| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/20/2005 5:02:56 PM |
I see some women on here saying that the reason they would ask how much a guy makes is because they don't want to have to support him later. But at the same time this may also tell the guy that she is looking for a free ride. Personally, I have never been asked this question and if asked I would tell her it was none of her business. She can ask about my job etc but my bank account and assets are noone's business but mine. Anyway, if a woman can't recognise whether a person is capable of supporting a good family after a few dates, she isn't overly perceptive.
ok i know this was in reference to my reply, i ask what my date does for a living because im interested in him and his life, i dont see how me saying i dont want to look after some slop its interpretted into my wanting a free ride, cuz you know, im getting in a great job and i can only advance from here and retire early in life so, which leads me to the next thing you said that was bothersome, perceptivness. if some dude didnt know everything i just pointed out, after a few dates then HE wasnt very perceptive either.
and i dont want to be looking after anyone, men can be gold diggers too and some of us women gotta look after our money, goes both ways! | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 52 | |
| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/20/2005 5:38:43 PM | ^^^ I hear ya ???????????????? and also one thing where guys and women tell a bit too much in their profile in hopes of getting responces from lots of women.
I state I have my own business cause it takes up a lot of my time, and I need an understanding women who can accept it. Not the fact I make $2000-$6,000 week.
I remember one girl messaged me once and she was happy to see how I owned my own business, and after a few emails concerning business pratices she wanted to meet me right off the bat. After I asked her why she wanted to meet so soon, she stated " looks like your set in life finacially and that is what I am looking for in a man"
That is when the strike was still on with the NHL and told her that well even being set I am still take a big hit with no hockey - never heard from her again lol
Doesn't matter if I make $100 or 10,000 in a week, it's a business I have to spend money to make money. | |
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| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/20/2005 7:09:32 PM |
evolution bla bla bla
care to elaborate???
Women don't "need" men to take care of them anymore, not in the western world anyway. It's acceptable for women to work now, Leave it to Beaver is passe.
i think that men need women and women need men no matter what society/culture/time period. like you cited, in the united states the leav to beav era did find many families emplying a men work and make money while women take care of kids cook type of philosopy. that proved to work as we are still thriving. for various reasons our culture has gotten away from that ideaology at least in part.
sometimes it can be difficult to buck the trends of society and go aganst what our peers, colleauges and contomporaries think, however, i do it all the time and the biggest problem is the cost of paving your own road. if you are resourceful and original enough you can use many differnt strategies to raise a child. single dads, single moms, divorces, mother and fathers it all has potential to work although some paths might be easier.
women still need men and men still need women. women never needed men to "take care of them".
I won't ask a man I'm dating how much he's worth or what his salary is but, I will try and find out if he's in debt! Sorry but I just don't go for irresponsible.
really i thought you loved irresponsible. thanks for the heads up on that. being in debt doesnt necessaryly mean you are irresponsible. i know quite a few students in serious debt and they are not exaclty the irresponsible type. there is probably a correlation though, but i suggest you look a lil further before you walk on that. | |
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| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/21/2005 9:07:08 AM | Do you work??? At my age!!! (not that I am old) but you had better have a job. Def. potential to have one.
Do you drive??? I dont want to have to cart someone around. LOL! JOking. (kinda)
Do you live on your own??? again to the above. I dont care if you rent or own. But if you are still holding Mommy's hand... than you dont need mine.
Where do you shop??? HMMMM??? Never asked that one. Can tell by seeing what you wear.
How often do you afford to go out??? That is just a dumb question. Just say it to yourself a couple of times... It sounds Dumb.
How often do you go out???? I ask that too. I want to know if he likes hanging out at the bar all the time or not. | |
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| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/21/2005 10:49:34 AM | I really appreciated that someone mentioned that men have a tendency to ask innapropriate questions like body measurements, and sexual preferences...talk about hedging your bets!!! I guess it does amount to something biological...yes it is frustrating, but doubt its as black and white as you put it.
