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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 8/17/2004 10:26:50 PM | | Oh no Arsenio, women should focus on a man's inner qualities of tenderness and their instinct for responsabiliy as a good prospect of a man. Guys with hot bods, muscles, full head of hair, and financially secure are a cinch of deal to close. If I happen have a sense of style too, all the better. | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 8/23/2004 8:04:49 AM | Its because women don't bother even to take a second look at the nice guys. There attracted to the arrogant jerk attitude. Its there own fault and they choose who there attracted to. Most women (note most) Are stuck up and care for nobody but themselves and always are quick to blame someone else.
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 8/26/2004 9:39:59 AM | | Newby is absolutley right. Any man who displays self-confidence is sure to get a lot more female attention. I met this guy one time, not all that terribly attractive, really didn't have all that much going for him (he was a bouncer too, but that doesn't really matter) but he could get any woman he wanted. We were sitting talking one time and he asked me why I thought he was so popular...I told him it was his confidence, the way he walked into a room as if he damn near owned the place, the way he looked at people, just the friendly, open way he smiled at people. And it wasn't just female attention he got, there was a lot of respect from the male crowd, too...no one would mess with him. It doesn't take much guys, just put ur shoulders back, and don't stand against the wall! When u go out, walk around, don't stay in one place too long. You'll be surprised at the number of people who will stop u to talk. And if a girl looks ur way, don't be shy! Go over and talk to her! Chances are she's too shy to come talk to u. Just walk over, say hi, don't sit unless she asks...that way ur not presuming anything....my God I'm long winded...anyway, that's my advice for y'all today! Enjoy! | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/3/2004 11:57:42 AM | | Well that explaines why my heart keeps getting stommped on. Thank-you, from here on in I am going to ignore those hard wired feelings and go after the nice guy. | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/23/2004 4:46:48 PM | | i know the sort man, I had a friend once and I'm told that the feelings I had were returned, but then her friend decided that a romantic involvement between us would get in the way of his good time so he decided to lie about me for his own benefit. No matter what I said I couldn't effectively deal with those lies, so she still hangs around with a fraud while I lost something that felt amazing. | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/25/2004 5:40:09 PM | Just wondering:
Are the single women attracted to the jerks?
Or
Are those women, who are attracted by jerks, doomed to become single?
I don't think this covers the problem completely, but it might be a factor as well.
Tom | |
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jimi77
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Joined: 7/13/2004
Msg: 60 | |
| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/25/2004 6:23:56 PM | it does seem that nice guys finishes last... even my ex's told me that as she was jumping up and down on my heart like a trampolean. don't matter, i am not changing me to suit her or any one that cant deal with it. I like to be nice to people and being a jerk just doest suit me.
If i got to be alone at least i can live with myself. I would like to state altough i am nice i am not a door mat and i make that clear. | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/25/2004 7:28:51 PM | I thought everyone knew the answer to this question, lemme explain this for everyone.
1. Girl goes out with asshole.
2. Girl gets crushed.
3. Girl does this again.
4. Girl goes out with nice guy.
5. Girl breaks nice guys heart turning him into an asshole.
6. Girl finds her partner.
Its a vicious cycle. I think god chats with every woman in heaven before they actually take thier body and to break at least one mans heart while she is down on earth completing the cycle of why nice guys finish last.
Theres also that shallow thing that girls think they dont have. Like girls want to date a hot looking guy that is usually a jerk but has a nice washboard stomach, good pecs, and a "yummy face". However what they dont realize is that half of them dont look good enough to even try to date them and they become the toy that the asshole plays with.
