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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 2/24/2007 7:41:51 PM | | wow, I'm 32 and I've dated 42, 40, and 46. I find older women better, due to communication. They're a lot more mature, seek intimacy not security. I've had the best relationships with women olderthan I. These women all look very good. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 2/25/2007 3:39:48 AM | | I keep hearing this but I don't think it's true. Women in certain categories have a greater chance of being struck by lightening than finding a man (so the papers tell us).....which means POF can be an interesting experience for women as well. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 2/25/2007 7:32:39 AM | Very true what Eborys says....I think its a shame that majority of girls are superficial these days, but I still think there are good ones out there.
I once did an experiment and created an elaborate profile with all the interesting things that would attract any woman to someone, but intentionally placed an average pic and did the same with a shallow description of a profile and a hot pic....guess what happened, YEP, the hot pic and shallow profile obviously got the attention. Overall though, I believe that sometimes the whole package is hard to come by, the so called 'hot' guys will usually have a deficiency in other aspects of their lives, and the average ones usually compensate for their averageness by being exceptional in their personality. Women, choose wisely....there's more to everything than meets the eye. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 2/25/2007 10:55:53 AM | | Personally, I do happen to agree with some of the points you have said but beauty in the eye of the beholder seems to me that the beholder is someone who is looking for false "qualities" do to how society in the whole portrays that guy with washboard abs and such are the "only accepted" by 99.9% of women and that really burns my ass when you say that. Now, with that said there are the women that would rather have someone that looks less attractive and may have "some" fat but that still does no justice as that they still would prefer the "perfect bodied" man. Show me one woman that goes for the non-appearance of a man and goes for the other qualities that the guy has to offer. | |
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mar814
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Joined: 11/16/2006
Msg: 205 | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/15/2007 12:40:00 AM | | I can't agree with internet dating sucks for guys. In "real" dating, you go to a nightclub, ask a girl if you can buy them a drink, and get rejected. On a lucky night, the girl may be gracious enough to give you a reason as to why she has rejected you. Internet dating is the coolest! You have the opportunity of girls from other CONTINENTS rejecting you!!!!!!!!! Something I'm sure you wouldn't want to pass up!!!!!! | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/15/2007 6:17:12 AM | yeah its so easy being a girl..
a lot of guys come on here.. with their di*ks in their hands, fingers on the button and think "hey ill send this email and the work is done ill get laid.."
they lie.. they say what u want to hear.. just in the effort to get laid..
they judge a woman by her looks and not her heart and mind.. but we take the time to get to know u..
and then the guy in the candy store that the internet represents.. gets all excited coz he gets another reply. or someone .. sent him an email!! or there was someone else on his list that seemmmmed okkkk!!! his mind explodes with the possibilities and cant help himself to go back in the candy store.. coz well he hasn't sampled that candy..
finding a decent honest guy on the net who is willing to give.. ONE girl a go.. is hard put i tell ya.. i think im just an average gal and there is plenty of guys around.. u think that makes me lucky.. i think that just makes me a girl who is gonna find a lot of rotton apples before i get to one good one..
but seriously.. those rotton apples start to make u weary..
... | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/15/2007 6:53:36 AM | I have sat here on a Sunday morning reading this forum and the more I read, the angrier I have bcome; that is until I read your reply. I have often described internet dating as a 'bigger' bar scene and if men think it's exciting to be bombarded by emails and then bashed because we don't sit and answer every single one..please think again!!
Internet dating is very time consuming; and especially for the middle aged person who is balancing, job, family, home, friends, finances etc...this becomes more like 'work' than 'play'.
I have been on this site for a year, have met quite a few men that nothing developed beyond friendship, dated a few and found that we weren't compatible in the 'real' sense, and have been more interested in some who weren't interested in me. You do learn to develop skills in how to handle other people's emotions as well as your own.
