sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 76 | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/5/2005 10:47:18 AM | Hmm.
Girls and women, want a nice guy, but are inexorably drawn to the dark side. They are as much a slave to thier hormones as guys are, just the weaknesses are expressed differently than men.
Someone, a lady, said that what women desire are trustworthy men, and there aren't any. It points out a truism. Women do want a man that is honest and open with them as they mature. The problem is they don't trust him (having been burned by thier own previous choices.) So they test him. Unfortunately testing changes the fundamental nature of the relationship and sooner or later she is going to be dissapointed. Any dog will bite if you poke it enough.
Which brings us to the "open and honest" thing I keep seeing pop up. What a younger woman means by that is "tell me everything, but it's a one way street. Or, mostly one way." Girls think of that as normal. They don't see it as a head game. By the time they do, Darwin has given up, or saddled them with some interesting offspring. Rarely they are trying really hard to be an equal, but those are rarer than nice guys with perfect teeth and a bank account!
Bottom line, be true to yourself and wait for her to grow up. Sooner or later you will find her, but it's kinda like the lottery. If you don't buy a ticket, you can't win, but just because you bought a ticket doesn't mean you will. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/5/2005 10:55:12 AM | I assume they do
Those that don't I can tell ya in my opinion they are not in it for the relationship can't are playing games.
Same goes the other way around. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/5/2005 11:09:20 AM | I have always searched for a nice guy.. but had to wait a really really long time to find one.. I think I found a really nice guys.. hopefully he really is nice..
My advice.. keep searching many of us women out here looking for good decent guys..
good luck . | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/6/2005 10:58:16 PM | Hey Winston! We live in the same city and I am looking for a "nice guy". Unfortunately most guys who call themselves "nice guys" are everyone's doormat. Now if I could find a nice guy who has a spine, that would be a plus.  | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/7/2005 3:47:04 AM | I just meet someone and she told me that she wants to be with a nice guy. what a bunch of bull all she is doing now is blow me off are just call when she needs something. why is it that some weman can not just tell you the turth? I've made her more mad now that I am being a ass to her. she ask me where is that nice guy she meet told here he left I do not like being like this to weman but this is the only why you can get some of them to go out with you. iI hate it mabye I should just give up on the hole dating deal? can any of you nice weman help me out and tell me why this always happens?  | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/7/2005 12:47:52 PM | everyone's opinion of a nice guy is different!!i don't like 'wimpy-pushover-too ready to give-in,turtleneck-wearing,plays video-games,obsessive hand-washing,in bed by nine" kind of guys....gee..was that a little harsh?anyway that is my GENERALISATION of a nice guy, and they are pretty much doomed in the world of dating except for ex-nuns,librarians,and any woman with a crushing fear of large crowds.. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/7/2005 2:21:57 PM | never said I was that nice of a guy just sick of weman who can't be up front with you. When they tell you one thing and mean another. All I want is to meet someone who knows how to treat a man the right way. And think of him as a dog she can kick around are what ever she see's him as  | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/7/2005 2:32:53 PM | THATS DIFFERENT ENTIRELY..TREATING SOMEONE BADLY IS INEXCUSABLE IN ANY WAY...AND TRUST ME..THERE ARE LOOTTTS OF MEN WHO SPIN SOME GREAT LINES TOO....ITS A MATTER OF TASTE AND WHETHER AFTER YOU MEET UP IF THE PACKAGE IS WHAT YOU ARE TRULY LOOKING FOR..IF ITS NOT..YOU START COMING UP WITH LAME EXCUSES..LIES..AND ULTIMATELY TREATING THE PERSON BADLY BECAUSE THEY ARE "NICE AND YOU DONT WANT TO HURT THEM....NOTHING WRONG WITH NIICE GUYS, BUT NEVER LET A WOMAN PUT YOU DOWN OR DISRESPECT YOU BECAUSE YOUR PERSONALITY IS GENTLER AND KINDER THAN WHAT THEY ARE USED TO..YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE AND AT OUR AGE PERSONALITY IS WELL ESTABLISHED..HOPE YOU MEET A WOMAN WHO ACCEPTS YOU..PERIOD.. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/7/2005 3:38:16 PM | Hey Winston! I think attitude might be a boost for you! think positive, Im JustANiceGuy4U725
on the sister site of POF, and need someone to handle the mail in the mailroom. I think If you be a little more assertive without being down on yourself,I really dont know/or cant say as to what you say to the woman you talk to, Im rather cut up, joke, kid around, say nice things to the people I contact/or them to me! sell yourself/and tell them about their Qualitys, as living in Fla. is a different breed of cat! were you have to be able to sort out the players, from the real women, who are looking for a Nice Guy! hope this helps. George | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/8/2005 12:06:09 AM | Women have the ability to smell whether niceness is genuine or panty-seeking-behavior.