Yoda: Shallowness is the path to the darkside, hmmm yes! | |
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| why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/26/2004 7:33:54 PM | | Hi guys, you must remember that when it comes to dating she is in an F 16 and you have one shot with a BB gun, but you are packen a big C in your chamber: Challenge. | |
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| why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/26/2004 7:53:13 PM | | Ask any women to define "Challange" and you will usually get a blank stare at first then the almighty truth comes out. Some women use the word straight out, but do you know what she is talking about? Probably not because your ego is screaming so loudly that's all you CAN hear. Unless you play hard to get, hard to keep, keep your mouth shut, i.e. a mystery, you are going nowhere. You have to learn to say no, keep your hands to yourself and let her come to you, brother. When you go out, keep it light and funny, answser her question with humor, not how you haven't had a date in 2 years and act like and look like some dude that has been lost in the desert for a couple of weeks and just found water. Search your heart, firend and use that brain God has given you. You are not the first one to suffer these trials, get control of yourself. Look carefully at my picture, you should see the women I dump professional women who look like runway models. Do not fall in love with someone before they fall for you. At some point in your life you are going to have to get some steel in that wimpy spine of yours and play the man. Read the Admin essay until you have it memorized and give a speech to your beer dirinking buddies and then start liven' it. | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/26/2004 8:50:44 PM | Hi Ray38,
If a women likes you she will want to help you, she will not speak in code, she will be honest. When women use the term "nice" translate it "weak" and think about to whom you are talking. If she say she wants a nice guy, there is a reason for that. You have a fairly good grasp of relativism, you can take it from here. | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/27/2004 3:00:18 PM | | I almost got in a fight last night. As soon as I walked in the bar, this big guy was wanting to start trouble with me. He walked over and stood next to me at the bar about a foot taller and 100 lbs heavier than me, and said something offensive. I turned to him and growled, "I am tense enough as it is, you don't want to add to it." He went and sat down at the other end of the bar. A pretty lady I had seen in there before suddenly couldn't stop looking at me, I went to another bar, and I think she followed me. I saw her there, and she came up and said "Let's hope you don't have any trouble here!" We talked a little bit, but I have seen her with too many different guys. I guess she saw my aggressiveness as confidence. I have noticed I am much more aggressive now than I ever had been, a result of my wife abandoning me I am sure. I just hope I don't slip into being a jerk...but it might be better, certain a change for me. | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/27/2004 4:10:55 PM | | Velocity, I don't think that you are turning into a jerk. You were just reacting in a normal way...the whole fight or flight situation. The day you turn into a jerk...well, that'll be the day I decide to major in mathmatics at MIT or something crazy like that. | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 9/29/2004 4:50:34 PM | I personally dont give a sh*t about this arguement I dont bother trying to fit any mold any more I have seen "nice guys" get what they want and I have also went to see the "jerks" in the psyche ward of the hospital because of a nervouse break down . The assumption that jerks are bolder and stronger blah blah blah is a crock and the assumption that women only go for guys like that is in fact kinda insulting to a women (I think any way. Like they ALL have no brain ) . I think the best way to be is not nice or a jerk BUT YOURSELF and have the balls to stand up for who you are .
I personally believe their is a created mystic about this so people can write books and selll them to hapless lonley men whos only problem is they go after the wrong women and hence get shot down all the time.
Blair | |
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| RE: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 10/4/2004 6:45:51 PM | Ah, how discouraging it is to finally be aware of the fact that because I'm a nice, talented, intellectual, successful young man (not the most attractive person on the face of the earth, but I can't do much about that), I will probably be utterly lonely for the next 15 years.
Everywhere I look I see more of the same, that similarity being that I only have qualities that will serve me well if I manage to find a very long term relationship (which is what I really desire, flings are not my thing), not the qualities that women seem to be attracted to initially. Society is telling me that because I'm nice, I will indeed finish last in what I like to call "the human race."
The fact that women oft seem to be attracted to complete morons is becoming less and less puzzling all the time, especially with threads like these strewn accross the internet. Search Engines can't solve your problems, but they give you information when you want/need to know it, that's for sure. When I started to realize that women are attracted to jerks more than anything, I became quickly discouraged and felt that I would never be connected in that special way with someone I was attracted to on multiple levels. However, now that I understand my position a bit more, I take pride in the fact that hey, maybe by being myself I'll be able to root the potential weeds until I find the proverbial Rose that I'm truly searching for. If a bit of excitement is all a woman is looking for, well I may dissapoint, but I don't hate to dissapoint. I'll save myself for someone who is seasoned enough to know that a moment of pleasure is not the way, and who is searching for someone who can care for them and provide for them.
Yeah I know, it may never happen. I may be lonely for the rest of my life. But I refuse to change myself just so someone notices me, when all they'd be seeing is a facade. If I end up lonely in life, I can take comfort in the fact that I did not sacrifice my integrity, which is something no one should ever do. | |
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| why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 10/6/2004 10:53:56 PM | | Plain and simply.. single women are more often less confident about themselves than even they will admit to themselves, not to mention anyone else.. Jerks are full of confidence.. they are over flowing with who they are.. and the hunt is more important to them that the catch.. Jerks usually butter up to single women with everything they desire.. which are usually confidence building compliments, and attention, things that single women usually crave when they are sick of being single.. But as jerks usually do, after the hunt is over, and they are in a relationship..the revert back to being who they really are. Single men who aren't like this generally don't exude enough of their own self confidence to show a single women.. but its not all bad.. not all single women are like that, and after a few jerks, they come to their senses and realize what is truly important in a man and whats not. | |
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| why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 10/12/2004 10:18:22 PM | | Honestly don't generalize all single females, I am not single but I go for dominant males,but nice dominant males,not ***holes.:) | |
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| why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 10/13/2004 8:50:58 PM | | I appoligize for not being more specific. But in general, the majority of when who do go for the jerks are going for the reasons I stated above. As I have stated in other areas on this site, not everyone is the same, and there are exceptions to every rule. The questions posted here was why do women go for jerks, so the generalization was already stated, I merely answered the question. | |
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| why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 10/14/2004 9:36:12 PM | YA IT IS A STUPID GAME WE HUMANS PLAY
ALL THESE CONTRADITIONS
ie like the book "the rules" for woman dating
IT IS ALL A GAME
I AM VERY STRONG NATURALLY ...............NO, I AM NOT TRING TO BRAG
MY MOM WAS VERY CONTROLLING AND IF A WOMAN IS TRING TO CONTROL ME ............NOPE
NOT GOING TO HAPPEN
DOES NOT MAKE ME A JERK THOUGH | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 10/14/2004 9:39:35 PM | @YOUNG BUCK
DUDE YOU GOT TO CHANGE YOUR PHOTO ON THE THREAD...............
