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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/19/2005 7:44:02 PM | linguatic
Sorry, I should have made myself clearer. I live in a city where the motto is "Newly Wed or Nearly Dead". Truly, I am not kidding - that is our motto. And of course, as women live longer than men (still), the men on Vancouver Island don't have to look too far for their next date. Lots of all ages to choose from, so if you can go younger, why not? | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/19/2005 7:52:12 PM | | i agree totally ive had the same happen with for one Calipeoplemeet the same was happening when i tried to contact them i never got a responce i maiuled them at least 15 times there is others also | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/19/2005 8:22:20 PM | | i think so and how would it detemined in the class if we are eligible as match.com only keeps winks in mailbox and i sur ei got some form russia,etc, espicially form yahoo. | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/19/2005 8:25:51 PM |
... When the odds are 5 to 1 in favour of available men to women, it is my experience that when men surf the ads, they set their paramenters for approximately 15 years younger than they are - so our postings are not even being surfed, seen, or responded to. ...
Not always true. I am 40, and although I will accept a younger, mid-20's, I do surf UP TO my own age. 5-years younger seems to be the average of the "most interesting ones" for me. I am certain that I'm not the only man who does.
Some say that women do have that "attractive age range" where before, one calls them girls, and after, one calls them grandma. However, that could also be "nature's way" of telling men that they're no longer suitable for having children. Harsh as it is, that's a fact of life. There are always exceptions - including but not limited to those who look younger than their age. | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/19/2005 8:51:49 PM | [Quote]It doesn't matter whether it is free or not. When people do not have the courtesy of replying, even saying no thanks, then it all seems like a scam.
This bothers me too. Note that in my profile (admin's, please don't censor this one reference), I actually tell people that I would rather have a "not interested" reply over silence - and almost practically threaten them with a follow-up message if they don't! That's both here, and unfortunately, my match profile too. To put it in the words of Jack Nickolson's character Col. Jesup from "A Few Good Men": "I want some ****ing courtesy." (Sorry about the language - but that's the quote.) Even with that, I find that the "not interested" response rate is only 2% at most (or 1 out of 50).
As I noted elsewhere when commenting on this topic of non-replying, I think that this is a societal problem. Few people have manners anymore. | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/19/2005 9:46:55 PM | | give it some time !! I have been here almost a year and I have met only 3 people in person I've met some online that are really just good people ....... then again... I have also had some bad experiences with IDIOTS, but most of the true nuts will reveal themselves in some way if you continue conversing online with them long enough. Don't be dissappointed with the slow response. I was suprised to find out that online romance moves in cycles just like it does in the real world. At times I will open my mail to find that I have Nothing ! for days! nothing ! Then suddenly for no apparant reason. I will have more than I have time to answer, for several more days ! Then just a suddenly as it appeared its gone again! Makes no sense my online picture is the same....... every day.... I have only changed a few words in my profile since day 1. | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 12:06:45 AM | uhm. why pay for sites when you can get them for free?
i never pay for sites. they are a total rip off. plus, i kinna like my money in MY pocket, not in someone elses pocket. *lol* | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 12:24:30 AM | I signed up for one of the pay sites BEFORE it was a paid site, back when it was free. I seem to have been kept on as some kind of "charter member" - so I've never paid for it, and I get hits all the time. I'm on a couple of free sites, and I get hits there too. (By the way, I like POF - made some good friends here.  )
Other than that, the solution's pretty simple for me: I do not use pay sites. Period. I have better things to do with my money.  | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 12:25:44 AM | absolutely! i went on a spree and joined six dating sites just for the hell of it and guess what all kinds of attention,winks etc...no replys,no emails,nothing to indicate a human presence on the other end at all,one of these sights things were really looking good 4,5 emails a day so i payed to become a member and BOOM! NOTHING AT ALL SINCE!there was another one that was just difficult to navigate so i said screw it since nothing was goin on anyway and wouldn't you know it 187,000,000,000,000,winks a day! i consider it a learning experience as i'm not the suing type!this particular site you can rejoin for a "free trial period" and guess what?thats right absolutely nothing all over again,so i quit again and 183,000,000,000 winks again...its laughable to me,but i really dont see how it could be legal? never mind that every dating site is "free" unless you actually want to use it,i don't see how that slimy,dishonest practice is legal either! my solution=turn it off,go outside for a walk,without us,they've got nothing! | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 1:12:00 AM | | I find the same thing on all of the sites, pay or not. I get emails, winks...whatever. If I am interested I respond back and then we chat, but almost never actually meet up....my guess, the guy has a girlfriend or wife and doesn't belong on the site period!!! No stopping cheaters, no matter how hard we try. The only people that constantly pursue me on any site are the one's that blatently don't meet my critera...ie. I ask for over 5'11" and they're 5' flat....or they are over 40....etc. etc. The guys I am interested in either flake after a couple of weak emails or disappear all together??? I could attach a list of guys who have done that on here, but won't...lol. Good luck everyone, it turns out the internet is just as bad as the bar scene... | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 1:17:46 AM | | Ha Ha...be careful what you ask for. I have sent several not interested responses to people...trying to be polite, even though they just couldn't read.. you see when a girl says nobody over 35, unless you look like Vin Diesel, chances are, she means it. What did I get in return for a polite, I'm sorry, but our age difference is too great (one of match's custom responses.....some idiot that says I'm no spring chicken myself...lol what a typical man response to rejection....I didn't ask you to dance, I said you look fat in those pants...men grow up, we get rejected too.) After that, I found it was easier, and more pleasant for me to simply ignore those who didn't read my profile or dating critera, and delete their messages, maybe that's what is happening to you. | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 3:09:52 AM | Funny...it DOES seem to be true, that there are more men on these sites, (paid or free) than women. This is completely contrary to the statistics of the general population, where, apparently, -depending on the state and city you live- the single woman to single man ratio is some places as high as 5:1. So, while it seems that in "real life" there are more women looking for men than there are men to go around, the dating sites are full of eligible, relationship/dating hungry bachelors.
