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tazgal
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Joined: 1/18/2006
Msg: 27 | |
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tazgal
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Joined: 1/18/2006
Msg: 28 | |
| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 3:51:49 AM | | The 18 year old that buzzed me last night tried to use the 'are you scared' tactic on me. That's just a ploy to dare you to give it a shot. However, he might be smarter than I think because he said it all with his reason for buzzing me, "I've got the stamina and you've got the experience", lol, so I guess it boils down to what each person on here is really looking for in life. | |
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*Tee*
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Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 30 | |
| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 4:11:29 AM | | I'll date men up to 10 years younger then me, but thats my limit. I can only speak for myself, but in my experience, the men I've met in their 20's don't seem to have the maturity I look for.... | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 4:54:29 AM | It has nothing to do with fear or being scared - it has everything to do with having a mutual foundation based on similarities. The old saying "birds of a feather flock together" still holds true - we tend to be attracted to people who share a similarity and age is just one more of those similarities that makes communication and mutual understanding that much easier.
Men from my own decade grew up in the same generation as me - they have different mannerisms and ettiquette that I seek in a partner. We share a similar point of reference which makes communications easier. In general I find it is easier to find that well balanced, mature, gentleman who is financially independant (meaning self-sufficient so I don't have to pay for him), self-confident, responsible and experieced in life if he is over 40. Besides I find men in their 40's incredibly sexy - the years seem to ad to their appeal for me.
There is certainly nothing wrong with younger men - they can be quite the eye candy and I've met many who were quite intelligent and mature for their age but I have very little in common with them when it comes to life experiences. I am at a different stage in my life than most 20 something men... they are just reaching the years of settling down and possibly raising a family... I would never want to deprive them of experiencing that whole decade of life in order to be where I am in life - I am at the end of raising my family (my kids are teenagers) and I am looking forward to leaving the nest and exploring the next phase of life - including retirement in another decade.
Women aren't afraid of dating younger men - and there are a few who really enjoy it - but for women who are seeking longterm potential there is no sense starting something that you know in the end could be detrimental to your potential partners well being. It's so much easier to just spare the heart ache and not go there if you know it wont work - and for me it wont work. What I seek a 20 year old cannot give me.
Kay | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 5:22:11 AM | | Ditto for me Kay. I actually prefer younger men, but when I say younger I am referring to 4 or 5 years younger and not 20 or 30. At this point in my life I would like someone who is going to be around a bit and someone who I can have great conversations with and I just can't imagine what, besides sex, I could have in common with a 30 year old. | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 6:38:34 AM | | Women are scared of dating those younger? Wow, it's my preference. There are limits of course, but my last long-term relationship was with someone 10 years younger. That seems to be the low end of my scale, but dating someone my age or older just doesn't seem to fit me. | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 6:44:03 AM | I have almost always dated younger men.........I dated someone 7 years younger than me for 6 months. Although I didn't know how old he was for the first month, (he looked older and acted older). It was the best relationship I've had. He moved away as he got his dream job and I was not ready to move. But we talk all the time still and have remained really great friends.
To me age is just a number. Although I do have a hard time dating someone to much older than myself....interesting......hmmmmmmmmmmmm | |
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Xavi
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Joined: 1/6/2006
Msg: 35 | |
| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 4:10:03 PM | If they are mentally mature enough, fine, but as one other poster said, I don't want to be a babysitter. I have no desire to raise someone else's son, thanks!
I've dated guys who were half my age and very mature, and guys who were older than I am and had never "grown up" mentally. If he makes sure his bills are cleared off before he buys something that is a luxury, great. If he spends more on X-Box games than anything else, I am not interested. (Same goes if his car stereo cost him more than his car did.) | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 5:41:15 PM | | I think its more the stigma from their families. My mom went on a date with a guy that was my age and I'll never let her forget it. I think it was just ridiculous for her to date someone that could be her kid. To each their own I guess tho | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 6:16:47 PM | I know the topic is older women dating younger men, but you have to realize that when we date there's always the possibility of falling in love with someone and wanting a relationship.
I don't believe it has as much to do with age as it has to do with where people are at in their lives. For instance many guys who are only in their early to mid 30's still look forward to getting married and having children. And most women who are in their later 30's to early 40's have already been there. Yes, she may be interested in marrying again, but not usually interested in having more children, or might be unable to. Ok, if this women starts dating this younger guy, what happens if she falls in love with him. Well, eventually she will get left behind for a younger women who can give this man the family that he desires.
The only way this could actually work, is if the younger guy somehow started out young, and already has children. Or the younger guy just has no desire to have children.
That's really where I think the big issue is with older women and younger men. | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 6:34:16 PM | I'm in my 40's and I couldn't imagine dating a woman in her 50's...I just think there is a generation gap there, no offense. Although I'm sure there are some young-at-heart souls like myself floating around. But no, I don't get the sense that women are scared of dating younger guys. I get mail all the time from them.  | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/18/2006 8:04:51 PM | Like many of us older woman on here I get emails from guys in their 20's & 30's telling me they can satisfy me better then guys my own age...right there tells me there's a mentality gap...one claims he has more energy then older men..hey I'm sure he does...some of the things can be pretty funny...but in reality this could never happen in my lifetime...I'm not scared at all...I can't imagine being with someone my children's ages... I really don't date guys my own age simply because they are old looking...maybe it's me but I find guys in there 40's much more attractive.... it seems the older men get the less vain the older they become...with their looks that is...and Please guys don't send me hate mail...this is only my opinion from my experience...I've dated a guy on and off for the last 2yrs who is 10yrs younger then me he's extremely handsome..intelligent and successful...I wouldn't think of marrying him because of his age and his lifestyle (that's another story for another forum) but I will continue to date him...I don't have a problem with that...he's fun to be with and we get along well....as for dating really young guys in their 20's...NO... | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/30/2006 6:17:07 PM | I don't think age should be a factor providing its still legal..lol..It's all about if you have good chemistry together. after all you are only as old as you feel. I'm feelin pretty damn young these days.  | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/30/2006 6:32:08 PM | I am not scared...the majority of guys that I have dated have been younger by at least 7 years or more. And they are the ones hitting on me ! Most guys my age can't keep up with me, anyway.  | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/30/2006 6:43:00 PM | | It's not that older women are afraid of dating younger guys. There is only so much you can do together. At some point either she has to act younger to fit in with his scene or he will have to conform and try to adjust to her scene. When you get to the point where you can't just be yourself, maybe the relationship isn't quite what you want it to be. Remember you aren't an island unto yourselves. Will she want to hang out with his friends all the time? How will his friends really feel and visa versa for him...its something to think about.. | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/30/2006 7:19:26 PM | | I don't have a problem dating younger. And like many have been saying...age is just a number. Who knows who their perfect match is? If there is chemistry there and you're both looking for the same thing, then it's a relationship worth pursuing. But I will add, I'm not looking for a boy toy. So yes, to some degree, I won't date someone young enough to be my son. | |
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| Why are older women scared about dating younger men?
Posted: 4/30/2006 7:28:33 PM | | i have no problem dating younger, my last longterm bf was 7 1/2 years younger than me...and most men i go out with are a fair bit younger than me as well. i actually find that more often it's the younger guy who says that he likes having an older woman for fun, but won't consider anything a bit more emotionally involved with her. | |
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