| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/9/2005 2:59:10 PM | | I have the same problem but mine lies in the fact that I have more than one mother of my children.I think that scares most women because they believe that I was the cause of my relationships not working.As in any relationship it takes two to make it work or two to have it fail.The fact that im in my early thirties with four kids and no desire to have any more also seems to be a turn off.I can relate to women who have no children and why they dont see much of a future with me being i dont want and cant afford any more.As far as women who already have children the fact that they have some of there own helps a little but sometimes they still run for the hill.side note many people believe that a black man like myself is automaticly inclined to abandon his children shortly after conception not true but neither are most of societys steriotypes | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/9/2005 8:08:37 PM | I'm with you there shan,the last lady I had the oppertunity or should I say curse of dating,well anyway she is a 30 yr old 1st divorce, the guy treated her badly I could tell,anyway things went well for about a month emails and all then came time to meet,she was and is a decent person don't get me wrong ,but wow..as time went on..like within a month or so it all comes to the surface..you see she is a social worker by prof. so she knows exactly how things should be you know..and in trying to make conv.with her she would constantly love to slam me on every aspect of my life..to not spending enogh time with my kids to saying I expect too much from her...hint I only saw her once a week or maybe once every two..which she is a busy lady so you deal with it you know..then she comes up with this you treat me all wrong and stuff....so tell me somthing how do you treat someone who slams you at every oppertunity? well I said things won't work out but still wanted to be friends you know..geuss that just threw the ball in her court because if downgrading a guy for everything he does in his life and saying he's not a good father to his kids and only thinks of himself even though she has no idea of what it is even like to be a parent as she has no children....well I'd have to give her an A+ in slamdancing...now you see what I mean about finding a decent lady yeah right where did they all go
HHmm sorry I geuss this one turned into more of a **** session than a post...I feel better now that I got that off my back though so next time I'll do better | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/9/2005 9:21:59 PM | | I would have to agree. Any single woman that doesn't have children is gone the moment she finds out about yours. I am up to number 6 this year. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/9/2005 9:36:16 PM | Does it really matter whether the woman has children or not doc2rn? I honestly felt that as a single parent, dating another single parent was a big no no. I'm sure that sounds hypocritical of me, but the "meshing/blending" of 2 families just seemed so difficult to comprehend. So I stuck with dating single/childless men.
The person that I 'm currently seeing has 2 children. Now THAT blew me away! The universe plays surprise tricks sometimes lol....I'm learning alot......
Having said that, I think that if a woman is prone to run, she'll do so regardless of whether you have a child or not....JMO | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/9/2005 10:35:37 PM | I think that if a woman is prone to run, she'll do so regardless of whether you have a child or not....JMO
i totally agree ch. if they are going to run,they will run regardless
ecb | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/10/2005 10:25:20 AM | I agree Eastcoast. You might think it's because of your kids but it might be something else altogether.
It's definitely harder when both parties have children. Finding time just to see each other can be a struggle. Having said that, I would prefer a man who has children. They understand the demands of kids in a way a childless man can't.
The trick, I think, is not to have any pre-conceived ideas on a person because of their status as parents/non-parents. In the end, it's about the two of you and do you want to be together enough to work through the difficulties.
I have a childless friend who recently hooked up with a man with a teenager. Talk about jumping in at the deep end! It's going well so far because they really feel they're meant to be together and are working through the issues (and there have been a few) as they come up. That's what mature people are supposed to be able to do. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/11/2005 8:25:25 PM | I just want to throw my hat in the ring and say that Single dads ROCK. I applaude them loudly   I wish that there were more men like you out there rather than the immature ones that dont know how to own up to their responsibilities. I am a single mom and I find single dads not only very valiant...but very sexy too!!!  . If there are any single dads out there who wanna get in touch with me....well I'd love to hear from you all. Take care and rock on!!!!  | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/13/2005 9:43:54 AM | Delited, you said:
"If there are any single dads out there who wanna get in touch with me....well I'd love to hear from you all."
Here I am, but alas, we're 2000 miles apart. story of my life............
Capt | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/13/2005 5:50:34 PM | | Have run into this problem a few times and all I can say is NOBODY but NOBODY will ever stand in the way between me and my sons. Even if I have to sacrifice my own happiness for the sake of theirs. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/13/2005 6:52:01 PM | | I agree with the ladies. Guys with kids are a turn on....but my experience has been tha guys run away from a single mom, thinking that she is looking for a sugar daddy. It seems they don't even stick around to find out that you are secure, financially, emotionally, and ready for a relationship that doesn't involve a man taking care of us. Sucks kinda | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/14/2005 12:12:55 PM | "NOBODY but NOBODY will ever stand in the way between me and my sons"...........
DITTOS TO THAT, MY FRIEND. I have a son and daughter (both in highschool) and a younger daughter who lives with her mother in another state. I have not yet met a woman who is willing to accept that my kids are the top priority in my life. My kids are a major part of who I am. Reject them, and you reject me.
