HB2
| | Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 26 | |
| | Is it necessary to have common interests?Page 2 of 4 (1, 2, 3, 4) | I totally agree with that^^^^^
All I'm saying is that couples don't need to do everything together.
Yes, I'm willing to try a new activity and would hope my partner felt the same but it's not a requirement. | |
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arri
| | Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 27 | |
| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 10/16/2005 1:07:47 PM | | There are also a lot of lifestyle and couples things like the entertainment that you better both enjoy besides sex, or the relationship will be very boring. | |
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HB2
| | Joined: 5/11/2005
Msg: 28 | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 10/16/2005 1:17:09 PM | | I think common values are much more important than common interests. However if a guy is into an expensive and/or time consuming hobby like flying or SCUBA and the girl is not. She will eventurally be unhappy about the amount of time and in a long-term relationship, money, that he spends on his hobby. Diverse interests can be fun as long as one partner is not really against any of them. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 10/16/2005 1:17:16 PM | I never thought I'd want to be with someone all the time.. (That's for sure)
I dated someone that just always seemed to be around... I'd say I was going to the grocery store and he'd come with me... (it didn't bother me... we actually had fun shopping together!)
We'd go biking... walking... tubing down the river... If he wanted to run I'd tell him to go ahead and just catch me on his way back while I walked.... We'd go on a walk and I'd pull out a frizbee.... or pull over to play catch with a softball at a park...
He was really into computers... and I'm not..... so I just did other stuff while he did that....
dayum.. I kind of miss it! | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 10/16/2005 5:09:50 PM | | Yeah, I would want a girl who is interested in at least some of the stuff I'm into. Hopefully I'm also interested in some of the stuff she's into. I would think common interests are a major ingredient in the glue that bonds two people together. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 10/16/2005 5:11:48 PM | | I think it's more a question of how much TIME is spent on the interests. If it's a casual hobby or something you spend nearly all your free time on. I think it's good to have some interests common and some different. Makes for a good mix. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 10/16/2005 5:38:35 PM | | I introduced the guy I'm seeing to the world of Horsedom the other day. If I can get him hooked on that, then we're good as gold woohoo!! | |
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ksue44
| | Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 34 | |
| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 10/16/2005 6:57:59 PM | | Some similar interests but I'm not seeking my siamese twin. It's more about relating than just dating for me. A strong couple is one who grows together, they may not share the same views, but they will have great tolerance and respect for the other's opinions as well as interests. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 10/16/2005 11:21:02 PM | Very similar core values, a good compliment of interests as well as knowing the interests of the other are ones you can live with.
Some hobbies are so time and expense intensive they really do require that has the same kind of interests in those areas. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 8:45:42 AM | | Some. I do not want someone who has EVERYTHING in common with me. To me, that would be a bore and the idea of dating myself or a clone of myself is not appealing. I am attracted to someone with some common interests/ideas/values, etc..and some different. I am often attracted to very opposites but have never persued because I know the rejection rate in that type of search is quite high. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 9:40:50 AM | Common interests are very important. I like religion and could never enjoy time with an atheist and he would not like going to church or temple with me, so our core values would be way different and incompatable.
I like to eat healthy and do not like the smell of junk food eaters who do not take care of their health with good diet, exercise and clean lifestyle, no sti's. So it would be impossible for me to want to be close to someone who ate a junk food diet and did not eat right, exercise or pay attention to their diet and lifestyle.
Pipe or cigarette smoke bothers some people, not me, as my dad smoked, so I am okay with cigarette, pipe or cigar smoker, and that would bother other people.
Some people are okay with alcohol, I never drink alcohol, never touch the stuff, so a drinker would be incompatable with me.
I like to swim and sun and it would be unusual for me to meet a guy who did not like to swim or sun.
If you are physically attracted, share similar values, interests and beliefs, if you both like reading the same books, and enjoy the same lifestyle, then you have a lot in common and that is good to share common interests, values and beliefs etc. as kindred spirits and compatable partners. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 9:56:44 AM | I look for common interests to a point, but my lifestyle seems to change depending on who I'm in a relationship with at the time, so different interests work as well.
I DO pay attention to different interests when they are something that I'm just not in to. For example, I'm not a dancer.... so when a guy posts in the first line of his profile (or the first date) that he "loves to dance", that tells me we won't be a match. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 10:00:32 AM | Opposites attract sttract sometimes but more often than not they don't which is why it is good to have at least a few of the same interests.
