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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?      Home login  
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 chasingangel
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 276
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?Page 12 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
newgate, very nicely put, reality check 101. As I said before I'm a Army Brat, and I seen first hand what the army is like. I seen dad when he came home and I seen mom when he left. Us kids were her support system as she ours. My brothers were all army as well as my exbrother in law. It's not an easy life, but if you truely love someone then you can make it work. Love, and Trust are the top things you need. Communication even though it will be slim, is you lifeline. Phone calls and Letters, remember you have it hard at home, but they have it harder fighting for our country.

I was engaged to a Navy XO. He was on the Agusta, she was a fast attack sub.
He was gone anywhere from 2 weeks to 6 months at a time. No contact, no nothing for the whole duration. All I got was a call from the base saying to be at the gates at whatever time they came in. Short little 1 min call was all I got.
What happend, why no marriage you ask. He was killed by a drunk driver.

The Marines say is best: SEMPER FI " ALWAYS FAITHFUL".
 ManeRider
Joined: 5/22/2005
Msg: 277
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 10/16/2006 4:36:11 PM
No.

Not no, but hell no
 shinxy
Joined: 3/5/2006
Msg: 278
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 10/16/2006 4:41:01 PM
Thank you, sailor50

His life is so complicated right now after getting hurt, but we are trying. It certainly isn't easy but I have been through the past year with him. I can't see throwing that away. If anything, we have become best friends. His wife filed separation while he was in Iraq and since he got hurt, the military sent him back to her. He is living with major problems now and we hope to get him back on his feet soon. However, I won't leave him. I know that in my heart, he needs the support and I have been that. I won't let him down. I love him too much for that. It has been a long time, but it is like a "renewed sense" to me.
 owynsmom
Joined: 11/30/2007
Msg: 279
Would u date or marry a guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/5/2008 8:26:27 PM
Yes, I would. I have met alot of really awesome Military men, Most of which I've had the opportunity to have in my family. My mom's twin sister is married to a very nice and loving man who's in the military, they've been posted to a few different places and they both love it, I think it was most difficult for the kids. I have a good friend who is married to another military man and they are really happy and he's a really good man.
A lot of the perception of stupid and jerky military men comes from the really stupid ones, You hear more of the bad shit that happens with anything as opposed to the good. Such is with every aspect of life. If I found my mate to be a guy in the military I wouldn't think twice about it. Being married to someone who protects our country and freedom is something to be proud of for sure. I would be totally proud to say my man was away fighting for our country (If I had one).
 WesternRose
Joined: 1/14/2008
Msg: 280
Would u date or marry a guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/5/2008 8:38:58 PM
Wow...this is an old Thread...kinda like me...lol.

okay...well I am older...and I have met two very lovely men in the Canadain Armed Forces...both single...divorced dads... one is a pilot, the other a naval captain...both very senior posts in their situation.

both very dynamic men who enjoy their careers and know what they want from life....and both looking to retire in the next 5-10 years and yes... I would marry either of them. I am not going to be there for the long haul for a 30 + year career and they both travel alot... they are now looking to settle down and are both looking for a companion.

No.. I don't think I would of even considered this when I was younger... not able to deal with the salary and the moving that a Grunt in the Forces has to deal with.....the pay is low and I don't think the life is very glamourous.
 satx78218
Joined: 10/30/2007
Msg: 281
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Would u date or marry a guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/5/2008 8:43:48 PM
Navy and Air Force careers can be cool and safe. Lots of class, lots of useful training, and lots of high tech stuff to play with.

