| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/3/2008 9:04:16 PM | I would not agree with your statement. Being a woman.. I'm not a bad looking one.. Most of the men that I have met were interested in not so great intentions. It's not easy finding a guy that is a good person on here.. And a lot of times.. men do not read the profile that comes along.. they just look at the pics. On top of that... I'm sorry.. I do not respond to people that I have no interest in.. I get hate messages.
I wouldn't quite blame it on the women.. I would blame it on some of the men who message us. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/4/2008 2:10:22 AM | Rule of thumb for Internet Dating. The first person to make contact puts themselves in a vulnerable position and boosts the ego of the other. Therefore do not message any one you find attractive no matter how tempting. Dont give away your only bargaining chip . If you must, you may browse their profile only once. If they are like everyone else, they'll check out their Whos Viewed Me link and noticed that you viewed their profile. If they like your pick then they'll probably browse your profile and if they like what they read they might message you. And if that happens the ball is in your court. If it does not, then be thankful because she just saved you alot of time and energy. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/4/2008 2:35:35 AM | DevilTherry
If they are like everyone else, they'll check out their Whos Viewed Me link and noticed that you viewed their profile. If they like your pick then they'll probably browse your profile and if they like what they read they might message you. And if that happens the ball is in your court. If it does not, then be thankful because she just saved you alot of time and energy.
LOL Good luck with that strategy. I do not even look at my "who's viewed me" link anymore because it is always completely maxed out with guys and it changes every 5 seconds. I am sure it is the same with most women here.
I do like to do the hunting and I do message guys but you better be pretty good with that ball you have in your court or you will lose your chance.
DevilTherry
The first person to make contact puts themselves in a vulnerable position and boosts the ego of the other.
Vulnerable? Really? How?
You can sit on your hands and wait because you are too afraid of being vulnerable and because you want to play your silly little "ball in court games" or you can be a man and go out there and put your ego on the line and look for a girl.
While you are playing your silly little waiting game the real men are out there catching the good fish. You will just get the left overs. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/4/2008 4:34:57 AM | Hey, I'll sum it up. This site and all other sites are just one small element of my "exposure marketing" program. If you are relying primarily on this or any other internet site and aren't getting out into the social scene often, your odds of success approximate those of playing the lottery. Take that back, the lottery probably has better odds. Personally, from all of my dates/relationships, TWO were from the internet, ALL others from boldly approaching women in public. Don't fear rejection, it fades away after a while. Know the locations: grocery store, yes it works; library, possible but timing is crucial; public parks, if you have a dog, odds double. Get the idea? Here's the riff - girls most active on the social scene aren't hanging out on a web site. But I do enjoy reading these forums ... :)
Always nice to see someone post who gets it...
Online dating is supposed to supplement your already full OFFline dating schedule. If you don't have a lot of offline dating going on, then you need to go and build it up so that you do. This place is only supposed to be a bonus, not the only thing you're doing. If it is, then yeah, duh - it's gonna suck for you.
Shy? Tough....don't like people? Too bad. Don't like going out alone or meeting people face to face? Sucks to be you. Those are some of the ways people meet and date....if you don't do those things, then you're dating circle will be smaller. End of story. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/4/2008 11:09:17 AM | | I dont think this is true as most men use internet dating sites to lure women into bed..so whos having the most luck with the one liners?Whoever heard of a genuine man on a dating site?It makes me laugh still when some women still believe there are genuine men on them. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/4/2008 11:12:03 AM | | I totally agree with you 100% I wrote a bunch too, and hardly ever get any replies. It pisses me off when a woman who is 5'2" wont date a guy like me who is 5'9" based on height. she tells me they have to be at least 6". now thats bullshit. personal preference doesnt have to be that damn important in that area. I am alot taller than she. It's true that the women to men ratio is very different with men being the majority and women small. I know girls that are about my range on the scale who get tons of emails from guys while i dont get that many on mine. I been on this site for couple years. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/4/2008 12:41:42 PM | Maybe not so good for the women...I've been talking to a lady that gets approx 200 messages a week. Going thru her email is very similar to guys browsing the matches...you arent going to write everyone you see. So I can understand not replying and dont take it personal.
