JDLeon
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Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 26 | |
| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 12/3/2005 9:00:45 AM | buddy i am sorry to hear that..
forget figuring out the reason she left you, there are too much headache for that.
It seems there is a partern... I have a friend, He can virutally date anyone on this planet.(model face, tall, young, everyone likes him), he dated this girl for 4 years. Then last year, she dumped him.
So you see you only took 2 years to find out, and you can start dating a new person. Another thing tho, if she dump me, i would make her feel guilty about the shit she has done to me.
For future reference
If a girl does something without consider your feeling, confront her. or she will lose repect and lose interest in you.. | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 12/3/2005 9:53:55 AM |
If there is a relationship especially a marriage you just can't leave your partner because they are no longer physically attracted you them or you don't want to settle, that just selfish and greedy and it cause tremendous hurt to the other person, i know people who have been devastated by such actions.
Are you kidding me? If you're not attracted to your partner, how are you going to enjoy them? How are you going to have hot sex? How are you going to feel comfortable with them? I think it's sheer madness to stay with someone you aren't attracted to physically. I personally want the whole package when I date someone.. I don't wanna settle just to avoid hurting someone's feelings. | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 12/3/2005 9:58:32 AM | Partially
But if this happened to you or if you were in the other person shoes you may feel different.
By the "whle Package" you can't narrow things down to just a particular area, afterall it;s teh whole package that is mentioned. So if someone "lacks" in one area see the good in them in another asset of theirs. | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 12/3/2005 10:18:08 AM | Mardio, funny thing is, this did happen to me. I dated a guy for 5 years.. and then one day, outta nowhere, he called me up on the phone and said, and I quote, "Laura, you're the ugliest person I have ever met. I can't stand to look at you anymore" and he hung up the phone. And that was the last I ever heard from him.
Sure, I went crazy for a while. But then I also realized fvck that sh!t, I would never want to be with someone who didn't find me attractive.. and I would never want to be with someone I didn't find attractive either.
There are some things you can compromise on.. physical attraction is not one of them in my books! | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 12/3/2005 10:20:29 AM | It seems to me that people have a real sense of entitlement when it comes to relationships sometimes. Here's how it works.
You get together. You have some fun. You like having the fun, so you decide to have more fun on a more regular basis. One day, you realize it wouldn't be so bad to have that fun on an exclusive basis. You move on, get exclusive, and over time, learn more and more about the person through the experiences that life unfolds in your general direction. After time, you either decide to keep on keepin' on, or you move the hell on and try again elsewhere.
"Two years" may seem like a lifetime with one person, but it's a blip on the screen of our lives. It's through life experiences that we display our character -- and over time we all change. She doesn't HAVE to explain herself to you...
But she should. It's only right. So, yes, her behaviour could be better...
But I think you're living in a dream world if you thought "bliss" came with "ups and downs." You're giving mixed messages. Me, I suspect it was a good, solid relationship... just not a great one. She wanted more. She wanted something else. But regardless what she wanted, you weren't one of them.
And that's not the end of the world. Better you find out now than in five years. The only worse than wasting two years with one person is wasting two years and a day. So, you're getting out early, really, and it could have been far more catastrophic.
But don't sit around saying you deserved better, you got robbed, and don't say she's not "sane" just because she wanted more. Just *deal* and hope for better luck next time. So, sorry about your bad luck, but here's hoping the next time works for you.
And dude, don't be a victim. You got the wrong mindset. Be a warrior. You deserve better than her, now you have the chance to get it. At least you had some fun times. | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 12/3/2005 10:32:52 AM | Sorry to hear that happened to you Partially, now I partially understand (no pun intended)lol.
Actually I would say for me, that with looks i can compromise but if the person is nasty self cetred and apathetic and think only about herself, that is something i can't comprominse and I'm sure you or anyone else wouldn't either.
Also scribecalledself....you said "don't sit around saying you deserved better" i agree with that and that goes for men AND women, because women also say they won't settle and they say they deserve better, so make sure just to be clear that you mean it both ways and not having a double standard because i personally, if you havn't already guessed from my other posts, I hate hypocrisy and the double standard thing. | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 11/20/2006 7:27:12 AM | | Well, its a year past now, and I hope you've got it over now and moved on to new life. One thing to remember though: it is unavoidable that one is to dump anotoher in a relationship...so pick up someone nice rather than a ****, someone who at least would show respect and give you a reason when break-up happenes...All the best | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 11/20/2006 7:43:39 AM | | pit it down to an experiece in life...i don't think your eyes were opened to her subtle messages or you would have seen it coming....i am sorry that you were hurt...but to follow your heart and not your head is a big mistake...we all have a built in instinct to feel what is right and wrong...but as humans we tend to,too many times choose not to follow the promptings of our gut instincts....kolob | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 11/20/2006 4:07:32 PM | How about dumped for no reason after 5 years of almost total bliss.......
