| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/8/2005 1:41:09 PM | hey sumbudy....we are both from tha same town...i tried to write you but yer restrictions only let males write you.......would love to meet, say hey, drink coffee or go fishin sometime... feel free to write me.... | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/8/2005 5:33:35 PM | I could get into VERY long discertations on this subject, but really, you should have defined what you meant by a disability... physically handicapped? mentally handicapped? we're all handicapped in some way although a lot of people don't even realize that fact, any kind of restriction or even the slightest impedement can be considered a disability or handicap.My youngest brother is a non-functional autistic with an IQ of 30, but I love him dearly, I have a very high IQ (am a card carrying member of MENSA) but I am just as mentally handicaped as he is for being so different and limited because the way I think is different than others.
OT- I have dated women with disabilities in the past and might again | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/8/2005 5:45:55 PM | I'm sorry I missed your other thread too!!!!!!!!!!!!
And you know what, anyone who would judge you and be sooooo mean and awful is a lot more "disabled" than you will ever be!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have back problems and am getting ready to have surgery. Some guys look at that as someone who is "needy", but that isn't the case at all!!!!!!!!!! You obviously are a wonderful person, and quite capable of taking care of the things you need to. Like I said, if someone can't see that, they are the ones that are totally f**ked up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hugs,
Alicia | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/8/2005 6:28:33 PM | | I am disabled having had brain surgery/coma (fishing accident) and bipolar disorder .... recovering alcoholic to boot. My memory, concentration, and stess tolerance are lower than before. The keys in my life are honesty, responsibility, open-mindedness and acceptance. Would I date somebody (like Sumbudy!) with a disability? Absolutely would consider. I would never say no because of a disability. That's like being prejudiced against myself. No judging, no generalizations for this guy! Recently I was dating a "normal" POF woman for a month. We were having very nice times together. Then, she sent me a scathing email after I canceled a couple of dates (due to kids and work), one with a day's notice, other a few hours before, and did not call her for a week or so. Her email was so nasty, judgemental, and accusatory, calling me a liar with no responsibilty...and much more. Needless to say it's over. So my point is that judging others, making assumptions, and generalizing based on a condition--or no condition at all--is disgusting. And sometimes the "normal" folks are sicker than we are! Peace out from South Florida, Ben. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/8/2005 6:31:11 PM | | Name me a man nowadays who isn't disabled? Mentally or is it physically. Mentally, usually, they want a woman to be their companion until they marry them. Then physically, it's called premature ejaculation. Generalizing the word disabled. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/8/2005 11:32:18 PM | Hi Sumbudy
I read your profile and tried to write to you. It said I wasn't the right age and gender. Drop me a note if you want to see my pic. I would like to know what your story is and who that adorable child is in the photo. May I say you are quite beautiful and I love your smile. Hope you are doing well. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/9/2005 3:53:53 AM | i have a disability also and i know first hand how dificult and easy it its to date ppl who are "normal"i think everyone who's ever been hurt in their life could be difined as a person with a diability.disability is when you're limited either physically or mentally right.well if a person is hurt emotionally it effects their way of thinking right? that could lead to something physical right? anyway what i'm trying to say is ppl will "limit" themselve to the point that the next person to try to love them will have dificult time reaching to them,so if you've ever been hurt and you quote yourself as normal but have a guard up then your disabled to me too.you're limited to let you heart to be loved and you too.so isn't the question should be "would any one date me?" then cause we all have disabilties.
lori | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/9/2005 7:22:48 AM | i agree with most of you. and YES there are all types of disabilites, just some more severe than others. The man who started this thread was speaking of a physical disability though that people judge right of the bat because of appearance.
but i agree LOri, that most have been hurt and then limit themselves , therefor giving themselves a disability. advantage of that though, is these people "like myself also" who have a tendency to limit love due to past hurts, DO have the opportunity and a choice to change if they choose.
The other types of disabilities that are not chosen, "like mine as well" , is something we have to live with . We can better ourselves and continue to work on improvement, but we cannot just simply "change our minds" as we can do with the emotional disabilities we give ourselves. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/9/2005 9:31:09 AM | Hey man, I am sorry you got emails from people picking on you about your disability. Hey, I grew up being picked on by both hearing and deaf! I was born hard of hearing and very smart but was placed in a deaf school instead of mainstreaming and oh.. deaf kids picked on me day by day till my mom pulled out and put me into mainstreaming and I loved that.. Better education but the hearing students ignored me and deaf students picked on me till graduation.
so you are not alone. I totally understand how you feel. I am sure you are a nice man and you should have no trouble finding the right woman.
