| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/2/2009 7:41:52 PM | My question is if you are looking for a relationship why sleep with someone on the first date?
Having sex and wanting a relationship are not the same thing. I've gotten into relationships with women who sleep with me on the first date. If a woman doesn't want to have sex with me after a couple of dates, she either isn't attracted to me enough for sex or a relationship or she doesn't have similar enough views on sex for a relationship.
but why can,t men wait for us instead of presuring us into sex. knowing us and seeing if we can get along is more importen than wanting sex
I never pressure a woman for sex, I just don't call a woman back once I realize she don't see the time frame the same way I see it. Wanting sex IS part of seeing if we can get along. I really don't see the problem. If you don't want to have sex, don't have sex. Just accept the fact that no matter what you do, you'll rule someone out. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/2/2009 8:00:00 PM |
My question is if you are looking for a relationship why sleep with someone on the first date?
Because on the road to looking for someone to be in a relationship with, you may very well find someone who you only want to have sex with. Just because someone is ultimately looking for long term, doesn't mean he isn't open to something casual if the opportunity arises. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/3/2009 10:55:55 AM | | I wouldn't care what he is thinking of me. If I were caught up in the passion of the moment and let it take me away it would be something I want to do. I know the first time is not the best and it could happen in a weird spot like a vehicle but u make the best of what u have and the next time if there is a next time will be better than the first time. I think it is hard to find that crazy passion with someone. I don't think it means your easy and I don't think the other person thinks do they always do this. If there is passion there is passion. I'm all about hot steamy crazy sex! | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/3/2009 11:35:32 AM | I think this is really a generational issue. It seems like it's the older guys who make judgments about a girl if she gets down on the first date.
Personally, if I go on an actual date with a girl, I already know her for a while before that. Secondly, I am exceedingly picky and I like my date to be as well.
So if it happened with me, I would think nothing of it other than the relationship just started.
:P | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/5/2009 3:12:58 PM | You know, this is REALLY not that hard to figure out. Two people...out there...looking for love, romance, good time, long term partner... You've just got to allow what happens to happen. If you're okay with it, fine. If the other person is okay with it, fine. The problem comes up when one has expectations that do not jibe with the other. In this instance, I have no sympathy for anyone and don't want to hear the complaining. If you have regrets, it simply means you slept together before you really knew the person well enough to sleep together!
If you're out to enjoy life, great! Go for it! But if you want more and you DON'T have a meaningful conversation with someone about it before jumping in the sack?... Sorry, you get EXACTLY what you allowed your hormones to drive you to. It's not his fault, it's not her fault... It is what it is. Nothing more, nothing less. The way to deal with it is beforehand. Either with the other person or with yourself. Know what you want, not just what you desire. Simple, really. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/6/2009 3:27:40 AM | I agree with some of the responses. If I have a great time and we connect, Why not have sex. Does that make me a slut? How do you know I have done this in the past. Why wait for a few months to find out that this guy cant fulfil all my fantisies. I like great sex and dont want to settle for second best. If we hit it off . I want to know he can fulfil all my needs later. I should not feel like a lesser woman for some choices I make. I am satisfied with my body and love to keep it fulfilled.makes a longer life as long as I an protected. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/6/2009 7:14:51 AM |
I like great sex and dont want to settle for second best. If we hit it off . I want to know he can fulfil all my needs later.
Meanwhile the guy is thinking... "Well, because she had sex on the first date, I'm not going to see her again so who cares if she enjoys it or not!".... so you might not be getting great sex anyway....
And aside from that, usually when you hardly know the person, the sex isn't all that great anyway.... | |
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| Date Ratings
Posted: 8/6/2009 5:36:25 PM | Is there a place to make comment about a date... like a review on line? I have a friend who says that he is able to see comments about women he dates on POF. I can't seem to find it. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 10:23:02 AM | First of all, we are all adults, and 'Sleeping Together' is a way that adults get to know each other.
If you DO sleep with someone on the first date,
Then don't get mad if it doesn't work out.
You BOTH had a choice, you BOTH agreed, and it didn't work out for what ever reason....
You just have to chalk that up to 'The heart wants what the heart wants' and move on.
I like women, but I'm a somewhat private person, and I get attached very quickly...
There is something to be said for romance, so I usually don't sleep with someone right away,
I get to know them first, and I try to trust them before we are that intimate.