Oh im being a bit harsh......i actually did the dumping
My partner up til 2 days ago.....was becoming more and more distant.....wouldnt talk to me...wouldnt tell me what was going on in his mind....just seemed disinterested ( except when he wanted sex).....
so what did i do....yep
i confronted him and found out he "felt trapped" didnt want to hurt me but didnt want to be with me no more.....no real reason.....lol
still has feelings for me....BUT
oh thats hard....but can i continue to live with the feeling that IM the one who is making him feel trapped.....
I love him with all my heart
I had to let him go..... i think ive been living in a falsehood for sometime...knowing he wanted out but not willing to let him go
not wanting to go back to that oh so lonely existance i had before i met him
its so so so scary
but i also love him so much that i couldnt continue knowing how he felt, knowing that eventually he would hate me if we stayed together
so now we are apart.....
its hard
i cry at night
i want to take it all back...i want him back
But my head knows this is wrong..... i want him to be happy
i want me to be happy
we will just have to be friends.....that is better than nothing at all | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 11/20/2006 4:30:39 PM | | There are two sides to every story and we haven't heard your girlfriend's version of what went down. People do not break up for NO reason, that's ridiculous. I am truly amazed at how many times I hear the same old song, my baby left me and I don't know why, waa waa waa. Surely there were some clues, or weren't you paying attention to what she had been saying? Perhaps the relationship just ran its course, obviously there was something she needed that she wasn't getting out of being with you, and you may never figure out what that was, but the sooner you can accept that it's over, you can move on. Forget about it. | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 11/21/2006 1:36:04 AM | | Nobody gets dumped for no reason. No offence intended, but there was a reason. I have been dumped myself and under the excuse someone gives you there is a reason. Maybe it's your fault or maybe something changed in the relationship, who knows? You probably never will find out what it is. Just move on, there are "Plenty Of Fish". | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 11/21/2006 2:41:13 AM | | well i am in a similar situation right now actually. i mean i wasnt goin out with my man for 2 years but 9 months is awhile expecialy when I dont trust easily and i was hurt hard in a previous 5 year relationship. i also told my man that i was hurt really bad and he promised me that he wouldnt ever want to hurt me. well longer story short he broke up with me in an email. and he told me he loved me and we even discussed movin in together. now he wont even turn his phone on. it sucks its gonna be a long time before i get serious with another man. men just prove more and more that they are liars! | |
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Dom
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Joined: 4/28/2007
Msg: 47 | |
| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 5/9/2007 3:36:28 PM | Wow. I just dumped by BF after two years. I'm sorry to say that he was just what I needed after the turmoil of another relationship. Calm, great friendship but...... when the other aspects of my life got settled, i.e. job etc, I found myself looking at him and going "Two years? already? " I was COMFORTABLE and bored. Don't get me wrong he was OK the relationship just didn't have that zing. So why settle? I was asking myself some serious questions like "If he got hit by a bus tomorrow would I stick around?" and the answer was "no". Not pretty but true. We started discussions on long term plans and he was so sure of himself ... and I felt bad that those 2 years had gone by without me noticing and that he really thought it was for keeps. I just didn't know how to tell him that I didn't want to settle and I felt worse.
Maybe your girl just wanted more than comfortable. Sorry about you feeling gutted and hope you find THE one on POF.
To end my story, then I found out he lied. Lied for 2 years about someting serious and I didn't feel bad anymore for dumping his sorry ass.
Hang in there. | |
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| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 9/16/2007 7:03:55 PM | Did you know?..that statistically...the results are on average
...a broken heart takes 3 yrs to heal
Im gonna offer u a SERIOUS piece of foresight here that I implore you to consider...
my ex dumped me about 4 months ago after two years
I have started dating again, and realised that there really are plenty of fish out there to be caught, or should it be me that's caught?? - either way, it is time for me to find that someone special again
The following situation is the repercussion of exactly ur circumstances
...and shows exceptionally well WHY u shouldnt b dating yet.
What you choose to do is up to you but... reconsider taking time out for ur heart to heal a little :kiss:
Here's a quick quote...
"he just recently got out of a long term relationship but said he was ready"
Now go read the thread title:
Thread: ladies watch your backs!
First Impressions
Posted: 8/18/2007 407 AM
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4tom
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Joined: 5/28/2007
Msg: 50 | |
| Is it just me, or is being dumped for no reason after two years out of line????
Posted: 9/16/2007 7:05:44 PM | I once heard it said " a relationship of two halfs that fits together, if either discover for what ever reason that its not working its better for everyone in the long run to let go and move on. The favour they do you is leaving..." this allows you to stop wasting time on something that can't brink you happiness so you free to be open to true happiness when it comes along... I think this woman just couldn't bring herself to disclose her reasons and allow you closure...
Look at it this way ! she done you a favour by leaving now.... it be so much worse if she wasted 10 years of your life making you unhappy and still going anyway.
We all been there at some stage.... it just a question of finding the right fish...
best of luck... | |
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