| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 4/22/2009 12:01:11 PM | | I do, but every guy I end up with, had a girl that ****ed them right over, either cheated on him, was a complete **** and controlling, or left him for no reason. And the guy loved them, but got really hurt, so when i come around and im not like any of those (im the one that was cheated on, controlled, even physically abused, and left for no reason) but by the time im there, they want to hook up, and one night stand, or they jus don't want to be in a relationship, they jus want to enjoy being single for a while. and it EFFING SUCKS. no joke. I've had 3 heart breaks and been used for just sex twice. And cheated on 3 times. and only been with 4 guys (actual relationship) the other 2 weren't sure, and jus said they wanted to be friends, even tho stuff already happened between us. I think girls are the ones that are screwed in the head when it comes to relationships. most guys my age, have dads, that are old fashioned, so they are themselves. But then they have that ex that ****ed it up for them. So then i get the shit end of it all. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 4/22/2009 1:13:56 PM | I'm also beginning to think girls don't really want nice guys. It's like a dating consultant once said "if you hear a girl say, oh he's a nice guy, you can whip out your money and place bets she's not interested in them." Girls just don't use the word nice to describe guys they are interested in. I'm beginning to think saying that they're interested in nice guys is just something girls are giving lip service to but don't really mean. Or maybe they really mean it but get blinded by looks in the process of their search for the nice guy. I'm a nice guy but I can never get a girl that interested in me, not sure why. Nowhere is the phrase "nice guys finish last" more true than with women. It kinda sucks.  It's be nice if women would practice what they preach....attraction is more about looks but they don't follow their own advice. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 4/22/2009 5:16:00 PM | I have 2 theories about women:
1) Women only want men that other women want!
This generally isn't a "nice guy"; it's not a gentleman; it's generally the "playa"/"bad boy".
2) Women like to complain to their "nice" male friends about how they wish they could find someone like him, but never want to date him. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 4/22/2009 10:52:14 PM | I want a nice guy- not a doormat, dont want someone who would abuse me physically or emotionally; someone who can speak their mind/voice their opinion; argue a point home .. but be considerate & treat others well. I treat other people the way I want to be treated
as said by a lady here i want some one who treats me as i treat them , whith love , consideration and compassion, and other thingsthat are entailed in a relationship.
i have been on this planet too long to be screwed around and screwed with and need just the nice considerate gentle guy who wants me for me to find me and take me to the stars and stay there with me now where do you think anyone like that is , they they girls and guys do not believe in forever any more and thater lies the problem. we all ask too much from each other and just cannot get our acts together to be able to melde into one whole being instead of two halves hurting each other along the way, and getting dissolussioned. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?winston877..............
Posted: 4/22/2009 11:36:16 PM | AHHHHHH, I was laying here and reading this whole thing just because someone sent me a message and I got interested. I get it...women are def drawn to men who treat them like shit...yes but I dont think any of you quite understand why. As a woman would vent and share her day with you and talk about the girl who said this to this girl and so on and so forth and you would put on the FIX IT HAT and try to make it better....thats exactly what a woman does with a bad boy. They dont want to be treated that way but somewhere there is a thought that we (I) can change them....we are all about change. The longer we try to play bullshit and try to fix things the more we think WE are better.
Im sorry Ive done the bad boy thing, Ive done the good guy thing. I just want to find someone I can relate to. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 4/23/2009 12:05:04 PM | | They say they do but all that you have to do is look around and pay attention and you will see that is not the case. Women want a challenge not a door mat. If you try and do everything for them, it turns into almost always one person being taken advantage of sooner or later. I only say this because I have learned over time and I watched my older sisters work their magic growing up. Being a nice guy to me sounds like an insult. You get no respect as a nice guy. Good luck. Oh I almost forgot never be predictable. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 4/23/2009 8:52:11 PM | I can translate this question into terms of my own life,,, I know some women like to have a project, years ago I had long rocker hair , some gals were attracted to that,  I think they viewed me as a bad boy or project. I imagine women view Badboys as a project ie, My love will save him/change him. having said that , Ive dated enough Women over the years to where I can say a fair amount of them early on in the relationship unconsciously tested me by pushing my buttons. Over time I've learned its a womans way of testing for respect, . If a man fails these tests, he can be put into the "too nice" category or yes even a whimp (NOTE, some of these tests are easy for badboys to pass because they don't care and some women find that challenging) I realized that eventually a woman has to respect a man for the relationship to grow.. We all want things like security , and trust in a relationship , and to get that there must be "Respect" . Some of the things that past girls I dated have said or done, just didn't make sense to me at the time, (ie if someone cares about me , I just turn cold ?) until I realized that most of these women knew when they were being out of line, and they wanted to see how I'd respond. Personally i think its universal, the test for respect.... If a mans response to these little tests is too nice or no reaction,,,,, (when the woman knows she should be reprimanded) she could perceive him a doormat to be walked upon. How the man reacts to these unconscious tests determines a lot in woman's mind as to how he will be considered in the relationship.. Once a woman decides she doesn't have much respect for a man its difficult to "make" her feel anything. Once I realized this things got a whole lot easier for me
my 2 cents | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 4/23/2009 9:18:16 PM | Very insightful, Rumblewolf.
