| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 11/21/2005 8:26:57 PM |
Why dont you put a photo up?
Are you talking to me?
If I put one up, would you believe that it's me?
What ^is^ me, anyway? This is just a blank profile. Suppose I put a picture there, but no other information. What would that do? A little grid of colored, glowing pixels, claiming to be the image of ... nobody.
How do you even know that I am just one person? Anyone who knows the ID and password to that profile can be writing this.
What use do you have for a picture of me? Do you want to meet? I see you live in New York. Perhaps you noticed that my profile also says that I live in New York. But I actually don't. Sorry to disappoint you, honey. I'm truly not interested in meeting anyone from the Internet. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 11/21/2005 8:32:08 PM | same thing goes for us bigger girls......we have the same issues you do....
i have no problem with bigger guys, i would prefer some meat on their bones......more to love.....
i find the problem is (for me anyway) that a lot of bigger guys wont even go for the bigger girls....... | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 11/22/2005 1:12:12 PM | That is ture Cariss. And god knows I've been guilty of that....but there have been big girls that I did fancy...I think it's just that we all want to find the beautiful element in the other person. Whether it's in their personality, their eyes, face, humor, or they just appeal to you in a physical sense. Sometimes there is a limit on people's choice on "How fat is just too fat?"...would you date a guy (Or girl) that was morbidly obese...I mean tot he point where they could die if they bent over to tie their shoes?
I hate the fact that people always seem to think that fat people are meant to date each other...not so. I"ve seen the scrawniest looking dudes hang off of women that look like they could give a scrub brush a run for its money. And vice versa as well...
I see nothing wrong with dating big girls (usually they are the ones that are the most fun...wink wink), I'm a big guy and I've taken the brunt of all the awful school years. All the name calling, being picked on, and humilated by girls who thought it would be a kick to tease the fat guy and crush him emotionally.
What I can't believe is that it still goes on till this day in the adult years...pathetic. | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 104 | |
| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 11/22/2005 1:59:12 PM | | bigger girls still get more mail and are on more fav list than even thinner good looking guys. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 11/22/2005 2:57:53 PM |
bigger girls still get more mail and are on more fav list than even thinner good looking guys.
That's only because of guys who are sexually desperate.
You're thinking, boy, it's so easy for even these fat women on an online dating site! 'm a thinner, good-looking guy, yet can't get any response, whereas they can just pick any of these guys who are writing to them and go out and get laid!
Two problems with that line of 0thinking are: One, the fat chicks are here because they can't meet a man in real life. They are ignored. Two, the guys writing to them are desperate for sex and just want to use them.
You're assuming that if you were a fat chick, it would be easier because you could get what you want: sex. But if you were suddenly transformed into a fat chick, that would change what you want!!! You wouldn't just want to have sex.
If you were a fat chick who does just wants to have sex, you'd squeeze into a tight tanktop and miniskirt, and hit the clubs on Friday night. You wouldn't waste time online on some dating site. No, if you were a fat chick going into online dating sites, you'd be desperate for someone to ^love^ you.
So you see, it's easy for these fat chicks to get what most MEN want. Except they aren't men, and don't want that, they want something else, which ^is^ hard for them to get.
So it means nothing to be in favorite lists and get mails. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 11/22/2005 3:17:49 PM | | Dude you are so sad^^^ You apparently have nothing better to do than ridicule others. One day you will end up seeing the light and I hope for your sake it's not to late when you do. One day you will either be over weight or even disabled or one of many "imperfections" Then how will you cope? If I have learned anything in my 42 years it is that what goes around comes around and you cannot escape it. Good luck trying though. | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 107 | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 11/22/2005 4:00:35 PM | | Hey Jazzhomie what's wrong with being a fat chick who just wants to have sex? You're a fat skinny buff fit loser who just wants to have sex. Sex is a good thing, no matter what size you are. You seem to like to judge fat people though. Get off your soapbox will ya, you're boring me. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 11/22/2005 6:35:11 PM |
Hey Jazzhomie what's wrong with being a fat chick who just wants to have sex?
Is that a trick question? I'm thinking along the lines of "nothing". Did someone say something otherwise?
You're a fat skinny buff fit loser who just wants to have sex.