Men are visual; women know that and we shouldn't be penalized for posting a picture that plays on a man's natural instinct to 'look'...I have dealt with everyone sincerely and tried to be sensitive to their feelings; while at the same time being honest with myself as to what I need in a significant other person.
We can't 'suck and blow' at the same time; so it is important to decide that if you are on here that you approach it with some intelligence and roll with the punches. It shouldn't be difficult to understand that men and women on here have many other things going on in their lives that are far removed from their dating life.
It's time we cut each other some slack and carry on with it; or leave it altogether. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/15/2007 12:19:00 PM | | I actually think it can go both ways. I think the internet has opened doors for both men and women to date. I don't think it actually reflects any different for either gender. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/15/2007 3:00:46 PM | | Dude...we don't all judge by a photo but u need to have one...otherwise it seams like u r hiding something...thats cheating to use someone elses photo...thats not an experiment it's a game...if u can't b honest with yourself...u wont receive honesty from anyone else...****in will just make it harder for u...accept that not all women will like u...mayb the one u r serching for hasn't come around yet...i am not superficial...just looking for someone who stands out to me...and further more i have found that a lot of the guys (not all) r looking for a woman with a great bod, beauty, and love all the sport things they do(hockey,golf,cars,fishing,hunting )etc...go figure!! I really don't care about how many emails or fav's...i'm just looking for one . | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/15/2007 3:21:15 PM | good for woman? are you serious.... i dont get resposes....i get ignored too. i have had 57 view me within the week an not one sent a message or is interested...that says alot huh? goes to show you how superficial some can be...what a boring life. beauty comes from within ....an it shines to the outside of us. most miss the importance of what makes the beauty....is "the soul".
its no different with us, so called average woman. it seems if were not a size three or long blonde hair...then were out...but to me thats ok... i have a good life an i am a pretty lady with class and values....and i wont settle for less because i deserve better in life.
photo ??? ...most will judge by the picture an keep walking anyways. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/15/2007 4:48:14 PM | We have accepted a number of changes in our society that have upset the ratio so much. In traditional society, when a girl reached the age of perhaps fourteen or fifteen, her father began looking for a suitable husband for her. In colonial days, a woman who reached 22 without being married was considered an old maid. Marriage was for life, rather than the current 3-5 year trend of modern times.
The reasons for this were simple, women are only able to bare children for about 14-35, give or take, while men are able to both support a family and have children from about 20-45.
Moreover, the modern diet (especially the American diet) leaves us fatter than we ever have been, and women are both more susceptible to weight gain and to discrimination based on appearance. Men do not tolerate extra weight on a prospective gf the way women do.
In more recent years, sexual harassment suits have made the workplace an unacceptable place to look for a significant other. Two thirds of all married couples once met around work, and that has become more difficult nowadays. The divorce laws and culture (as well as the divorce industry) have made keeping a marriage going even more difficult. In modern society, taxes, high interest rates, and the high cost of living have made it difficult for one income earner to support a household.
It's getting tougher for women, but it's almost impossible for men. American men have a comparatively easy time finding a girlfriend, or even a wife, in a foreign country, even when there just on holiday. Western countries, and America especially, have become very anti-family. Our cultures have become based on an expectation of exploitation. Whenever I speak with anyone, the immediate presumption is that I am try to exploit and victimize them somehow, and no one seems to feel any sense of shame or wrong for suggesting it. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/15/2007 11:27:16 PM | I know my last contribution to this thread seams a little flippant, and I apologise.
But here is the real skinny on my thoughs of this topic. I moan about how hard it is to find women, but guys, c'mon! How many of us actually have thought about the circumstances that the other team finds a tad irksome?
Sure, there are some stunners posted on this site, and a lot of guys can't control their physiological urges.This is where problems start. Correct me if I'm wrong, but some typical comments from guys would be "Nice set of titties", or "We should have sex" and so forth. My guess is that women feel uncomfortable because they are always being propositioned.