And men pay mucho $$$$$ to learn that through therapy. If they listen to you, they will save a lot of cash and headaches.
Women ALWAYS subconciously test men. Those who fail the test (by being too nice or clingy) are automatically put into the doormat category and no longer desireable. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/27/2009 2:10:47 PM | | My seense of it that the phrase"nice guy" is code for 'a respectful male who puts the needs of others first to the degree that they appear to be weak or unmanly.'.I have been accused of this many times.Confidence is a tremendous attractive force.The preferred stance is one of confidence balanced by respect and empathy.To answer the question,my experience says that women do not want a 'nice guy' in the former sense. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/27/2009 2:53:51 PM | no they dont they say they do but thats bullshit like the saying goes nice guys are last all the time so maybe its time to not be the nice guy and good luck | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/28/2009 12:50:07 AM | Yes, we like attractive nice guys. Unattractive nice guys we don't.
Translation: we like attractive guys
Interpretation: what does attractive mean to you?
Bet you thought it was about skin and looks huh? | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/29/2009 12:01:03 PM | I like that and on the flip side as someone once said do not mistake my kindness as weakness.
Also I am drawn to say if something is not broke why try to fix it lol For maybe the whole bad boy thing they do not see themselves as being broken. For they get what they want no matter the cost to others and or themselves. As well can be said for the nice guy theory. They can be an often do view themselves as not being broken and that just means you are even more than you realize. For are you not being similar to the girl trying to fix the bad boy. Are you trying to fix somethign as well Hmmmm.........
Hey anyone got some duct tape and super glue I can borrow I saw some more things I need to fix on myself as well today lol :>) If you can not make fun of yourself who can you make fun of hehe | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/29/2009 7:42:33 PM | you know with everything ive read so far on this topic im more lost than normal. girls say they want this that the other and everything inbetween. but that doesnt mean that they know what they want. knowing and saying are two completly different things. anyway ive lived in 3 states in the past 4 yrs and it just seems like girls wanting nice men isnt "popular" nowa days. they wanna be the girls that have to eventually lock there emotions away bc they keep going out with guys they know good and well its not gonna work out with. and on that note i just dont get it. girls will get lied to, taken advantage of, beaten and put up with it and then complain about it, and still wind up crawling right back to the #@$holes. i mean im not one but i can be bc it seems to work alot better than being yourself. anyone got some real answers for us "nice guys"? | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/29/2009 8:58:51 PM |
they want whores
Negative. Let me fix that statement for you.
Men want nice girls in front of their friends and mother, freaks in the sack with THEM only.
Cheers. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/29/2009 9:02:54 PM | guys do not want nice girls in front of their friends, they want the hott girl to show off haha nice girl act is only for mom in guys eyes
but they dont really like the nice girls, it goes both ways lol | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/30/2009 7:58:58 AM | B.s. is what I don't want. Sure being unpredictable can be fun. Don't talk about your feelings at first true. When you get to know a person feelings should come out to be able to move on to the next phase of a relationship. Not knowing how the other person feels can kill a relationship too. Know that one first hand. We only get to go around this crazy mixed up world once so happy fishing eveery body and may we all find what we are looking for and be able to hold on to it. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/30/2009 8:06:16 AM | | I dated and feel in love what I thought was a nice guy and a gentleman. The open doors for you and hold your hand type of guy. He turned out to be not such a nice guy after all. Just a used me for what he could get out of me. Hope one day he realizes what he gave up. He now has to work 2 jobs to make it by as do I. I don't want a bad boy. Sure they are fun to look at the confidence thing but I will take respect and being treated right every day over what I have found in my life so far. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/30/2009 11:48:55 AM | | The answer to that question is no. First and for most girls don't know what they want, they have to be told what they want. What they want is confidence and pheromones that only the alpha male produces. So gentleman stop being pussies and start training to be alpha male. It's that simply. | |
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clito
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Joined: 4/6/2008
Msg: 398 | |
| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 5/31/2009 7:27:07 PM | Benchfluff has a point about "bad boys" Back in 1933, 75% of the people who voted for Adolf Hitler(The consummate "Bad Boy" were-WOMEN!). So, nice guys do indeed finish last! | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 6/1/2009 12:25:36 AM | I do not know what women you have been meeting, but I honistly sincerely do want a nice guy.
I thought I found him 16 years ago,and married him, were married 15 years,and in March 2009 he walked out on me said I WANT A DIVORCE , now I find out he was NOT SUCH A NICE GUY , he has been cheating on me for so long him and that other woman have 2 children together.
So what ever women you are meeting, I don't know. All I can do is speak the truth for myself. I have been so so so hurt by a man I thought was a nice guy just to find out he was not.
I loved him and trusted him,and all it got me was hurt, lots and lots of hurt.
Peggy | |
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