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Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?      Home login  
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 passionteman
Joined: 3/7/2005
Msg: 26
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out? Page 2 of 34    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34)
I don't believe such thing as ADD or ADHD exist. It is just society that affects children as well as how they are brought up that might bring about certain behaviour pattern. But it doesn't mean to take pills and put your whole body in dishormany.
 dewkiss31
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 27
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 1:32:15 PM
Well to all the ppl who don't have a child who is ADD or ADHD can kiss my BUTT I have a 10yr old son who is not only ADHD but has other problems also I am glad he is on meds because for years I tried the "NON-MEDS" way and it hurt him more than anything if he is not on his meds it is awful for him he can't consentrate can sit still no matter how hard he tries. He now gets A's in school is able to do his work without going off tast and does great!!!!!!!!!! Don't tell me to bust them in thier ASS!!! Because that does not work with an ADD or ADHD child. Some Children with ADD or ADHD have a mild form of it and it can be controlled with a diet change or other things but some kids need thoes meds. So get off your high horse and relize that some things are needed and they are not a COP OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 jessika2908
Joined: 6/17/2005
Msg: 28
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 1:58:10 PM
Wow Gee now I should kiss your butt because my child doesn't have ADD or ADHD. I don't think so. That is one the most inmature things I have ever heard!!! How dare you tell anyone to kiss your butt!! Wow that is a wonderful mommy role model that is all I have to say about that.
I am thrilled the meds are working for your child that is wonderful the whole reason I wrote this thread in the first place is because I have friends that I am concerned about and wanted other opinions about it. Not to start a flame war Dew. I know that there is cases out there that children would do better with the meds. But there is also cases out there that could be controlled with diet or have a underlying problem, and they are not ADHD or ADD. I do think SOME Drs and parents out there that are to willing to medicate before all other options are weighed.
And there is SOME parents out there that use it as a COP OUT!!!!!! They want to use the fact that there child is acting like a spoiled brat as they have ADHD and can't help it.
So my suggestion is get of your high horse just because your kid has a liget case of adhd doesn't mean there is children that do and are being medicated for no reason. Quit being so narrow minded.
 jn5218
Joined: 11/12/2005
Msg: 29
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 2:46:13 PM
ADHD is like depression, everyone thinks it's a cop out unless you have it. As children you become shunned; as adults, you become social outcasts. You miss a lot in life because you don't know what's going on. It's better to try and see if it works. Can always try other things later. my 2 cents. John
 dewkiss31
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 30
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 2:58:35 PM
Jess I was not refurring to you I was refuring to the ones who were say just beat thier butts and there is no reason to have a kids on meds not to you hun I am sorry if you took it that way I should have been more direct with who I was talking to.
 Douglajl
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 31
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 3:18:01 PM
in other words me

And I stand by it, there might be those few who are in need, but the majority is just lazy parenting.
 jessika2908
Joined: 6/17/2005
Msg: 32
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 4:09:38 PM
That is fine Dew I understand the reason I said that is because I know it is really hard to deal with a child that has this, and you should be happy for the parents that don't have children that have this too. I am always very happy for the parents when I hear about a success story or they find out that the adhd can be controlled.
 dewkiss31
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 33
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 4:28:50 PM
I never meant to make anyone feel bad I am just sick of ppl telling me that there are other options for this problem I think that I have done everthing I can to keep him off this med. thankfully we have got him on one that does not make him a zombie he was like that when we first started certian meds. But now he does great I am thankful that alot of parents don't have to go through this but some of them have no clue what they are saying unless they have been with a child who has a real form of ADD or ADHD and yes I agree that schools and DR sometimes do just throw a kid on meds because they don't want to have to deal with a child who is gifted and outgoing. I am sorry if I blased everyone but it does get old hearing that some ppl think that you are a failure as a parent if your child need these meds. I never meant to offend anyone but after reading some of those posts I guess I just went off.
 Not just a member
Joined: 9/14/2005
Msg: 34
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 5:46:15 PM
I am not sure if I think it is a cop out. I do know it is hard for me to pay attention when I am not interested in the subject at hand. I do know the school tried to tell me my son had ADD and I should have him medicated. I chose to ignore them. Everyone has likes and dislikes.... if the child pays attention when it is a subject or activity he loves, my thinking is he does not have ADD. He is not paying attention because he has zero to little interest. Find interesting subject matter and use it to your advantage. The teachers aren't familiar with my son nor his interests. My son loves sports, if I try to teach him an algebra problem using sports terms.... he not only pays attention, he learns it.
 jessika2908
Joined: 6/17/2005
Msg: 35
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 8:06:36 PM
Well, although my child does not have ADHD or ADD my best friends kids do, and if you ever had a friend like my best friend and I we share everything including our kids. If they are not at my house they all are at her house. I usally set the table for 4 to 5 and I only have one child. She has all rights to my daughter at school and I have all rights to her kids at school. But we have also been best friends for 13 years and our daughters are 2 weeks to the day apart from one another. So in a way I do have a son that has ADHD.
 mardioluv4u
Joined: 9/20/2005
Msg: 36
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 8:09:33 PM
I happen to have this disorder and it has been with me for some time since 1997 or earlier. I know how frustrating it can be along with the OCD that I have.

