| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 11/15/2006 9:55:55 AM | This happened last night to me and a buddy in the bar. Women seem to respond to the loud, obnoxious playa types, and anyone can read the disdain in the faces of these men. It's entirely obvious that all they want is a peice of meat.
In contrast my buddy Chris treats women with genuine respect, and he gets brushed off as a loser and a wuss. And trust me Chris has accomplished enough in his life to be designated as successful. Is it because he's quiet and not pushy? Is it because he doesn't just grab a girl's a$s and orar out his mating call in a drunken stupor. And no these were not tenny boppers but women in their late 20's to late 40's. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 11/15/2006 6:52:11 PM | | well all i know is that i talk to a few girls on here and they say all the guys wanna do is talk about sex , so i tell them im not like that and that i look forward just to talking . but they end up going to the guys who want to just get off , go figure . | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 11/26/2006 7:45:15 PM | | Hello, I am a nice guy and would treat a lady with respect and kindness. I wish I lived near you to get to know you. I am who I am. Why would I change my personallity to someone I am not. I would not feel right about it. Thank you for your comment. | |
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toody
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Joined: 11/4/2006
Msg: 79 | |
| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/14/2006 6:48:55 PM | This is a very interesting answer and probably true for
those who have premarital sex. Wonder if you looking for
friendship then marriage then lover, in that order? | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/31/2006 8:48:43 PM | | Its funny reading through all of these responses. It sounds like everyone has there own idea of what "nice" is and how it is interrpruted. For every nice guy there is a nice girl out there. If you generally are a nice guy, you wont be able to change to find the "right" girl. Go with the flow my friend. Your positives will shine through to the right girl. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 1/17/2007 6:09:58 PM | nice guys don't finish last but guys who lack personal integrity or self esteem do. same with women as well...
me, i think kindness is the best aphrodisiac...
lar | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 3/2/2007 9:40:54 AM | | I am looking for a man that knows how to treat a woman.....I don't think there are any out there........ | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 3/6/2007 3:05:46 PM | According to an author on man / woman relations, David DeAngelo, nice guys finish last because they are perceived as always available, not a challenge to have, willing to wait out the time spent pursuing the jerks. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 3/22/2007 7:20:49 PM |
It seems that women do not appreciate a guy that treats her with respect.....why is that?
Would you actually want one of those women?
Believe me, as attractive as they might be...they're just chock full of issues, baggage, problems...and they will never make you happy in a relationship.
Don't be a doormat nice guy, but be a decent man. If women can't like you for being decent to them, then they deserve all the pain they bring on themselves. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 11/10/2008 3:11:03 PM | I hear that!
Last relationship I was in...I treated the girl like a Queen and ended up sent to the dungeon.
It seems like she had issues from previous relationships causing a wall to be built around her. Sort of a line of defense from being hurt again.
At one point I just started acting like I didn't care about her feelings. Amazingly, that's when she started opening up to me. But that is not my style. I cannot act like a jerk to gain a women's respect. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 11/11/2008 7:38:08 AM | | I have to agree with terri22 I too have heard many times your a nice guy, and then bye everyone wants what they can't have from kids to adults if you are to "easy" your no challenge and time to move on | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 11/13/2008 7:03:14 PM | | is a nice guy here...seems like the girls i meet they say im not their type or they wanna be just friends..which is true could always use some new friends but its like getting old out there granted im not the best lookin guy in the world but give us nice guys a chance...tired of meeting the girls that has drama too....anyways take care and good luck...ant | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 11/16/2008 9:25:13 PM | Well if she doesn't appreciate someone that shows respect I would wonder if she was a woman or a broad. A woman would be receptive to being treated with respect. A broad would just be interested in nothing but herself. Thats how they both roll. Good luck on which one you want. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 11/24/2008 2:26:13 PM | Being nice goes a long way in most cases. It seems nice girls finish last too. I am too nice according to everyone I have dated and all my friends and co workers. I am still single...
As far as nice guys, some of the ones I have dated have bored me by trying to protect me too much. I do like to get out and goof off. It doesnt have to be a date with dinner and a movie everytime. Stir it up a bit. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/1/2008 4:32:07 AM | I see this sort of post in various forums that I belong to. I've tried to help guys out and tell them exactly where they're going wrong and how they can correct it, but I always get told I'm full of shit. "Well, if you're so good, why are you on a dating site?" I guess "Because I choose to be single" isn't a good enough answer.
Anyway, I'll try one more time.
www.doubleyourdating.com
It's a site run by a guy named David deAngelo. And no, I am not affiliated with the site, nor do I get any sort of incentive to send people there. And yes, he WILL try to sell you his CDs and DvDs, but all you really have to do is sign up for the free e-newsletter. Changed my life.
There you go, horse. there's the water. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/2/2008 12:48:15 PM | I didn't read the whole forum...just thought I would add my two cents.
A a nice guy who usually finishes near the end of the pack, I know one of our biggest issues is we try soooo hard to be the nice guy, we sometimes come across as phony, as if we are a wolf in sheep's clothing.