Close. I have what you might call sex fatigue. I just want good sex. For some people, it's some particular fetish. Or they experiment with this or that, looking for the next thrill. For me, it's about finding that nearly ideal partner with the specific traits that turn me on.
After a while, the novelty of a girl spreading her legs for you kind of wears off, know what I mean? Sex somehow becomes much easier to get, but you get picky. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 11/26/2005 5:43:11 AM | Just as an FYI some girls like bald heads, before my soulmate found me I went out with a number of men and let me tell you, bald heads are wonderfully kissable  | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/23/2006 3:38:35 PM | | This is my opinion.I't should not matter how big or small a person is.It's the person in whole inside and out that matters in life.Hell if you think they left or cheated on you in the first place, than they were just wasting there time with you as well as yours.In time you will meat someone that loves you for the person you are and if you feel the same way, than you have found true love. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/23/2006 8:18:21 PM | | Being a big guy myself, the only advice I can give is don't settle for a girl who is settling for you. It's hard to find someone who isn't just in a relationship with you and all the while they are unattracted to you because of the weight and they stay because they either don't want people to perceive them as shallow or they just think that they will somehow become attracted to you at some point. Hang in there, I'm sure there's hope for us yet. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/23/2006 11:11:12 PM | bbwmumma,
I don't totally agree with you here.
While beautiful isn't ONLY skin deep, there are other underlying factors at play here.
I personally don't date laaarge girls because, quite honestly, it has more to do with compatibility with my own values as a human being than it does with their *size*.
Please don't take this the wrong way, as we are all allowed to live our lives as we see fit... you yours, me mine, and everyone inbetween theirs...
However...
If someone is very large (bbw for instance), and I'm not talking medium average sizes (12-16ish)... but size 18s and up... I typically am not interested because there is a REASON that they are this large. This may hurt to hear, and you can put up a huge wall and not hear it... but men and women that are obese are this way for a reason... typically a lack of drive, a lack of motivation, a lack of desire for self improvement, etc.
This may be fine for them, and their life, and their values.
Myself? I'm always pushing myself in life, in my career, in my relationships. I want someone who is going to be equally as motivated in their drive, motivation, goals, career, etc.
No One starts out as a size 24. We all start out life as little baby boys and girls... it is up to each of us as to how we turn out. I am by no means a huge built muscle head guy... but I have enough self discipline and motivation to make sure that I at least keep the belt size one notch too big, not 10 notches too big.
However, I do have a personal trainer and am in the gym at LEAST 3 times a week. And it has more to do with keeping my energy level high, my thought process cleared, and my drive high than it does about looking good. Trust me, I'm no Vin Diesel. As a matter of fact... if you saw me in person, you might be surprised that I even work out... but I do.
I understand that genetics plays a HUGE role in our body type and appearance... however, it doesn't play THAT much of a role when you start talking about EXTREMES.
In a potential mate, I desire the same goals, dreams, and motivations as I have.
So, it's not just a matter of looking past the outside and only looking at the inside.
Usually, NOT ALWAYS, as I understand there are occassional medical reasons for some folks, but usually, the outside is a result of the beliefs and goals and motivations of the inside.
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/23/2006 11:41:37 PM | | i'm a bigger guy as well. yes there is hope...however the hope is limited unfortunately. i don't like saying it but its true. Both girls and guys are shallow and thats how the world runs. I aint saying every girl is, but a good chunk are. But keep faith, have some patience and things will go right...thats what i keep telling myself lol | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/24/2006 12:51:13 AM | Well, i am overweight and i am fine with it, i am only trying to lose weight for health reasons and if i had no health reasons, i would be perfectly content with being big.
I wouldn't care what a woman looked like, slim, thin, big, overweight, as long as she is happy with it herself, i would gladly help her out if she wanted it, but of course, all the slim women tell me (IF they reply) is the following: 'Get Thin first, then come back'
Once i get that type of reply, they will NEVER get a reply, even if i was magically born with Brad Pitts' body or whatever celeb you women find attractive. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/24/2006 4:05:52 AM | | hey Pianist 1971 I'm not takeing anything the wrong way as a matter of fact I am a size 12-14 and I am happy the way I am just a little belly Id like to loose from haveing children.And the bb stands for big breast lol. I just wanted to put my opinion on here. And yes people need the same values in life as well as being comfortable with each other.ttfn | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/24/2006 11:08:53 AM | I'm a fat admirer. I prefer HUSKY guys and I know other women who are like me. I love the comforting feeling of being held by a big gentle teddy bear. My husband who passed away in June 2003, was 6'5, 380 pounds and I loved every inch of him. We were together for 13 years. Don't think of yourself as being inferior in any way. You have everything to offer a nice girl, and if she can't see it, you don't want her.