If you both have the same interests then you'll both be bored and the relationship won't last very long. The key is to find the balance. For you both to have some similar and same interests but at the same time to have different interests that would intrigue one another. | |
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csod64
| | Joined: 6/21/2007
Msg: 40 | |
| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 10:20:58 AM | | It depends on what you're looking for exactly. If it's for LT, then you better have lots in common--or an ability to appreciate your differences without being judgmental. Now, if it's just for an "Intimate Encounter", perhaps the less you know about the other person the better--except know that you're both wanting the same thing...sex. (Then you should at least be attracted to each other. At the very least.) | |
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EyeDye
| | Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 41 | |
| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 10:21:44 AM | | Sometimes having a partner that is very different from you, can compliment each other in many positive ways. However, I feel you must have at least SOME things in common, or you are likely to not enjoy each others time quite as much. In a relationship its good to enjoy doing some things together. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 10:51:07 AM | | i wouldn't want or choose someone who was a carbon-copy of myself, my interests, and my habits. it seems healthy to have some differences...having passtimes and interests that allow us to bond and socialize outside our romantic attachments. there are couples who seem to feel a need to be joined at the hip and share everything, all the time...i find that to be a rather claustrophobic way of relating. a bit of space, a bit of independence, and a mutual respect for difference seems a far more grounded approach. i want my partner to be free to express himself, even if it's not an interest i share. i'd rather be in a relationship with a man who has friendships and social circles beyond our shared scope, than someone who feels the need to make me the center of his world. while that type of adoration is flattering, it's not entirely healthy. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 12:15:45 PM | Common interests? Well, as long as she isn't into girls, too.
Now wait a sec, that might not be such a bad interest to share after all... | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 12:48:07 PM | It's easier to find someone if you have shared interests.
It's also easier to get on with someone if you have something to share.
But I'd give it a shot either way. I LOVE to learn new things. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 1:22:46 PM | Having common interests does not mean that you share all interests or that you never spend time apart, it just means that you have some common interests. A common interest can be one you share now, or one you develope while getting to know them, but for me it has to be there in one form or another.
I've tried dating those that I've had little in common with and it hasn't worked. I found their company boring and unfilfilling, even when they were genuine, kind, intelligent, and beautiful. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 6:09:26 PM | | I think it is a must to have some common interests. The relationship will be stronger if you enjoy the same things. It also will be fun creating new common interests as the relationship grows. Having fun and enjoying life together is what I think love is all about. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 8:35:06 PM | Searching for a match with some on who shares some of your interest yes I think is important, you need to have a base to start and interest vs. looks is a great place to begin, give you something to open communications and communication is very important in any relationship.
Now when you find that you enjoy each other than you can explore and learn together new things to keep the chemistry alive in your relationship should one grow whether you stay only friends or you become something more. so yes searching for that interest is important. I find that compatibilitu/interest #1 and then personality #2 and then I move on to the looks.
Just my opinion! | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/20/2007 8:42:42 PM | | I agree its a major ingredient and so is giving each other space to do do there own thing, all interest and hobbies do not need to be shared together that's when respecting each others space comes in. Sometimes letting some one do something with out you give the other a reason to come back and share with you what they did again opening doors for communication another important ingredient. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/21/2007 6:55:07 PM | Well...it can't hurt, can it. Seriously, it does give you both something to do and something to talk about. The shared experiences, shared lives thing.
It also depends on the interests. Some people flip over politics, others the environment. Whatever. It is even better if instead of shared interests, they are shared passions. You get exited over something, then I get exited over something. So commonality helps cement a relationship. But is it absolutely necessary?? I don't know.
I think it is also important to have some separate interests. This gives different outlets, different acquantances, and just as importantly time apart. Hope that doesn't sound odd, but interests apart help define ourselves. If, in doing these things we feel good about ourselves, then this is transmitted to people in our everyday lives. After all, most people I know like people who feel good about themselves. | |
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| Is it necessary to have common interests?
Posted: 7/21/2007 7:14:17 PM | I don't necessarily look for common interests, rather focusing more on compatible values. But, I have a wide range of interests so that isn't a big issue for me. I love to learn and try new things - almost adventurous that way. Keeps things interesting.
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