We just need to be ourselves, stop being so scared of messing up and just be patient.
Also, there are a lot of nice women out there...unfortunately most nice guys will still ignore them because we have the same problem that the shallow women who ignore the nice guy have...we don't go by character and personality nearly enough. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/7/2008 6:46:19 PM | It's not that women don't like to be treated with respect....
an "overly nice-ness" just screams "i'm trying SO Hard to make you like me and make you SEE that I RESPECT YOU! I'll never treat you wrong, i'll always be there for you. I'll do your bidding. I really really want you and I'll do anything for you"
A man I was recently seeing had seen me out with a few of these "nice guys" prior to us "dating". The setting was usually a bar, and the nice guy was generally following me around clinging to me and everything I said. The man said to me after one such night, "so when do I get to be one of your little puppy dogs you lead around?"
Don't be a f*ing puppy dog.
Not attractive. At all. Can we say "desperation" can we say "lack of balls" can we say "OH MY GOD WOMEN LIKE A 'TAKE CHARGE KIND OF MAN"
I mean, there are boundaries, obviously you don't want to shove your stuff in some girl's face without asking permission....but I recently went on a date with this VERY sweet VERY nice guy....who...after several hours of a date that wasn't going too badly...asked me if I would be ok with him holding my hand.....
Women don't want a guy that's going to cry with them at the movies, they don't want a guy that's going to remember all their anneversaries and who wants to do nothing more than sit at her feet and massage them at her will. I don't know where the hell that kind of crap came from. If I went out with a guy and he cried during the movie (without good reason) you better believe I'd get off my ass and leave.
Women want a guy that's forceful, women want a guy that doesn't NEED her. Women want a MAN. (Like I said, that's not giving you permission to go around shoving your stuff where it isn't obviously welcome... but you sure as hell need to be on the offense here boys! | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/18/2008 6:01:04 PM | | I just got screwed out of a mortgage because I was a 'nice guy' to my ex. I thought more about the kids and her well being then mine and not force the sale of the house. I don't resent what I did. I would do it again. I'll make it work somehow, thats what real men do. SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO GIVE IT AWAY TO KEEP IT. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/20/2008 7:52:57 PM | DISENFRANCHISED MALE COMPLAINT DEPT:
Yes, sir...how can I help?
<div class="quote">It seems that women do not appreciate a guy that treats her with respect.....why is that?
Well Sir:
1. I think you mean "some" women.
2. Your complaint smacks of male entitlement.
You may be dependable, courteous, non-judgmental, buy flowers, brilliant conversationalist, open doors, pay for meals, etc. ....but that does not entitle you be "appreciated" and/or respected.
I suggest the next time you go to dinner wear a clean muscle tee shirt.....while at dinner, step away from the table....and do a set of one-arm pushups. | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/26/2008 4:58:29 PM | This is an interesting question! As a lady who does not like playa's, pretty boyz, or a****les, I can say that the nice guy does not finish last. Many guys say they are nice guys but some are just using that as a line. Other guys realize they are nice guys and then try to act like a jerk thinking they are going to get a woman. yeah, they will get a woman but not who they want. Real women do not like jerks, or abusive idiots, or anything of the sort.
I respect myself too much to put up with someone who isnt open, communicative, honest, and most thinks he doesnt derserve the best for himself!
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/29/2008 7:14:51 PM | Hi there alwayssmiling66...first things first...you are adorable...had to say it...
Now to your question...I genuinely feel and know that nice guys do not finish last.
I think that some men come on too nice at times and want to over please in order to get a woman to notice them or like them...not intentionally of course...but it seems to happen. This might be the problem...you get nervous and you over do...which for some women can be a bit suffocating, even scarey, especially when they might not have not been with someone for a while.
For most of us older women, we can usually see through the over doing and see the real man for what he is...a nice guy...a true, decent person...someone who will give us the respect we deserve...and let you know to turn it down just a little bit.
I speak for myself and many other intelligent women when I say "forget the bad boys" -who wants to play games, and who has the time...I am too old for that nonsesnse...let me see the real you...and if you are a genuine nice guy...then you are a winner in my book! | |
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| why do nice guys finish last?
Posted: 12/30/2008 6:47:12 AM | "Nice" guys do Not finish last! Sheesh
Interesting how these threads are started by Needy men who somehow think their passive (even whining) nature is somehow appealing to women.
There is a Huge difference between nice and needy. A Huge gap between Nice and incapable of expressing / communicating. Saying "yes dear" rather than having the courage or confidence to be genuine - Not nice.
I think it might be interesting if 'we' could preface these threads with the OP's definition of "nice".
I dated a man who thought he was "nice" because he Let me make the decisions! I thought he was weak because he was afraid to suggest anything "in case I didnt like it". Whimp. He "let" me decide what restaurant we went to, what frikkin road we drove down .. blahblahblah .. no backbone does Not equate to nice! It does equate to "not the type of MAN I want".
I want proof you have b a l l s Before you drop your drawers!  | |
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