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| | Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' TheoryPage 6 of 8 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8) | yes we know that women don't go for good men nowdays.....especially the typical american woman. guys who are worth their weight in salt financially stable and have a job with plenty to bring to the table shouldn't even waste their time on a woman.
the entitlement minded self-aggrandizing nature of the typical american woman.....in fact most western women in general......the feminazi simple-minded BS they try to use to keep good men lurking in the shadows is pathetic. their battle cries of no good men are available and/or they desperately would love to find a good man only to waste their time with pathetic piece of trash losers rings clear that they are not worthy of a good man to begin with. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 10/27/2011 10:30:38 PM |
Whoever said you were is lying to you. Because you can't seem to let someone have an opinion, there for you are nothing close to an alpha male. I told you to get back on topic and you listened. You'd spit shine my shoes if I told you to do it, but I'll spare ya on that one.
Your assumption of someone spending a lot of money on pickup artist stuff is wrong, because I haven't spent a penny on it.
Your assumption that it doesn't work is also wrong, as I have learned a lot and had a lot of success from it.
If you don't like people telling you you're wrong, then say that you just don't like it .Because saying that it doesn't work and that it's expensive makes you wrong, as I have just proved that you are just now. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 10/28/2011 10:22:03 AM |
I think it all boils down to the "law of attraction".If your a hot looking guy,it doeosn't matter if your a "nice guy type" or a total ass,you'll get the hot chicks no matter what.Or for that matter you can get any woman you want thats available.
Hell, even Mr. Universe will tell you that's a load of crap.
"Nice guys finish last" only applies when your less than average looking,overweight,not working etc.
No, it doesn't.
For those of you still trying to grasp the idea of what a 'Nice Guy' is, there is a better word for it - The Kiss-up. They are the guy that fawns over women, compliments them incessantly, and really does not show any backbone when he is around them. Income, good looks, height, religion - NONE of that matter if you still Kiss-up to a woman when they look to you for an opinion.
Being 'Nice' does not take a great deal of effort - anyone can be 'Nice'. Your bus driver or waiter can be 'Nice'. Nice is pleasant - but NOT attractive. Just like hugs are pleasant - but NOT arousing. If you want to break out of that role, you have to be DECISIVE and CONFIDENT. Please note - being contrary or stubborn is NOT the same thing - THAT is what makes you an A$$hole. Get the idea? Good. I just saved you a boatload of cash buying those self-help dating books. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 10/29/2011 4:55:45 PM | oi... so full of fail this thread is...
Was it Watson who said 'Give me a baby and I will make you any kind of man'? Males in this society are engineered to fail at relationships. Boys are made to be submissive, emotionally repressed, soft, uncaring and disrespectful. There are so many little details that create huge picture of failure. Partially due to feminism and sexual revolution. PUA's and MRA's see this as huge problem and provide patch personality fixes that sometimes do more harm then good.
Assertive morals/behavior and balanced emotions are crucial in relating to people in general. PUA's dictate this doctrine of going after what you want and not bending to wills of others. Both are good qualities in moderation. Disrespect and arrogance are not. I can relate to some material and found it surprising to agree on some ideas from popular PUA's as I was avoiding that community as a plague. The whole alpha mask is a joke as it will attract limited range and kind that you really don't want to associate with. First neglecting/downplaying female intuition is a huge mistake. You can't put a mask on and expect to have any woman you want at your feet. I can spot a player a mile out and seeing expressions on womens faces is priceless entertainment. Pure disgust, shock and terror as this synthetic robot is trying to relate to someone he does not understand. It's kind of like seeing Terminator smile.
MRA's on other hand have a different approach that seems to have similar agenda to feminism. (I might get crucified for that statement) Majority of ideas are beneficial to average male but again arrogance, disrespect, polarization and sometimes pure misogyny erode at the core of the ideology.
Fast solutions do not provide lasting results and in consumerist/instant gratification culture this is what sales. You can't throw a switch and become a poon magnet. The whole goal is to score and it is the main problem. As most men tend to concentrate on one problem at a time, women are empathic, multitasking machines. Working on your personality just to get your****wet or seek validation from opposite sex is simply idiotic. Emotional intelligence is second nature to most women and guys straggle to learn how to read women. That is what being nice is about, to recognize and help people in distress without expectancy of reciprocation. This does not mean sacrificing your morals or self respect.