Another problem is there are some guys that don't know the meaning of NO. I can see how this can annoy women, when one guy won't leave them alone.
Because men are visual beings, we tend to judge women on looks (this is a generalisations, I know there are exeptions to the rule). Men will generally look at the picture and will hit the message button quicker than they can say CONDOM, without looking at the vital pieces of info. If a girl is only looking for guys up to the age of 24, and hundreds of thirtysomething men keep on contacting her-, I can see why she will be pissed.
Yes, there are reasons that internet dating is difficult for men, but it's equally as difficult for women. | |
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dpd22
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Joined: 11/9/2006
Msg: 216 | |
| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/16/2007 9:20:07 AM | Internet Dating can be bad for both men and women for different reasons.
For men, the bottom line is supply and demand. There are about 8-10 men for every woman. Both some men and women can be shallow and superficial, but some women can become more selective because of the ratio. If an average looking woman receives a lot of emails, then that could raise her ego and she becomes more picky.
For women, she might receive a lot of emails, but some of them are vulgar, some of them are poorly written, some of them are from men with a poor profile, some of them are from men that clearly don't match what she is looking for ( i.e. the man is a smoker and she prefers a non-smoker ) etc | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/16/2007 10:49:58 AM | | ok men! you may complain that you get no reply from women but trust me after you have gotten 15 replies of nothing but cheap sleezy sex offerings then you would rather they not say anything instead. trust me....you hear 15 guys descrie in detail what they got danglin...then you can ****! | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 4/16/2007 1:47:51 PM | I have been doing this online dating gig for about a year and a half now, and have talked to a lot of guys about their experiences, and the numbers I throw out most have agreed with.
For every 20-25 women you contact, you will probably receive 1 response. For every 100 women that you contact, you will probably get 1 date. For every 4-5 dates you go on, you might get lucky and go out on a second date.
Your right, the women for the most part, have it much easier than the guys. And I suspect your right, womens expectations are way out of line. I suspect this because of the number of good looking women that I have seen on personals time and time again. When I contact them, their response is the same, that guys think women are a dime a dozen, they only want sex, even the nich ones are corrupted. I believe they are only going out with a very small percentage of men who are the cream of the crop, and not us average guys. Read a book by Covey and Stephens called "Freakonomics." There is a section on internet dating.......very interesting. Some excerpts............
57% of men who post a profile don't even get one e-mail, 23% of women.
Women underestimate their weight by 20 pounds, men overestimate their income by 20%
Men who say they are looking for a long term relationship do better than those who are only looking for dating.
For men, looks of a woman are paramount, for women, income. The higher a mans income, the more e-mails he gets.
The woman who has a headful of blonde hair stands as good a chance of getting a date as a college educated women.
Read the book, thereis plenty more about the internet datign world. But don't get discuraged. 10-15 e-mails sent is NOTHING.
Good Luck! | |
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crw39
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Joined: 4/28/2007
Msg: 219 | |
| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 5/6/2007 7:49:14 AM | Well I am not sure what kind of guys you have run into on here but we are not all like that. While I will admit that I need to be physically attracted to someone (doesn't have to be a Barbie doll, just attractive to me) I am just as interested in a woman's "heart and mind". I have met lot's of so called Barbie dolls that I wouldn't give the time of day to after getting to know them.
There are just as many if not more women playing that game as there are guys. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 5/6/2007 8:54:56 AM |
Even for a good looking, educated white guy like me, internet dating is a very humbling experience. Out of 10-15 e-mails I've sent so far, I've yet to receive a reply (AND I DO HAVE A GOOD PHOTO FOR MY PROFILE BY THE WAY). I know that's not that much but Christ, no replies from 15 e-mails has to tell you something. In real life I get a lot of looks and attention
Yes internet dateing is a very humbling experience and woman do get a lot of rejection as well ,once a womans established the fact she is not looking for an intimate encounter thats the kiss of death so to speak . I have sent emails myself and have not gotton replys maybe its because I'm not a 9 or 10? ;) You say you get lots of attention in Real life? maybe its your peronality? other wise you'd have met and kept someone and not needed be on a dateing site.
