| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 1/27/2009 3:47:24 AM | I'm a single father of two fantastic boys,the youngest who lives with me full time,the oldest who is supposed to live at his mum's but preferrs it much more at mine,less hassle apparently,and I'd love to think I could eventually find that someone special who maybe has kids of her own,but when it all boils down to it my kids come first,as they should I think,and I get all the love and effection I need of them,just be nice to be able to share it with someone sometimes....any offers.  | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 1/27/2009 2:10:06 PM | I wish I could find a man in my area who didn't mind me having kids! Like another posted on here, I'm 44 but have a 14 and 5 year old. I'm not looking for a father, both kids are very involved with their own dads, just someone for ME!
Most men my age or older don't want a 5 year old around and I never hear from them again (even though I only have him during the week -he's with his dad every weekend) and the ones younger than me don't want an instant family around.
Sure makes it hard to find someone special at times but I keep faith and keep trying.
Nim | |
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hoobie
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Joined: 7/16/2006
Msg: 653 | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 1/31/2009 9:52:28 AM | | I have problems with meeting women ok with the fact I have more daughter as much as possible. Also her mom and I are close friends and try to raise her together as parents should. Other women either want to come in and take over or complain about how much time I have her. Then on the other hand they have their kids around all the time which I am way more than cool with, but aren't willing to do same they would ask of me. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/10/2009 2:25:49 PM | I myself perfer men with children. It is better to date men with children as well because they can relate to your lifestyle and they understand the importance of spending time with them as much as you can. My children are very important to me and I am looking for someone who shares this view as well. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/10/2009 2:33:02 PM | | I don't have a preference! I'd date a man with a child just as readily as i'd date one without. I do however find that single fathers have a lot more time constraints and are a lot less willing to hire a sitter, so the time we have is severly restricted unless I want to spend every night at his place, watching movies. It's funny huh? This is the complaint you usually hear from childfree people trying to date a parent. I just suck it up and beg neighbors. Like I'll watch yours if you watch mine kinda deal. I don't fault these men for spending time with thier children. I admire that in a single father. But in a relationship the other person has to feel like they are #1 sometimes to and if you are always being put of by, no sorry can't get a sitter, you wont' feel that way for long. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/16/2009 7:34:20 PM | | I, too, am a single parent with an 11 year old. I find myself wishing i had someone to consult with questions (especially boy stuff) or share the joys and accomplishments (like straight A's, red belts, and awards). You are attractive and honest, I cannot see a problem. You sure caught my eye:) | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/17/2009 10:05:25 AM | I THINK THAT ITS GREAT THAT YOUAND YOUR EX ARE ABLE TO COMMUNICATE, AND RAISE YOUR DAUGHTER TOGETHER, SHAME ON THE WOMEN WHO HAVE COME ALONG,TRYING TO TAKE OVER,OR FEEL SO INSECURE THAT THEY BECOME JEALOUS OF THAT.
I WISH THAT MY EX WAS MORE INVOLVED WITH OUR KIDS, NOT JUST FINANCIALY,BUT EMOTIONALLY.
I WISH YOU WELL, AND DONT LOOSE FAITH, SOMEONE WILL COME ALONG THAT IS JUST RIGHT FOR ALL OF YOU..!!  | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/17/2009 12:58:26 PM | Thanks people. Ive been on my own with my daughter for 6 yrs now and have only recently started considering the concept of dating again. Not had any luck and was starting to think that it was because I'm a single father. But anyone who considers my daughter as baggage isnt worth s..t in my book anyway. Reading through the postings has helped me realise that not all women share the same view. So instead of giving up I'll stick it out for a wee while and hope for the best.
Thanks All. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/17/2009 1:53:12 PM | | It all depends on the woman. I'm a single woman and I have 2 children, and I don't mind a man with kids, however I would have limitations in terms of how many he has and by how many different women. And the same should apply to women with children when it comes to the men who date them. If we all stick to our standards, we wouldn't waste so much time. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/17/2009 10:13:23 PM | | I am a single woman with no children of my own. I have no problem dating a guy that has children. I think that it's a good sign to know that the man you are dating is responsible enough to take care of himself and his children. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/22/2009 8:26:48 AM | Having kids could forsure be that deal breaker for many guys. I come right out and upfront letting them know I have 5 kids. That saves alot of running around meeting people if they are not into that. There is a good chance you'll meet someone with kids of her own and that just makes it all that much easier.
Proudly state it and kiss 'em off quick if they give you any greif about it. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/23/2009 4:39:01 PM | | I only date single dads! Men with no kids don't get the love I have for my daughter and don't get that she is always #1... | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 2/23/2009 4:49:50 PM | I'm dating a man with a child...and I'm not loving it. I've never met her, I'm sure she's a lovely girl, and I get that she has to be his priority, just like my children are mine.
