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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?      Home login  
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 caretodream
Joined: 8/16/2005
Msg: 101
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...Page 5 of 22    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22)
@Jigsaw - I guess I have been a very lucky little girl, because the majority of the men I've met on and off of here, have been perfect gentlemen. I am a very positive person with a fair point of view; I guess that's what attracts the right kind of men. I get what I give.

Yes, there are some men on and off here that are just looking for sex, but so are some of the women. Why are you looking at it like there is a double standard? I try to look at things from both sides, and speak up for my sweet brothas. *cheers!*
 gioia
Joined: 11/10/2005
Msg: 102
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/3/2005 1:05:29 PM
WELL, this thread is getting BORING>>>>>>
It's fact, another member also stated this and he is a GUY.
IF a guy really truly cares AND I will add looking for longterm he will WAIT to have any kind of sexual activity for some time. And I am not talking like weeks either, months. I had waited for a few months and still got burned years ago by a guy but learned not to trust Words, Actions are what we all should be looking for here. People just don't respect others anymore. And guys, slamming the girl who started this post is UNCALLED for, she is young and fell for what many of us have in the past, A GOOD PLAYER.
Be kind instead of throwing comments that hurt into this thread.
Some of us are mothers. IF you had a friend who was a single mom OR a sister you would be pissed if she got treated like this. You would NOT sit back and say she is shallow and simply picks the wrong men come on now. You would go kick his ass and settle it like a man.
DONE unlike some on here i have things to do , this is getting boring
And to the girl who started this post, it's NOT your fault, grab a friend and go out for a coffee or shopping , its a new year in 06 so keep your head up high and don't fall for the players.
 gioia
Joined: 11/10/2005
Msg: 103
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/3/2005 1:07:50 PM
I have stated earlier that woman are players as well. MEN AND WOMEN should not be using each other.
Again i am done with this thread it's getting boring.
Later
 GreenIzz
Joined: 10/9/2005
Msg: 104
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/3/2005 1:09:07 PM
here it is..ok??the ultimate question....did ya f#$ck him????cuz if ya did..then there is your problem...he was nice cuz you were giving him instant gratification..and now that he has what he was looking for...you have become obsolete...sorry babe...it's happened to the best of us..you fall for the nice guy charms...but he was a wolf in sheeps clothing....always remember this.."there is often the look of an angel,even on the devil himself"..it'll help to keep your mind right
 Runz_With_Scissorz
Joined: 10/1/2005
Msg: 105
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/3/2005 1:11:21 PM
Ah, the single mom thing.

In the past year, the only girls to have approached me were single moms. They seem to be more likely to approach a guy than single girls would... and as cute as they were, I had to decline.

I have nothing against single mothers, and I DO want kids myself. But I want them to be MY kids. So, that said, dating single mothers is out of the question for me.

It makes me angry reading all these posts, with the women on here stating that all guys are the same (just out to get laid, they use girls, etc.) THAT is the attitude I am referring to.

As dream stated, You get what you give. And you don't sound like you even have the capability of giving anything positive with that negative "I hate men" attitude.

Not all guys are the same... as i am sure not all girls are the same. Still working on formulating an opinion on that one ;)

Runz_With_Scissorz does NOT shoplift the pootie!
 JDLeon
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 106
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/3/2005 1:28:09 PM
why do u reply everyone's post every a new post?

your action annoys me. probably thats why he ignore you. Don't nag a man, and give him some space and time.

Try not to call him 1 once every 3 day instead of 10 times a day. it would piss me off too if my phone rings non stop from the same person.
 MellyJelly82
Joined: 11/27/2005
Msg: 107
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/3/2005 5:05:47 PM
Guys just suck. I don't think alot of guys can handle a girl. Just remeber that guys mature alot SLOWER then we do. Maybe that is what the problem is....maybe.....Anyway, EVERY girl deserves a good guy and someday you will find that good guy, just don't settle for anyone. I hope I find a good guy too.