Hey, I had girlfriends come and go. My longest was 6 years as friends with her.. but longest relationship was almost 2 years. Oh well. I think I met the wrong ones. lol.
I lost more hearing last year august to tinnitus and now I am deaf. Cant hear good at all but still have beautiful speech and read lips. I should be fine with hearing women to meet and have a relationship with one when the right one comes along.
I can sign too. If there are any deaf or hearing women who knows how to sign, no problem. One thing though, I am not friends with any of those losers I went to school with and not at any reunions at all. I buried my past and looking forward today and tomorrow whatever that may be! whoo! lol!!
so.. Where are you my bride?? (hint hint, my book title I wrote and will be published). | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/11/2005 5:53:59 AM | | Yes without a doubt I would date someone with a disability but not because of that. It would be for the person they are beyond thier personal challenges in life. HAving a disability is something that society does not except very well. Usually its just ignorance and lack of taking time to learn about people. They see someone in a wheelchair or walks funny and they immediately steer clear of this person. If those people took five minutes to stop and ask a question or 2 that it would amaze them how normal we really are. On many of us, Its just our legs or something of that nature doesn't function correctly. Just because we can't walk or some other problem doesn't mean our brains don't work right. For all those people out there that do not understand people with disabilities, take time out of your busy schedule and stop and talk to someone aand try to understand how much of a person there is beyond that flaw they have. It might suprise you. Thank you and god bless everyone during this holiday season. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/18/2005 5:45:21 PM | | it is really nice to see how many understanding ppl there are out there in the world wen it comes to showing consideration to people with disabilitys i must say befor i made my first post on this thred i walked the earth thinkin that "mainstrem" ppl were mostly shallow aragont ppl that would not give a person with a disabilty a second glance wen it comes to dating some one with a disabilty but seing just how many of u have and would consider it again makes me smile ( wich i aint done since i was in grade 6 ) warms my heart and all that stuff ... i guess all it takes is a few kind words to make even the most ummm emotionless person show some kind of emotion. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/18/2005 6:20:43 PM | | I would not have any problem dating somebody with a disability. When I date someone it is for who they are as a person and having a disability does not impact this. As long as I am compatiable with someone, I am not going to let a disability keep me apart from someone that might be the love of my life. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/22/2005 7:09:40 PM | | right on sunnymommy (laughs to self) i my self curntly am dating some one now whom im madly inlove with she has a.d.d and a.d.h.d and to top things off she has o.d.d i am telling u the last week we been together have been very busy she is always on the move cuz of her a.d.h.d last night i had to force her to relax and unwind cuz if she didnt she would of burnt her self out of engery ... | |
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Rhett1
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Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 42 | |
| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/22/2005 9:05:11 PM | First of all...Pun-kin...you are a steaming pile of shit.
Read her profile everyone and she proves it.
I work with people with mental and physical disabilities and you know what? I have made some GREAT friends through my job. Just because a person cannot always do the things that a person without disabilities can do, doesn't make them LESS of a person.
We lost a woman a few days ago, to congestive heart failure, due to kidney disease and a number of other physical disabilities. This woman was more of a person than people like Pun-kin could ever hope to be. She was funny, smart, and one of the most genuinely kind souls I've ever met. She cared about the people in her life and she wasn't afraid to show it.
If someone has a disability, I hope others don't rule this individual out as a possible friend or significant other, they may lose out on one of the most wonderful people. Good luck to you and don't let the bigots and judgers get you down. You don't need those types in your life, anyway. Take care. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/22/2005 9:17:22 PM | It would depend on the man's attitude. I was friends with a man who had back problems and was in a wheelchair. He picked me about my weight, then got mad because I told him off. He blamed me for being mean to him because of his disability. Ya, right!
I'm mentally disabled. I am bipolar aka manic depressive. I think I have a good attitude about it, but if I was to discourage a man, I tell him about my challenges. See how they run!  | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/22/2005 9:31:26 PM | I ABSOLULTELY AM FURIOUS!!!!!!!!!!