I think they mean the same thing though in general.
 pacificnwblonde
Joined: 10/9/2005
Msg: 37
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ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 8:54:06 PM
Like any condition, disease or ailment, ADD/ADHD needs to be addressed on an individual basis. Diet my work for one & not for another. For some, medication is indeed an answer. I too had teacher's saying my son was ADHD & I fought it tooth & nail, we tried diet, behavior modification, the whole nine yards. We happen to have a pediatrician who does NOT hand out ritalin like peppermints after dinner. He insisted on further testing. When my son WAS put on meds, it made such an enormous difference in his life that I felt like I had been abusive by denying that change. It does NOT make him a zombie. When unmedicated, THAT is when he is not himself! The meds sort of complete a connection in his brain that make him pleasant, not impulsive, works well in class, he's funny, imaginative & creative. Some parents may put their kids on as an easy out, but by no means judge us all that way, for some of us it was a well studied, well planned decision for the betterment of our children.
 jessika2908
Joined: 6/17/2005
Msg: 38
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 9:01:29 PM
I know that there is other types of meds to take care of ADHD is that based on individuals as well? I really worry about the long time side effects of these types of meds too. I think that everything has been done that can be done fine do what you have to do. However if not everything has been done then do everything possible.
I have also noticed that everyone that has posted that have children with ADHD have boys. Is this more common in boys then girls? I know my best friends daughter has not had any signs of this. I wonder why more boys have this then girls? That is just my observation thus far though.
 pacificnwblonde
Joined: 10/9/2005
Msg: 39
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ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 9:14:17 PM
I work in an elementary school & it is MUCH more common in boys!! Off the top of my head, I would guess 3/1.
 YouLookHotterOnline
Joined: 6/9/2005
Msg: 40
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/12/2005 9:33:50 PM
This is such a touchy subject. I just did a huge paper on this for school and my son was tested for ADD so I feel I have an educated opinion.

Ritalin is prescribed much too often nowadays, however, if a doctor says that your child should be on it and you are opposed, there is nothing stopping you from getting a second opinion. I believe that ritalin and similar drugs are extremely beneficial if used correctly and can help to improve a child's social life and all other facets of their day-to-day living.

I find many parents panick when someone suggests medication, however, you can start on small doses and moniter the child to make sure the personality isn't being altered.

Many areas of a child's life are affected when he has ADD/ADHD. Many are excluded from play time with other children, their grades suffer, and both home and school life are difficult. If a doctor feels that medication can help their quality of life isn't it worth looking into? I would do anything to improve my child's life.
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 41
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ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 12:09:26 AM
THE FEELING OF HAVING ADHD

Having ADHD is like being put into a dark room with things scattered around to trip you. You don't get a flashlight ..... but everyone else does. You trip around the room, bumping into things, until you finally learn the layout of the room. Then someone moves you to a new room, and the process starts again.