Yet: once you actually meet them, the statistics are reversed again: most men want...yeah...how am I going to put it: SEX
Men, according to my own experience, and as posted on numerous other forum subjects, do not cancel their profile long after meeting girls, who are considering themselves to be in a relationship. Like I have mentioned at other postings, it seems, many are checking their mail boxes on the way to the wedding chappel, just to find out, if a Ms. Even Better has shown up by any chance.
I would also like to mention, that men are just as guilty of posting pictures or stating stats that are less than honest, than women are alleged. Note; athletic body type does not mean love handles and beer belly..if you state you have black hair, the question is not what color of hair you USED to have...and if you are separated from your spouse for less than six hours -and only beause she is at work- you really, really, should not be on POF, or any paid site either.
Women might rule the internet dating scene, but there are still more women than men, who seriously desire a COMMITTED relationship. My experience, on and off site is, that most men are just browsing around for fun. Perhaps, even with the membership prices, they actually finding it easier and cheaper to find sex, than if they had to DATE women...think about it, a movie for two, sans popcorn, costs more than a month membership on the dating sites.
As for answering all e-mails: I am TRYING to answer them all, I think it is common courtesy. I respect the fact, that even today, it is still the man whom, for the most part, has to make the first move, and it takes guts. However, -and I am not bragging- I get up to 20 e-mails a day. Just keeping track of them is becoming a part time, if not soon a full time job. If I wanted to "coffee date" all the "applicants" (pun intended) I would have to quit my day job.
I wish, there was a way of screening out the non-serious ones, so thatI would not waste my time and effort on them, and their e-mails and the time it takes to correspond would not take my time away from the ones, that are WORTH meeting.
So, after only a week of "fishing", I have to say: fughetabouthit!
Until further notice: I am here for Forums only. I have to take a week off work, so that I can meet all the candidates. | |
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jimb77
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Joined: 8/30/2005
Msg: 88 | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 6:23:00 AM | Leading online matchmaker sued for bogus dating scam
NEW YORK, United States (AFP) - Match.com, one of the top Internet dating websites, has been accused of hiring people as "date bait" to go out with some of their one million customers to encourage them to keep paying for the service.
A Los Angeles racketeering lawsuit said the lonely hearts website secretly recruited people to send enticing emails to its customers and to go out on dates with them as a way of getting them to keep up their 30 dollars monthly subscription.
The company's ringers, branded "date bait", went on as many as 100 dates a month -- three per day -- with Match.com customers, who use the site to search for boyfriends, girlfriends, and possible husbands and wives.
"Hiding behind Match.com's portrait of online success is a very big, very dirty secret ... Not everyone you meet and date through Match.com is just another Match.com member," said the lawsuit, filed in a Los Angeles court on November 10.
Kristin Kelly, a spokesperson for Match.com -- which has an estimated one million paid subscribers and 15 million members -- denied the charges, saying the lawsuit is "completely without merit" and would be "vigorously" challenged.
The lawsuit was filed by Matthew Evans, a Match.com customer who hopes it will draw support from enough other customers to turn into a much stronger class action suit.
Evan's lawyers said he went on several dates with an attractive woman named Autumn Marzec before she allegedly confessed that she was paid by the company to meet him.
Such ringers are given access to customers' emails to familiarize themselves with the customer, allowing them to feign interest and compatibility, the suit claimed.
