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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 8/8/2006 2:19:09 AM | | you go to Amazon.com and look for the book "STOP PAYING FOR SEX! 1001 household items and the uses you never knew they had" | |
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Dr.
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Joined: 1/17/2006
Msg: 178 | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 8/8/2006 11:59:24 AM | When recognizing parts from the 700 sex channels...and at a party say Oh that's a re run!
When the Tim Hortons server is cuter than you remember'd him being yesterday morning!
When the 60 yr olds that message you start to LOOK GOOD! | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 8/8/2006 9:01:37 PM | … you cannot pee standing up.
… it takes an hour to write a post because you have to keep cleaning your keyboard.
… you get jealous walking through the produce isle thinking of all the action the cucumbers are getting.
… all women who posted in this thread are now in you favorites. | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 8/8/2006 9:05:20 PM | When you get excited hearing your on a stranges favorite list.
When you see this smilie  as erotic.
When you get turned on by this smilie  | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 8/9/2006 6:36:12 PM | The local video store has to clear out the rest of the customers when you walk into the porn section.
For guys: Your priest is beginning to wonder why you keep asking to be an altar boy when you're over the age of 20.
You check this thread on a daily basis for new and interesting ideas.
You're in jail and you seem to have a problem holding onto the soap. | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 8/14/2006 7:56:41 PM | kalikat:
... You're in jail and you seem to have a problem holding onto the soap.
... you're having a shower at home, but you're not holding the soap.
(women) ... having a shower you keep losing the soap. | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 9/1/2006 4:08:25 PM | you need a new pair of underwear, every time the wind blows.
you buy a fan. ( see previous line)
you drive 100 miles to the nearest ABS and buy a ticket to the theater, and its only 9AM.
your favorite sock is getting crusty.
your favorite SOCKS are getting crusty.
you refer to your dates for the weekend as Ms Rosy Palm nad her Five Sisters.
you go BI, since you will have twice the prospects.
you have been surfing online dating sites for years, and still, have yet to get laid or even meet someone from those sites.
your IM has hundreds of contacts, but are NEVER online.
you talk with those Russian, Ghanan, Malaysian, etc scam "girls" because they like it when you talk dirty to them, just send $500 please and I will buy a ticket to visit you.
you keep sending $500. | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 9/3/2006 5:45:57 AM | (ladies) When his powertools start to turn you on
you want the music up louder in the car (for the vibrations)
(Gents) you masturbate in the shower, then the rain turns you on
you see a beaver (the animal) and start gettin dirty thoughts
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 10/1/2006 9:26:54 PM | Fan you are one of the funniest person in here. You may have a dirty mind but keep em comin Im LMAO. | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 11/25/2006 10:05:45 PM | FOR WOMEN................You're turned on by a man in uniform, and it's Cliff, the mailman from "Cheers".
FOR MEN.................When you start cruising the nursing homes looking for "hot single chicks". | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 11/25/2006 10:20:18 PM | Men ; FemBot 2000 will be built ! Even if it means using the kid's college fund !
Women ; You wonder if you can teach your dog, just one more trick and it ain't play dead. | |
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| You Know Youre Too Horny When...
Posted: 11/25/2006 10:39:42 PM | For Gals:
When every skyscraper looks extremely phallic.
When you find yourself really wanting to rub up against said skyscraper.
When Kermit the Frog looks f**ckable.
When you start keeping all the P**nis picks that the sicko freaks send you via email or IM.
When you start looking for the Sawz-All playtoy attachments.
For Guys:
When you know Ms. Piggy must be absolutely wild in the sack.
When you find that you're getting hot over all the female characters in your children's cartoons (go outside and play now so daddy can watch cartoons).
When you masturbate to pics of Phyllis Diller (or Michael Jackson for that matter). (ok, yes, I hit some serious grossness there.)
When cows udders get you hot (for breast men).
And for both:
When your mouse and or keyboard stop working because you've gotten so much lube, or what not, on them while looking at dirty pics on your computer. | |
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