I've known literally dozens of "nice guys" who were only nice because they were terrified of everybody, and perhaps ten or so nice guys who were truly good people, and only about five of THEM were truly courageous and confident enough to be a good person while also not giving a shit what anybody else thought of them. Those were the ones I fell in love with.
If I had a dime for every guy who was sweet as honey to all the hot chicks and then turned around and behaved detestably to his employer, I would be a rich woman. News flash: if you treat your mom like gold and then say hateful things behind her back, you are not nice, you are merely a bully who's been sufficiently whipped that you can be considered domesticated. If you close your eyes when someone weak is victimized when you could have done something, you are not nice, you're just inoffensive -- to the evil people of this world as well as the good ones.
I think that there are quite a lot of women out there who, given the choice, would pick a man who was an honest **stard over a man who was sweet but simmering with resentment and fear beneath the surface. That's where the "women like jerks" idea comes from. Women just prefer a different kind of jerk.
The men who are genuinely good and confident are rare. I myself have never had a relationship with an ***hole, and I'm still friends with most of my exes. But I don't date much, because I'm terribly picky; I wait for true integrity, and I'm allergic to anything less because of my experiences. Which doesn't make me particularly virtuous. Just lucky. I was burned out on insincere nice guys at a very early age.
Just to be fair: the women who are genuinely good and confident are rare as well. I doubt in the strictest terms that I conform to my own standard; I indulge in fear and selfishness too often. All this proves is that life sucks. Be happy that we are shallow creatures, because if we truly went for what was good for us every single time, 90% of us would never get laid.
In the meantime, if you want to be a good person, decide to be one. Independent of your sex life, preferably. Anything that you decide to be on behalf of sex isn't going to be real anyway. *sheesh* | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/8/2005 2:44:56 AM | But Tony, sexuality can be nice, very nice, more so when with a 'nice' partner if they let themselves be themselves. It's a hang up that people have, I gather especially in the US, that showing one's sexual desire isn't the 'nice' thing to do.
Like for instance, there can be a real commotion over the slighest hint of sexual things on TV (not that we want porn), while at the same time people, including kids, are fed with a visual diet of blood and gore for hours on end. This dehumanizes people over what things mean and good and meaningful sex should be viewed as 'nice' though of course the act itself should be kept private.
I dunno, am i taking rubbish or what??  | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/8/2005 3:39:35 AM | zzzzzzippp,
If you close your eyes when someone weak is victimized when you could have done something, you are not nice, you're just inoffensive -- to the evil people of this world as well as the good ones.
Wrong, you would be offensive to the "good ones" and perhaps to the bad ones as well, who will see you as being a coward.
"Mourn not the dead. Rather mourn the apathetic throng, the cowed and meek, who see the world’s great anguish and it’s wrong but dare not speak." - author unknown. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/8/2005 3:54:48 PM | There are some of us that are still looking for that nice guy. For some reason they are extremely hard to find. On these types of sites you have to be careful....people will put down what they want you to hear (I'm talking about both females and males) because they have either been burnt in the past or they are not really looking and just want to see what will happen to make themselves feel good.
I hear ya....you just have to keep trying and not let it get to you. I know it can be frustrating sometimes. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/8/2005 5:43:55 PM | | mmmm.. you tell me where to find a nice guy and im there...cos nice guys are very hard to come by...cant find them anywhere these days,, | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 95 | |
| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/9/2005 7:52:40 PM | There are no nice guys anymore , you all killed them off during their teens and in their 20's , now it is our turn to kill all the nice girls off  | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/9/2005 8:11:59 PM | From my dating experience it's hard to find a nice, decent guy who also knows what it means to be loyal, faithful and not scared of commitment. It would be nice to settle down but it doesn't look like it's happening anytime soon!LOL There are nice guys out there but they are hard to find. | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 97 | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/10/2005 12:07:29 PM | | All women want nice guys. All men say that they are nice guys - that is until they hurt you or let you down, then they become not so nice guys. They say they're too nice and that no women want them and how much that they have been hurt, then they dump you, hurt you, don't return your phone calls or emails, call you for booty calls then ignore you. In short, they become bad guys. Women do this too, 'tis true, but nobody belongs in either one camp or the other. I have/am just going through this. The man I was with claimed that he had to stop being "so nice" because he kept getting hurt. I open my heart to him and he does the same thing to me. Go figure. | |
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| do any girls actually want nice guys?
Posted: 12/10/2005 1:33:32 PM | | my opinion , is they want nice guys, but i dont think thats what attracts them. for e.g. u open a door for a girl, tell her have a good day, just like every other guy.. so, u find ur own creative way to get noticed, then u can be nice, my technique is to just tease them, do or say somtihn to get that shocked look on their face and to show that u got balls and then u can be nice if u want, whatevers fun and whatever works! | |
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