What frustrates me is that just because of the sheer volume of messages received, they might gravitate to the flashy ads from guys really workin' it and overlook the real people. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/5/2008 2:15:02 PM | It's hard for me to believe that there are that many women on here that get 200 messages a week. There is just to much discontent among the men here. At least from what i see on these forums. I see anywhere from 10 to 15 or more men a day that say they never get answered. If that is true it's hard to believe that there is very many men who are getting anywhere on this site. But then again i have also noticed that there is a over abundance of men who give up to easy. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/5/2008 3:05:34 PM | "dont think this is true as most men use internet dating sites to lure women into bed..so whos having the most luck with the one liners?Whoever heard of a genuine man on a dating site?It makes me laugh still when some women still believe there are genuine men on them".
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Thats SO not true!!....there are still some genuine nice men in here but because we aren't attractive, we never get a chance to prove it :(:( | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/5/2008 3:24:19 PM | | I haven't read all 89 pages but I sure don't see how it sucks for guys, good for women. Not the case for me. I sure don't get 200 messages a week. In fact I consider it a good week if I get one. As far as making first contact, I don't have luck there either. Almost every (not ALL) message I have sent out has been read/deleted with no response. I'm not having a pity party or whining and complaining. Just stating the facts as they apply to me. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/5/2008 3:36:14 PM | Whoever heard of a genuine man on a dating site?It makes me laugh still when some women still believe there are genuine men on them".
Then laugh away there friend.
I am proud to say I am genuine! I also get about 10 e-mails a day on average. (70 a week)
I send out hello's that never get replied to. Simple compliments about great profile or beautiful pictures....
A lot of the time I will not get even a thank you from someone that I mail telling them that I have added them to my favs list...
That is why I try to reply to every e-mail I get!
I still sign on and off smiling... Every time!
Maybe it's because I am here having fun and not just whining about things...Hmmmm I wonder if thats what it is...hmmmmm | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/5/2008 3:49:58 PM |
10 e-mails a day on average
Damn rock, is that 10 a day new or repeat email customers from far away lands? There isn't 10 women in my local area much less 10 a day... | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/5/2008 6:24:08 PM |
Damn rock, is that 10 a day new or repeat email customers from far away lands? There isn't 10 women in my local area much less 10 a day...
Does it matter? None of them come as "current profile user"!
As I have said before. Staying up beat and having a positive out look at life can make all the difference.
You can be the old lonely guy that is always yelling at the neighborhood kids for playing ball in the street, always wondering why people never wave hello, or drop off extra cookie's. Getting sadder and sadder as the days go by. Dead for weeks before anyone notices. only to be found by a meter reader when they come to shut off your power.
Or you can be up-beat and have fun as often as possible! Being respectful and replying to mail helps too!
So RocK on if you can! | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/5/2008 6:42:12 PM | Isnt that the way its always been i mean men compete for a womans attention dont they just because we live in a more tech age doesnt mean that our selective processes are going to change with the times bottem line men have always chased women and prob always will and i wouldnt want that to change isnt the enough gender confusion already best of luck to you  | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/5/2008 7:21:06 PM | Oh for goodness sake!!! All you whiny men complaining about not getting emails returned - check who your writing and what your saying!!
Do you need a class? And if your sending out mass emails that say the same thing do you think we don't know? There is a really good thread called:
Online Dating Guide For Men: Part One and there is a part two as well.
Its in the dating and love advice forums (do a thread search with the above).
It has some excellent pointers for you to consider. And yes there is one for women as well. So whether you take the advice or not atleast read it before you continue to whine and complain.
I reply to almost every single email. If only to say thankyou. There are a few that don't deserve a thankyou and they get deleted and even blocked if necessary. But sometimes I really wonder what the heck!!!!!