It's like having a whirlwind in your mind. Everything seems to be blowing around and nothing stays put. Some people have compared the feeling to watching someone change the channels on the TV every few seconds. You can get a general idea of what is going on, but you miss most of the content.

People with ADHD tend to be "socially blind". They may miss rules and structures which other people see much more readily.


THE NEUROLOGY OF ADHD
The lower portion of the brain contains an area known as the Reticular Activating System. It keeps the higher brain centers alert and ready for input. There is some evidence that this area is not working properly in ADHD, and that the brain is, in effect, "going to sleep". Hyperactivity is really the brain's attempt to generate new stimulation to maintain alertness.

THE BRAIN

PET scans (Positron emission tomography, also called PET imaging) and other new imaging technologies have helped researchers investigate the activity in different areas of the brain. A number of studies have shown lower levels of blood flow and activity in the frontal lobes of children with ADHD when compared to those without ADHD.

Adults with a history of hyperactivity also have lower levels of blood flow in their brains. The PET scans show there is less activity in the frontal regions of the ADHD brain compared to a normal brain.

A goal of treatment is to bring the ADHD individual to a "normal" state of arousal so that being able to pay attention requires much less effort. CNS (Central Nervous System) stimulants are the first medication of choice as it helps reduce the symptoms of ADHD. For a person without ADHD, these medications would create a "high" (or excessive energy), however, a person with ADHD does not receive that described "high".

My son had ADHD. He used Ritilin and it made all the difference in the world. While using his medication and attending his therapy sessions, he was on the honor roll, learned how to play a musical instrument, participated successfully in karate lessons, learned how to Western Style Square Dance. Without it, he could not pay attention in school, could not focus even long enough to do his homework, could not stay on task long enough to even finish dinner, get dressed for school in the mornings, the list goes on.

I used to head up support groups for families of children with ADHD ... anyone who wants can feel free to contact me through my email with questions and further information about what can happen to a child who does not get help.

My son died last month at the age of 22 trying to deal with this disorder after his father refused to acknowledge his need for help, took him off of his medication and refused to take him to therapy. It ruined his life.

As you have read above, there are tests that can be conducted in order to truly determine if your child has this disorder. I would never propose that anyone be medicated unless thorough testing is done. But once it is truly determined that your child has this disorder, do your child a favor and do whatever it takes to help them.




IT IS REAL and can be quite devasting for those who suffer from it. IT'S NOT A COP-OUT!
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 42
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ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 7:08:31 AM
pacificnwblonde


I work in an elementary school & it is MUCH more common in boys!! Off the top of my head, I would guess 3/1.


They still do not know why this is, but "pacific" you are correct ... more boys than girls are afflicted with this dibilitating problem, more have blonde hair and blue eyes, more have respiratory allergies, almost 100 % of the people afflicted are of way above average I.Q.

Having the higher I.Q. is sometimes the only saving fact for these people ... because they are so smart, even though they are unable to "pay close attention" for any length of time, they pick things up quickly when the mind is paying attention.

On medication, they are usually honor roll students ... as was the case with my own son. Without medication, he was only getting by. All the medication does is stimulate their brain the way a normal persons brain would be stimulated naturally.

Maybe it would be easier to think about this way ... when you remove a woman's ovaries, you give her hormone replacement therapy ... because the organ that was normally producing the hormone has been removed and the body still needs that hormone.

In order to "pay attention" properly, the brain needs the stimulant that is in the medication you are giving the child. Each child reacts differently to different medications, so they try to have different medications available depending on what the child's brain will best respond to.

Also, as the child moves through puberty, the chemicals in their body also change and they have discovered that a child who has been successfully responding to ritilin (for example) may no longer respond to it and you may have to change to a different medication during that time. This is why even once the child has been properly diagnosed, you can't just then give that child that medication forever after and not follow the child closely.

These children need to be followed closely throughout treatment.