Now if this is a situation where you yourself are unhappy with your weight, then your own mind will create a problem in any relationship because you don't like yourself. If that is the case then it wouldn't matter what girl you were with, you would eventually sabotage
your relationship and blame it on her. So think really clearly to yourself...who has a problem with your weight? is it the girls, or is it you?
If it is you, then do something about it. I did.
http://www.atkinsdietbulletinboard.com/ | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/24/2006 11:16:44 AM | Anyone....and I mean ANYONE...who looks at what is on the outside of person for their compatibility....???
Is one sorry looser.
I find myslef drawn to large people in general. In fact, I have a ahrd time trusting anyone who doesnt have fat on their body.
Keep the faith! Carry on and be yourself! You WILL find a person who will fall head over heels for you becuase of what is inside, and outside. And to those people who do judge? WHO NEEDS UM? | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/24/2006 11:30:52 AM |
i find the problem is (for me anyway) that a lot of bigger guys wont even go for the bigger girls
that is true..
I like big guys.. tall.. heavy set.. something about the thinner shorter guys just doesn't make me feel 'safe' for a lack of better words..
that being said.. i tend to attract shorter, very thin guys..
most big guys really don't want bigger gals.. but then again I guess it all boils down to choices we have. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/24/2006 5:37:55 PM | I have had the joy of being totally in love with two bald men in my life. Are you nuts? PLEASE try and understand it really is about who you are. And for you ladies out there reading this, it is true bald men are better in bed. They try harder.
As for the beginning of this thread and the point of this discussion, whether you are perfect physically or not, you looks do not make you happy. It is your personality and your caring and projection of that caring that will attract people. I can say this here because no one knows me and I do not have to worry about appearing big feeling, (trust me that is nice to be able to do, yes, attractive people have feelings too). Now I am older and can appreciate your side of it, but take this little bit of wisdom with you, do you really want a life partner that loves you for how you look? I have had the misfortune of having two of them and yes they were the two bald men. I wish they cold have been loved me for what I did, and gave. | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/24/2006 10:57:14 PM | As a large guy, I've often thought there was no hope either; in fact, I was certain that once I posted a pic of myself, I'd get NO messages from any women at all. But surprise, surprise: I DO get messages from women, who have taken the time to actually READ my profile and decide that I'm interesting, fun (or funny), intelligent, etc. This is an enormous confidence booster, and improves my self-image, which is always a good thing. And I have renewed hope that someday I'll find a woman with whom I can spend all my spare time. In the meantime, just getting out and meeting fellow Fishes is pretty fun too!
My point (finally) is this: I acknowledge that I'm heavy-set. However, it doesn't rule my life; I'm working on getting to a healthier size, but it isn't the focus of my everyday. The fat is only a part of me; it's not ME. I'm able to look past extra weight on women, and apparently there are women who are able to look past extra weight on guys. So the original poster (forgot your name, sorry!!) should keep his hopes up too; just be sure to look at everything realistically (not necessarily negatively!). | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 122 | |
| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/24/2006 11:37:26 PM | | see dude , big guys have less problems than small guys , you doing better than me , I get no mail , just 2 a year . | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/25/2006 8:37:51 AM | Yes there is hope for you large guys....its called "large women"! I am a BBW and I prefer big men. I am afraid I might hurt the little thin ones (has not happend yet and thank goodness they still keep trying) and a big guy makes me feel safe and sexy and great!
But.....thank goodness average and small guys like BBW's.....cause a LOT of big guys don't! | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/25/2006 8:59:07 AM | and there so much more to kiss and kiss
Jacklyn....
Will you marry me? No commitment... just for a week or two...  | |
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| is there no hope for large guys
Posted: 2/25/2006 9:07:12 AM | Hey Guys!
What ever happened to "it's what's on the inside that matters"? Personality should come first!
But for the record....I would much prefer a big man to a skinny one. | |
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