P.S. I just went throught the same thing you did.
 BlueRipples
Joined: 1/3/2005
Msg: 108
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/3/2005 5:27:20 PM
It's not your fault... Some people play games, tell you anything to win you over then toss you aside... It's not possible to know someone well enough in 1 month to really love them, anyone who would say that is probably immature or unstable... Get to know people over time, it's saves hurt feelings.
 crimson67
Joined: 12/8/2005
Msg: 109
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/27/2005 10:01:24 PM
Go by what the boy's actions say, not what he says.

Some guys will send the signals "This isn't working" because they feel its the easiest way to get the message across.

Lets face it, If your into someone and they tell you it just isn't working, It may take the whole day/week/month to hash through the emotions etc. Where a few well placed signals will have you working though the emotions and realizations by yourself.

They just don't have the maturity or the respect for themselves or others to put it out there verbally and help with the reprocussions.

Why's he saying stuff that may not be true? He thinks thats what you want to hear and Its the easiest way to get through the encounter.

P.S.: Some of us grow up. We really do. :P
 sweetashoney2975
Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 110
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/27/2005 10:18:04 PM
girl!! that should have been the first clue..he is an jackass and thats being nice.he doesnt love you and he doesnt respect you if he lets you sleep in a car im sorry but thats bullshi-
and just remember what comes around goes around.your a pretty girl and dont derserve that peice of crap.you deserve someone to bring you flowers and treat you like the queen you are
 birdy267
Joined: 11/8/2005
Msg: 111
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/27/2005 10:44:02 PM
Shauna, I'm really sorry to see you going through this. If any person knew the pain that he or she could cause another person just by pushing them away without giving them an explanation, would they really want to act like this? For whatever reason your boyfriend is acting this way, I think that by cancelling your cell phone calls, he's making it clear that he is not interested in pursuing a relationship with you.

You deserved an explanation, either way. You both have entered a kind of transaction between the two of you, and through intimacy, the transaction became even clearer. Even in a job or a business arrangement, if one party suddenly changed the nature of the contract or the rules, the other party would certainly bring them to task and say, "what gives????" Even there, the person deserves at least an explanation. If a person wants to "quit" an arrangement, that's fine, but gee, give the other person an explanation so that they can make arrangements for their own life.

As for smothering - yes, certainly women do this when they are in this position - I think that many of us have been guilty of this. However, often men do to. When I was trying to pull away from someone who wasn't right for me, he was acting smothering and clingy. It took everything in my power to not treat him as "lesser" even though I didn't enjoy the clinginess. Its a human reaction to loss.

And, Shauna, just remember what men are like when they are pursuing women - they are extremely attentive, and sometimes we feel like we can't get a moment to ourselves in order to do our jobs, attend our chores, take care of our kids, see our girl buddies, visit our parents, or, gee, go out with another guy. Its call, call, call, notice me, notice me, notice me. If you don't respond to their emails immediately, they send you an email saying, "are you there? huh, huh? When am I going to see you? Why haven't you answered, bla, bla, bla." Once they've conquered you, they relax and all the attention stops. Ugh.

So here's what you do. You dry your eyes. You go for a work out at the gym and go for a run to get rid of the tension and stress from being dumped. You realize that it has nothing to do with you - he was too cowardly to give you an explanation and too selfish to think that you deserved notice so that you could quickly move on to someone else. You realize that you are a very pretty woman (many here have told you so).

Then, you write him a very quick letter informing him that after you gave it 3 days for him to have a chance to respond, and gave him the benefit of the doubt during that time, that the opportunity has now expired. You tell him that YOU have made the decision to end the relationship. You drive over to his house, ring his door, and hand it to him in person and wish him well. You leave and show him the class and grace that he doesn't deserve, but which makes you a better person. He will think to himself, "Wow, she is an amazing person to show that kind of confidence and restraint from blowing up at me." One day he will realize what an idiot he is, but you will be long gone and you will be much further ahead.

Or, you give it to him and do blow up at him. In this case, tell him (very quickly) that he's a worm and pathetic. Don't worry - he will know why. If he doesn't, don't bother explaining it.

It comes down to manners and treating other people with respect. He is too immature to do this.

Leave, move on, and thank your lucky stars that it is ended. Believe me, if you stick around, his behavior will only get worse, and you will end up taking more abuse from him.