According to psychological principle it is possible to change human personality as a whole. Disturbing thought but educational none the less. If a 'nice guy' fails with women it isn't the nice part that is the problem. Chivalry and selfishness can never be bad qualities. Identifying and isolating underlying problems is the basics of self improvement. Majority of 'nice guy' problems are lack of self respect/esteem and submissive behavior. Easy problems to identify and fix if they exist. Self improvement should be taken literally. There should not be underlaying goal other then become best You. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 10/29/2011 6:32:32 PM | ^^^ Let me take the liberty of condensing the above, as I understood it: you need a bigger problem!
Women ain' t your problem! There is no quick fix for not having done enough living. You cannot create gravitas, you have to earn it. Women won't validate you, women won't complete you, women won't make you a man. You gotta do it. Find something, a quest. Something bigger than who you think you are. Maybe someone will want to come along for the ride. But that's not your motivation. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/6/2011 9:24:27 PM | I went out for a couple of months with a fellow who kept saying, "Nice guys always finish last and I am a nice guy." Well, this "nice guy" continually bashed both his exes- he had said that he was divorced, but he was separated - which made me feel uncomfortable; he *yelled* on the phone on more than one occasion to his mother and bashed his father; he told me that my priorities are messed up (I am in school retraining for IT, background in law) because I like computers; he said that my priorities are messed up because I am pursuing additional education and have a master's to follow this stint; he ordered me to grocery shop (did not ask). There are other things that I could put as examples, but I believe that I have posted a sufficient amount there. btw, all of the outbursts that he had were in PUBLIC.
I would love to date a nice guy. A truly nice guy. Not someone who claims to be nice and has no idea that he is actually a complete jerk. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/6/2011 9:26:11 PM | I went out for a couple of months with a fellow who kept saying, "Nice guys always finish last and I am a nice guy." Well, this "nice guy" continually bashed both his exes- he had said that he was divorced, but he was separated - which made me feel uncomfortable; he *yelled* on the phone on more than one occasion to his mother and bashed his father; he told me that my priorities are messed up (I am in school retraining for IT, background in law) because I like computers; he said that my priorities are messed up because I am pursuing additional education and have a master's to follow this stint; he ordered me to grocery shop (did not ask). There are other things that I could put as examples, but I believe that I have posted a sufficient amount there. btw, all of the outbursts that he had were in PUBLIC.
I would love to date a nice guy. A truly nice guy. Not someone who claims to be nice and has no idea that he is actually a complete jerk. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/7/2011 7:41:05 AM |
I think it all boils down to the "law of attraction".If your a hot looking guy,it doeosn't matter if your a "nice guy type" or a total ass,you'll get the hot chicks no matter what.
I would say generally speaking, the arrow definitely points in that direction. Looks is the #1 thing, as far as getting your foot in the door, and definitely for a quick Spring Break fling, etc. It isn't Quite as blanketed as you say though, I don't think -- a hot looking guy can easily end up not being able to hold or slip into a Relationship with anyone. And if you crank up the 'total ass' part to the nth degree, he'd need to be in a room full of Avg-Joes-at-best to garner any results... but yes, even a total ass will end up (at least temporarily) getting Avg-Janes if he's smoking hot.
So my theory is that theres no such thing as a "Nice guys finish last"syndrome or even a "Nice girls finish last" syndrome.It all depends on who you are,what you look like,who you can attract.
I partially agree, but there's an elephant in the room you're missing, though. The persona/swagger/attitude of a guy CAN mean a lot. No, it's not going to make a guy who's a 1/10 get a gal who's a 9/10.
Basically, if a guy has too much of a soft side... and comes off by his body-language, choice of words, and predictability as someone trying to "woo" the girl, she'll have less interest in him than another guy who's more "alpha" than that, if she's attractive and gets more than her fair share of attention.
I think the "Nice Guys Finish Last" thing is for guys with Very Poor "game", and for guys who are just basic/general in their "game" and not surprisingly, can't get a girl who's a "league" above them unless she's got some real issues. Said guy thinks "They say they want Nice Guys, but obviously not!" Well, it's not about just being Nice. You have to be Attractive -- and where your looks doesn't statistically cut it with the level of gals you pursue, you have to make your persona/style be maximal, which will make up for that in many eyes. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/7/2011 7:42:59 PM | I realize your example tells clearly that the guy was an a$$hole, but when I read this statement below (and it shows up a LOT)...
I would love to date a nice guy. A truly nice guy. Not someone who claims to be nice and has no idea that he is actually a complete jerk.
...I think; Pardon my bluntness, but would you have sex with said 'Nice guy'?