The questions...
do you work? Being an ADULT generally requires that you have some sort of activity that helps you pay the bills (job), or an activity that will help you pay the bills in the future (student). Its something most of us do, so why should it be considered rude to ask about it? Its definitely a good conversation starter...talking about how you ended up where you are in your career, its a good way to get to know someone. I pretty much always wnat to know what the other person does for a living, but I have to say, I have never asked inorder to ascertain whether they were financially well-off or not.
Actually...i'm a little afraid of the types that have lucrative jobs...i certainly don't fit under that category, and I would be worried that i wouldn't fit into their lives. I once dated a guy who showed me an expensive leather designer bag his ex gf had bought him for x-mas. And I thought....Geez, I can't compete with that! That not why it ended, but i remember feeling very intimidated in that moment.
I suppose if you were the suspicious-type, you could misconstrue the question as a probing of your financial status, but you should take it with a grain of salt...if there is a thread of questioning that you think is designed to get financial information out of you...thats one thing...but asking someone what they do for a living, can be very innocent, and simply a matter of finding out more about someone you think is interesting... | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 59 | |
| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/21/2005 11:10:06 AM | It's fine to ask the questions, but what I am really asking about is this -- If a guy say's he makes $9Cdn -- what are the chances your actually gonna talk to him ??
I know if I say I make $75,000/yr I will end up finding more women that like me, but also know that many people will only make like $20-$30,000 a year and they can't find anyone, to even talk to them cause they don't meet their income bracket.
Cause they don't make enough, to please a woman.
I dated one girl for a few years, and never told her where I worked, lived a normal lifestyle and never blew too much money as she never made it an issue, then one day we were talking about marriage and she blurted out a line like " well for me to marry you, your gonna have to be making at least $18-$22 an hour cause when we get married I don't want to work anymore.
Now I see that more and more now. You have to hit a woman's limit even to chat with her, these days.
I'm sure if I told a girl I worked at a A&P making $9/hr but in another 130 hours I get a raise to $9.35 she won't give me the time of day. | |
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| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/21/2005 11:22:58 AM | i can see what your getting at....and my answer to that would be....there are all kinds of people in this world...and some of them deserve one another...
If it makes you so uncomfortable...maybe its time you turned the tables on them. Make clear to your potential dates that you are looking for someone who is successful, and able to support themselves, and not looking for a sugar daddy. Otherwise, you'll just spend most of your time projecting and trying to read into what people are saying...then you aren't really getting to know a person...you'r just trying to sniff out their real or imagined "ulterior" motives.
I definitely agree that asking about someone's income is rude and tacky. But I also get uncomfortable around people who think that it should be top-secret...like someone is gonna come along and take them for all they have. Unless you give out your pin number...no one is going to seduce away your precious hard-earned dollars.
It sounds like you are bothered by the importance women put on money...but by being so concerned about it...its obvious that you place much importance on it too. | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 61 | |
| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/21/2005 11:29:50 AM | Actually no I don't
They ask, I say yes or no -- problem is when they start asking, so what exactly do you do.
When I say I own my own business, they automatically say " oh WOW, so you must have a big store"
Then I tell them it's home based, and they start asking personal stuff.
Normally I will refuse to answer them, so I never hear back again lol, no skin off my nose, but I see people talking about it and getting crushed and stuff.
I don't care if the girl blows me off as I am looking for someone who will look for the inner value of a person, not is what is on the outside or in his wallet
Problem explains why I have been single for a while | |
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| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/21/2005 11:47:07 AM | maybe the statement "i own my own business" is the problem. Can't you simply describe the principle activity of your business and leave it at that?
I guess its the same for me...lots of guys insist on asking about my measurements and sexual preferences. Most of the time I refuse to answer...sometimes I do, out of sheer indifference. Whether I answer or not, does not change the fact that I just lost respect for the other person...you're right its a turn off, because they are not trying to get to know me, they just want to fulfill some fantasy.
I don't find this type of questioning shocking or even deviant...its pretty common. I often have to remind myself that a lot of men really go for the instant gratification route...