My problem with the situation is that he has her 50% of the time, and he's so protective of her (and possibly afraid of his ex wife finding out he's dating), that I rarely talk to him when he has her. If he happens to leave the office early before she gets home, I'll get a phone call. I may get a text or two. But, for the most part, I'm in an every other week relationship, and it's taking a toll on me, and there's no way it's going to last unless something changes.
I guess my point is...I have no problem with the idea of dating another single parent, but we have to be on the same page about what we can realistically give. I'm not interested in meshing families, but I'm childless on the weekends, I don't mind getting a babysitter during the week, I'm not terrified of my kids hearing me talk on the phone if they wake up in the middle of the night...
I need someone that's on the same page as I am or our relationship can't meet both of our needs. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 3/6/2009 8:17:52 PM | | I'm a single dad very involved with my children, I would not want either person's children to meet the "significant other" until it was very clear that the relationship has a good chance of being a long-term relationship. Otherwise you can end up bringing a lot of pain and confusion into your children's lives. I would not consider that self-centered or selfish. Consider their reason for not wanting the kiddos along. I agree that with some men it is for selfish reasons. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 3/8/2009 12:34:16 AM | | I am a single dad also,and have wondered about this also.I myself have kids with a mother that walked out on us all.and took a pretty big fight to finally get her on the same page as to what was really important for them.we now get along really good.she is re-married and is involved in the kids lives.but I am kinda reluctant to get anyone involved with them to much because of abandonment issues left over from their mom.and unless someone is going to be around for awhile there really is no reason unless the kids think it's only as friends.that way the kids don't get confused or hurt if that person is not there anymore.I have personally experienced this and it hurts to hear them say I miss so-n-so when it didn't work out and they don't understand.if you are going to be there more than a month or two.I think it's ok because a relationship is not going to go anywhere with alot of absence.JMO,but you got to show up for it. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 5/9/2009 7:57:07 AM |  It's refreshing 2 hear your oppinion as i'd almost given up on the hole dating game , obviously my kid's are no1, but just latley there's been that something missing , mabee you could help me ? | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 5/9/2009 1:14:00 PM | "... as soon as they 'find out' I have kids ..."
If you have kids, don't you have to disclose that fact in your profile in the first place?
I think we all should, because whether you have kids or not is one of the basic elements we should disclose in our profiles, such as Gender, Sexual Orientation, Age, Location, Race, etc.
Plus, we all have preferences. I would NOT call some women racist just because they prefer Hispanic males over White (like me). I also would NOT say that a woman, who woiuld not date a man over 30 (like me), is not open-minded or discriminating based on age.
By the same token, the preference on men without kids is a personal choice. I am sure there are lots of women out there who would not mind dating men with kids. You just have to keep looking to find a woman like that. Good luck. | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 5/9/2009 1:33:50 PM | | I have to tell you I posted on another forum that I don't date men with small children. I didn't explain this because it didn't call for it there.... I don't because I am overwhelmed enough without adding more. I think that you just have to look at where you are and know who you are and how much you can handle. If the girl split after finding out, she did you a favor. She didn't let you get your heart into it before she decided she really couldn't handle it. I have one child my girlfriend has 4. I can only stay at her house for short periods of time. I love them all, but I stress easily. I just know what I can and cannot handle in life. I know that I cannot be responsible for raising more than the one child I have. I already work six days a week to do that. I barely have time to myself, I don't like to leave him when I'm not working because I'm gone so much as it is. I also have to say I don't date men who make all outings without my Son. He is a big part of my life. You will find someone who can handle all of your children and do it wonderfully. Don't loose hope, there are alot more women out there in your situation who have found men who accept their children as the gifts that they are.; | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 5/9/2009 1:47:27 PM | I totally hear what you're saying. Once I mention I have a 13, 9, and 4 year old they run haha. It's almost funny in a sort of sad, pathetic way.
As far as single dads go, I would actually PREFER that they have kids of their own. What better way to understand my situation as a single parent than to be in the same boat right? | |
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| Do women mind single dads with kids
Posted: 5/9/2009 8:50:11 PM | On both sides of this coin (single fathers/mothers) you have to remember that it its a big part of who you (the parent) are/is also. I've never had children and dated a few men (widowers and divorsced) with 2 to 5 children. I backed of of the fewer kids not because of the children, but because of the relationbship that the father had with the children. If he neglics them, or puts himself first - then in time thats how he would treat me - or the women in his life - and years later I see that everytime I've been right. The same goes for women - I've seen friends through several divorces. Its more from what I see, than what I personally have experenced, having no children - and marring once in 2001 am presently months away from a final divorce decree (yea!!!  ) | |
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