That's just me, every one is different, so you have to decide what is 'RIGHT' for you and accept the consequences if it doesn't turn out the way you intended or wanted... | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 12:35:10 PM | I Honestley believe That if a girl is giving it up to u on the first date thats a tell tale sign that she is happy and comfortable with u and u shouldnt screw it up show the love back   | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 12:35:38 PM | | I Honestley believe That if a girl is giving it up to u on the first date thats a tell tale sign that she is happy and comfortable with u and u shouldnt screw it up show the love back | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 12:45:13 PM | | I wouldn't want to be with a guy that sleeps with a woman on the first date because you know he doesn't ask the important questions. Herpes and HPV can be spread even wearing a condom. He could easily have an STD and probably doesn't even get tested because he is in denial. If he doesn't respect himself not to sleep with a woman until he cares about her, he isn't worth the time of day! | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 1:02:05 PM |
I Honestley believe That if a girl is giving it up to u on the first date thats a tell tale sign that she is happy and comfortable with u and u shouldnt screw it up show the love back Or she's got a lot of issues...
Or she just fcuks everyone on the first date...
Or she has an STD and wants to 'share'....
Actually was an interesting one in the paper last week... guys were getting picked up in bars by a beautiful girl... she'd let them take her home with them.... when they get to the guy's place, she sends a text and then let's a group of guys that have followed them from the bar in to rob him... cops are looking for more people who may have been victimised... | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 5:55:19 PM | Well, depends on the circumstance. Recently i got back together with a guy i dated in high school. We did not have sex then but the chemistry was there. He contacts me years later, we meet, and we click. Granted we rushed into the sex thing but i really don't think i rushed as it felt natural, like a release of 10 years of not seeing him and finally being able to be with him (after the first date again, we met again and we had a blast) because old feelings came back and i could not help myself. There was such a strong connection there i couldn't resist. He was my first love. We dated like 2 months back then.......but it was amazing.
But yea, its funny a guy can sleep with a girl on the first night and be like "you go dawg"....but a girl does it and shes a slut. Double standard. BTW i don't see a problem with first date sex if 1) chemistry is there 2) you already know each other and feel its right, or 3) you accept all concequences that could happen if you are to do it. Some people do this for a daily thing. They just go on dates to get laid. As long as both of you are honest that you want sex or dont want it that fast....thats all that matters. Don't just lie to a girl to get in her pants the first night. Ugh. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 5:59:45 PM | | If a guy has to judge a girl for giving it up on the first date, then thats shallow. Especially if the girl spent time getting to know the person before doing it (like online), i would concider that totally different than say standing on a corner, looking for sex for money. Although yes, concequences can happen from first date sex. BUT if the guy doesn't call afterwards, he is NOT a big loss, HE'S obviously too into himself. I would not take it personal, just would be more careful next time! | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 6:01:23 PM | | I'll appreciate it--I just won't take her (or us) seriously as a long-term thing, because we've skipped the "getting to know you as a person" thing and it's clearly all about the physical (which is nice but I require a bit more on a spiritual level these days). But I'll always appreciate sex. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 7:10:15 PM | It really depends on the persons involved. I have had moments where I wanted to rip a guy out of his clothes, but I restrained myself only to find out later he was thinking the same thing, too! LOL
I like restraint, because for me it makes the decision to have sex awesome. You know more about the person, and how to please each other. One of the reasons why first date sex usually ends the onset of a LTR is because both sides feel there is a chance s/he is screwing another guy/gal on other dates since one date does not mean exclusivity. Yeah, that blows for the man or woman who thought this casual sex would lead to a LTR, but I did not make up the rules. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/7/2009 9:24:38 PM | That's a simple one. Just go with the flow or else it would get awkward. If both of you feel the urge to make out etc.. why..just like the sone from the group Asia
Heat of the moment
After that both have to act like responsible adults. Don't run away thinking you scored or she/he was too easy. It would have been a cold awakening if either partner refused. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/9/2009 6:15:00 AM |
It's not what she did with me, it is what she did with other guys. If it happened with me the first night, it happened with other guys the first night. That makes her easy and that's just gross.
Picture this........long distance--emails and talking on the phone. Eventually sexual tension builds, after a couple of months, the couple meets. She gives it up at first meet because she feels she has gotten to know him and thinks the possibility of falling in love is there. He has expressed he feels the same. They sleep together that same day. Both feel it was right. She tells him she has never done something like this before--and it was the truth.
Down the road, they break up because in the back of his mind, he feels she had done this before.
You foolish men............there is a first time for everything. | |
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| And if she sleeps with you on the first date?
Posted: 8/9/2009 8:16:05 AM | Do what you feel. Although, many will not admit it, I think most guys would sitck around after having sex on the first date. If not, then maybe they feel they have already accomplished their goal, which was sex. It's all a matter of comfort and chemistry. If a man really likes you, he will like you before and after sex. At least I hope he would. Do what you do, and the right ones for you, will follow your lead.
Disco Daddy had this right. | |
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