Don't be so hard on us women...its been drilled in our heads that prince charming is coming on his white horse to save us from the big bad world. Even though I don't place much importance on money...i sometimes catch myself thinking that it would be nice if someone took care of me...but this is the real world! Just like I'm sure you might catch yourself fantasizing about some hot amazon breaking down your door to have her way with you! | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 63 | |
| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/21/2005 12:42:50 PM | I stopped thinking of an amazon woman saving me a long time ago.
I know I won't be saved, yet I will be viewed in someone's eyes as a savior, which unless I fall for, I won't save | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 65 | |
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| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/21/2005 1:33:34 PM | Shappy, I hope your business is a roaring and lucrative success!!! lol I suppose some woman gauge a man's true 'worth' (no pun intended) by the amount of money he earns and Personally I have never fit into that category because the last thing I would want a guy I am interested in to think is that I am after him for his money. I didn't grow up poor and I have been making it on my own for the past 20 years with the exception of my married years and I was then a 'stay at home' mom raising the kids. Chicks, broads, ladies, gals, (and other assorted terms that men usually apply to the female of the sex)who are looking for Mr. 'got rocks' probably get what they want in the end but unfortunately leave a bad taste in the mouth of the man they used and kissed off. This, in turn, creates guys with questions just like yours and cynics who really want love but carry the belief that all women are on the make. Well, I am the official spokesperson for good women everywhere who DO exist and could care less what is in your wallet but might be curious to know what's in your heart~ ..and about that 5 bucks.. | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 68 | |
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| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/21/2005 1:40:04 PM | hmmm, I've asked what a guy does before. never bothered me how much he makes. Or could make at that job. The more important question is does he like what he does.
I HAVE asked what kind of vehicle a guy drives. Because it'll tell me about their personality. BMW/Mercedes/Acura, etc don't get a positive reaction from me. Pickup trucks do, as do fuel efficient cars.
Do you live on your own. Not somethign I usually ask. I assume they do NOT live with their parents. Beyond that roommates aren't a bad thing.
Where do you shop... nope, never asked that. Never crossed my mind a guy has a specific place to shop. The men in my family never did.
How often can you afford to go out. Hmmmm nope, never asked that either. I know how often I can afford to go out. So that's what I do. If he can't join me, he can't join me. Life goes on. | |
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| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/25/2005 2:50:36 AM | Women have broughtthis bull on them selfs ,womens lib ,women wanting to out job men for selfish reasons women wanting to prove they are equal to men,So what .how your putting it on the man when men would just as soon have you home where you belong so you question lady is totaly adislike for men in general and a good way for you to stay a lesb..or a so caled womens rights activist more like womens liberation army who have sperm banks of the most desirable male hunks and test tube babys where if there not girl's you send them to the male testing site have fun and no I don't want to date you even if I was making the same money as you sir:  | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 72 | |
| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/25/2005 7:11:36 AM | I went out last night, stopped at a Timmies for a coffee and some lady jumps up in line, thinking she's all-mighty -- No one said anything but me, told her to get to the back of the line " ohh but I am in a rush " - I don't care, wait like everyone else ( someone let's out a "yesh" ) then she goes off on the counter person, saying " Do you know who I am, I want to talk to your manager" cause the counter person agreed with her going to the back of the line. She starts swearing and raising a rant as she had to wait as we all had too.
She was dressed nice, drove a BMW, has some gold on and looked like she deserved be to standing on a street corner.
For some odd reason I feel sorry for her husband, or many her hubby is just as bad. But this is a perfect example as after a while, some women out there believe they are too good for everyone. And the area that I live in, I wouldn't gloat about " Who I am " | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 74 | |
| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/25/2005 7:40:35 AM | That's right I used the word some, can't think just cause i am ragging on a topic about women that I think they are all the same.
I know each woman is different - I'm not that blind | |
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hb2
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Joined: 10/22/2005
Msg: 75 | |
| Why do women put dollar amounts on everything
Posted: 10/25/2005 7:53:29 AM | Posted By: shappy on 9/30/2005 6 23 PM
Subject: What's your addiction ???
"She was dressed nice, drove a BMW, has some gold on and looked like she deserved be to standing on a street corner. "
just your luck eh.. another hooker! | |
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