complaining, except for the fact the average cost for each night was roughly $100, and she never offered to pay once. Like Seinfeld "There wasn't even a reach".
What the heck is up with that,
You are an idiot. You have created this situation by being the typical guy. That is being desperate, wanting something, trying to create situations where you are the provider,thus maybe she should give her goods. Stop that. It is not working, it is not going to work.
I personally believe that unless a woman invest in you, she really doesn't give a f√ck about you. there. So get over.
But you are the guy, you take control. How. Ask her. Did you enjoy this? Cool. So when are you going to invite me to dinner? She may say, I don't have any money. So you say, Okay, you're going to cook for me? Or am I just a ticket meal?
Hey dude. My gf does stuff for me. From dinner at an expensive restaurant to other stuff. But I do the same. It's all about balance and reciprocity, not use and being used. | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/5/2008 9:38:52 PM | A 22 years old woman in a $120.00 dress , an 80 dollar pair of pumps, $7.00 stocking
$25.00 dollars worth of costume jewely working a front desk can easyly make more money then and young man that got 7 years in trade, a $ 5000.00 dollar truck and $ 2000.00 worth of tools. ~ ~ So things have been stood on their ear as far as money and making sense. ~
Hmm. You just touched me.
Don't get any ideas.
My girlfriend just spend $150 on a dress for our Christmas party, after returning two other dresses. Plus $50 in accessories, and $100 at Victoria's Secrets and $50 on the babysitter. Result, priceless. Next, restaurant, babe, totally on me, and don't argue get that desert you want!! | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/5/2008 9:54:29 PM | Whoever asks should pay...they are inviting you out. This is no different than if they invited you to their home for dinner--they certainly wouldn't be expecting you to pay then.
If you choose to go out with this woman again, when the bill comes don't reach for your wallet this time. Thank her for inviting you to dinner (or whatever) and wait for her to pay. If she doesn't then have a look at the bill; put in your share and tell her what she owes. | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/5/2008 10:11:45 PM | i like what dancecard has to say. I have agreed with him before too. What the heck ever happened to chivalry, and courting? I have never paid for a date and wouldn't expect too. I am not high maintenance by any means but I think that if a guy isn't generous enough or manly enough to insist on paying for dates than he is not the kind of man I want. When did this controvery over paying for dates begin? I have noticed it alot of these forums. Men pay for dates, thats the way it is. I will GLADLY cook dinner for my guy anytime and pay for everything that goes into that, but as far as a date I expect to be treated like a lady.
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/5/2008 10:19:09 PM | 'Pay'? Pay? , we been Payin...for
Oh, not 'what' was meant
(nevermind) *shriiiinks* away.....in shame , for 'kneejerk....
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/5/2008 11:23:07 PM | This issue is...
If a guy has been communicating with a woman on this site or any other for some period of time, with email's and phone calls where you get to know the person and then you go out on a 'date'.. most guys wouldn't have a problem paying..but in these days..some women are independent and feel it's an insult for the man to pay.
The other scenario on here if you're actively dating is many women and men don't want to spend the time 'getting to know one another' partly due to a lot of misrepresentation by both sexes...so lots of people are now 'meeting' very soon. Thus the issue. If you're actively looking for a relationship as a man..and you go on 1-3 dates/meetings a week like we all do from time to time it proves challenging if it's always dinner...unless the man is quite well off.
I think if more people insisted on a 'coffee' date the first 'meeting'..to establish chemistry, instead of women or men insisting on dinner dates when they don't even know one another..(ie leave something to build..)..this column wouldn't exist..
Frequency of dating has a bearing...how many of you ladies and gents date/meet at least once a week on average...if not more.
Thus to my point.....see the next forum! | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/6/2008 9:25:53 AM | annik.......
Kudos to you my forum friend for stating what many of us believe, try to live, and respect women as our equal.........
Since women have been demanding equality for ages, and are slowly getting to that point in society, there are many things that equality takes on, and the dating ritual is one of them, along with financial stability, independence, and the opportunity to not only think equal, but act it......
Just my opinion........ | |
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| When should the woman start paying??
Posted: 1/6/2008 10:20:19 AM | This is 2007: EQUAL rights and responsibilities.
I do not believe that generations of women have fought long and hard simply to have some birdbrain chicks throw it all away by insisting that the man pay for everything.
Well, true...some do not even realize that by insiting that they have to be paid everything everytime simply to have their charming presence is in fact a form of... pay for charms....yes you got it: prostitution. surprise!
no, if you want to be reconized as a whole person, an independent, free thinking, responsible person...you grab half of it...or pay the next time. | |
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