The reason I bring this up, is there is an EXTREMELY fine line between a true 'nice' gentleman that still gets your motor running, and a nice FRIEND that will never hurt you. Once you 'friend' a guy, there's very very little they CAN do to make themselves appear romantic again. I have plenty of women that call me their friend, but absolutely NONE of them would make out in the back seat with me. Any effort from then-on that tries to force you to change those friend glasses to a different view basically MAKES them a "complete jerk" - when all they wanted to do is get noticed.
There are stories all over the internet of people finding their true loves in friends that they never thought of as dating material at first. You may have already MET them - is there anyone you have as a friend that you WOULD go home with? Think about that. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/7/2011 8:01:03 PM | | sorry white rabbit but you're trying to use logic and we all know what women don't have any logic whatsoever when it comes to men. they will screw a loser without blinking an eye but won't pay a bit of attention to men who are worth a damn. that's just the way ameriskanks are. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/7/2011 8:49:06 PM | This thread is so full of fail...
Good guy (which I take to mean "Nice guy") refers to a pansy essentially. Of course any gal is gonna not feel attracted to this guy.
That's not to say you shouldn't be a douchebag. But you can at least be assertive/confident in yourself rather than be in agreement with EVERYTHING she says (unless you really do agree, in which case, you're better off being friends). You can be nice sure, but don't be a wuss.
FYI, I'm not a wuss. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/7/2011 9:57:00 PM | Fellas, sorry to break it to you but the theory is false. Completely false. First of all do some self-reflecting. Are you flawless??? I highly doubt it, so before you go looking for a woman, work on yourselves. Make your negative aspects or flawed characteristics better. Work on them. They won't change over night.
I also used to feel like the 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory was true. I then decided to quit searching for a woman. I quit getting upset because numerous amounts of women would disregard the very man that stood before them. I started to work on my flawed characteristics and occupied the rest of my time taking the necessary steps to pursue my dreams and aspirations. Am I flawless? Heck no, by no means. What I have done is progressively grown, in all aspects, into the type of man that mature, intelligent women want.
The issue for a lot of women, young women especially, is that they don't truly know what they want. They like a challenge. They want some individual that fits some stereotype, and then they want to change and mold them into they type of man that they want. If they knew what they wanted they wouldn't get caught up in the same old garbage, time after time after time. We are living in a time where a vast number of individuals are lost. People aimlessly living life without any direction, goals, or purpose. If people truly embodied those things then the world we live in now would not be so chaotic. Women would not fall for men who lacked substance, good morals, drive/motivation to make something of themselves. They wouldn't put their dreams, goals, and aspirations on the back burner while they CHOOSE to have unprotected sex at an early age and wind up pregnant. Same goes for those not so "good guys" with several children/ baby mommas. I am far from gender bias. It takes two to tango... (I have a lot more to say but I prefer not to bore you all...)
Long story short fellas, if you are a "good guy" then continue being one. The women that do pass you by is simply their misfortune, not yours. Patience, the right one will come around. Please do not press the issue because if you do you will end up settling and content. Not happy, just simply content.
All in all, I hope the "good guys" out there are seeking happiness. Being impatient leads to settling which leads to contentment, which leads to unhappy, unsuccessful relationships/marriages.
Good luck to you all. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/8/2011 10:29:17 AM |
Good guy (which I take to mean "Nice guy") refers to a pansy essentially. Of course any gal is gonna not feel attracted to this guy.
Not a social, outgoing attractive gal who has a lot of options (all other things being roughly equal). But I wouldn't say "Good Guy" -- but in some tone, it can mean Nice Guy. Some may call "Good Guy" being someone who's an in-betweener.
But you can at least be assertive/confident in yourself rather than be in agreement with EVERYTHING she says (unless you really do agree, in which case, you're better off being friends).
 Totally Agree. If you're coming across as someone who's trying to gain her approval & validation, you're basically saying "You have a higher value than I do". Or in other words, "I am not a Catch -- I am a fish wanting to jump in your boat; you say jump, I'll say how high".