Again, don't hesitate to write me for more information if you so desire.


 pacificnwblonde
Joined: 10/9/2005
Msg: 43
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ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 10:32:28 AM
Cotter

I found the blonde/blue eyed factor you mentioned sooooo interesting. All three of my children have shown symptoms all their lives, but only my youngest was severe enough to be tested. They are all blue-eyed, blondes. When I started putting faces to kids @ my school that I know are diagnosed ADHD, it fit there too!
 dewkiss31
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 44
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 11:46:42 AM
too jess's question my daughter is now showing signs of ADHD I have been working with the school to keep her off meds we are going to try the herbal form for helping with ADHD (which did not help my son unfourtunatly) But I am doing everything I can to keep her off the meds. I am ADHD and so is the kids Father. I think it is more hereditary, Yes I see more boys with this problem than girls I am getting a book on ADHD to try more things but I feel that every aspect has been tried with my son and I am hoping that we won't need to do that with my daughter. I also know that with extra stimilation that can also cause problems with ADHD kids. I hope this answers some questions
 jessika2908
Joined: 6/17/2005
Msg: 45
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 3:47:25 PM
Just a suggestion take them off anything that has red dye # 5 I think in it.
 blueflame11
Joined: 9/15/2005
Msg: 46
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 5:04:40 PM
If you read up about and discuss it with your doc it would make a better choice. My dd is boarderline. Her school really insisted on putting her on it. Personnally I was against because they (society) always want you on something (birth control, paxil, estrogyn). My doctor explained to me that if she can sit still for periods of time read etc., she doesn't need it. The school prefered her to be on so they could control the class better. My doctor explained to me that its a natural chemical that should kick in after puberty. I'm glad I stuck with my chioce. I just prefer to keep her busy, swimming, big sis, program communit center and house work. The other side of the choice is I have a friend that I stopped talking to because her twin boys did need something because a visit when they were six was impossible, they would always sinterrrupt even TV was out of the question. She put them on a rittilen. It was a complete turn around even the boys on summer vacation would not do go without the medicine (sometimes parents will go off the meds in the summer).
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 47
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ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 5:44:04 PM
Jess .... red dye has nothing to do with it.

even the boys on summer vacation would not do go without the medicine (sometimes parents will good off the meds in the summer).

And that's understandable ... children do not need a break from the medication in summer ... giving them a break just gives them back the "feeling" of having ADHD. I'm telling you it breaks my heart to visualize any child having to go through with that day in and day out. I copied it below.

How would any of us feel with something going on like that in your head every waking moment?

THE FEELING OF HAVING ADHD

Having ADHD is like being put into a dark room with things scattered around to trip you. You don't get a flashlight ..... but everyone else does. You trip around the room, bumping into things, until you finally learn the layout of the room. Then someone moves you to a new room, and the process starts again.

It's like having a whirlwind in your mind. Everything seems to be blowing around and nothing stays put. Some people have compared the feeling to watching someone change the channels on the TV every few seconds. You can get a general idea of what is going on, but you miss most of the content.

People with ADHD tend to be "socially blind". They may miss rules and structures which other people see much more readily.
 sereneroosta
Joined: 8/28/2005
Msg: 48
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 6:08:08 PM
I have had ADD my whole life, I was off medication from the ages of 17 to 35, and I can tell you from experience its not a cop out of anything like that. My life was a mess when I wasn't on meds and now I can hold a good job and actually have some self esteem. Most people don't understand it because the medications they give normal people don't affect us the same way. it is a chemical imbalance and cant be disiplined away or taken care of by diet or anything else. I hope this helps, careful diagnosis is the key, as is having an expert in the field dothe diagnosis..............
 jessika2908
Joined: 6/17/2005
Msg: 49
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 6:19:37 PM
Cotter some kids are alergic to red dyes me for one and it can masks the side effects of adhd or add. If you check out my previous posts I think maybe my 2nd or 3rd it will tell you what happened when I was a child.
 leafslady
Joined: 6/8/2005
Msg: 50
ADHD and ADD the real thing or a cop out?
Posted: 11/13/2005 6:44:33 PM
Cotter..I just want to say your posts are fantastic!Thank you for the insight.

I asked my ADHD son ,when he was much younger,why he did certain things(outbursts,climbing on furniture etc..)He told me it he didn't want to do those things,but his brain told him different.I guess that's how an 8 year-old would describe it.
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