The good looking girls on this site, especially from my area are very stuck up and they only reply to you if you are 9+ out of 10 in a scale of attractiveness, no exaggeration. Its like online a guys' level of attractiveness takes a dramatic drop due to all the competition and other crap, so its about 100 times more difficult to find someone. It sucks for guys, plain and simple. And dont come and tell me that its the same for women too because that is bull sh it.
hmm maybe the fact your judgeing attractiveness may have an effect on your outcome of course the divas are able too pick and choose from 100's of men,.the thing is they pick the guys that are like them. Your being picky and only wanting a so called 9 or 10 woman in appearance. Hmm heres a thought try reading the profiles instead of looking at the pics then email woman that think about more then getting her nails done or buying out Mary K. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 5/6/2007 9:04:46 AM | | This is why you cannot rely solely on internet dating. Use it as a supplement to looking for someone in the real world. Looking in the real world is what will improve your social skills and will enable you to use all of your qualities, not just a pic and a few words. | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 5/6/2007 9:37:29 AM | "WAAAAAH WAAAAHHH!!!!!"
"Girls only care about looks on an internet dating site!!!!"
Oh no!
I love it how guys complain about good looking women not having to do much work on here...DUH!!! (most guys are wired way more visually than women ever could imagine, btw)
I have sent out over 30 emails, with very very few responses - I have been single for the last TWELVE YEARS, with an insignificant break or two in between(two week relationship with a girl from England when I was 24 - I am now 30)...and you know what? I'm a happy person who is comfortable with myself - now more than ever - I know what I want, and know who I am.
I am confident that after maybe 1,000 emails, I might possibly have a chance with a girl I really like - until then, I'll continue to me ME, and not let the fact that I'm single get in the way of that.
Eborys, you let this little bit of rejection damage your self esteem?? That might be the whole problem!
Sort it out, man!!!!!! | |
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| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 5/11/2007 11:58:57 PM | | Who are these women receiving 20 to 30 emails a day . I am lucky if i average 3 or 4 ,and most of them are stupid. They say nothing but hi or Wat u doin . I must of sent our about 10 messages in the past few days and i have received nothing back. Not even a thanks but no thanks ,which i always do . It is not only women who have an inflated view of themselves on here .By the way i soooo do not have an inflated view of myself.However it is funny to see the guys on here who constantly message the hotties . What makes them think a hottie would want them when they are soooo obviously not a hottie themselves.You date within your league and if you keep trying to date out of you league do not be surprised when someone who is way out of you league keeps turning you down.blackhawksfan that rant you just did will not help your case with women. It came off sounding extremely mysoginistic and full of yourself. You called women bitches ,sluts ,and idiots . Man release the anger . it is not hurting anyone but you. | |
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dpd22
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Joined: 11/9/2006
Msg: 225 | |
| Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women.
Posted: 5/12/2007 8:18:38 AM |
Who are these women receiving 20 to 30 emails a day . I am lucky if i average 3 or 4 ,and most of them are stupid. They say nothing but hi or Wat u doin . I must of sent our about 10 messages in the past few days and i have received nothing back. Not even a thanks but no thanks ,which i always do . It is not only women who have an inflated view of themselves on here .By the way i soooo do not have an inflated view of myself.However it is funny to see the guys on here who constantly message the hotties . What makes them think a hottie would want them when they are soooo obviously not a hottie themselves.You date within your league and if you keep trying to date out of you league do not be surprised when someone who is way out of you league keeps turning you down
Many decent looking men here send decent emails to okay looking ( not great ) women that have some common interests and still get few responses. Apparently these women are looking for Mr Perfect when they aren't beauty queens either. Not all men only email random attractive women. | |
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