And, Shauna, not every man does this. He's still a child and not yet grown up.
 birdy267
Joined: 11/8/2005
Msg: 112
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/27/2005 10:51:20 PM
JDLeon. In response, your post annoyed me. Probably, that's why I'm telling you this. Don't nag Shauna for responding to each post - she's simply trying to work through tihings and trying to be courteous to people who took the time to respond to her question. Try not to respond to someone else by trashing them, and try not to assume that she is calling him many times, since you don't really know. It would piss me off too if an idiot responded to my question with a silly and useless post.

Cheers!
 kissin_kriss00
Joined: 11/28/2005
Msg: 113
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/28/2005 1:26:18 PM
honey men like that dont deseve your time... take the hint as that he has lost intrest... or that he is scared to commit... i am going thru the same thing... i had a guy on here tell me that he thought that he was falling in love with me and then boom for 3 days i didnt here from him.. and now all the sudden he is back.. just be stright up with him.... let him knowwhat u want and expect from him... and if he cant respect you he aint worth yur time... there are to many guys out there to waste your time on a jackass.... men are weird and i am not sure that we will ever understand them... sometimes they dont relize what they had untll we move on.. if you really care... hang in there but dont stop talking and getting to know other ones and if it works out it does and if it dont... it wasnt ment to be in the first place.. good luck sweetie i am right there with you....
 1inamillion7
Joined: 11/23/2005
Msg: 114
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/28/2005 1:36:45 PM
Hi honey,

I am sorry to hear that you have been hurt. I know this sounds harsh but if you read what you wrote the problem lies within. Fist you say why do guys always do this to me? An assumption that all men will do this in repeat patterns only makes for this to happen again. Maybey needs some time to himself. Most men and women need breaks even from people they like. If you hold onto someone too tight it makes them want to run. You mentioned that you know he has been signing online. That is almost stalking someone watching and waiting to see if they come online. It may be too late for this relationship to repair. But just remember that you are a special person and that you should never grovel for a mans attention. They hate that. They prefer to grovel themselves before your beauty.

Good luck Honey
 stitchimage
Joined: 12/26/2005
Msg: 115
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History
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/28/2005 1:40:06 PM
more than likely you said something that scared him. (im a guy) or offended him. and he kept a stiff upper lip as we say and you wouldnt know you said or did something wrong. see when a guy hurts a women it comes out emotionall then and there. or if not really shows on her face. we men hide our emotions very well or very deep.
and also what scares us men is the instant 6 pack of "i love you". that has a permanant connotation. I have dated women that had stars in thier eyes after our first sex. women that are alone for long period of times tend to want to fill the void as quick as possible if not bittered. review in your mind what was said. the i love you's is enough to send a guy across the galaxy if not ready.
 IceHockey101
Joined: 12/13/2005
Msg: 116
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/28/2005 1:46:23 PM
Another stupid comment from GIGIMO.

The author who wrote that book "Why do men love bichiz" is probably some real messed up person.

I sure as hell dont love Bichiz. Maybe the title should have been,

"why do men who dont want anything serious or no form of commitment love bichiz"

It doesnt apply to ALL men. I just love stupid women coming in here with their 2 cents.

If I told a girl I love her, I would do anything to make that love WORK.

What you are teaching this young girl is Wrong. You are teaching her to be something she is not?

And OP: Why would you want to change just because some guy hurt you???

If I did that to myself, I'd be the biggest player in my entire group of friends. And believe me, I HAVE some Player friends...I could steal their game from underneath if I wanted.

Just because you got hurt, dont change yourself. Next guy who loves you might really mean it. Its in the actions. Not the words.

As for women naturally being unselfish...HAHAHAHHA nice try. No cigar. Its not the sex. Its the person. I have known the MOST selfish women ever. Worst ones are the ones who DONT admit to it. But that does not mean they are all selfish. Modern women DO tend to be more selfish because they CAN. Men do it all the time. But not EVERYONE is like that.

As for you putting out and that he had enough of you...well ... this is going to sound harsh but the combination of the two of you sounds like this..

You = DUMB
Him = JERK

Now, if YOU are Dumb, and he was not a JERK, he would have made you see things differently, and maybe stayed with you or made you understand why he didnt see it working. But he's a coward.

