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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Why don't many guys have the guts to say they aren't interested?      Mod Threads Home login  
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 Author Thread: Why don't many guys have the guts to say they aren't interested?
 livetolearn

Joined: 7/4/2005
Msg: 101
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Why don't many guys have the guts to say they aren't interested?
Posted: 5/14/2006 7:39:38 PM
Very Well put! Saves alot of these
 tmorrow

Joined: 7/18/2006
Msg: 102
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Why don't many guys have the guts to say they aren't interested?
Posted: 9/18/2006 9:20:12 PM
Get used to being lonely? You could care less about other peoples' pain? Good God, I pity you. I also am someone who is alone and has consequently gone through the idiotic emotional gymnastics that go with it. Yes, I am used to being lonely, but I still hope that one day I won't be. Many of us on here seem to be the broken hearted, the lost, the solitary... Some of us are those cursed, wretched few who are alone even in a crowd of people. The opposite of loneliness is not just company of another human being, but the lovely thing of having someone whom you care for deeply who in turn cares for you. It is an understanding of one another. Hope against all reason, I dare you. Live life how you must in order to carry on, but wish--even if only in some hidden, unacknowledged part of your mind--that someone out there will find you.
 yes7

Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 103
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Why don't many guys have the guts to say they aren't interested?
Posted: 9/18/2006 9:40:43 PM
Yeah your right they dont care TERMINALLYCUTE. Theres only one thing to do, MOVE ON! Its hard sometimes though because you could really be into that one guy but oh well, better ones will come along. Although it would be nice if they made the signs pretty clear to let you know if their definitely interested or definitely not.
 Sir Angelis

Joined: 9/3/2006
Msg: 104
Why don't many guys have the guts to say they aren't interested?
Posted: 9/19/2006 8:19:34 AM

Over and over again, I have chatted with guys here, and things seem to go well...then they seem to just disappear, without even a word. I am probably the least intimidating girl you will ever come across, so why is is such a challenge for them to tell me when they aren't into me? Just a little honesty doesn't seem like too much to ask for. I totally understand if someone isnt interested, that's not the issue. I just wish that they could have the guts to come out and say it to me.


Okay here's one I am guilty of and I am about to try to be as honest abou how and why this happens (with ME at least) as I can, but it doesn't necessarily mean it is the same with ALL guys.

A specific example leaps immediately to mind. I was messaged by a very beautiful redhead (and I really like redheads) but before too long, despite her protestations of being honest and real, I just started to get the impression that she was a little too full of herself. I LOVE confidence in a woman. There is NOTHING more attractive than a smart, confident lady, but they second they come off with that, "So how will you prove you are good enough for me?" attitude. I write them off and did precisely that. Now, would it be productive or counterproductive to message her with, "Hey, I just think you are a self-centered, snooty, **** who is full of herself and probably only keeping me on the side until you will fail with someone else you want more anyway."?
Would that be entirely helpful? Even while I feel that she is i the wrong, is it MY PLACE to mess up her day with an opinion like that? Why? Will she not assume when I disappear that something just wasn't right?
In the case of it having actually gone as FAR as a relationship, that is an ENTIRELY different story, and as much as I can't stand disappointing, or hurting or makign a lady mad, I know it has to be done. I don't need to knwo a relationship will work, that is foolish. That is the whole point in starting one, to FIND OUT. But, the second I am sure it WILL NOT go to long-term/marriage, it is over. I dont' like having my heart dragged around and I refuse to ever be blamed or accused of doing such to another.
I don't know how helpful that is, but, that is my take on a couple of examples anyway.


- Scotty
 dolphinC

Joined: 9/10/2006
Msg: 105
Why don't many guys have the guts to say they aren't interested?
Posted: 10/4/2006 2:32:44 PM
Never met you, do not care to meet you and I was just browsing the comments to this interesting question and saw your comment....from that alone and nothing else, you sound like a jerk......................Next..........
 smileyme69

Joined: 6/5/2006
Msg: 106
Why don't many guys have the guts to say they aren't interested?
Posted: 10/9/2006 7:36:10 PM
[The old, "I don't want to hurt her" thing, if you gentlemen would be truly honest, translates to I don't want to have to go through an uncomfortable situation.]

This is exactly why there are so many people in disfunctional relationships or dating situations, draging someting they are not interested in on and on for way longer then it would be nessessairy.
Grow some balls and get it over with.
(I mean the ladies too..ahem not literally though lol)
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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Why don't many guys have the guts to say they aren't interested?