If you can't take a little time to put some effort into what you write so that the girl will feel like she isn't on your mass emailing list and that your not just desperate for any response then don't whine when you don't get a response!!!  | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/5/2008 11:23:12 PM |
Posted By: jman66947 on 9/5/2008 6  12 PM .... Message: Isnt that the way its always been i mean men compete for a womans attention dont they ... bottem line men have always chased women and prob always will ...
I won't argue with men like this man who really believe that, if that is what their experience tells them, however I can say that I cannot agree with what this man says, based on my own experience.
When I was young and dumb I assumed I was supposed to chase women because "that's what men do." When I grew up I realized that you don't need to.
Surprise: When I gave up trying hard and "chasing," I found my life filled more than ever before with desirable females and healthy relationships.
Now I do just not compete for any woman's attention. If any woman chooses to give me attention as a free gift I accept it graciously, and if I give a woman my attention it is a free gift, not an attempt to get something from her or to bargain or compete.
There is a woman I gave been seeing for a while and I go out of my way to help her to meet other men. Instead of losing her I find this draws us closer together. I suppose she knows that I am on her side, and supporting her in being what she can be, not just what I think she should be. And she is certainly not regarded as a prize to be won in a contest but as a human being equal to me in rights and in dignity and deserving of respect. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/6/2008 5:02:59 AM |
It makes me laugh still when some women still believe there are genuine men on them.
So you come to POF to laugh at people making there way through life and accuse all men of being rutting pigs.How nice for you. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/6/2008 6:59:45 AM | Wow 200 emails ..or even 10??
I maybe get 1 a week if that, once the new user status has worn off things definitely slow down considerable, then again I didn't put the most flattering, sexy pictures on here either. After all I want the guy to know what I really on a day to day basis look like, that might have something to do with it.
By the way from some of the conversations I have had on here, if men are being accused of being pigs on here...so are women. Some of the stories I've been told made my jaw drop. | |
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| Iwomen just shallow
Posted: 9/6/2008 10:21:35 PM | | Most women are just shallow,all that matters is a guys looks thats it ,nothing more nothing less. women learn to judge everyone based on looks from a very young age they do not know any different. Even with a reasonably attractive pic they will scroll right by if you are not perfect. something else that is a joke is when they say they want a nice guy or a sweet guy ;what a bunch a bs that is, women have no problem getting treated like crap by a guy as long as he is cute ;and whats up with women looking for a badboy? I think a badboy is an unemployed loser with a drug problem. Why would a woman want that? I have yet to get a response from any women that I have initiated the first message even if I offer everything that they say they want? therefore I can only assume I am getting rejected based on my looks, yet out in public I am getting compliments on my physique all summer? | |
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| Iwomen just shallow
Posted: 9/7/2008 6:00:54 AM | The shallow goes both ways, too bad more don't realize that we all age and at some point looks will be done and gone.
Then again, who'd want to be with someone that is so hung up on looks and you'd constantly have to chase your youth.. a race you will loose sooner or later anyways. | |
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| Iwomen just shallow
Posted: 9/7/2008 10:41:17 AM | | Ya I know not all women are like that I am just getting tired of the "game"it is becoming somewhat frusterating! | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 9/7/2008 7:02:27 PM | | OMG what a bunch of BULL. First of all you OOOZE bitterness. People can smell that a mile away. It's repellent. But the most moronic aspect of your post is you forbid anyone to give you the alternate experience by saying "and don't tell me".. What are you afraid of? Truth is, it's WORSE for us women. OMG did I DARE say that? Let's face it, not only do we face the same basic rejection but ad to that the fact that SO many men want perfect Barbies (even when they themselves look like Jabba the Hut) or they're middle aged men in denial who think they should be dating 20 year olds. If you aren't strong enough a person to face rejection on the net then don't bring your baggage and lack of self esteem and dump it on us. You call yourself "good looking" but that's subjective in both gender cases. Be a man, grow some testicular fortitude and realize that it works both ways. Boo hoo.. poor you..... | |
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