Many guys are taught to be on the angle to gain approval and conform to garner a Lady's interest, but in reality, that doesn't work when an attractive woman has tons of guys tripping over their own feet to do so to get in her pants. She ends up looking for a Catch, not a Gimme. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/8/2011 5:29:47 PM | | Women who want a nice guy, but keep finding jerks have only themselves to blame. It's not that all men a jerks just looking for a piece of ass, but it's what you keep finding because you subconsciously still want it. If you really didn't want it, you would be looking else where, and broadening your horizons. Men view the Nice Guys as...wimps. Plain and simple, because of their way of doing things. When guys are talking with their buddies do you hear them talking about how much of a lovely night they had with this girl and how much they can see themselves with this girl? No, They are talking about how big her rack was, how attractive she was, and if they made it all the way with her, how much fun she was. If a guy were to talk about the lovely night they shared he would be viewed as wimp, or **** whipped. The bad boy is the Rockstar according to men. He gets the girls....All of them, has money, a camaro, tattoos, doesn't care what her or anyone thinks of him, does what he wants when he wants, and leaves the girl behind. It's all about attitude, no wonder women want the bad boys. With women when they sit around and talk about men that they have met, been on dates with, and have slept with. Women you both kinds of conversations...When a woman is talking about the nice guy her friend always say, "He was cute,and he seemed like such a nice guy." and the guy probably was, but not appealing to her because he paid too much attention to her, she was never really that into him but wanted to give him a shot, or he opened up too fast. Among other reasons. When they talk about the bad boy it's always "He is so hot and when we went back to his place and he rocked my world." Bad boys have a certain charisma to them, and women gravitate to it because it shows confidence. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/8/2011 5:46:09 PM | "Women who want a nice guy, but keep finding jerks have only themselves to blame"
RockyDakota thanks for telling it like it is and needs to be told. Sorry ameriskanks but if you get drunk and get a DUI it's not the cop's fault that you got arrested. If you don't go to work and get fired, it's not your employer's fault you got fired. it's your fault. so....if you keep getting treated like sh!t by men it's not the man's fault it's your fault for choosing him. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/9/2011 5:44:39 PM | first we need define nice guy vs a jerk:
nice guy: a guy she can call for favors and he doesn't expect anything in return.
jerk: a guy she calls for favors but who expects something in return.
who does she pick? : she picks a guy who does nothing for her but has found some line of BS and has her convinced that she's oh so lucky to have him. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/9/2011 5:54:43 PM | Of course women want men that they connect to on a sexual basic level and if they are going with jerks then it shows low self esteem even if they are beautiful or whatever. Depends on how the men in their early life were. It is complicated.
Some women do have a masochistic streak. I say, one **stard in a lifetime is enough.
A man who is a mamby pamby doormat will be walked on, too eager to please, he will be taken advantage of...... But healthy women want both a man that is decent and caring and also protective and masculine. Who can cut it out there in the big bad world.. .. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/9/2011 5:57:24 PM | free4all13220
SOunds like sour grapes!!!!.... You are being way too general and the women you describe have no sense of discrimination or self esteem at the end of the day.
Sexual chemistry is an elusive thing and cant be quantified and is responsible for all sorts of bad choices until we mature a bit and appreciate other qualities as much.
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/9/2011 8:54:06 PM | Nice.
What does it mean?
I want people in my life who are
Kind.
Considerate.
Passionate.
Opinionated.
I think only half of that fits in the "nice" category.
I believe that if you are labeled as "Nice" then you are just as out of balance as "Mean".
I need balance in my life, I seek it, I am attracted to it, I try to achieve it. So do I want just "Nice"???
No more than I want "Mean". | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/10/2011 10:51:13 AM | Know your own mind. Know where your own boundaries are. Know what you will do when people violate those boundaries. That is essential.
If you are nice to women but are not willing to walk away when they treat you badly, then you will only get more abuse.
Don't put women on pedestals. Don't be a White Knight. Don't be Captain-Save-A-Ho. Don't be submissive. Don't base your identity on how nice you are to other people. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/12/2011 3:09:41 PM |
first we need define nice guy vs a jerk:
nice guy: a guy she can call for favors and he doesn't expect anything in return.
jerk: a guy she calls for favors but who expects something in return.
who does she pick? : she picks a guy who does nothing for her but has found some line of BS and has her convinced that she's oh so lucky to have him.
Nice guys do expect something in return: sex. If they didn't expect anything in return, we wouldn't even have this thread in the first place, and the whole nice guy vs jerk debate wouldn't be an issue because a nice guy doesn't expect anything. But he does. He expects it, and when he doesn't get what he expects, he blames the women for being stupid and the jerks for getting the very pu*sy that he is trying to get. | |
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| Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 11/12/2011 3:46:52 PM | You guys are so funny.
These threads are making me think the difference between the “nice” guy and the “jerk” is the level of insidiousness in the bullshyte. | |
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