If you were trying to be SMART, and He was NICE...He would have had to pass all these tests to get into your pants and by the end of all the testing, he'd have lost interest and said screw it and move on it...literally. Chasing a woman is fun, but if she prolongs it for a man, the man often develops this inner dislike for this woman. He finally F**ks her and leaves her.

Anyways, it has nothing to do with how long you wait before having sex, or other crap.
Some of my most longest relationships started with me having sex within the first week of meeting the woman. ALL is possible. You just gotta know what works with what type of a person so they feel COMPLETE with you, even if they already are Full of themselves! HAHA!
 Strawberries_WhipCream
Joined: 10/24/2005
Msg: 117
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/28/2005 6:47:11 PM
Well I think that this guy has other major issues health wise....
 sweetdragonfly
Joined: 12/25/2005
Msg: 118
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/28/2005 11:41:43 PM
girl dont feel alone cause my old man was caught with his hand down a girls pants on christmas morning by my seven year old and honestly i have been feeling like im dieing inside and we have been together for 3.5 years.
 sweetdragonfly
Joined: 12/25/2005
Msg: 119
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/28/2005 11:49:26 PM
let me tell you something this whole you get what you give thing is straight up bull shit cause i never beat a man but i sure got beat by a man,i never cheated on a man but i sure have been cheated on.i loved my man completly and faithfully and he shit all over me i was not a door mat but i was a good woman to him.............and just to be fair i do understand about the single mom thing and wanting the kids tio be your own.
 tickelyour?
Joined: 8/25/2005
Msg: 120
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/28/2005 11:52:47 PM
maybe its just you?
 nikkimorales23
Joined: 12/16/2004
Msg: 121
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/29/2005 12:09:13 AM
OMG! This post was like reading my own mind. This just happened to me. I was seeing this guy for a few weeks. We both have super busy schedules so when we couldn't get together we talked on the phone. Not one day went by since we met, that we didn't either see or talk to each other. Then one day, nothing.

I'm not the stalker type, so I won't call anymore and I'm not going by his place. But I just don't get it

It is a horrible feeling, Shauna. I've also noticed that some posters on here are soooo mean, it's really not even necessary. Try not to worry about them and take the support from people who genuinely responed to you.
 Lost-prodigal
Joined: 12/22/2005
Msg: 122
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/29/2005 12:29:44 AM
I seem to me that everyone has a delete key in this day and age, and some have no consideration of others when they use it !... I know how you feel to be left asking what happened and why. I always have to swallow the fact that, " If a woman doesn't care to explain her actions to me, then she is to inconsiderate for me to want to know any way !"...rejection still hurts though.
 michchick
Joined: 11/9/2005
Msg: 123
view profile
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Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/29/2005 9:48:52 AM
Hi I know excatly how your feel hon. Read dumped at Xmas. I dont understand it either I was going out with mine for 3 months. And thought we were exclusive he talked about me moving in. But in the past few days Ive found out what a monster Ive been dating. I had a freind go online and came onto him he bought it hook line and sinker even sent naked pictures of himself!! I copyed and pasted the whole conversation then sent it back to him with a big BUSTED!!! You not alone my stomache is in knots. And another sleepless night. I know its hard its hard for me too just remember your never alone. U did nothing wrong. U will overcome this. Take care and God bless Karen
 juanchito26
Joined: 12/11/2005
Msg: 124
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 12/29/2005 12:13:46 PM
shaunadanielle, you are very pretty. move on and find someone else. Avoid looks, look for a guy that will love and cherish you, but take your time to know him
 laserman
Joined: 8/25/2005
Msg: 125
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 1/7/2006 6:49:59 AM
Well I would suggest changing the word guy to guy/ladies. Both sexes are guilty of doing everything talked about.

Why? Well I would suggest many reasons...game players, lookers but not serious, still shopping and found someone else, talks about honesty but really does not know what it means, wife or hubby caught them, scared, commitment issues, mental issues, lack of manners, and well the list can go on and on.

Be true to yourself. Do only what you feel you can live with. It is their right to be wrong and screwed up and our right to look the otherway and move forward. Never let them hold you back.
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