First of all I am sorry OP about your situation and I KNOW you deserve alot more respect and to be treated with diginity. Shallow idiots will have there pay day some day!!
Pun-kin Grow up and get a spine, how could you say soemthing like that ya drunkie!!
No offense but it is about time that we as a society started to contribute to the well being of others and STOP BEING IN DENIAL about the wrongs we do, UM SICK OF IT!! Hoiw people can be so cruel to others is repugnant and putrid.
When will we begin to understand ladies and geltmen that the more we continue to judge and discriminate others and put others down the worse things will be and ARE getting. How could we just be so passive about shit like this. This is hurtful discrimination and really in it's essense hatred against human dignity that is within every single human being.
It is time that we start to look inisde ourselves and start to realize what is going on and how things are not getting better, I ask that we start to trate and see people for the way they want to be treated and seen.
Please for the LOVE OF GOD lets try to makes things better for all people.
Really folks this sort of stuff needs to STOP !!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/22/2005 9:37:57 PM | I hate to play the gene card again, but...
It's all natural selection. Why would you want a mate that will be eaten by a tiger when you are trying to run away? But something like a mental illness (i.e depression, bipolar, etc) doesn't affect your tiger escaping abilities.
This isn't an issue now a days, that being your need to run away from tigers, but it's still something that is part of being human. But yeah, of course it can be bypassed completely by most modern people. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/22/2005 9:44:33 PM | ^^^
You have the nerve to shoot that "natural selection" stuff here. That stuff is a load of crap. Thats a stupid excuse to justify their stupid putrid shallowness.
Get that gene talk and shove it up where the sun don't shine. | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/22/2005 10:18:24 PM | Oh ya... modern people have to worry about getting eaten by tigers. :) I know I have had to escape at least seven tiger attacks this week alone.
Genetics are often not associated with many disabilities. Acquired disabilities are fairly prevelant as well.
Besides, this is an age of intellectual evolution, not physical evolution. Humans are at the top of the food chain because we can think more effectively, not run faster. | |
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zendy
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Joined: 12/6/2005
Msg: 48 | |
| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 12/23/2005 2:27:48 AM | | As many have said, most people live with some sort of disability. For myself personally I would prefer to date someone with a physical disability then a personality disability. Igorance, selfishness, plain stupidity are a lot more to overcome and live with. I would rather date a man with no legs then a man with no compassion. Pun-kin, I honestly think I lost a few brain cells just reading your post. | |
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stats
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Joined: 11/3/2005
Msg: 49 | |
| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 1/3/2006 3:10:28 PM | Gee ,sorry but i know your trying to be nice or polite but what do you mean by you would give a woman that was disabled more consideration?????? i have a disability and use a service dog.Let me say that just because of my disability ,it does not mean im desperate for a man in my life.im fine with who i am,and if i do meet someone special in my life that would be nice....... as people with different types of disabilities are the same as any able bodied persons''.We are caring and long to have children, careers,goals in life and yes believe it or not we have the same desires to be held loved and to make love to someone in our life as well.If a guy told me he wanted to go out with me because he felt sorry for me or because he did not want to say anything right away because of my disability''',well sorry but god forgive me for saying this and i dont like to swear,as not very nice but ,they can just f... off.''As this really hits a nerve for me.As well at university ,when i help sometimes help test paramedic students or nursing students with my profs as im a RN ,continuing my studies and hope one day to get my masters.some of the students are shocked or taken back that im a nurse and coming into the class with my service dog''.Maybe think about your attitudes about disability and the types and how it can affect any of us.: I am a RN that is human just like you and there are many people out there just like me''. . | |
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| WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY?PART TWO!
Posted: 1/3/2006 3:33:50 PM | Blackwolf, my answer to your question is a loud resounding, YES!
In 1973 I married a man who was post-polio, he has had many surgeries and wears a full- length leg brace. We had 4 kids and divorced in 1985. However, he has been my friend for all these years. I remarried in 1988 and my husband died in 1999....Bill was there doing all he could to help.
So, if people don't open their eyes to the possibilities in all types of people, you don't need them anyway!
Just keep on shining and I bet when you least expect it, you'll find somebody wonderful! | |
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