Marines and Army, actives and reserves, the ground troops, are at risk of being screwed over like they are in Iraq now, over-extended, stop-loss orders, serial deployments in a totally bogus war. VN was another BS war the Marines and Army suffered in and accomplished nothing. Not there fault. The risk is not so much the military danger, for which the people deserve great respect for facing, but the danger of having total, lying politicians starting a bogus war and not knowing how to run and when to end a war.
 Tonyfromwmu00
Joined: 2/5/2008
Msg: 282
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/10/2008 9:05:31 AM
I was in the military for six years....I would strongly discourage it. Adultery and infidelity are a part of everyday life in the services....I've seen multiple ppl, cheat, get divorced or come home with STD's. Words of the wise...don't do it.
 sweetdaisy75
Joined: 9/4/2006
Msg: 283
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/10/2008 10:34:11 AM
When I love someone I'll follow them where ever they want to go. I think its so hard to find love sometimes it worth giving up a little here and there to be with him. Besides uniforms are hot. Who can say no to a guy that looks good in a uniform plus say " yes mam"? I know, I sure melt like butter and be happy about it.
 qriosity
Joined: 1/10/2008
Msg: 284
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/10/2008 9:12:10 PM
I would. And, infidelity, etc, just like civilians, it depends on the person/individual. If they are morally sound and you trust them/their character, military or otherwise, shouldn't change that. It's how well you know the person.
 spearheadfish
Joined: 12/29/2007
Msg: 285
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/10/2008 9:23:46 PM
I am sorry this happened to u sniper308 but pls don't put all of us ladies in that catagory as I would hope the ladies wouldn't all classify military men as womanizers simply because of one bad experience.Thanks to u guys and gals doing ur part to protect us.
 Lil Brooker
Joined: 12/29/2007
Msg: 286
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/10/2008 9:29:48 PM
No. I'm too left wing and have a few other problems with the lifestyle.
 qriosity
Joined: 1/10/2008
Msg: 287
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/10/2008 9:34:28 PM

No. I'm too left wing and have a few other problems with the lifestyle.


I am too, left wing, anti-war and all that. Very much so, but, after getting to know a really awsome person, in the military, and his answer for WHY he fights, even, say, if his morals don't support a war per se, was quite insightful, and made me respect him even further.
 mitchchan
Joined: 12/11/2007
Msg: 288
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/10/2008 9:51:48 PM
From my personal experience, long distance relationships are hard to sustain as it is and ALOT of hard work to maintain.

No, I wouldn't date a guy in the military only because of long seperation and of course, I'd be worried for my guy's well being. I prefer him to be close to home as possible.
 JimintheOC
Joined: 12/22/2007
Msg: 289
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Would u date or marry a guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/10/2008 10:16:13 PM
Feeling inadequate are you? Just for starters there is far more technology and jobs utilizing high tech equipment in the military today than ever before, including the Army and Marines. As far as one of them getting hurt or killed, you are actually safer in Iraq than on our highways here, where 40,000 people every year are killed and many more are severely injured. The vast majority of the people in the Army and Marines do not have front line jobs, and are support personnel for those that have front line jobs. The ratio of combat related fields and those that are support jobs are on the ratio of 15 to one. If the Navy and Air Force are so safe, tell that to the guys aboard the USS Cole or the Air Force guys in the Khobar Towers, and to the thousands of Navy and Air Force people receiving combat pay, flight pay, and other forms of danger pay all over the world.
 custis
Joined: 3/16/2005
Msg: 290
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/10/2008 10:47:17 PM
Just something for you to think about. My oldest son is a staff sergeant in the army and happily married. His last sign-up bonus was $22k in one lump sum. I make a pretty decent living, but after all the housing and food allowances and whatever, he makes about twice what I make. There are definitely worse lives than being in the military. If I was 18, I would sign up tomorrow.
 000firefighter
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 291
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/11/2008 1:44:00 PM
As far as the ex army dude saying no way, because of the infidelity in the Military. I have been in the Military for 28yrs and its no worse than the local boys going out of town to play hockey, baseball etc.. or hop in any local bar, a portion of the men are married and looking, I know for a fact that there are many married men from my area on this site, and speaking of this site well we all know of the married men issues on here. So lets not give the Military a bad rap, its some men in any occupation, are some that naive to believe it only happens in the military.
 sweetblonde19
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 292
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/11/2008 6:35:24 PM
I dated a marine for 2 years. I met him 2 weeks after he got injured in Iraq. His mom worked with my mom and I decided to write him while he was in the hospital. I was with him through 60+ surgeries and when he was medicated and telling me horrorific stories. The military brainwashes out men. Bobby was suppose to get medical discharge and be out for the rest of his life. In the 2 years of the marines telling him this, they gave him an office job processing death certificates for other marines. It messed him up and how he treated me. He had many opporutunities to come home and visit and chose not to for 6 months. Within these 6 months, he would eat an extra large pizza every day and drink a 12 pack. He gained 100 pounds and became a raging alcoholic and drug addict. The only way I would date another military man is if he is not suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome. This and the alcohol and his weight took a toll on our relationship.
 sugar8200
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 293
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/11/2008 6:52:15 PM
I dated a guy for a year before he was sent overseas, we did the whole ldr and it was hard but we managed it and i supported him while he was over there (emotionally & mentally). He was over there for 15 months and when he came back he was a completely different person, it made it more difficult than when he was physically gone. I didn't understand what he was going through and it made it very hard to talk to him and such. We ended up splitting 4 months after he got back, we are friends and hang out still, but he's not the same person who I met several years ago. I have several friends that are married to guys in the military and they absolutely love it, and I have others who hate it. I guess it just depends on your strength and patience to go through something like that imo.
 custis
Joined: 3/16/2005
Msg: 294
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/11/2008 6:58:47 PM
"he would eat an extra large pizza every day and drink a 12 pack. He gained 100 pounds and became a raging alcoholic and drug addict. The only way I would date another military man is if he is not suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome. This and the alcohol and his weight took a toll on our relationship. "