IT IS A SMALL PIC AND IT LOOKS LIKE
A SIDE VIEW OF A NAKED GUY..............AND, YOUR HEAD IS COMING OUT WHERE HIS PENIS SHOULD BE..................
CHECK IT OUT A COUPLE THREADS ABOVE ME...........I AM TRING TO HELP NOT TRING TO BE MEAN | |
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| Re: why single women are attracted to jerks
Posted: 4/7/2006 4:35:45 AM | wow, admin I felt chills up and down reading that. The last experience I had fits the description so perfectly. It was as if he had some neanderthal mix in him. It was awesome but I don't think I would want to subject myself to that ever again. 
WOMEN ARE COMPLETELY CONTROLLED BY THIS ANCIENT MATING INSTINCT. Therefore, they have NO OTHER CHOICE but to go after ANY strong, dominant, untamable male. Or any male who can make her FEEL all those intense, uncontrollable feelings she lives for. The key to understanding women's strange behavior is "they have NO OTHER CHOICE" but to fall for these type of males.
And the jerk HAPPENS to be THAT TYPE of male. Or at least, the jerk has learned HOW TO PLAY that role. The nice guy IS NOT that type of male. The nice guy cannot even play that role. If a nice guy became strong and dominant and HARD TO GET, she will go BLINDLY after that nice guy. The proof that I am right is that EVERY TIME a nice guy starts ACTING like a jerk, HE IS SUDDENLY WANTED BY ALL THOSE WOMEN WHO USED TO IGNORE HIM BEFORE. Women don't really want jerks. They probably want a nice guy. But ... "what women -WANT" and "what women NEED" are two different things. And their Subconscious ''genetic" programming, that NEED to feel and feel and feel, will make women go uncontrollably after what they NEED, not what they want. And that is true of EVERY person, in any area of life. They will attract into their lives and/or will go toward what they subconsciously NEED, not what they think they want.
What a woman genetically NEEDS is the type of man who will trigger in her all those intense feelings and emotions. Why?. Because a female NEEDS to experience those uncontrollable feelings/emotions to surrender completely to him. Once she FEELS that way about him she will do anything and everything for/with him. Women are SUCKERS for those very intense emotions and feelings that they were "genetically" programmed to experience for a certain type of male, the dominant, strong one. They NEED to FEEL those feelings to surrender to him. It has a lot to do with Estrogen, the "feeling" hormone as opposed to testosterone, the "performance/achievement" hormone. While most men are born to be "doers" most females are "be-ers" or "feelers".
Women will love and go after ANY man who is able to "ignite" those feelings in them. Unfortunately, a "nice", sensitive, wimpy type of guy does not generate those feelings in women. A strong, dominant, hard-to-get! man DOES. And the jerk fits in this category. And the jerk knows how to "ignite" those intense feelings and emotions women are addicted to. A jerk and a hard-to-get man make her feel ... feel...feel ... crazy, excited, turned on. A "nice" guy makes her feel ... feel ... feel .... bored to death.
Even when women fall for a guy who is very handsome, they will leave him very quickly if they discover he is a nice guy who can be easily controlled by females. It happens all the time. And they will go after some not-so-handsome type, even ugly one, who is strong and dominant. Even married women will do the craziest things and go after THE guy who can "ignite" those feelings in them. What she loves are the feelings she FEELS. Not the guy! But in her mind, the guy and the feelings become inseparable. She loves the feelings. Therefore, she falls in love with the guy who can make her feel that way.
Now, it will be totally futile to try to explain to any woman that she doesn't really love guy A. But that she really loves THE WAY guy A makes her feel. She will tell you that you are crazy. But this is the truth. In a nutshell: Person A loves person B because of the way person B makes person A feel. More precisely, Person B satisfies the deepest VALUES that Person A needs satisfied to believe/know that she is in love with Person B.
Women were "genetically" programmed to be SUCKERS for intense feelings and emotions in order to surrender and mate.
The jerks and the hard-to-get guys DO "trigger" those intense, uncontrollable emotions she "genetically" loves. A nice guy does NOT.
ANY man who learns HOW to make her FEEL the way she was "genetically" programmed to FEEL, FEEL AND FEEL, will have her doing anything and everything he wants.
Remember that men are "doers". Women love feelings. They live to FEEL, FEEL AND FEEL.
If YOU can make her FEEL the way she wants to feel, she will LINK all those pleasurable, intense feelings with/to you. YOU will be satisfying her deepest, most treasured VALUES. Then, she will become ADDICTED to you. And you will make her fall in love with you.
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