"The paid Match.com employee then goes on a date with the subscriber, gives the deceptive appearance of having a lot in common with the subscriber ... with the intent of luring the subscriber into re-signing with Match.com," the suit alleges.
The suit charges as well that when a customer's subscription was expiring, Match.com produced fake responses to customers, suggesting another person had an interest in meeting them, in order to prod them to resubscribe.
The Los Angeles suit represented growing reports of disappointment among the tens of millions of customers of the online matchmaking industry, which is led by Yahoo! Personals, Match.com, and EHarmony.
The industry enjoyed an estimated 245 million dollars in turnover during the first half of 2005.
While the industry advertises its success stories -- customers who meet online and eventually get married -- some disappointments have raised questions of industry practices.
Earlier this year Californian James Hunt complained that for the nearly 3,000 dollars he paid to matchmaker Together Inc., he didn't receive the guaranteed nine introductions of "nearly compatible" women. The company disputed his claim.
In New York, the Great Expectations dating service was recently ordered by a judge to refund money to two women who said they never got any dates after paying up to 1,000 dollars for a six month subscription.
"I just wanted to go out for coffee and have nice conversations with a couple of people. Instead, I got not a single introduction," said a disappointed 43 year old who identified herself only as Jennifer. "
"I think I'll stick to meeting people at bus stops and the elevator," she said.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20051120/ts_afp/afplifestylejusticeinternetdatingscam_051120031925 | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 6:30:24 AM | Thats True.. I signed up for a month to Udate and it was 3 months before i got off the site..they take month out your bank 3 days before your time is up..and just before your time is up you get mail.. and guess what if your sign back up that person.. is nowhere to be seen.. same as Yahoo and match how can some one sent you a wink and your no a member on there.. or you get ..free mail from yahoo but in both you have to sign up to read your mail
i dont go on nay of them now.. this is a good site im happy with fish | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 6:51:52 AM | I'm chuckling, because GuessWho must be living on a different planet from me. On *my* planet, it's the women who are on the dating sites for fun and egoboo, who don't cancel their profiles despite being in a relationship, etc, etc. I'd really like to know where the F:M ratio is 5:1, cuz I want to move there! On average, it's about 51:49 in North America, though maybe if we send a whole bunch more young men off to war then the ratio might shift further.
Funny how people can have such diametrically opposed experiences in the same world, isn't it? The rational conclusion is that we're both wrong... | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 8:23:34 AM | Hell YES! It happened to me yesterday! I had a free trial membership at a pay site. 1st day I had 4 emails...2 were worded EXACTLY the same then nothing not even a response to my responses! I called yesterday to cancel my free membership and was talked into staying for another free month...this morning, 3 emails! DOH!! anyway...I only know of this one free site and I have found it friendly and I will be staying...but what are some others?? feel free to send to my email, I don't want to steal this thread...ciao Dayne
P.s....excellent post foxfire!!
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 8:29:01 AM | The biggest problem that I have had personally, with pay sites...is that even if I am a paid member, those who are NOT can't reply to me (a paid member!) without subscribing first!
That is how I determine the bogus sites from the authentic ones...as long as only ONE person needs to be a member to maintain contact, then it is legit. | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 8:50:42 AM | .
tired of being scamed?
Stop paying for dating or sex, MOST "real" men and women offer it for free! 
. | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 8:54:05 AM | Dear Huggy,
You said that women do not respond to your emails.... I think that is plain rude.... I take time to read every email and answer all phone calls...
I think it was how they were brought up, with no respect for any ones feelings....I treat people the way I want to be treated...nicely and with respect.
Thank you,
Always sincere
Char001 | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 9:08:44 AM | | One site that does this is "Heart Detectives". They admit to sending out "Winks" from people they think you will be a match with so do not pay on their site....bad news....you get lots of mail from people saying "Thanks for the wink, I like you too" and they are from the guys that are 20 years older and in no way someone you would be interested in...beware..... | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 9:19:01 AM | well...at least with "do not call" I dont get telespammed by dating services anymore. When I was in Hackensack, white trash scumbag from mall dating service just wouldnt leave me alone!
"This is the dating service."
click
"sorry sir there must have been a bad connection."
FINALLY I said "pleez dont call me here anymore!!"
somespamsite is probably the worst online service.
its just thinly disguised porn | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 9:20:14 AM | adult friend finder .com is the bad site.
dont censor me, POF I'm too smart, I'll break thru | |
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| are the pay sites scamming us
Posted: 11/20/2005 9:24:38 AM | | i hope these paying sites get taken to the cleaners at court.... well done... about time thses paying sites were closed down for good if you ask me!! | |
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