My oldest son has been in the army for almost ten years now. He has two children and a devoted wife whom he is very happy with. He met her while he was in the army. He rarely ever drinks and then it is only one beer or one mixed drink and he is done. His offwork hobby is buying old cars and turning them into cherried-out works of art and selling them. Yea, there are people with problems in the military, and there are people with problems working at McDonalds too.
 asphaltcowboy1982
Joined: 3/28/2008
Msg: 295
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/12/2008 7:27:37 PM
It does take a special breed of women to date or marry a militay person. The military is very demanding of not only the person who is in but his/her mate. Do not judge everybody by how he turned out. they are differant after they go to war but not all become like that. My dad was in Vietnam and was in an outfit that had a price on their heads preferbly dead because of what they were doing over there but he has never done drugs and does not drink.
 Spitfire1956
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 296
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/12/2008 9:24:36 PM
I was married to a military man..and yes, I would do it again in a heartbeat. When he was deployed..I would halp the other wives who wasn't as strong as I was or I would come up and help his parents, and go to my parents and stay. I was there for him in every aspect, and he was with me..we were one. When he came home I would be there to support him in anyway I could. When he was medically discharged due to his back..we refused to let it get us down. I made damn sure every base was covered while he was gone, made sure the bills were taken care of, sent him care packages all the time of things he needed or couldn't get there......but, I know we had a very special bond between us that no one could break.
 crazytimes1
Joined: 3/24/2008
Msg: 297
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/12/2008 11:26:51 PM
Does not take a special person. Does take a special person to do it, keep their legs closed when he is away and be supportive. The majority end very poorly indeed.

For a woman is probably going to be the reason I leave when I leave.
 CurvyDee
Joined: 1/8/2008
Msg: 298
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/13/2008 1:29:09 AM
Yes i would, absence makes the heart grow fonder and keeps things fresh...:) the uniforms are hot, theyre doing their bit for their country which is very admirable and they get to play with guns :) whats not to love?

:)
 justagrl070
Joined: 4/27/2007
Msg: 299
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/13/2008 5:42:10 AM
I would definitely date or marry a man in the military. To be honest would even be a preference for me. I grew up with my father in the military and he was away for extended periods of time. I have so much respect for the men and women that chose that profession and i guess for me I would feel honoured to be in a relationship with such a man. So... where do i find one!!!!
 grizzly_bear
Joined: 5/1/2005
Msg: 300
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/13/2008 8:43:02 AM
I spent 16 years in the forces, earned myself 4 masters degrees from universities all over canada, participated in virtually every campaign going during my tenure, decorated 7 times, numerous citations and awards, and to all of you ladies out there, although I can't speak for all guys, do yourselves a favor and don't do it. I served with thousands of troops and can count the guys on one hand who stayed true to their significant others and spouses, any guy who flames me for my comment here, is only pissed because I told the truth.
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