Capt | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/14/2005 1:54:30 PM | Being sa single mom myself I actually look for the single dads out there. I have had my heart broke too often from men that dont want a kid hanging out on a date. Sometimes, it's either take the kid or no date. Personally, I think a date with the kids right off to be good. That way everyone is up front with each other it actaully makes for a more relaxed evening when you dont have to worry about the kids. Good luck to all the single dads out there. and single moms too. My heart goes out to all of you.  | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/14/2005 3:03:35 PM | | pretty closed minded women you are meeting.considering how many single moms are out there.I just treat them like they are all mine.Kids are the best! | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/14/2005 3:35:28 PM | | Ok guys...it's not just women that freak when their potntial partner has kids...guys do it too (and more often) I think it is really awesome to find men that put their children above dating. To all you single dads... I applaud you. Keep your head up. There is a girl out there somewhere that is worthy of your affection. Your not just chosing a mate for yourself, so be chosey, don't settle...you and your kid(s) deserve some one that will accept you as a whole. I don't intend to make that mistake again...my kids are my number one priority...and if a man can't see the importance of family, then he is not worth my time or energy. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/14/2005 10:21:02 PM | | As a man who has raised two boys alone I have had women who seemed very interested in me until I mentioned that I have to boys. Had a few tell me outright that they did not know how they felt about it. Others seemed to run for the hills. After a few years of this I gave up and did not look. Did not have time anyway as I never would have left them with a sitter while I went out. Now they are grown and on their own. I don't have any regrets | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/15/2005 1:36:21 AM | okay here it goes ... am mother of 5 .. yes five ... as soon as i say that all i see is a dust of clouds ...they dont even wait to hear that 4 of them live with dad ( do to circumstances beyond my control to personal really ) anyways gone they are ... not waiting to hear that the one that is with me is 21 and living on her own ...
then i am sorry to say the single fathers in my age ( 37 -40) still look for barbie ... at least thats my experience ... as soon as the see that a woman is more mature be that in age or otherwise they gone ... and a woman that has had kids and does not have barbie figure ... well hell no we wont touch that ... sometimes its the fact having kids too that turns them off ...
my experience in general ...
soulless | |
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~Ames~
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Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 368 | |
| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/15/2005 7:43:11 AM | I am 28 and I have no children. I am currently involved with a wonderful guy that I met off of here. He has two young children (three and five). He is basically a full time dad, with a full time job, he busts his ass for them. When we make plans to do anything, it always includes the kids, and that is okay.
I have grown really fond of them, and I look forward to spending time with him as well as the kids. I was unsure if I ever wanted to have children myself, and I am learning so much from those kids. You can really tell alot about someone from the way they interact with their children. This guy is the most selfless and giving person I have probably ever meet in my entire life. I was a little leary about the children at first, but now that I have him and the kids in my life, I realize how lucky I am and how stupid it would have been for me to pass him by just because he is a responsible father, not mention a REAL man for taking every nec. action for his children.
It has been a BIG change from any relationship I have been in, I can't just strip down naked when I walk in the door, I can't do some of the romantic things that I would love to do for him to let him know how crazy I am about him, but it makes the alone time we do have together all that much better....
I think anyone getting involved with children need to go into the relationship at 100% because there are so many feelings involved, and you really have to learn to share that person you are with, and no matter what...the kids ALWAYS come first. Feelings are put on hold sometimes, but that is the way someone dealing with children has to be, selfless....it is worth it though. Seeing him happy with the kids, makes me so happy...it is truly awesome. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/17/2005 8:56:32 PM | | im a single dad of two wonderfull kids .i wouldnt traid them for the world.its just hard to find any one that wants to go out with a man with kids . especialy here in my town. i dont know what is rong with a man takeing care of his kids they are my babys.im looking for a woman to share my hart as well as my sole ..... | |
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romac
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Joined: 8/5/2005
Msg: 371 | |
| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/18/2005 7:34:09 AM | I'm a single dad as well, father to an engergetic li'l three year old boy. I haven't had any problems to date, knock on wood. However, I'm the type of guy that probably wouldn't be attracted to a woman that didn't like/want/have kids. I'm still a newbie though.
I think this is a great forum, interesting personal experiences and valuable informative feedback!  | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/18/2005 1:03:00 PM | | To just put my two cents into this topic....I just wanted to say that personally, I don't have a problem dating single fathers. I mean yes, at times it can get a little complicated with the visitaion sched's and such, but honestly, I'd rather date someone that has kid/kids than someone who didn't. I wish those single fathers that have posted in here the best of luck! | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/18/2005 4:39:13 PM | Ill throw my hat in this ring too
I have my kids and thankful they are adjusted well (luckily they are also old enough to be semi-independant which makes it easier)
Ive met women from both sides of this--those that run and those that are cool with it.
I approach this like I approach life, if its meant to be , then itll be, if not, Im not going to lose sleep over it.
Really, any woman who doesnt want a man because he has shown his responsibilities and compassion to the most important people in his life, arent really worth it are they?
This works for both genders | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/18/2005 5:04:31 PM | This is a great forum to read and speaks volumes of the reality of being a single aprent in todays world. I am a single dad so I know exactly what every body is saying. I have had some great girlfriend who are awsome people. It is hard to have ill words for them or disrespect. You have to have respect for peoples views of yourself and your situation. You dont like me because of my girls too bad for you What I have an issue with is the people that try to tell themselves that everything will be fine, and they tell you the same. Then 8 months down the road they say shit I cant do this I cant be held back by kids. Thats fine and dandy but maybe that should have been thought of befor a relationship gets to that stage. There thats my two cents.
Oh and I am single and looking for new things in life....just thought Id put that in too!!!! | |
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geohat
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Joined: 7/13/2005
Msg: 375 | |
| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 8/18/2005 5:30:37 PM | Awesome forum subject and I give KUDO'S to all SINGLE PARENTS! I have been a full time single daddy now for five years. I have 2 ex-girlfriends that didnt have kids nor want their own kids ever! However, they treated my son very special and it was great. We went on trips, amusement parks, the works! We are a complete package, and if any female doesnt understand that, she can kick rocks! I would rather it be harder to find a date being a single parent than dating someone who doesnt understand I come as a complete package.
I do understand why peeps do not want to date single parents, thats fine with me as obviously they are not right for us and I will not settle and either should you! I wouldnt mind dating a single mom, but if she had several kids, I wouldnt be interested at all. If a female has 3 kids and 3 different dads, i wouldnt date her. Why? | |
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